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A Basic Men's Guide to Success with Women Watch

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    (Original post by dgeorge)
    It's not just about NOT doing the wrong things, it's also about doing the right things.

    I may not be flashing cash and throwing compliments left right and center, but doesn't mean I'll be any better at attracting the opposite sex
    Yes, but if you're so socially awkward around girls that you can't even talk them properly then you're not doing the right thing.

    Off topic, but are you from Antigua or Barbuda?

    (Original post by Mankytoes)
    I was referring to you saying "It just generally means not being a ****."

    But this is meant to be advice for guys who are trying to get "something in return". The aim is for more than the girl to have a nice conversation (though she will enjoy the conversation a lot if you succeed in using PUA tactics).
    Yes, but if you have trouble even talking to a girl, why would you expect to get much further than that?

    But you have to convey that attractive part of your personality- or, even better, expand it. Or, if you don't have it, fake it. But the conveying is often the hard part. It isn't easy to show, in a short period of time, what a fun, interesting, exciting, desirable person you are.
    Which is why you should get used to just talking to girls normally. That way you don't have to work to convey your personality, it's just there for all to see.


    True, but some people find it very hard to talk about themselves. How do I convey how intelligent I am quite quickly without seeming boastful, or a know-it-all, or boring her? That isn't that easy, which is why the little tricks you can learn can be very effective.
    You get used to talking to us like normal human beings. You learn what bores people, what interests people etc by talking to people.

    Of course, you have to try to work the girl out as well. Some girls seem to react really well to you making little jokes at them (my favourite was taking the piss out of where they're from), whereas others will tell you to **** off.
    Your successful approach leads to girls telling you to **** off :lolwut:
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    (Original post by Mankytoes)
    You should treat them with a basic respect, but most women don't sexually respond to be treated really respectfully, like buying them drinks, constantly complimenting them, etc. I know it's nice to think that being really nice to women all the time is the best tactic, but that isn't reality, otherwise these tactics would never had been formulated in the first place. I think most guys start off being really nice to women, find that fails, and then turn to things like PUA.

    You don't act like a "total prick", you're creating a false dichotomy, you don't have to either treat them like a queen or treat them like ****. You treat the well, but make them a little bit insecure as well, make sure you look desirable and confident.
    Respectfully does not imply buying them drinks and complementing them. You need to google "respect".

    MOST guys don't need to turn to thinks like PUA because they're not socially incompetent halfwits.
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    I'll need this, especially for someone who went to an all boys school for the entire life...
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    (Original post by Mankytoes)
    I know, if you quoted the whole sentence instead of taking a small part of it out of context you'd get that impression too... seriously, why do people do that? It makes no sense to me. It isn't like people can't just read what I actually wrote anyway.

    What I was saying is, you're right in that treating them as equals, rather than superiors is a good tactic (though being slightly condescending in the right way can be even better), and one that a lot of guys miss, BUT a lot of people do this, but still have problems, because they aren't flirting. They also might not be coming across as confident or interesting, because their body language is poor, they are being too self deprecating, or they are asking bad, closed questions. Basically, my point is you're on the right lines but you're oversimplifying it, and saying that things that work don't, because you find them unsavoury. It's fair enough to not like them, but it's lying to say they don't work.
    Tactic? Seriously? You're still falling into the trap of thinking about women like its some kind of military campaign, rather than a natural social interaction.

    The methods you suggest work well enough to get a complete no hoper a chance of scoring with a lot of hard work. But you know what works 100 x better? Just being a normal guy.
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    (Original post by rlw31)

    Yes, but if you have trouble even talking to a girl, why would you expect to get much further than that?

    Which is why you should get used to just talking to girls normally. That way you don't have to work to convey your personality, it's just there for all to see.

    You get used to talking to us like normal human beings. You learn what bores people, what interests people etc by talking to people.

