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Pakistani Muslims please help.... Muslim girl dating a white guy watch

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    (Original post by Fred5134)
    All of your posts are irrelevant and you spout commands at people based on a supernatural theory with absolutely no evidence behind it at all. It's as retarded as two people discussing the composition of the moon, and a third man walks in and tells them that it's made of cheese and anything to the contrary is irrelevant.
    Dr Fred, perhaps you haven't realised that this is a thread made by a Muslim and asking other Muslims for advice, and others who claim to be Muslim are talking about what Islam teaches regarding issues raised in the OP. Your objections to us believing in God are irrelevant here, so take your bigotry to the Religion section.
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    (Original post by Zamestaneh)
    Dr Fred, perhaps you haven't realised that this is a thread made by a Muslim
    This is not a relevant point. Take your bigotry elsewhere.

    (Original post by Zamestaneh)
    and asking other Muslims for advice, and others who claim to be Muslim are talking about what Islam teaches regarding issues raised in the OP. Your objections to us believing in God are irrelevant here, so take your bigotry to the Religion section.
    Regardless of your attempt to rationalize it, you are attempting to control her sexuality based on something that you cannot prove. Stop pretending to be some sort of an authority on the subject, because you are not. Do something better with your time than trying to dictate what she does with her lady parts, because it is pathetic.
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    (Original post by Josb)
    I wouldn't prevent my children from marrying who they love.
    What if your children wanted to marry a muslim?
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    Goodness me this thread has made me count myself as lucky for having non-religious parents
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    The reason I've put Pakistani Muslims because I believe no one really understands the backward nature of Pakistani culture unless you're in it

    Sorry in advance about the bad spelling/grammar, I'm not the best at writing.

    So I'm 25 years old, have a reputable well paid job, live on my own and I have a white boyfriend. We've been going out for a couple of years now, and I know we both ( if things continue to go really well) are thinking about marriage now.

    The biggest obstacle is my parents who are I own are going to be absolutely devastated- and I really cant stress this enough. To them to marry a BRITISH Pakistani is like - whoa ( if you want a decent a guy you'd marry from back home where you can be truly sure of the persons character). So never mind a white guy.

    My boyfriend - now I know you're going to be skeptical the following because you think I'm in love so can't see any bad, believe me I can but this guy, is 1 in a million. A kind, intelligent, 'good hearted' type of guy. I know I'm very lucky to have found someone like him, and the thought of letting him go is unbearable.


    I love my family I really do, and my parents are kind people but its been ingrained in them that family honour within the community is extremely
    important. And I know they love me as well, but I KNOW they would rather I married no one than a white guy. And that to me is unimaginable because all I've every wanted is a family of my own. I wouldnt be just losing my parents, but my relatives and religious Muslim friends as well

    I would like advice from other Asians who have seen or experienced themselves how it all pans out if the couple marry regardless of their parents view. Do the parents eventually come round ?

    Sorry this has been a bit of a rant.
    Basically I've met an amazing guy whom I want to marry but I don't want to lose family. What do I do....
    I suggest your bf buys a long "Live blade" Katana and learns to swing it properly before you tell your parents. Would hate to see another innocent girl brutally murdered for bringing dishonor on their primitive parents
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    Drama going on. :cookie:
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    (Original post by tammie123)
    What if your children wanted to marry a muslim?
    I would be disappointed, but I wouldn't force them not to do it. If they are happy that way...
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    (Original post by Josb)
    I would be disappointed, but I wouldn't force them not to do it. If they are happy that way...
    Thats what most muslim parents would do if their children wanted to marry non muslims, mine would be like that too
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    (Original post by tammie123)
    Thats what most muslim parents would do if their children wanted to marry non muslims, mine would be like that too
    I beg to differ. Read the OP and Muslims' answers to it, as well as countless other similar threads.
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    Follow your instinct and do what you want to do regardless of what your parents.

    Take your chance in my honest opinion and give it your best shot- that is the best option for both your internal happiness against an unhappy bitter life where your mother and father confine you and beat you into misery.

    Don't be put off by the archaic advice of the various Muslims on here. You are old and enough and mature to determine your own faith (if any) and decide whether your personal beliefs will or should have any effect on your future relationship.

    PM if you want to talk
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    (Original post by Josb)
    I beg to differ. Read the OP and Muslims' answers to it, as well as countless other similar threads.
    So what exactly do you think muslim parents would do then? I've come across alot of muslims in my life
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    (Original post by tammie123)
    Thats what most muslim parents would do if their children wanted to marry non muslims, mine would be like that too
    No they wouldn't.

    I, at the very least, can see that even if some of the non-Muslims here, fooled by the relentless propaganda that British Muslims are generally a tolerant lot, can't.
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    (Original post by Asiangirl_18)
    Soz my bad I should have said most. Because that's how it is. There will literally be the smallest Muslim minority who will allow this kinda stuff. If u look in Chinese and that part of Asia, their culture is traditionally all about respect and honour. Lose that and ur life is not worth living. The same ethics are in place for most Muslims.
    You're pretty much endorsing such behaviour by actively trying to prevent the actions of those trying to take a stand against it and break the norm.

