fallen_acorns
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As another update.. starting tommorow its 'lily-does-movember'

I will explain more later.. but to be quck: I am doing movember in recgonition that trans* women can also suffer with prostate and testicular cancer.
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there's too much love
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(Original post by fallen_acorns)
First abuse I have had in a month or so..

Bellow is my thoughts/roughly what happened.. It wasn't that bad, but still always takes me by surprise

[This is lifted dirrectly off my film-promotion blog, so it goes a bit promotional at the end.. ignore that.. but I dont have the energy to re-write it..]

"It" - Abuse




"This is me, Lily – The organiser of the film.

This photo was taken just as I arrived back from a production meeting for the film. I don’t look very feminine: by this point I had been on the go for 14 hours, mostly working on the film. My hair is just casually tied back, I’m wearing minimal makeup, casual old clothes… All in all, not passing very well.

Even with all this in mind, you are still taken by surprise when the abuse comes.

It’s almost too perfect, is it not? Trans* women, is on her way home from a meeting for a film about trans* abuse.. and then suffers abuse herself.

Somehow the bittersweet timing of the whole thing, did still manage to reach me, as I blocked out the sound of guy shouting

‘WHAT IS IT??’
‘****ING ******, IF THAT’S A BOY, I WILL KICK THE **** OUT OF IT’
[By this point I’m escaping away very swiftly..]

I won’t go into full details of what was said.. it’s not productive for any of us, and after an evening of this, then having to look at a picture of myself, I would prefer to just pretend none of it exists.

I wasn’t even going to mention it. As I walked home, I thought:

“no I won’t use a bad event, as a way to hit home a message about my film project”

But then the more I thought about it, the more it changed to:

“Yes, actually, I will use it. I will try and take this ****ty and awful occurrence and use it in the film promotion?
Why? Because the thought of turning their abuse, into a tool for helping people. The idea that their hatred, would end up helping to raise money to support the very thing they so explicitly hate? Is just one that I can’t resist”

There will be no further updates this evening, as I just want to forget I exist for a little while, and ignore trans* things.

Thank you all for your support on the project, it means so much to me. Even more so, in light of tonight’s events, that you are all so willing to help out and stop things like this from happening.

For anyone who is still thinking about supporting the cause: Please Please do. I don’t want anyone to feel as I do now, and I don’t want anyone to be treated with as little worth and value as I was tonight."
That's horrible, but how can I not like it when you post something in such brave manner?
I hope you're okay. It's something most of us will never really experience. For me as a white non-trans seemingly (to the outside world, as my partner is female) heterosexual, 'middle class', non immigrant male, there's no abuse like that I can say is in my life.
No story that could be comparable.

Do you have a link to the website? I'd love to see the film when it comes out.
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Flauta
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#363
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(Original post by fallen_acorns)
As another update.. starting tommorow its 'lily-does-movember'

I will explain more later.. but to be quck: I am doing movember in recgonition that trans* women can also suffer with prostate and testicular cancer.
Wow what a great idea, that's never been something that I've considered. Are you doing it to raise money? I have no way of donating to you directly but I'll be thinking of you when I make my general donation

I have so much love for this thread, been amazing to see your transformation. Don't have any questions though, just here to say thanks for informing me and I wish you the best of luck for the future
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Aust1n
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Haven't posted a question in ages. Nor will I now. I just thought you may appreciate this little doozey from Paris Lees...
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username1296076
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Have you ever been discriminated against because of your gender identity for religious reasons? What kind of attitudes do religions have towards transgender people, and have these attitudes affected you?


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fallen_acorns
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(Original post by AWJChadders)
Have you ever been discriminated against because of your gender identity for religious reasons? What kind of attitudes do religions have towards transgender people, and have these attitudes affected you?


Posted from TSR Mobile
umm, in all honesty.. not that I know of. well, ish.

I mean, I have been discriminated against, and faced abuse/problems with people.. but you never really know why..
in the moment, you dont exactly have a debate, so I dont know why the man kicked me out of X place, or why the guy shouted X at me... maybe it was because of their religion? maybe not?

