Depression Society MkII Watch

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becki08
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#3421
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#3421
:hugs: for gooner1991. Don't give up sweetie. You can get through this. There's always another way out. Can you get anyone to be with you at the moment?
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becki08
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#3422
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#3422
Not good. Getting worked up. Miss her so much. Don't know what to do. Need help but don't know who to turn to. Not good not good not good
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*pink_sapphires*
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#3423
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#3423
(Original post by becki08)
Not good. Getting worked up. Miss her so much. Don't know what to do. Need help but don't know who to turn to. Not good not good not good
I'm really missing Vicki today too. Cancer is surrounding me at the minute and it just brings back our all memories together.

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=e5r3R_...eature=related

Watch that...it's the most emotional song every and it makes me cry everytime I listen to it but it makes me realise that she's in a better place now.

Also...http://www.brianmay.com/vickisworld/mar04.html the poem that Vicki wrote which is at the bottom of the page...I know she's watching over me and i know that Stephanie will be looking over you too :hugs: xxx
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becki08
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#3424
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#3424
(Original post by *pink_sapphires*)
I'm really missing Vicki today too. Cancer is surrounding me at the minute and it just brings back our all memories together.

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=e5r3R_...eature=related

Watch that...it's the most emotional song every and it makes me cry everytime I listen to it but it makes me realise that she's in a better place now.

Also...http://www.brianmay.com/vickisworld/mar04.html the poem that Vicki wrote which is at the bottom of the page...I know she's watching over me and i know that Stephanie will be looking over you too :hugs: xxx
:hugs: *cuddles* :hugs:
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Laus
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#3425
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#3425
I can't go to uni.

I feel depressed, I'm too exhausted, I have no clothes, I'm FAT, I ******* hate myself........ my parents will hate me but I don't care. I REALLY can't do this. I can't pretend I want to go -I don't want to go. I don't want to stay like this either but moving won't help. I feel so so sick and scared and just awful.
gooner1991
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#3426
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#3426
My piano teacher's dying of cancer.She just phoned to tell me I shouldn't give up playing and I'm the best pupil she's ever had. She said I'm beautiful and she'll always be there. :'(
I don't want a new teacher,I've had her for 13 years and she's like a member of my family.She's always been there for me and she was one of the only people who believed in me.I'm so upset I don't want to be here anymore
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Planto
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#3427
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#3427
I just had a bit of a revelation. I've always thought I was a negative, low person who just had bursts of happiness when I was around friends etc., when in fact I'm probably actually that happy person, just shrouded by anxiety when I'm out of that comfortable environment.

I always thought my frustration and negativity were part of my personality, but it doesn't follow because it all disappears completely when I'm with people I care about.
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raspberrybubbles
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#3428
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#3428
Laus, I believe in you. I felt the same just before I went, and now it's okay. :hugs:
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Dalimyr
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#3429
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#3429
:bawling: I'm relapsing again...I hate this, I hate this, I ****ing hate this :mad: I'm also worried having just read the side-effects section on my new pack of citalopram to see it listing suicide attempts as a "common" side-effect rather than "uncommon", and the GP knew I'd had suicidal tendencies (including having a history of suicide attempts). I'm wishing I'd seen that earlier as the health centre's closed over the weekend but I think I'll be making another appointment on Monday to have a word about this. It's my third relapse with serious suicidal thoughts since starting my course of citalopram five weeks ago, and it's obviously a serious concern for me :s:
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starchild
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#3430
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#3430
Hey guys, how are you all? Im here with Kate and we have just had a lovely day at the beach. Errm, i miss you all tonnes and sorry for not posting much but I am still here.

Hope all is well,

lots of love and hugs

sitara and kate :hugs:
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becki08
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#3431
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#3431
:hugs: for sitara and kate. glad you're having a lovely time x
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becki08
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#3432
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#3432
wrsetdryftghbkjngdrsetrdcjhb bleh
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Sabertooth
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#3433
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#3433
want to talk becki? :hugs:
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becki08
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#3434
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#3434
Just feeling very bleh and lonely. My social mentor was going to come and see me tonight but she hasn't turned up and isn't replying to texts. I've barely seen anyone all day. Fed up of this and want to drink lots but I can't get to my vodka and I can't be bothered to go down to the bar although I may do soon. I'm pathetic and I hate me.

How are you though? :hugs:
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Sabertooth
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#3435
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#3435
(Original post by becki08)
Just feeling very bleh and lonely. My social mentor was going to come and see me tonight but she hasn't turned up and isn't replying to texts. I've barely seen anyone all day. Fed up of this and want to drink lots but I can't get to my vodka and I can't be bothered to go down to the bar although I may do soon. I'm pathetic and I hate me.

