Depression Society MkII Watch

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xemilyx
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#2141
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#2141
(Original post by raspberrybubbles)
third time unlucky, or lucky depending on how you'd see it. bottled out. failure even at that
you're not a failure :hugs:
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xemilyx
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#2142
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(Original post by Sabertooth)
Do you know why you're feeling low, or is it just general eveningness? You said you went for a drink but didn't enjoy it, was it all the people around or what?

Uni....oh dear Not sure if I'm going to go or not. Already failed twice terrified of failing again, so I'm just trying to work it out now whether to email and defer or to brace my teeth and throw myself at it again (probably failing).

You're not a failure :hugs: where are you going this time? are they aware of everything? It will work out! Plus you're going to do classics, we're a friendly bunch of people!

Lots of stuff going on.... but tonight it was the busyness of it all, and just feeling rubbish
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raspberrybubbles
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#2143
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#2143
(Original post by xemilyx)
you're not a failure :hugs:
I am. I can't even throw myself off a motorway bridge... I should have finished the job years ago
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jonathan122
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#2144
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#2144
(Original post by raspberrybubbles)
I am. I can't even throw myself off a motorway bridge... I should have finished the job years ago
Kate,

I hope you're ok. You really aren't a failure - you're ill, and you're coping with it. Yes, it's a struggle, but you're a success. If you'd thrown yourself off that bridge, then that would have been failure, but you didn't, and that makes you one of the strongest people I know.

:hugs:

Please PM me if you need to talk.
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jonathan122
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To everyone else, I'm sorry I haven't been there for you always during the last couple of weeks, but I'm here now, if I can help. :hugs:

Saber, how was your holiday? :hugs:
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jonathan122
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(Original post by xemilyx)
Haven't posted in ages. Sorry everyone. Hope yo're all okay :hugs: summers almost over and i'm panicking a bit. Not too sure why.

Luke suprised me by coming down last week and he left yesterday. It was an amazing suprise. Really really needed it.

Miss him now not smiling anymore. Worried about everything. Always. I'm a big mess up. When mum and dad find out they will go ape.

I just want to vanish into thin air. Life would be easier for everyone. Meh. I don't know. Really don't know anymore.

Mum and dad don't like friend c because they think the friendship doesn't do anything for me because i take on so. Feel confused about it all.

Crying is making my eyes puffy. I'm selfish aren't i? Always talking about me. Also my paranoia is reaching new heights. Fab.

Liz sorry i didn't message you time got away from me.
:hugs:

Don't vanish, Emily. :no:
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gooner1991
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Urgh I HATE my mum.
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jonathan122
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#2148
(Original post by gooner1991)
Urgh I HATE my mum.
:hugs:

What's wrong?
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gooner1991
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#2149
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#2149
(Original post by jonathan122)
:hugs:

What's wrong?
She's just horrible. She was struck off as a doctor 3 years ago for falsely claiming benefits and she hasn't bothered to find a job. She constantly goes on about how broke she is yet goes out every single night getting drunk leaving me to look after my little sister who calls me Mum. I love my sister to pieces but it's not fair on her.

She's just stumbd home with my aunt and didn't have enough money to pay the cab driver so I've had to pay 30 quid (which I was saving to pay for my LNAT test) to pay for her.
She's violent and has an alcohol problem and won't get help and I'm sick of her
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Not Invented Yet
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#2150
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#2150
(Original post by gooner1991)
She's just horrible. She was struck off as a doctor 3 years ago for falsely claiming benefits and she hasn't bothered to find a job. She constantly goes on about how broke she is yet goes out every single night getting drunk leaving me to look after my little sister who calls me Mum. I love my sister to pieces but it's not fair on her.

She's just stumbd home with my aunt and didn't have enough money to pay the cab driver so I've had to pay 30 quid (which I was saving to pay for my LNAT test) to pay for her.
She's violent and has an alcohol problem and won't get help and I'm sick of her
I'm really sorry to hear your mum's being so difficult. I know you've probably already looked into this before, but just in case you haven't, sites like www.al-anonuk.org.uk and Addaction can give you support and advice about dealing with family members who have alcohol problems. It's really unfair of her to expect you to spend your time and money on things that she should be taking care of, but I hope things get better soon! :hugs:
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starchild
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#2151
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#2151
:cry:
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Areontas
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#2152
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#2152
(Original post by starchild)
:cry:
:hugs:, what's up?
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starchild
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#2153
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I really hate David at the moment, he insists on reading over my shoulder at these posts even though he knows this is a personal space. He knows i tell you guys more and says that he reads it sometimes so he can find out how i feel. He's hounding me again and again and i hate how he can just treat me like this. He's turning into Patrick, and i hate how he's going on and on at me saying im not listenning to me. I dont want to listen to him because he has broken my trust and says that although i tell him things, he wants to know more and more i dont want to be with him anymore. He's really hurt me by spying on me. He wont leave me alone now, i want to be alone and hes going on and on at me. He says i dont care when I do.