    Your successful approach leads to girls telling you to **** off :lolwut:
    You have to start somewhere, anyone can learn how to talk to women. You won't get laid the first time, but you will eventually.

    Sorry, but that just isn't true for a lot of people, I think when a lot of people just start talking to a stranger normally, they totally fail to project their true personality.

    I wish it was that easy, but it isn't. It isn't the same as just talking to people in a different environment. You don't talk the same way to your family as you do to your friends, you talk differently at work than you do at a nightclub.

    Ha, only occasionally. Once a girl went psycho at me when I told her Lewes was the most boring town I'd ever been to. You can't let it put you off though, overall it's a good tactic.
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    (Original post by dgeorge)
    So knowing what to do to become attractive is manipulative?

    :confused:

    If so, I'm pretty damn happy being "manipulative", along with the other 98% of the worlds population who are attractive enough to find a partner at one time of their lives or another



    No it is called "learning" One isn't born confident, or intelligent (two important ways to become attractive) but one can learn these traits or knowledge to become attractive.

    Attraction isn't about "fooling" anyone, it's about building the skills and knowledge necessary to be able to convey/carry out certain social behaviour (confidence, being an interesting person etc) which will make you more attractive.


    Yes it is. Attraction comes from a set of characteristics that can easily be gained or lost, both intentionally and unintentionally
    Most people don't THINK about what makes them attractive at all, they just are. I certainly never did, its only now I've looked back and asked "why WAS I so successful compared to a lot of my friends" that I've realised the things that confident sociable guys naturally do.
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    (Original post by rlw31)
    Yes, but if you're so socially awkward around girls that you can't even talk them properly then you're not doing the right thing.

    Off topic, but are you from Antigua or Barbuda?



    Yes, but if you have trouble even talking to a girl, why would you expect to get much further than that?



    Which is why you should get used to just talking to girls normally. That way you don't have to work to convey your personality, it's just there for all to see.




    You get used to talking to us like normal human beings. You learn what bores people, what interests people etc by talking to people.



    Your successful approach leads to girls telling you to **** off :lolwut:
    Yes, but if you're so socially awkward around girls that you can't even talk them properly then you're not doing the right thing.
    Agreed

    Off topic, but are you from Antigua or Barbuda?
    Yes I am
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    (Original post by py0alb)
    Respectfully does not imply buying them drinks and complementing them. You need to google "respect".

    MOST guys don't need to turn to thinks like PUA because they're not socially incompetent halfwits.
    I've already addressed that.

    And a lot of them aren't sexually satisfied. Honestly, this hostility is ridiculous. I was very unsuccessful with women, I learnt a few things and it helped me a lot, helped me get my long term girlfriend, so now I'm sharing this advice with people like me. You want to look down on me, that's fine, I'm happy, like a lot of guys who've improved themselves.

    I'm sure you'd say the same to a girl who reads magazines which say things like "10 tips to bag the man of your dreams"...

    (Original post by Seatbelt)
    I'll need this, especially for someone who went to an all boys school for the entire life...
    Ha yeah, just get talking to girls, not having that experience is a ****ter.

    (Original post by py0alb)
    Tactic? Seriously? You're still falling into the trap of thinking about women like its some kind of military campaign, rather than a natural social interaction.

    The methods you suggest work well enough to get a complete no hoper a chance of scoring with a lot of hard work. But you know what works 100 x better? Just being a normal guy.
    Oh yeah, the word tactic is only used in the context of a military campaign. Look, this is what it is, it isn't the coolest thing to do, but it works, it helps people.

    You're wrong. Just being a normal guy isn't enough. Why would a girl who gets loads of attention get with "just a normal guy"? Your ideas sound like common sense, but they don't withstand scrutiny, and I know from trying them they don't work.
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    (Original post by Mankytoes)

    You're wrong. Just being a normal guy isn't enough. Why would a girl who gets loads of attention get with "just a normal guy"? Your ideas sound like common sense, but they don't withstand scrutiny, and I know from trying them they don't work.
    Yes, probably because the normal guy is the only one not clumsily hitting on her like a clueless chump. That in itself is an extremely attractive quality.

