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    (Original post by Shelly_x)
    Four more weeks of constant surveillance and being told I need to be more organised etc. Slightly difficult when I have to work on weekends just to survive!
    Shelly we have made the most difficult part, I have no more will power it's going to be a struggle getting in tomorrow.


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    (Original post by carnationlilyrose)
    I feel so sad that governmental interference of every colour over the last years has left education in this state, where those who are coming into the profession and should be keen, eager and enthusiastic are being broken like this before they even start.
    It makes me really sad to read these comments too. I'm due to start my School Direct course in September and it's terrifying and demoralising to read about current students dreading their return to school after the holidays. I really hope my experience will be different, but it seems that this is becoming the norm. I'm dreading and looking forward to my course in equal measure now.
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    (Original post by bellylaugh)
    It makes me really sad to read these comments too. I'm due to start my School Direct course in September and it's terrifying and demoralising to read about current students dreading their return to school after the holidays. I really hope my experience will be different, but it seems that this is becoming the norm. I'm dreading and looking forward to my course in equal measure now.
    I really hope you have a different experience, too. I'm looking at this from the perspective of someone close to retirement and who used to be subject mentor for two universities. My PGCE experience was light years away from what is described here and it was still one of the most difficult years of my life. I certainly wouldn't have done it if I'd read this thread and unfortunately, I know what they say is true, even though I'm on the outside looking in now. I wish you all the luck in the world.
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    (Original post by carnationlilyrose)
    I really hope you have a different experience, too. I'm looking at this from the perspective of someone close to retirement and who used to be subject mentor for two universities. My PGCE experience was light years away from what is described here and it was still one of the most difficult years of my life. I certainly wouldn't have done it if I'd read this thread and unfortunately, I know what they say is true, even though I'm on the outside looking in now. I wish you all the luck in the world.

    You are very-very kind. Thank you for supporting us, who are just about to embark on the training route or the 1st "real" teaching year.

    From my perspective, I can only hope that this situation is not going to stay for too long: after all, if there is an excess of tension/pressure, it is bound to erupt in some way, forcing the situation to change. If that change will be for better or worse, no one can tell.
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    (Original post by lantan)
    You are very-very kind. Thank you for supporting us, who are just about to embark on the training route or the 1st "real" teaching year.

    From my perspective, I can only hope that this situation is not going to stay for too long: after all, if there is an excess of tension/pressure, it is bound to erupt in some way, forcing the situation to change. If that change will be for better or worse, no one can tell.
    I've never forgotten what it's like to be in your shoes: worn out, terrified, unsure how to handle things, wondering how the hell things went wrong so quickly, not having enough time to plan things, wondering when you went from being one of us to one of them, wondering why everything you try seems to fall flat on its face at times. That's all without the endless observation, evaluation, paperwork, meaningless jargon and all the rest. I wonder how long the situation can hang together, too. And yet I see wonderful NQTs and trainees where I work and am full of admiration for them and they way they stick it out. It does get better, although I am speaking from a perspective of more than 30 years, so I'd got things together a long time before things seemed to get really stupid about 10 - 15 years ago and I'm not sure if I'd be able to do it now. Someone has to, though, because if ever there was a time when kids needed help and guidance, it's now, and the irony is that teachers are being hamstrung in their attempts to do something about it by people who have no idea at all why things are going wrong, because they don't see the day to day reality in schools. Of course, everyone's an expert on education, aren't they, because everyone went to school....
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    (Original post by bellylaugh)
    It makes me really sad to read these comments too. I'm due to start my School Direct course in September and it's terrifying and demoralising to read about current students dreading their return to school after the holidays. I really hope my experience will be different, but it seems that this is becoming the norm. I'm dreading and looking forward to my course in equal measure now.
    Just a positive note. I absolutely agree with the regrets posted here about the way things are going policy wise; there are many problems in education and it is a tough job (made even tougher by the fact that a lot of people seem to think it's easy), without negating the hard work people in many other professions do. And I am way too early in my career (NQT) to say how it will affect my future, or to make comparisons with the past (a lot of my colleagues find the current conditions much worse because they can look back and see how much better it used to be).