    Interracial relationships in the mid-20th century America come to mind.
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    (Original post by Asiangirl_18)
    Is it stigmatising when the religion is only forewarning u of the consequences that will happen if u go down a certain path? If God wanted to, we could all be absolutely subservient and follow his every commander yet he has allowed us that freedom to choose but the Quran has been given to us like what the Book of Laws is for England and other countries. It's there to try and protect u from all harm but stray from it and so be it, then deal with the consequences. In a very basic and harsh way this is what these rule books whether religious or not are made for. What's wrong in that?
    So we have free will because the boss says we do?
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    (Original post by Inzamam99)
    No they wouldn't.

    I, at the very least, can see that even if some of the non-Muslims here, fooled by the relentless propaganda that British Muslims are generally a tolerant lot, can't.
    I'm assuming you're an ex muslim? Well even if you are you can't really generalise how all muslims would be like in this situation based on the muslims you've come across and to be honest I don't think you can generalise based on my experience either. I've mostly come across bengali muslims
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    (Original post by tammie123)
    I'm assuming you're an ex muslim? Well even if you are you can't really generalise how all muslims would be like in this situation based on the muslims you've come across and to be honest I don't think you can generalise based on my experience either. I've mostly come across bengali muslims
    I am certainly not generalising based on limited experience or bias. It is, unfortunately, hard cold fact. Most of my friends are practising Muslims and 4 to date have been through exactly the same thing. Two have been disowned outright by their families and the other two were initially shunned but are now on speaking terms again. This is despite the "goris" in question being Muslim. If that were not the case, then the situation complicates even more.

    I also volunteer for a charity called Karma Nirvana which concentrates on issues such as forced marriages, rape etc within the Asian community. Even in my limited here, I have come across some astounding cases. Instances of 16 year old girls who are self harming because their parents are forcing them into a marriage. Of ex-Muslims who have been beaten and ostracised by their parents. Of countless interracial and inter-religious marriages where families have reacted terribly.

    The generally regressive attitude of the British Muslim community is hard, cold fact. Quite frankly, there is little point polishing a turd- the only way to deal with these situations and improve is introspection and debate, not burying your head in your sand and denying they exist or underplaying them to make your community look good
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    (Original post by IdeasForLife)
    This comes down to whether you value Allah over him or not. Honestly believe me marrying him isn't worth it. You'll wreck your dunya and your akhirah. Your marriage wouldn't count Islamically and you'll be committing zina.
    Well said. Personally I think the girl is selfish and cannot really call herself a Muslim given her actions.
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    (Original post by Inzamam99)
    I am certainly not generalising based on limited experience or bias. It is, unfortunately, hard cold fact. Most of my friends are practising Muslims and 4 to date have been through exactly the same thing. Two have been disowned outright by their families and the other two were initially shunned but are now on speaking terms again. This is despite the "goris" in question being Muslim. If that were not the case, then the situation complicates even more.

    I also volunteer for a charity called Karma Nirvana which concentrates on issues such as forced marriages, rape etc within the Asian community. Even in my limited here, I have come across some astounding cases. Instances of 16 year old girls who are self harming because their parents are forcing them into a marriage. Of ex-Muslims who have been beaten and ostracised by their parents. Of countless interracial and inter-religious marriages where families have reacted terribly.

    The generally regressive attitude of the British Muslim community is hard, cold fact. Quite frankly, there is little point polishing a turd- the only way to deal with these situations and improve is introspection and debate, not burying your head in your sand and denying they exist or underplaying them to make your community look good
    That is a terrible thing to say. They have kept their cultural integrity and it is a matter in which they don't want to integrate into the mainstream British culture with. That is fine. They pay their taxes, they don't really cause trouble, leave them alone.
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    (Original post by Inzamam99)
    I am certainly not generalising based on limited experience or bias. It is, unfortunately, hard cold fact. Most of my friends are practising Muslims and 4 to date have been through exactly the same thing. Two have been disowned outright by their families and the other two were initially shunned but are now on speaking terms again. This is despite the "goris" in question being Muslim. If that were not the case, then the situation complicates even more.

    I also volunteer for a charity called Karma Nirvana which concentrates on issues such as forced marriages, rape etc within the Asian community. Even in my limited here, I have come across some astounding cases. Instances of 16 year old girls who are self harming because their parents are forcing them into a marriage. Of ex-Muslims who have been beaten and ostracised by their parents. Of countless interracial and inter-religious marriages where families have reacted terribly.

    The generally regressive attitude of the British Muslim community is hard, cold fact. Quite frankly, there is little point polishing a turd- the only way to deal with these situations and improve is introspection and debate, not burying your head in your sand and denying they exist or underplaying them to make your community look good
    No I understand what you're saying there are alot of problems in the asian community that do need to be addressed but thats a cultural problem and not a religious one. There are alot of asian values which I really don't agree with and I agree we need to be honest about them so we can find solutions.
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    (Original post by tammie123)
    No I understand what you're saying there are alot of problems in the asian community that do need to be addressed but thats a cultural problem and not a religious one. There are alot of asian values which I really don't agree with and I agree we need to be honest about them so we can find solutions.
    No, it is actually a combination of both. The way that apostates should be treated is emphasised in some detail in the Sahih Hadith for example. Hidden problem that it may be- you have absolutely no idea of the hordes of Muslims within the UK alone who are losing their faith and the incredible misery they have to undergo.
 
 
 
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