How are you though? :hugs:
I'm here all night if you need someone to talk to to not feel lonely? :hugs: You're not pathetic at all, but drink really really doesn't help. Sure short term it makes you feel better but it can cause problems with money, your liver, your mood in general and other long term problems.

Did you see a doctor about your head in the end? Hope that turned out alright.


I'm really struggling atm, so lonely at uni, can't cope with the work the lectures the voices everything just building up at once. I really hate it here but talking to the mental health person later this week so hopefully she can help.
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becki08
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#3436
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#3436
(Original post by Sabertooth)
I'm here all night if you need someone to talk to to not feel lonely? :hugs: You're not pathetic at all, but drink really really doesn't help. Sure short term it makes you feel better but it can cause problems with money, your liver, your mood in general and other long term problems.

Did you see a doctor about your head in the end? Hope that turned out alright.


I'm really struggling atm, so lonely at uni, can't cope with the work the lectures the voices everything just building up at once. I really hate it here but talking to the mental health person later this week so hopefully she can help.
:hugs: sorry you're finding things hard. If you ever want to talk I'm here ok. I hope the mental health person can help later. Have you applied for DSA at all?

I didn't see a doctor in the end but my head feels ok now. I have an appointment on Monday though so I may or may not mention it there - depending on whether she's seen the form which says what happened. (I'd rather avoid all possible questions if possible). The stupid thing is that drink doesn't even make me feel better, it makes me hysterical, but somehow that feels better than being like this. I don't have to fight anything if I'm drunk. I just accept it and it all flows over me rather than me having to constantly push it away which is so tiring. It's annoying because I want it to make things better and I think it will which is why I do it but in the end it doesn't actually help. Bah it's annoying and I'm really craving a drink. I'm getting quite worried that I could get addicted to it :
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Sabertooth
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#3437
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#3437
(Original post by becki08)
:hugs: sorry you're finding things hard. If you ever want to talk I'm here ok. I hope the mental health person can help later. Have you applied for DSA at all?

I didn't see a doctor in the end but my head feels ok now. I have an appointment on Monday though so I may or may not mention it there - depending on whether she's seen the form which says what happened. (I'd rather avoid all possible questions if possible). The stupid thing is that drink doesn't even make me feel better, it makes me hysterical, but somehow that feels better than being like this. I don't have to fight anything if I'm drunk. I just accept it and it all flows over me rather than me having to constantly push it away which is so tiring. It's annoying because I want it to make things better and I think it will which is why I do it but in the end it doesn't actually help. Bah it's annoying and I'm really craving a drink. I'm getting quite worried that I could get addicted to it :
Thanks No I've not applied but I'll talk to the woman about it.

Yeah you have to be really careful about drink along with depression, I've heard it's a bit easier to get addicted to it and alcohol addiction is a real *****. I know what you mean about the alcohol though, it's like a release from all the **** you're feeling atm even if it brings its own **** along with it it's a different kind. Alcohol is a coping mechanism, like self harm, and you probably need to find a different, more healthy, way of coping with emotions. Have you told the doctor about this? They might be able to help you identify other ways to cope. :hugs:
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becki08
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#3438
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#3438
(Original post by Sabertooth)
Thanks No I've not applied but I'll talk to the woman about it.

Yeah you have to be really careful about drink along with depression, I've heard it's a bit easier to get addicted to it and alcohol addiction is a real *****. I know what you mean about the alcohol though, it's like a release from all the **** you're feeling atm even if it brings its own **** along with it it's a different kind. Alcohol is a coping mechanism, like self harm, and you probably need to find a different, more healthy, way of coping with emotions. Have you told the doctor about this? They might be able to help you identify other ways to cope. :hugs:
Definitely talk to her about it. You can get several things that can really help.

At the moment my coping mechanisms seem to be either coming on here which is the only good one, or alcohol and self-harming. I've really not been coping too well. I'll try to talk to the doctor about it on Monday. I told her I'd been finding it hard not to SH and she said that to try not to but it didn't matter if i did which didn't really help tbh. But oh well.
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Sabertooth
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#3439
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#3439
Yeah that's pretty much what my doctor said about SH to me, I guess they see it as better than the alternative although of course not as good as healthy ways of coping. Definitely talk to your doctor on monday though, good luck hopefully she can recommend some alternatives. I find watching a movie helps, punching pillow so hard until I'm exhausted or looking at cute videos of kittens on youtube. Anything to take your mind off it.
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becki08
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#3440
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#3440
She doesn't even know about the drinking because it's a very new thing - just the last couple of weeks. I will try to tell her though. I've been making a slideshow of elephants to try and distract myself sometimes (I have an obsession with them )
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