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    (Original post by tinktinktinkerbell)
    well lets face it its not the guy that has to go through it


    i cant speak for the other girls on here but i am the least maternal person ever hense me never having kids and its nowt to do with my career (i dont have one, i have a job instead) or my waistline (thats already shot to ****) not all girls are maternal and more and more girls seem to be turning away from having kids
    I, dispite popular belief, can read just fine. Bold lettering does not make your point any less ridiculous.

    I realise that childbirth is painful etc, and i will never experience that pain. A little something called empathy allows me to understand it though. Anything that you go through is no excuse to deny potential life. If you think that scraping the life growing inside you out is justified by how inconvinient it is then you must be a rather selfish person.

    Also, not being "maternal" is not a good reason to have an abortion. Its a good reason for laparoscopy.
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    (Original post by CB91)
    The father has a right too. And if its her body, then she should have used some contraception. It's really not that hard.
    I completely agree that the father should - in a normal situation - have a right. If I got pregnant the first thing I would do would be to talk to my boyfriend. However, firstly their relationship was over and secondly he's been violent, controlling and threatening to her.

    Although I think it is important to have the consent of the father when bringing a child into the world - I think it's unacceptable that girls can just go "it's my body, I want this baby so you're just going to have to pay me alimony and/or be a father" - I think it is absolutely ridiculous to even think that the father should have any right to say "you're pregnant with my child and I want it so therefore you have to have it". At the end of the day it's the woman who has to carry it for 9 months, breastfeed afterwards and more often than not bring up the child.

    And I agree with the contraception thing, but mistakes do happen and they're both at fault for it, not just her. If people are having sex, then they should be able to jointly discuss contraception and what to do if a pregnancy does happen really.
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    (Original post by xSkyFire)
    It's what happens when you have "equal rights" :p:
    It's ironic since they still want the special treatment for everything else tbh
    Yeah totally. After checking out Sheila's Wheels i'm considering a sex change. :p:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    to be honest she killed his cells. its not as if she took a gun to an actual living person whos in the world.
    I said "to him". If he's anti-abortion that's how he sees it.
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    (Original post by Bslforever)
    I, dispite popular belief, can read just fine. Bold lettering does not make your point any less ridiculous.

    I realise that childbirth is painful etc, and i will never experience that pain. A little something called empathy allows me to understand it though. Anything that you go through is no excuse to deny potential life. If you think that scraping the life growing inside you out is justified by how inconvinient it is then you must be a rather selfish person.

    Also, not being "maternal" is not a good reason to have an abortion. Its a good reason for laparoscopy.

    yes i am a very selfish person, one of the reasons i dont want to have a child

    and of course not being maternal is a good reason, its better than having a baby you dont want, would resent etc
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    (Original post by Bslforever)
    Also, not being "maternal" is not a good reason to have an abortion. Its a good reason for laparoscopy.
    I don't suppose you know what laparoscopy is, do you? What a strange suggestion to make. :rofl:
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    (Original post by tinktinktinkerbell)
    yes i am a very selfish person, one of the reasons i dont want to have a child

    and of course not being maternal is a good reason, its better than having a baby you dont want, would resent etc
    I'll break my last comment down for you. Not being maternal is not a good reason for abortion.

    It is a good reason for a woman getting herself "the snip" as you referred to it as before. And using protection for that matter.
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    (Original post by Pink Bullets)
    I don't suppose you know what laparoscopy is, do you? What a strange suggestion to make. :rofl:
    Am i wrong? I thought it was a type of keyhole surgery used in the tying of the fallopian tubes (amongst other things i suppose).

    ...I could well be wrong come to think of it

    Actually no, Laparoscopic Sterilisation is the most common way to perform the procedure known as getting your "tubes tied". Had me worried for a second there
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    (Original post by Melting Sugar.)
    I said "to him". If he's anti-abortion that's how he sees it.
    You can do the mature thing of tell him beforehand with someone else in the room for safety and discuss , because shock horror, people change there minds, he might make her realise she wanted it really or the other way around. And then she could make her decision.

