Am I overreacting? After 3rd date he is behaving like this

I met this coworker’s friend and had 3 dates. Tbh we got well on great and he even told his friends I was great (someone told me hehe). These 3 dates occurred in 2 weeks, he insisted a lot to see me.

Last time we had sex. After this 3 date, we texted a bit here and there and last Thursday I told him I would like to see him Sunday (yesterday). He told me he wasn’t sure he could and that we would talk about it. Finally, he didn’t text so I had no confirmation or excuse from him, and he hasn’t texted me until today which was the 4th day without news from him.

In our texting he doesn’t mention anything about why he didn’t text to go out yesterday and neither has he rescheduled another date. Just random stuff and slow convo, answering in time gaps.

I don’t understand ANYTHING and I have decided to be distant. What do you think is happening? In case he just wanted sex, why is he texting today?
Hope you understand me, I’m not a native.

Reply 1

Zarek

You’re very clear. I think in early dates, and to be honest even beyond, nothing is guaranteed and it’s quite possible that for some inexplicable reason he’s gone cold. You can either leave the ball in his court or put it on the table and ask where things stand

Reply 2

1582

Volunteer Team

...and I have decided to be distant.

Bad idea. Don't drag this out longer than need be. Ask him directly if he's still interested. Maybe he did just want sex, maybe he was genuinely interested and now after sleeping with you has a case of the ick, or maybe he's just got something going on in his life right now that he hasn't told you about yet. Regardless of the answer it's better to just ask and know now where you stand and, if it's over, you can start work on getting over him. And if he dodges the question then call him out on it.

(edited 1 year ago)

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Well I told him he was Mr. ghost and told me he knew we have a pending date. I guess he just told me that because I called him ghost

Reply 4

Surnia

You've dated, you've had sex, but you still only text. Why not pick up the phone and call him? Or visit?

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

Original post by Surnia

You've dated, you've had sex, but you still only text. Why not pick up the phone and call him? Or visit?

He’s always soooo busy. I just cant do that and it is stalker ish

Reply 6

Admit-One

Universities Forum Helper

Original post by Anonymous

He’s always soooo busy. I just cant do that and it is stalker ish

Stalkerish to call someone that you’ve dated and slept with? What?

Reply 7

Surnia

Original post by Anonymous

He’s always soooo busy. I just cant do that and it is stalker ish

Is he busy or does he say he's busy? If the former, why are you so bothered that he didn't get in touch? Why did you leave it 4 days without getting in touch, either? And if you know him well enough to sleep with him, what wrong with going to his place?

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

Original post by Surnia

He’s truly busy, but doesn’t make place for me either. I’m not going to places where I’m not invited

Reply 9

Surnia

Original post by Anonymous

He’s truly busy, but doesn’t make place for me either. I’m not going to places where I’m not invited

If you are intimate and comfortable enough to sleep with someone, what's the problem? When I was dating a guy, we would sometimes visit each other unannounced. If you want to know what is happening, go and talk to him face-to-face. He is the only one who can tell you, but if you won't do that, move on until.you are mature enough to not jump into sex and know how to communicate with a partner.