    But.... I had a wonderful time on my PGCE last year. Yes, there were several days throughout the year where I cried and thought 'What if I can't do this?!' and many many more where I felt exhausted and like I just didn't have time to do what I needed to. But I never considered quitting and I always felt like this was what I wanted to do. I did still see my friends every now and then, I did still have time to watch some TV and play some games (and come on TSR!). It is very very hard work but I still enjoyed it and managed it. And this year as an NQT I have become even better at managing my time (because really, that's what it's all about... managing your time and prioritising things, giving yourself a break sometimes even when things need doing) and have an even better balance. I guess what I am trying to say is, I still wouldn't say it's the norm to have horrific experiences and not want to go back in to school. Most of my peers at this point on the course were dying to get back in to school when on uni days and really were loving the teaching, even though they were all just as exhausted and stretched. I certainly didn't feel the despair expressed by some in this thread. So chances are, you will have a tough but positive experience.

    Plus at least you have the element of having chosen your school (I think?) so hopefully chosen one that matches your ethos as a teacher more. A big part of people not enjoying their placements is often that they just don't gel with the school at all, and that is much less likely if you chose the school yourself.

    Good luck!

    xxx
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    (Original post by carnationlilyrose)
    Of course, everyone's an expert on education, aren't they, because everyone went to school....
    I see the irony too.
    Though for me the realization that I don't know anything about education in the UK came quite quickly as I was schooled in a completely different way in a different country. So I didn't have any preconceptions and was a bit like a blank paper - maybe this made things a bit easier...

    I have to say with all the misery and feeling a lab-rat during this training year, I do have spells of sunshine - days when I think that I quite enjoy teaching. Just wishing there were more of them!!!
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    (Original post by lantan)
    I see the irony too.
    Though for me the realization that I don't know anything about education in the UK came quite quickly as I was schooled in a completely different way in a different country. So I didn't have any preconceptions and was a bit like a blank paper - maybe this made things a bit easier...

    I have to say with all the misery and feeling a lab-rat during this training year, I do have spells of sunshine - days when I think that I quite enjoy teaching. Just wishing there were more of them!!!
    They will come, if you are cut out for the long haul. The longer you do it, the more there are.
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    (Original post by kpwxx)
    Just a positive note. I absolutely agree with the regrets posted here about the way things are going policy wise; there are many problems in education and it is a tough job (made even tougher by the fact that a lot of people seem to think it's easy), without negating the hard work people in many other professions do. And I am way too early in my career (NQT) to say how it will affect my future, or to make comparisons with the past (a lot of my colleagues find the current conditions much worse because they can look back and see how much better it used to be).

    But.... I had a wonderful time on my PGCE last year. Yes, there were several days throughout the year where I cried and thought 'What if I can't do this?!' and many many more where I felt exhausted and like I just didn't have time to do what I needed to. But I never considered quitting and I always felt like this was what I wanted to do. I did still see my friends every now and then, I did still have time to watch some TV and play some games (and come on TSR!). It is very very hard work but I still enjoyed it and managed it. And this year as an NQT I have become even better at managing my time (because really, that's what it's all about... managing your time and prioritising things, giving yourself a break sometimes even when things need doing) and have an even better balance. I guess what I am trying to say is, I still wouldn't say it's the norm to have horrific experiences and not want to go back in to school. Most of my peers at this point on the course were dying to get back in to school when on uni days and really were loving the teaching, even though they were all just as exhausted and stretched. I certainly didn't feel the despair expressed by some in this thread. So chances are, you will have a tough but positive experience.

    Plus at least you have the element of having chosen your school (I think?) so hopefully chosen one that matches your ethos as a teacher more. A big part of people not enjoying their placements is often that they just don't gel with the school at all, and that is much less likely if you chose the school yourself.

    Good luck!

    xxx
    Thanks for your post. It is quite depressing reading posts where people are literally dreading their return to the classroom so it's nice to hear that not everyone feels the same way! I guess I just have to wait until September now and see how I get on!
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    The feeling of dread comes from feeling unprepared and scrutinised IMO. I also feel very much a sense of teachers vs trainees sometimes. I guess that's only natural, they're there for the long haul, we're there a few months.

    This weekend I've worked about 7 hours overall and still have about half my lessons to plan for this coming week amongst many other bits of work to be done for this week for Uni.

