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How do girls feel about being approached in the street? Watch

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    (Original post by Ade9000)
    Ahh. There it is. It's only bad when MEN do it. I get it now.
    There is truth that there is a degree of unpredictability with men and their reactions to being turned down. That's what makes the whole thing uncomfortable. Usually the types of guys who approach me in the street aren't the ones I'm attracted to so it's just horrible for all involved. I have been sexually assaulted twice (albeit at night) in full public with my friends around (who didnt see at the time as it was fairly quick) from guys who couldn't take the rejection. It's a bit concerning that some on this thread openly DO NOT care and put their uncontrollable libidos ahead of the other party's wellbeing.
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    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    Your advice was to give an uninvited complement to a complete stranger, which is sexual harassment.
    I don't believe we live in a world as sad as that. :hand:
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    Western culture doesn't adopt the arranged marriage. So someone has to make the first move, and clearly women aren't going to be the ones to do it.

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    (Original post by Ade9000)
    Ahh. There it is. It's only bad when MEN do it. I get it now.
    Sadly, I don't think you do.
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    (Original post by miser)
    I don't believe we live in a world as sad as that. :hand:

    Have a look at the everyday sexism project if you don't believe me when I say that unwanted and uninvited sexual approaches from strange men leave thousands of women everyday feeling uncomfortable and unsafe in their own cities.

    If you're one of these men, please stop. Your actions have consequences.
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    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    Have a look at the everyday sexism project if you don't believe me when I say that unwanted and uninvited sexual approaches from strange men leave thousands of women everyday feeling uncomfortable and unsafe in their own cities.

    If you're one of these men, please stop. Your actions have consequences.
    I've had a look at their website and I read the entire first page of stories but nothing about getting an uninvited compliment. There seems no obvious way to find the content you are referencing.
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    I usually find it uncomfortable because it puts you on the spot and I feel pressured to give them my number. I have had this happen before and some men have gotten aggressive if I said no. I had to resort to give a fake number once because this guy would not leave me alone and was in my face, but he then preceded to try and hold me still while he rang it to check that it was real. I managed to get away in the end but it was still frightening. The thing is you never know what the guy who is approaching you is like and how they may react if you possibly say no.
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    (Original post by Eveiebaby)
    There is truth that there is a degree of unpredictability with men and their reactions to being turned down. That's what makes the whole thing uncomfortable. Usually the types of guys who approach me in the street aren't the ones I'm attracted to so it's just horrible for all involved. I have been sexually assaulted twice (albeit at night) in full public with my friends around (who didnt see at the time as it was fairly quick) from guys who couldn't take the rejection. It's a bit concerning that some on this thread openly DO NOT care and put their uncontrollable libidos ahead of the other party's wellbeing.
    I understand and I'm terribly sorry that you've experienced sexual assault. But let me ask you this: if the man took your declination and went his way, would you turn to your friends and say, 'I was just sexually harassed'?

    As for people's well-being, I'm promoting that it be taken into consideration. Reading signals and understanding when to let go. Even some of the posters who are women have made similar statements. As long as you do it respectfully and know that 'no' means 'end of discussion' then there's no problem.

    But what I'm guessing from cole-slaw is that while it's harassment when men do it, if a women approaches me on the street, it isn't.
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    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    Sadly, I don't think you do.
    Really? Please elaborate?
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    I find the concept of someone walking up to me randomly and approaching me on the street awkward and a little bit scary. I'd probably think they're a bit weird.

    I would never give my number to someone I don't know- I'd add them on facebook and probably get to know them on there if I wanted to, but I wouldn't give a stranger my number.
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    (Original post by Ade9000)
    Really? Please elaborate?
    The fact that when girls come on this thread and tell them that that is EXACTLY how they feel when approached by a sexual predator, you feel the need to harangue and belittle them, says everything we need to know about your attitude towards women.
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    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    The fact that when girls come on this thread and tell them that that is EXACTLY how they feel when approached by a sexual predator, you feel the need to harangue and belittle them, says everything we need to know about your attitude towards women.
    Wow. How on earth am I belittling their experiences? Show me where. Really. Some of the women on this thread have even stated that they don't mind as long you know when to disengage, how come you don't challenge them?

    I think you're just misguided and sexist at that too. You elaborated on your previous point about women approach men on the streets.
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    (Original post by Ade9000)
    Wow. How on earth am I belittling their experiences? Show me where. Really. Some of the women on this thread have even stated that they don't mind as long you know when to disengage, how come you don't challenge them?

    I think you're just misguided and sexist at that too. You elaborated on your previous point about women approach men on the streets.
    Every woman who has posted on this thread, you have quoted and basically told her she's wrong, she doesn't know what she's talking about, her opinions and invalid and don't matter.

    You're a dreadful misogynist, actively trying to silence women and prevent them from talking up against sexual harassment. You need to seek professional help.
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    (Original post by miser)
    I've had a look at their website and I read the entire first page of stories but nothing about getting an uninvited compliment. There seems no obvious way to find the content you are referencing.
    Just look at all the women that have posted on this thread and expressed their discomfort at the thought of being approached by a stranger. Don't their opinions mean anything to you?
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    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    Just look at all the women that have posted on this thread and expressed their discomfort at the thought of being approached by a stranger. Don't their opinions mean anything to you?
    If you've seen anything other than mixed views from different girls with different opinions while reading this thread, you've been selectively reading in preference of your existing view point.
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    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    Every woman who has posted on this thread, you have quoted and basically told her she's wrong, she doesn't know what she's talking about, her opinions and invalid and don't matter.

    You're a dreadful misogynist, actively trying to silence women and prevent them from talking up against sexual harassment. You need to seek professional help.
    No I haven't. I've only replied to those who have quoted me directly. See for yourself. And I simply posed the question: If he took your declination and moved on, would you go to your friends and say 'I was sexually harassed'? That shows interest in opinions, which you apparently can't see.

    I'm a misogynist? No, mate. You are blinded by your own arrogance and belief that you're actually helping these women (which you're not).

    And you still haven't elaborated on my previous point. I'm still waiting...
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    (Original post by strawberrysnow)
    If you were around my age and you were hot (or just decently-looking), I'd be flattered. If not, please don't approach me because I would be kinda creeped out...
    At least someone here has admitted the truth.

    Most girls I know view it this way too.
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    (Original post by Advanced Subsidiary)
    At least someone here has admitted the truth.

    Most girls I know view it this way too.
    Thank you! And exactly!
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    (Original post by miser)
    If you've seen anything other than mixed views from different girls with different opinions while reading this thread, you've been selectively reading in preference of your existing view point.
    I have seen mixed views, this is true. I don't deny this.

    But that's not the point. The point is that it is impossible for you to tell at a glance which camp a stranger in the street falls into before you approach, so you have no way of knowing you're not about to harass them.

    Therefore, don't do it.

    I don't see how this is even a discussion. If there is even a small chance that your actions might cause someone distress, you'd have to be a thoughtless prick to go through with it.
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    I don't really like it and wouldn't give my number to a stranger. I had a guy sit next to me just to talk to me a few weeks ago and I found it a little bit uncomfortable but I was polite and I spoke to him, but I made my excuses to leave after a few minutes. He asked me for a hug before I went though Had to politely let him down but it was really awkward!
 
 
 
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