    Or she could do the immature thing like she did and then wonder why hes pissed off, which I would be.
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    (Original post by Bslforever)
    I'll break my last comment down for you. Not being maternal is not a good reason for abortion.

    It is a good reason for a woman getting herself "the snip" as you referred to it as before. And using protection for that matter.
    and i'll say again, yes it is and once again 'the snip' isnt 100% effective nor is any other protection

    i for one will not be screwing with my body by getting the snip
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    (Original post by tinktinktinkerbell)
    and i'll say again, yes it is and once again 'the snip' isnt 100% effective nor is any other protection

    i for one will not be screwing with my body by getting the snip
    Used in combination with contraception, it might as well be 100%. It can also be reversed.

    I don't see how it is screwing with your body. It just sorts out a part that you never ever want to use. Kinda like an appendectomy

    EDIT: What i'm saying is that if anything (and i don't condone this at all) abortion should be seen as the last resort. People like you seem to have the attitude that you use the protection that you want, and if you get pregnant, its no big deal to just head on down to the abortion clinic.
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    (Original post by Bslforever)
    Am i wrong? I thought it was a type of keyhole surgery used in the tying of the fallopian tubes (amongst other things i suppose).

    ...I could well be wrong come to think of it
    It's keyhole surgery done through the abdomen with the aid of a camera. I suppose it could be used to tie fallopian tubes... but what you said was very non-specific, it could have meant any kind of surgery done with a camera! In this context, from what I can tell, it's normally used to diagnose infertility in women.


    I don't see how it is screwing with your body. It just sorts out a part that you never ever want to use. Kinda like an appendectomy
    Except the only reason anyone would get an appendectomy is if they were suffering from appendicitis. Generally, people tend to avoid unnecessary surgery...
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    (Original post by Bslforever)
    Used in combination with contraception, it might as well be 100%. It can also be reversed.

    I don't see how it is screwing with your body. It just sorts out a part that you never ever want to use. Kinda like an appendectomy

    'might as well be 100%' doesnt = 100% :rolleyes:

    and of course its screwing with my body its having an op for no good reason for a start
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Ok so in a situation and I don’t know what to do.

    A couple of months ago I found out I was pregnant and immediately aborted it without a second thought. There is no way I can have a baby at this stage of my life and I never plan to have a baby ever – I’m not a maternal women.

    I didn’t consult the ex as I knew he would force me to keep it (I broke up with him straight after I found out I was pregnant)

    Some history on me and the ex:
    We’ve been on/off for 5 years. He is way more attached to me than I to him. As much as I love him I have problems in holding down a relationship – fears of commitment and abandonment which I can’t be bothered to go in detail – most of all our problems in the relationship stem from me e.g some months I would be ok and things would ok between us then I would leave him out of the blue as I felt I was being smothered and needed space. He is a very loving man and says I am “the one” he will marry and that he wont stop – emotional ******** like that puts me off im not a lovey dovey person - he has on more than one occasion proposed but I always run away as I cant be bothered with all this commitment **** . He’s always complaining that I’m dead and cold-hearted.

    Anyway a couple of days ago I found my ex had broken in to my flat after he found (I still don’t know how – I told no one) out about the abortion. I come home to find him sitting in my living room. He immediately started screaming profanities at me calling me evil for aborting his baby, and what kind of mother I was etc.
    When I tried to argue my case he started punching the walls and smashing everything in the room the TV, the chairs, just everything - I got really frightened so I ran in my bedroom and locked the door.
    I could hear him screaming at me “we could have made it work” “why didn’t you tell me” “you killed my baby”

    After a few hours of him hysterically crying, screaming profanities and trying to break my bedroom door he had calmed down and asked me to open the door so we could talk properly and he would promise not to lose his temper on me – I still was pretty shaken up and was too scared to open the door so I asked him to leave which after a while he did.

    Anyway now I’m really scared as I don’t know what he will do. I know I was wrong not to tell him but I know what he is like and he would’ve forced me to keep it which is a no-no for me. He has a history of doing stupid things as he is (actually we both are) eccentric people e.g at one point he tied me up to the bed post to stop me from leaving him – very stupid very dumb stuff.