    I really do feel sorry for guys who have such low self respect that they think simply being themselves isn't going to be enough to pull even the most attractive girl in the club, and they have to put on some kind of phony act.
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    (Original post by py0alb)
    Most people don't THINK about what makes them attractive at all, they just are. I certainly never did, its only now I've looked back and asked "why WAS I so successful compared to a lot of my friends" that I've realised the things that confident sociable guys naturally do.
    Most people don't THINK about what makes them attractive at all, they just are
    All social interaction is learnt. If I wiped your head clear of all memories, you wouldn't suddenly "know" how to speak to a woman

    Sure, LOTS of information is learned subconsciously, such as by observation, where you do not have to be officially "taught" what to do.

    For some people, they can easily emulate a dance without practicing, just by observing and replicating. They may even take portions of moves from others and add in/subtract to make a new move.

    There are others who can't, who need actual practice and repetition to do so. Just because YOU can do it doesn't mean everyone else can, and it doesn't make you better/worse than someone who may have had to intentionally go through the process of being taught.

    Your argument that consciously trying to learn behaviour is somehow less genuine than unconsciously learned behaviour is extremely flawed. Me learning how to drive without being taught and without having to think about it is no more genuine than someone who does have to be taught and does have to think about it.

    After a while, the object is to reach unconscious competence - where you can execute the behaviour without thinking about it, without trying, and where it is part of your automatic behaviour
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    (Original post by py0alb)
    Yes, probably because the normal guy is the only one not clumsily hitting on her like a clueless chump. That in itself is an extremely attractive quality.

    I really do feel sorry for guys who have such low self respect that they think simply being themselves isn't going to be enough to pull even the most attractive girl in the club, and they have to put on some kind of phony act.
    You seem to think that somehow learning how to deal with persons is "phony". You're wrong. It's no more phony than putting on a good pair of shoes or wearing cologne when going out
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    (Original post by dgeorge)
    All social interaction is learnt. If I wiped your head clear of all memories, you wouldn't suddenly "know" how to speak to a woman

    Sure, LOTS of information is learned subconsciously, such as by observation, where you do not have to be officially "taught" what to do.

    For some people, they can easily emulate a dance without practicing, just by observing and replicating. They may even take portions of moves from others and add in/subtract to make a new move.

    There are others who can't, who need actual practice and repetition to do so. Just because YOU can do it doesn't mean everyone else can, and it doesn't make you better/worse than someone who may have had to intentionally go through the process of being taught.

    Your argument that consciously trying to learn behaviour is somehow less genuine than unconsciously learned behaviour is extremely flawed. Me learning how to drive without being taught and without having to think about it is no more genuine than someone who does have to be taught and does have to think about it.

    After a while, the object is to reach unconscious competence - where you can execute the behaviour without thinking about it, without trying, and where it is part of your automatic behaviour
    Alright, so lets follow this line of thought: say you need to emulate someone else and practice socialising with women.

    Who should you emulate: someone who was naturally successful at it and effortlessly breezed through their 20s withe a constant stream of girlfriends, **** buddies and dates lined up without ever having to even actually try to pull, or someone else who was equally as incompetent as you, and has to work really hard memorising routines and techniques just to get a phone number now and then?

    Whose advice should you be taking?
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    (Original post by py0alb)
    Alright, so lets follow this line of thought: say you need to emulate someone else and practice socialising with women.

    Who should you emulate: someone who was naturally successful at it and effortlessly breezed through their 20s withe a constant stream of girlfriends, **** buddies and dates lined up without ever having to even actually try to pull, or someone else who was equally as incompetent as you, and has to work really hard memorising routines and techniques just to get a phone number now and then?

    Whose advice should you be taking?
    The person who had to learn.