    I had an awful few days last week - Thursday was the first time I've taught 4 out of 5 lessons on this course, I taught double year ten for the first time and though behaviour isn't an issue I get a sense that they don't like me yet, there's no real relationship there and I also feel like that with the year 9 class I've been teaching since I started the placement. The regular teacher of that class picked apart my lesson last week for 40 minutes of my lunch hour. She's the first teacher to be this brutal with me so far (I've read this is quite common for trainees but I guess I've been lucky until now!. Look, I don't mind someone telling me what went wrong with my lesson, I know it wasn't very good, but to literally go through it step by step with only negative comments in the lunch hour for 40 minutes was too much. Most of the criticism was fair enough (though I was acting on her previous advice) except for one comment which made me feel quite angry and deflated - that apparently I 'stutter sometimes and it's a sign of nervousness. You can get away with that here in a nice school but in a tough class you'll be ridiculed and eaten alive by the pupils'. Those were her exact words. No other teacher on my course has ever mentioned this so I was a bit taken aback. I guess I did stutter maybe twice in the lesson as I lost my train of thought but I'm only human!

    Anyway I took her advice on board, taught the class the next day and she did say it was much improved so that was quite nice.

    I just want to get past this week - tutor coming in on Tuesday to observe me last lesson, third review to be completed and 12 lessons to teach. Week after I'm only in school Tuesday and Wednesday because of bank holiday Monday and two days at Uni Thursday and Friday
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    (Original post by kpwxx)
    '
    Plus at least you have the element of having chosen your school (I think?) so hopefully chosen one that matches your ethos as a teacher more. A big part of people not enjoying their placements is often that they just don't gel with the school at all, and that is much less likely if you chose the school yourself.

    Good luck!

    xxx
    This is the reason I'm not enjoying it. I'm on a schools direct course but I made the wrong choice when choosing my school. When I went to my second placement I absolutely loved it and looked forward to going into school. I have a job there now so hopefully I will continue to enjoy it!

    (Original post by bellylaugh)
    Thanks for your post. It is quite depressing reading posts where people are literally dreading their return to the classroom so it's nice to hear that not everyone feels the same way! I guess I just have to wait until September now and see how I get on!
    See above. It isn't all bad my main gripe with it is that people are always wanting to see what you've done or see you in action and then comment on it. I was heavily criticised in my first assessed block, when beginning to teach, and it really affects my confidence and how i view observations and feedback. I've tried my best to get out of this mindset and be more positive but sometimes can't help slipping back into it.
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    (Original post by Shelly_x)
    This is the reason I'm not enjoying it. I'm on a schools direct course but I made the wrong choice when choosing my school. When I went to my second placement I absolutely loved it and looked forward to going into school. I have a job there now so hopefully I will continue to enjoy it!
    Welcome to the club.
    My mentor at the school flattened me to the ground so many times now that it was just ridiculous - even though I am used to a lot of criticism and negativity, that was really hard to cope with.
    I too felt so much better at my second placement that it became apparent I made a mistake with my choice of School Direct school.
    We'll get through this.
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    (Original post by Steveluis10)
    The feeling of dread comes from feeling unprepared and scrutinised IMO. I also feel very much a sense of teachers vs trainees sometimes. I guess that's only natural, they're there for the long haul, we're there a few months.

    I guess I did stutter maybe twice in the lesson as I lost my train of thought but I'm only human!
    I was lucky last year and had very supportive staff teams at both my schools. They were lovely and really helped me through.

    The stuttering thing sounds ridiculous. I wouldn't worry about it certainly as if it hadn't seemed an issue to you it probably isn't one! Regardless, if it was a speech issue that a student had saying something like that is certainly not the right way to deal with it... people don't just 'turn off' stutters and handling it in such a manner could easily make it worse were it a real issue. I would have hoped a teacher would know that...?

    Anyway, I'm glad you felt you got something out of the criticism in the most part.

    (Original post by Shelly_x)
    .
    (Original post by lantan)
    .

