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Need Advice

Hey, I am feeling like I am losing control over everything in my life. Although I know it's normal to not have control over certain stuff but the plans I made and the way I thought things would be, my life is going completely the opposite right now. That has triggered behavioural changes and it's just stressful. I have even recently messed up one of my close friendships and we are not really friends anymore. This was a big hit on my mental health as I wasn't ready for it. I am a student and 18 and although my grades are decent due to certain reasons I feel like my grades will start to drop soon too. Please any advice. What am I supposed to do when I feel like everything is shutting down on me.
Hello, I’m really sorry to hear you are feeling this way, but know there is help available!
Are there any IAPT services local to you you can get in contact with? If you look on the NHS website, it will give you an option to search for services local to you. These will help you with things such as offering CBT. It sounds like you need someone to talk to. Alternatively, is there anyone at college you could reach out to for help? Do they have a wellbeing service?
You could also reach out to your friends, even if you feel youve not been in contact much lately, and just meet up with them for lunch, explain to them what is going on, and I’m sure they will understand and will try and support you in anyway they can.

You’re not alone, and there will always be help available for you. If you really start to struggle and you panic, you can always use a helpline such as the samaritans
Original post by Anonymous
Hey, I am feeling like I am losing control over everything in my life. Although I know it's normal to not have control over certain stuff but the plans I made and the way I thought things would be, my life is going completely the opposite right now. That has triggered behavioural changes and it's just stressful. I have even recently messed up one of my close friendships and we are not really friends anymore. This was a big hit on my mental health as I wasn't ready for it. I am a student and 18 and although my grades are decent due to certain reasons I feel like my grades will start to drop soon too. Please any advice. What am I supposed to do when I feel like everything is shutting down on me.


So what if your grades do go down?

So your grades are going down on some stupid university degree? What consequence is there to that?

You might get chucked off your course? Good. Go and do something more fulfilling than stupid academic assignments and swotting for stupid exams.

You might get a lower classification of degree. So what? Nobody in the real world cares what grade of degree you got.

You're an adult now. You can do whatever the heck you like. As long it's legal, no one has the right to get on your case for whatever you do.
Original post by Squiggles1238
Hello, I’m really sorry to hear you are feeling this way, but know there is help available!
Are there any IAPT services local to you you can get in contact with? If you look on the NHS website, it will give you an option to search for services local to you. These will help you with things such as offering CBT. It sounds like you need someone to talk to. Alternatively, is there anyone at college you could reach out to for help? Do they have a wellbeing service?
You could also reach out to your friends, even if you feel youve not been in contact much lately, and just meet up with them for lunch, explain to them what is going on, and I’m sure they will understand and will try and support you in anyway they can.

You’re not alone, and there will always be help available for you. If you really start to struggle and you panic, you can always use a helpline such as the samaritans


I tried taking help from my college and it helped a bit but it's still annoying. Anyway thanks for the advice I will look into it :smile:
Original post by Dunnig Kruger
So what if your grades do go down?

So your grades are going down on some stupid university degree? What consequence is there to that?

You might get chucked off your course? Good. Go and do something more fulfilling than stupid academic assignments and swotting for stupid exams.

You might get a lower classification of degree. So what? Nobody in the real world cares what grade of degree you got.

You're an adult now. You can do whatever the heck you like. As long it's legal, no one has the right to get on your case for whatever you do.


Pretty confident advice 😲 but thanks
Original post by Anonymous
Hey, I am feeling like I am losing control over everything in my life. Although I know it's normal to not have control over certain stuff but the plans I made and the way I thought things would be, my life is going completely the opposite right now. That has triggered behavioural changes and it's just stressful. I have even recently messed up one of my close friendships and we are not really friends anymore. This was a big hit on my mental health as I wasn't ready for it. I am a student and 18 and although my grades are decent due to certain reasons I feel like my grades will start to drop soon too. Please any advice. What am I supposed to do when I feel like everything is shutting down on me.

I've been down that road before and lost my best friend (which eventually worked out cause we resolved it after 2 years of ignoring each other's existence lol) and also just dealt with having to accept lower grades than I was used to.

What always kept me going was thinking about what I look forward to in the future, like travelling to Japan and tasting all sorts of food, going to New York, eventually owning my own apartment with nice lil plants and whatever and essentially using that to motivate me to go on because I know that if I sit here and think about the situation more, then it's just going to make me sadder if that makes any sense. So like think about the things you're excited about.

I've also taken up journaling and ranting into that book really allowed me to straight up see my thoughts and as cliche as that sounds, to me it definitely worked.

Also just ranting. In general. I know you just messed up one of your close friendships but just find anyone to rant to or like scream at that would listen to you and that stuff honestly makes me feel better. I tried counselling at school and having the idea that someone's there to just listen to me rant helped.

Or like take the time to do the things you love to kinda distract yourself (you'll eventually start to think it isn't as all bad as it seems).

I'm your age too btw so Idk if you're going through exams rn but I also say just focus on doing well on those if you do have them. :smile: Like, just think positively. Easier said than done. I know but like just keep pushing cause Ik you'll get where you should be in life and these things are just hurdles.

Idk if any of that made any sense but I hope some of it did ;'))
Original post by Anonymous
I've been down that road before and lost my best friend (which eventually worked out cause we resolved it after 2 years of ignoring each other's existence lol) and also just dealt with having to accept lower grades than I was used to.

What always kept me going was thinking about what I look forward to in the future, like travelling to Japan and tasting all sorts of food, going to New York, eventually owning my own apartment with nice lil plants and whatever and essentially using that to motivate me to go on because I know that if I sit here and think about the situation more, then it's just going to make me sadder if that makes any sense. So like think about the things you're excited about.

I've also taken up journaling and ranting into that book really allowed me to straight up see my thoughts and as cliche as that sounds, to me it definitely worked.

Also just ranting. In general. I know you just messed up one of your close friendships but just find anyone to rant to or like scream at that would listen to you and that stuff honestly makes me feel better. I tried counselling at school and having the idea that someone's there to just listen to me rant helped.

Or like take the time to do the things you love to kinda distract yourself (you'll eventually start to think it isn't as all bad as it seems).

I'm your age too btw so Idk if you're going through exams rn but I also say just focus on doing well on those if you do have them. :smile: Like, just think positively. Easier said than done. I know but like just keep pushing cause Ik you'll get where you should be in life and these things are just hurdles.

Idk if any of that made any sense but I hope some of it did ;'))


Thanks a lot 😊 that gave me some hope that everything will end fine one day
Original post by Anonymous
Thanks a lot 😊 that gave me some hope that everything will end fine one day

Good 🙂 I wish you all the best and that day will come. Godspeed.

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