    People who have learnt things unconsciously don't always know WHY and HOW they learnt them, and thus cannot always successfully transfer that knowledge and skills.

    Sometimes they can, sometimes they can't.

    It's the recent why most (not ALL, but most) sports coaches being people who only had moderate success at their sport.

    I'd rather take coaching lessons from a top class winning coach who's only played in a handful of first class games than most (NOT ALL) international players in almost any sport tbh
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    (Original post by py0alb)
    Alright, so lets follow this line of thought: say you need to emulate someone else and practice socialising with women.

    Who should you emulate: someone who was naturally successful at it and effortlessly breezed through their 20s withe a constant stream of girlfriends, **** buddies and dates lined up without ever having to even actually try to pull, or someone else who was equally as incompetent as you, and has to work really hard memorising routines and techniques just to get a phone number now and then?

    Whose advice should you be taking?
    Your implying that friendship technique for the incompetent guy would work. Treating girls as friends doesn't work. You just get friendzoned.

    At least if you awkwardly ask out 1,000 girls it might lead to something. But, friendzoning yourself with 1,000 girls will lead to nothing. Actually, it would end up you listening to girls saying how much there boyfriends sucks and how they would like to be with someone like you, but not you.

    So yeah, I would pick the second guy. The first guy is probably a 9/10.
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    do you mind me asking whether you are male or female?
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    (Original post by dgeorge)
    The person who had to learn.

    People who have learnt things unconsciously don't always know WHY and HOW they learnt them, and thus cannot always successfully transfer that knowledge and skills.

    Sometimes they can, sometimes they can't.

    It's the recent why most (not ALL, but most) sports coaches being people who only had moderate success at their sport.

    I'd rather take coaching lessons from a top class winning coach who's only played in a handful of first class games than most (NOT ALL) international players in almost any sport tbh

    lol, fair enough, enjoy being a loser your whole life.
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    (Original post by HistoryRepeating)
    BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA
    BEFORE I GET NEGGED TO ****.. this is all taken out of the game, i strongly advise you read the game, its a great book, informative and interesting, the op is meerly a follower of a much higher god, preaching what is known as the bible (game/mystery method), he is not the true god, the true god('s) are a bunch of middle aged men probably on there computers playing dragon fighter thinking of new techniques to pick up perfect 10s...

    To get the girl you dont have to be charming, a swimwear model, flatter her with roses but meerly be smart, hot thinking and know what to say next..

    Honestly great book:
    http://www.waterstones.com/waterston...+game/6071060/

    Snippets of what YOU can achieve:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ddjZf7Nqbo0
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    (Original post by Simplicity)
    Your implying that friendship technique for the incompetent guy would work. Treating girls as friends doesn't work. You just get friendzoned.

    At least if you awkwardly ask out 1,000 girls it might lead to something. But, friendzoning yourself with 1,000 girls will lead to nothing. Actually, it would end up you listening to girls saying how much there boyfriends sucks and how they would like to be with someone like you, but not you.

    So yeah, I would pick the second guy. The first guy is probably a 9/10.
    Where the **** did this "friendship technique" come from? Certainly not from me.

    Be yourself, if you're a cool guy, women will want to sleep with you anyway.
    If you're not a cool guy, then make yourself a cool guy. You can't fake it, women aren't stupid, despite what PUA websites will tell you.

    Cool guys do not going round using lines, routines and techniques, this is probably the single fastest way to turn any woman off.
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    (Original post by py0alb)
    lol, fair enough, enjoy being a loser your whole life.
    Funny enough, you praised and quoted me on some of my relationship advice not long ago, and supported it....

    I guess this makes you a loser too?

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    (Original post by py0alb)
    lol, fair enough, enjoy being a loser your whole life.
    Shame you can't just admit that maybe you aren't right about everything, and have decided to come off as as complete idiot on this thread. Sometimes, you make genuinely decent points
 
 
 
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