    I always found and still find the criticism tough. It's weird as almost all the time I've already noticed the issues and picked out areas for improvement that my mentor etc had picked out. So I completely agree with all the suggestions, and my mentors as I said were very supportive so always did it in a very positive supportive way. Yet I was still close to (or actually in) tears a couple of times; I think it's purely human nature. Even when you know it's correct it's very hard to hear someone say something you did was not good, and even more so in this context where you've poured your heart and soul (and probably hours of time and effort in to planning) in to it. Your natural instinct is to get upset and have your confidence knocked. I found the way to deal with it which worked for me was rationalising it like this... reminding myself that I really didn't need to be upset because I agreed and that wouldn't help, I just needed to use it to improve my teaching and get over it basically. And remember that so much of the learning comes just from the experience anyway... trust me when you look back in a years time you will be amazed at how far you have come as a teacher, just think what it will be like in 20 years!!!

    xxxxx
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    (Original post by kpwxx)

    I always found and still find the criticism tough. It's weird as almost all the time I've already noticed the issues and picked out areas for improvement that my mentor etc had picked out. So I completely agree with all the suggestions, and my mentors as I said were very supportive so always did it in a very positive supportive way. Yet I was still close to (or actually in) tears a couple of times; I think it's purely human nature. Even when you know it's correct it's very hard to hear someone say something you did was not good, and even more so in this context where you've poured your heart and soul (and probably hours of time and effort in to planning) in to it. Your natural instinct is to get upset and have your confidence knocked. I found the way to deal with it which worked for me was rationalising it like this... reminding myself that I really didn't need to be upset because I agreed and that wouldn't help, I just needed to use it to improve my teaching and get over it basically. And remember that so much of the learning comes just from the experience anyway... trust me when you look back in a years time you will be amazed at how far you have come as a teacher, just think what it will be like in 20 years!!!

    xxxxx

    I agree with everything you said, just a couple of thoughts: for everything we say, it's so important HOW we say things, instead of WHAT we say, and I found this even more true for the criticisms - i.e you can say the same thing and knock the person's confidence over, or give them a confidence boost.
    It's funny how we are told as trainees that in teaching we shouldn't give pupils 50 things to think about in our feedback as they wouldn't be able to concentrate on so many, yet I found this the case so many times when the feedback is given to the trainees (not just me). And of course, all too often the feedback is negatively orientated, as if only the failings are worth spending more time on; the successes are usually brushed aside. Now, I am perfectly aware that, unfortunately, this is the case in "real" teachers' school lives, but I think during the training year one is truly vulnerable with the lack of experience, confidence, etc., to forget the upsetting things and move on, as the experienced teacher would most likely do.
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    (Original post by lantan)
    I agree with everything you said, just a couple of thoughts: for everything we say, it's so important HOW we say things, instead of WHAT we say, and I found this even more true for the criticisms - i.e you can say the same thing and knock the person's confidence over, or give them a confidence boost.
    It's funny how we are told as trainees that in teaching we shouldn't give pupils 50 things to think about in our feedback as they wouldn't be able to concentrate on so many, yet I found this the case so many times when the feedback is given to the trainees (not just me). And of course, all to often the feedback is negatively orientated, as if only the failings are worth spending more time on; the successes are usually brushed aside. Now, I am perfectly aware that the, unfortunately, this is the case in "real" teachers' school lives, but I think during the training year one is truly vulnerable with the lack of experience, confidence, etc., to forget the upsetting things and move on, as the experienced teacher would most likely do.
    Wow, you just summed up my own feelings from my training year so eloquently. Thinking back to that year still hurts even though it was 5 years ago.
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    Eek, had an interview today and just waiting for the phone call... My lesson was brilliant but interview was iffy. Fingers crossed!

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    Let us know how it goes! If your lesson was brilliant they'd be foolish not to hire you IMO.

    Utterly horrendous day for me for reasons I won't go into.

    Planned to do work tonight but got a thumping headache so going to order pizza and watch football instead.
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    (Original post by Steveluis10)
    Let us know how it goes! If your lesson was brilliant they'd be foolish not to hire you IMO.

    Utterly horrendous day for me for reasons I won't go into.

    Planned to do work tonight but got a thumping headache so going to order pizza and watch football instead.
    Lol I also have a banging head ache, can't do any work. Just going to stay in bed and watch TV.

    We all have them awful days, put it over you and on to the next. However I know how difficult it's is to pick yourself up.


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    They chose the guy with the better interview over me. Gutted isn't even the word

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    (Original post by outlaw-torn)
    They chose the guy with the better interview over me. Gutted isn't even the word

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    Aww don't worry, don't let it bug you. You made it to the interview stage and were shortlisted. It happens, head up - I'm sure you will get a job.

    BTW just some advice and a thing I have noted - visiting a school before applying helps and puts you in good stead, I know of a few people who have jobs and all who visited the school before hand.

    That said I am in need of my own advice - I need to apply - just don't have the will power or energy.


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