This discussion is now closed.
Check out other Related discussions
- If you don’t have kids or get married
- I want to get married and have kids
- Who am I supposed to date/marry?
- step parents and student finance
- Female British Pakistani interested in marriage, but concerned
- We are not the right match but love each other
- Dating with kids help! 10 year age gap
- why are families getting smaller and smaller?
- What are signs of infertility?
- Relationship HELP!
- Maintenance loan and ex girlfriend
- What needs prioritising in my life right now?
- How would most Muslims react if a Muslim girl got married to a non-Muslim?
- Has anyone met someone from TSR in person?
- Girls, why doesn't there seem to be interest in marriage & kids these days?
- 60 questions to deepen your relationship
- Step parent income affecting my loan
- Is 22 yo a late age to just START looking to get married ? ( Muslim)
- Matchmaking dating services
- What should i feed my goldfish????
I want to have children but not be married.
I am 19 years old and my brother is 15. Our parents aren’t married but are still together. Personally, I want to have kids in the future but not be married. Yet, I do want to be in a longtime relationship with a woman. What criticism will I get for this? And is it okay for a man to think about children before marriage when it comes to thinking about a future or am I unreasonable?
Scroll to see replies
It is normal to think about kids. About the marriage thing, I don't want to speak for all girls, but I would prefer to be married, it means something for me personally. But there could be girls who don't want marriage and just like you want to stay in a relationship. I don't think you would be criticised, it worked out for your parents, so nothing wrong with that 
Yeah, you could adopt or foster or use a surrogate
Original post by burberry_butter
Yeah, you could adopt or foster or use a surrogate
Well, unmarried people in relationships can have a child naturally. Unless you believe in you shouldn’t have sex before you get married, which if that is your view is perfectly fine.
That's fine.
I'm a 26 year old female with a very similar attitude.
I'll be going down the ivf coparenting route and probably won't get married.
It is important to be totally honest with potential dates and coparents to ensure that you have compatible ambitions & lifestyle preferences.
Best to avoid getting closely involved with those girls who prefer to wait until marriage or come from a socially conservative background and have plans for an expensive engagement party/fancy wedding.
Good luck!
I'm a 26 year old female with a very similar attitude.
I'll be going down the ivf coparenting route and probably won't get married.
It is important to be totally honest with potential dates and coparents to ensure that you have compatible ambitions & lifestyle preferences.
Best to avoid getting closely involved with those girls who prefer to wait until marriage or come from a socially conservative background and have plans for an expensive engagement party/fancy wedding.
Good luck!
Original post by Evan2002
Well, unmarried people in relationships can have a child naturally. Unless you believe in you shouldn’t have sex before you get married, which if that is your view is perfectly fine.
No ofc, I am fully aware of this, but OP, didn't seem like that's what he meant, and put greater emphasis on the kids part, and seemed like he isn't in a relationship rn. But ofc to freely co-parent a child conceived naturally is v common too in this day and age.
Original post by burberry_butter
No ofc, I am fully aware of this, but OP, didn't seem like that's what he meant, and put greater emphasis on the kids part, and seemed like he isn't in a relationship rn. But ofc to freely co-parent a child conceived naturally is v common too in this day and age.
That was the OP's post you quoted though
peoples have their own life goals and it's okay if you don't wanna become married but i think if you are together with someone for at least 3-5 years, that's probably the best time to have a baby.
but personally i'd wait until marriage but this is about you!!! so you do what makes you happy and good luck!!!!
but personally i'd wait until marriage but this is about you!!! so you do what makes you happy and good luck!!!!
Original post by KA_P
That was the OP's post you quoted though
Yeah, I realised after. If that's what he wants then its cool too, no one cares
Original post by Trinculo
I shall not see infants born into bast.ardy. What scarlet woman would you have bear them?
What’s wrong with it?
Original post by Evan2002
What’s wrong with it?
The decline in moral fibre.
Original post by Trinculo
The decline in moral fibre.
What do you mean by “moral fibre”.
Original post by Evan2002
What do you mean by “moral fibre”.
You can still be committed to each other in a normal unmarried relationship without any adultery or promiscuity involved.
Original post by Evan2002
You can still be committed to each other in a normal unmarried relationship without any adultery or promiscuity involved.
Hello. Before marriage I would have sex, but I wouldn't have kids at all. But that's a preference, if you have another one then we should respect your decision.
Original post by Evan2002
I am 19 years old and my brother is 15. Our parents aren’t married but are still together. Personally, I want to have kids in the future but not be married. Yet, I do want to be in a longtime relationship with a woman. What criticism will I get for this? And is it okay for a man to think about children before marriage when it comes to thinking about a future or am I unreasonable?
lol,its contradictory
Original post by legit help
lol,its contradictory
Yeah but lots of people have children unmarked now. It’s just there’s a lot of people who are just cynical and have old fashioned views.
Related discussions
- If you don’t have kids or get married
- I want to get married and have kids
- Who am I supposed to date/marry?
- step parents and student finance
- Female British Pakistani interested in marriage, but concerned
- We are not the right match but love each other
- Dating with kids help! 10 year age gap
- why are families getting smaller and smaller?
- What are signs of infertility?
- Relationship HELP!
- Maintenance loan and ex girlfriend
- What needs prioritising in my life right now?
- How would most Muslims react if a Muslim girl got married to a non-Muslim?
- Has anyone met someone from TSR in person?
- Girls, why doesn't there seem to be interest in marriage & kids these days?
- 60 questions to deepen your relationship
- Step parent income affecting my loan
- Is 22 yo a late age to just START looking to get married ? ( Muslim)
- Matchmaking dating services
- What should i feed my goldfish????
Latest
Trending
Last reply 4 days ago
My friend might be getting extra time and i hate it.Last reply 4 days ago
Just found out about UCL stat test but can't afford to sit itLast reply 2 weeks ago
Dad keeps criticising my university degree choiceLast reply 2 weeks ago
Is this pathetic or genuinely something to be upset aboutTrending
Last reply 4 days ago
My friend might be getting extra time and i hate it.Last reply 4 days ago
Just found out about UCL stat test but can't afford to sit itLast reply 2 weeks ago
Dad keeps criticising my university degree choiceLast reply 2 weeks ago
Is this pathetic or genuinely something to be upset about
