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    (Original post by SloaneRanger)
    Its not superficial because its already there, its like the kid with the hat, its there, its just a matter of whether its red/blue or whatever colour. Its a statement of fact, he doesn't size up, he isn't lying.
    What are you on about?

    How is judging someone based on how much money they make (that is essentially what a good career is) not superficial?

    If that is a deal breaker for any girl, she is frankly a shallow *****.
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    (Original post by fat_hobbit)
    What are you on about?

    How is judging someone based on how much money they make (that is essentially what a good career is) not superficial?

    If that is a deal breaker for any girl, she is frankly a shallow *****.
    Some people want to know they can afford "milky chai", just like ive been watching in this film "bride and prejudice".
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    (Original post by SloaneRanger)
    Some people want to know they can afford "milky chai", just like ive been watching in this film "bride and prejudice".
    To be honest, when I read **** like this I feel bad for graduates today. I have friends with straight A's who are struggling to break into grad schemes. I know you did, but many are struggling.
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    (Original post by fat_hobbit)
    To be honest, when I read **** like this I feel bad for graduates today. I have friends with straight A's who are struggling to break into grad schemes. I know you did, but many are struggling.
    If you really did get the grades you don't at all. People lie, I learnt the hard way and saw the suffering. Some places handing out pre signing bonus on results day like a few grand. People have it good in 2014 and you can spend it on a girl you like.
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    (Original post by SloaneRanger)
    If you really did get the grades you don't at all. People lie, I learnt the hard way and saw the suffering. Some places handing out pre signing bonus on results day like a few grand. People have it good in 2014 and you can spend it on a girl you like.
    I just said that I have friends with straight A's who are struggling to get onto grad schemes. They don't need to lie.

    1 went to Oxford.

    The other is a law student from a RG.

    The one who went to Oxford, went into self employment later on (unsuccessfully). My RG mate is still struggling, and according to him a lot of his mates with A grades are struggling.

    You need luck, so it's unfair to size people up (especially young people) based on their careers.
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    (Original post by fat_hobbit)
    And no offence to Nomes, but I don't think she has ever known what rejection feels like, or what guys go through when getting girls - which is why she couldn't properly analyse what was going on with the OP. Said it all when she wrote how she friends zoned a guy and then hooked up , meaning she has always been in the position to pick. So in that circumstance, her advice would have caused a lot of emotional trouble for the OP.

    A woman's experience to a man's is so different in the dating game, which is why men should get advice from other men who have experience.
    Completely agree- in this situation, you can only take advice from people with experience and more often than not, a girl's advice would be to appreciate the friendship and stick in there. After rejection, you are kidding yourself if you want to stay 'friends' and are simply putting her needs above your own if you choose to do so.

    I was rejected by a friend and persisted for 2 whole years to salvage something with the girl but looking back, things spiralled downwards the moment I made my real intentions known. Worst part was I cut contact with her and she guilt tripped me into going back to her. She made herself the victim saying she'd lost a friend and I was the one to blame. Soon as we gave the friendship another go, I find out that in the month of zero contact, she'd been sleeping with one of my best mates. We've now gone our own separate ways and I look back thinking how much easier it would have been to walk away straight after the rejection.

    So my advice to the OP- forget about her, move on and you'll find someone better who reciprocates. Never get attached to a girl unless you're going out with her.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by frozen_fire)
    Completely agree- in this situation, you can only take advice from people with experience and more often than not, a girl's advice would be to appreciate the friendship and stick in there. After rejection, you are kidding yourself if you want to stay 'friends' and are simply putting her needs above your own if you choose to do so.
    Women enjoy the validation they get by friends zoning men. Especially those that fancy them. That's why it happens.

    [quote]
    I was rejected by a friend and persisted for 2 whole years to salvage something with the girl but looking back, things spiralled downwards the moment I made my real intentions known. Worst part was I cut contact with her and she guilt tripped me into going back to her. She made herself the victim saying she'd lost a friend and I was the one to blame. Soon as we gave the friendship another go, [/quote[

    As written above.

    You stopped giving her attention, she got pissy with you, so did that.

    Quite selfish and manipulative if you think about it along those lines, but is very common. Sadly.

    The attention is like oxygen for these girls.

    find out that in the month of zero contact, she'd been sleeping with one of my best mates. We've now gone our own separate ways and I look back thinking how much easier it would have been to walk away straight after the rejection.

    So my advice to the OP- forget about her, move on and you'll find someone better who reciprocates. Never get attached to a girl unless you're going out with her.
    Good advice.