I hate how everytime i trust someone they just throw it back in my face. I think I may have to break up with him, i to be honest dont want to be connected to anyone ever again. I want to be alone and just be by myself. Ive managed all these years and now ive had to go and get into a relationship.

ARGHHHh
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Areontas
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#2154
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#2154
(Original post by starchild)
I really hate David at the moment, he insists on reading over my shoulder at these posts even though he knows this is a personal space. He knows i tell you guys more and says that he reads it sometimes so he can find out how i feel. He's hounding me again and again and i hate how he can just treat me like this. He's turning into Patrick, and i hate how he's going on and on at me saying im not listenning to me. I dont want to listen to him because he has broken my trust and says that although i tell him things, he wants to know more and more i dont want to be with him anymore. He's really hurt me by spying on me. He wont leave me alone now, i want to be alone and hes going on and on at me. He says i dont care when I do.

I hate how everytime i trust someone they just throw it back in my face. I think I may have to break up with him, i to be honest dont want to be connected to anyone ever again. I want to be alone and just be by myself. Ive managed all these years and now ive had to go and get into a relationship.

ARGHHHh
Oh dear - things do sound pretty stressful! I think he's just going about things in completely the wrong way. His intentions are probably good, because he cares about you and wants to understand - however, just going on at you and constantly smothering you isn't going to help. Some guys just don't know how to deal with feelings. You've got people like David, who always seem to pester when there's a problem - and then others, who back off and give you your own space. Unfortunately, you've ended up with the first type. I am still really sure he cares though.

You sound stressed at the moment which probably comes across in the way you speak. When you're feeling calmer, just explain to him that you appreciate that he cares, but he's really putting you off by bothering you all the time, and you would just appreciate some time to yourself. Time alone can really help someone assess your thoughts, although David might be worried that if you do spend too much time alone, you'll end up breaking up with him (which is exactly what your feelings seem to be pushing you to do). Relationships usually are hard work; unfortunately, they don't run smoothly. But once you've had some time to yourself and time to mull over things, you may realise you do feel lonely and perhaps being alone isn't the best option. :hugs:
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jonathan122
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#2155
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#2155
(Original post by starchild)
I really hate David at the moment, he insists on reading over my shoulder at these posts even though he knows this is a personal space. He knows i tell you guys more and says that he reads it sometimes so he can find out how i feel. He's hounding me again and again and i hate how he can just treat me like this. He's turning into Patrick, and i hate how he's going on and on at me saying im not listenning to me. I dont want to listen to him because he has broken my trust and says that although i tell him things, he wants to know more and more i dont want to be with him anymore. He's really hurt me by spying on me. He wont leave me alone now, i want to be alone and hes going on and on at me. He says i dont care when I do.

I hate how everytime i trust someone they just throw it back in my face. I think I may have to break up with him, i to be honest dont want to be connected to anyone ever again. I want to be alone and just be by myself. Ive managed all these years and now ive had to go and get into a relationship.

ARGHHHh
Siti, tell David how he's hurting you and ask him to give you some space. I'm sure he thinks that he's doing the right thing, but he just needs to understand that you need some time to yourself. I'm sure things will calm down in a few days. :hugs:
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starchild
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Me and David have sorted things out
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jonathan122
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#2157
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#2157
(Original post by starchild)
Me and David have sorted things out
That was quick.

Glad everything's ok.
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Areontas
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#2158
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#2158
(Original post by starchild)
Me and David have sorted things out
Yay, I knew it! - personal space is a valuable thing, and hopefully it won't get in the way of your relationship again anytime soon.
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starchild
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#2159
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#2159
I feel so much better now things are sorted out... sighs
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Not Invented Yet
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Glad you're happier now Siti.

I've just plucked up the courage to talk to one of my best friends about how I've been feeling lately. I had to say it on MSN because I hate confessing things out loud, but she was really nice and understanding. I told her all about going back on the pills and stuff, and although I still feel pretty low, it's nice to know that now someone in real life understands how I feel, and I can always turn to her if I need to.

Luckily this particular friend wasn't so close to me back when I was bad the first time, we've only grown really close over the last year or so, which means that she didn't have to go through all the crap back then - that makes it easier to talk to her about it than one of my older friends who remember last time and would probably be a lot more upset. So it's pretty good and I'm feeling quite loved at the moment, which is nice.

Hope everyone else is alright! xx
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