Listen, relax. Calm down. I promise you it’s not a big deal at all. Only the first outbreak is painful and horrible.
I had one outbreak around 4 years ago. I’ve never had another one and I’m not even on regular medication. My current partner, who’s been with me for 2 years has never had an outbreak even though we have been having unprotected sex this whole time.
I know you feel guilty about passing it on. I felt like crap when I first found out and thought I’ll never be able to date again, but honestly I sometimes forget I even have it now because I’ve never had to deal with it again.