    Always best to walk away once you know you have lost the battle. If you find yourself as a guy investing more into the "relationship" than the girl is, you probably have lost the battle.

    She will not sleep with you.

    Basically, in my experience, if the girl is into you, she will find a way to contact you. If on the other hand you send her a message, and she takes AGES to reply, or doesn't reply at all, she probably has lost interest.

    A great way to test if they are into you, is by basically replying to their messages in a closed way. If she is into you, SHE will find a way to continue the conversation. At which point as a guy, you gotta try and get her on a date, before she loses interest. I have also been in situations where for one reason or the other, because I have kept things lingering on for too long, she gets bored, loses interest and moves onto the next guy.

    The start of every interaction with a girl is crucial IMO, especially if she initiates the contact.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Women enjoy the validation they get by friends zoning men. Especially those that fancy them. That's why it happens.

    I was rejected by a friend and persisted for 2 whole years to salvage something with the girl but looking back, things spiralled downwards the moment I made my real intentions known. Worst part was I cut contact with her and she guilt tripped me into going back to her. She made herself the victim saying she'd lost a friend and I was the one to blame. Soon as we gave the friendship another go,
    As written above.

    You stopped giving her attention, she got pissy with you, so did that.

    Quite selfish and manipulative if you think about it along those lines, but is very common. Sadly.

    The attention is like oxygen for these girls.



    Good advice.

    Always best to walk away once you know you have lost the battle. If you find yourself as a guy investing more into the "relationship" than the girl is, you probably have lost the battle.

    She will not sleep with you.

    Basically, in my experience, if the girl is into you, she will find a way to contact you. If on the other hand you send her a message, and she takes AGES to reply, or doesn't reply at all, she probably has lost interest.

    A great way to test if they are into you, is by basically replying to their messages in a closed way. If she is into you, SHE will find a way to continue the conversation. At which point as a guy, you gotta try and get her on a date, before she loses interest. I have also been in situations where for one reason or the other, because I have kept things lingering on for too long, she gets bored, loses interest and moves onto the next guy.

    The start of every interaction with a girl is crucial IMO, especially if she initiates the contact.
    pfff stupid anon
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    OP update me on the situation.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    DM sent
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    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by jam278)
    OP update me on the situation.
    Check your DM's fella.
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    Also intrigued to hear how this panned out in the end.

    Going back to your original post OP, even if face-to-face is a better option than sending her a text....if the girl was genuinely interested, she wouldn't hesitate to text you back the moment you asked her out. Don't blame yourself cos at the end of the day you've made your intentions clear and now at least you know where you stand.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by frozen_fire)
    Also intrigued to hear how this panned out in the end.

    Going back to your original post OP, even if face-to-face is a better option than sending her a text....if the girl was genuinely interested, she wouldn't hesitate to text you back the moment you asked her out. Don't blame yourself cos at the end of the day you've made your intentions clear and now at least you know where you stand.
    Check your DM's mate that was me. lol
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Check your DM's mate that was me. lol
    Why not just post here?
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by ilem)
    Why not just post here?
    those guys i have DM'd know more about whats going on then what i've posted here. well all apart from frozen_fire. lol
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    Hate girls like that. Just reply. Stop being to babyish. Grow some balls.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Dinaa)
    Hate girls like that. Just reply. Stop being to babyish. Grow some balls.
    Often you find out when its too late with girls like this.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Dinaa)
    Hate girls like that. Just reply. Stop being to babyish. Grow some balls.
    that was me who dmd you.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    that was me who dmd you.
    Sorry :lol:
    I'm having a bit of a heart beat problem xD
    So i can't really concentrate 0.o
    But dw i'll reply soon when i'm feelin ok.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Dinaa)
    Sorry :lol:
    I'm having a bit of a heart beat problem xD
    So i can't really concentrate 0.o
    But dw i'll reply soon when i'm feelin ok.
    Im still waiting :P

    Anyway, its been a while and she text me basically saying I don't want to not talk it sucks, so she clearly missed talking to me for a few days, so much so that she text me complaining at my distance.

    Now since then:

    1) She basically asked me what I felt or questions on how I feel. - So I tell her, pour my heart out to her and things were looking good it weren't awkward at all.

    2)Now since her texting back really well (bearing in mind I NEVER initiate contact) it has all of a sudden become really bad at texting back, for no reason what so ever - and she even initiates conversation! WTF! (she has spoken to someone and since talking to that someone her texts have become less frequent. Nice. It seems since people get involved she changes but when its by herself it seems genuine, but this ignoring **** is pissing me off)

    I understand she could be confused and stuff and I got to relax and what have you, but this is pissing me off!
 
 
 
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