    I have heard anything from him for a few days but I have a feeling something will happen in the next few days. What shall I do?

    I hope you live with the fact that you're a child killer for the rest of your life. You boyfriend has every right to be angry. It takes two for a relationship and that trust broke the moment you went behind his back.
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    (Original post by Pink Bullets)
    It's keyhole surgery done through the abdomen with the aid of a camera. I suppose it could be used to tie fallopian tubes... but what you said was very non-specific, it could have meant any kind of surgery done with a camera! In this context, from what I can tell, it's normally used to diagnose infertility in women.
    Sorry for the late edit of my last post. Yeah, i suppose i was a little vauge, but the most common form of "tying the tubes" is through laparoscopic sterilisation.
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    (Original post by tinktinktinkerbell)
    'might as well be 100%' doesnt = 100% :rolleyes:

    and of course its screwing with my body its having an op for no good reason for a start
    See the edit on my last post. I have no right to judge you, especially not from across the internet, but you sound like a terrible person. You seem to think that as abortion and abstinence are the only 100% ways of preventing childbirth (and you sure as hell dont wanna stop screwing), you're going to forget about contraception, as its not 100% and just use abortion clinics as a super-powerful condom.

    You must realise that this is immoral on several levels.

    If you feel that this isn't accurate, im just going on the posts that you have made. I don't actually know you so im not pretending to have made any judgement about you.
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    (Original post by Bslforever)
    I, dispite popular belief, can read just fine. Bold lettering does not make your point any less ridiculous.

    Clearly can't spell just fine, despite popular belief. And I don't think bold lettering will make my point any less ridiculous, either.
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    Right. I realise that a lot of people have pointed out that the abortion was OP's choice and hers alone because it was her body. I don't want to generalise, but a lot of people that objected to this seemed to be male. While it is hurtful, both partners do NOT have equal say in whether to continue with a pregnancy because it will always, always (or at least until tremendous scientific advances occur) be reliant on a woman's body.

    But seeing as everyone likes to conjure up hypothetical what ifs (what if the man slipped the woman an abortion pill, etc), let me remind you of a real life scenario as close to this as possible.

    You may remember a case in which a woman undergoing cancer treatment and her partner created embryos before the treatment rendered her infertile. They subsequently broke up, and he denied her permission to have these embryos, which they both created, implanted in her and carried to term because he did not want a child with her any more. Did he 'kill' his baby? It was a terrible tragedy for the woman, and if the embryos were already inside her, he would not have been able to make this decision. But they weren't. No actual (as opposed to potential) human life was involved in this decision, so this decision was, in my opinion, heartbreaking but fair.

    But, for my two cents, if a potential human being is dependent on an human being (the woman), the person whose humanity is undebatable always gets to call the shots. And I wouldn't have the arrogance or lack of empathy (which everyone keeps spouting on about) to call someone who's had to make such an awful decision the horrible names that have been posted on here. As another poster rightly put it, do what you have to do to get through it.
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    (Original post by Bslforever)
    See the edit on my last post. I have no right to judge you, especially not from across the internet, but you sound like a terrible person. You seem to think that as abortion and abstinence are the only 100% ways of preventing childbirth (and you sure as hell dont wanna stop screwing), you're going to forget about contraception, as its not 100% and just use abortion clinics as a super-powerful condom.

    You must realise that this is immoral on several levels.

    If you feel that this isn't accurate, im just going on the posts that you have made. I don't actually know you so im not pretending to have made any judgement about you.

    FYI i actually dont want a baby that much that im actually not and never planning on having sex so your assumptions about me are way off the mark
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    (Original post by Static_Meteorite)
    I hope you live with the fact that you're a child killer for the rest of your life. You boyfriend has every right to be angry. It takes two for a relationship and that trust broke the moment you went behind his back.
    She's not in a relationship with him. She chose not to be in a relationship with him. She seems to have no desire to be in a relationship with him. Lack of trust is a non-issue in a non-relationship.
 
 
 
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