I guess, I mean, I certianly am nervous around groups that are more religious.. put me in a room with an islamic group, or a group of more traditional christians, and I would probably presume they had a problem with me..

On the other hand a lot of my closes friends are religious, and range from islam, christianity and hinduism.. so its not a complete rule - there are friendly and cruel people in them all..
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bestofyou
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How long have you been on hormones etc?
did you just go to the doctor or what is the process exactly?
Does the NHS cover it?

Can you also answer this for me? You can just reply in this thread as opposed to that one instead of making two posts.
http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/show....php?t=2502498

Thanks
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fallen_acorns
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(Original post by bestofyou)
How long have you been on hormones etc?
did you just go to the doctor or what is the process exactly?
Does the NHS cover it?

Can you also answer this for me? You can just reply in this thread as opposed to that one instead of making two posts.
http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/show....php?t=2502498

Thanks
- I have been on hormones for 11 months now,
But it has not been very straight forward.. I tend to lead a pretty eratic and unstable life, so keeping track of things like hormones is challenging at times- and keeping up with GIC appointments and things is tough.. so my levels and dose have been all over the place.. They are great though, the changes are slow, and take up to 4 years or so, to fully have their effect.. and that effect changes based on the person.

- You go to the doctor first,
- Then they refer you to a psychiatrist/therapist, who will assess whether you need any treatment/how you feel.
- After this, you will be refered to a GIC (gender Identity clinic) where you will reciever your trieatment.
- At the GIC, it takes a mimium of 3 months living as a girl, 3 apointments with a psychotherapist, and an apointment with their doctor, before they will even consider giving you hormones.. its very personal, they base it on whether you are ready, and how you will cope.

- Yes the NHS will cover it, although it take a while, from the moment you see your doctor, to getting hormones, usually can take 12 months or so.. (depending on where you live)
- Other people will go private, and pay themselves, as that means you can do it quicker.

As for makeup:

This is a very old, and standard way of doing trans* makeup - its often the 'defualt' that new trans* people, start with... then over time they try different things, and addpat it to look good on them/change thigns around:

To hide stuble/blue shaddow/hair folicules on face:

1, Concealer, slightly lighter then your skin tone, covering the whole area
2, Lipstick. it sounds wierd, but a couple of dabs of red lipstick, counters the blue nature of mens chins.. not to much, it should look you are slightly flustered, not sunburned!
3, foundation, matching your skin tone - it will bring everything back to the right colour/tone, but without the blue
4, Powder/stuff - to finish it off, and make it look nice/real/not like make-up

Face:

- The key things with the face, are to empahise your cheek bones, and destract away from male features, it depends what your face is like, but trans* women will use makeup to try and contour their face into a more female shape.

Eyes:

- Big big eyes.. most trans people use the typical mascara/shadow style, to make their eyes stand out more, and seem bigger.. as bigger eyes = more feminine, typically..

Hair:

- Hair is a big thing to consider, it can be used to cover up male features, say a frindge covering up a more male forhead, or short/long hair by the side of your face, to frame it in a more female way, etc.

-- those would be the basic things to consider

its a long process being trans, it doesnt happen quickly, and it is a painfull journey, but if it is something you have to do, then you will end a more happy, confident, and content person.
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Parano!d
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(Original post by fallen_acorns)
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Hey, i'm interested to know what made you undergo this transformation? Was it like a gradual change in self-perception or was it more of an epiphany of some sort? Or was it a combination of different things?

Apologies if you've answered this before, feel free to link me to the post if you have. Thanks.
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bestofyou
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(Original post by fallen_acorns)
- I have been on hormones for 11 months now,
But it has not been very straight forward.. I tend to lead a pretty eratic and unstable life, so keeping track of things like hormones is challenging at times- and keeping up with GIC appointments and things is tough.. so my levels and dose have been all over the place.. They are great though, the changes are slow, and take up to 4 years or so, to fully have their effect.. and that effect changes based on the person.

- You go to the doctor first,
- Then they refer you to a psychiatrist/therapist, who will assess whether you need any treatment/how you feel.
- After this, you will be refered to a GIC (gender Identity clinic) where you will reciever your trieatment.
- At the GIC, it takes a mimium of 3 months living as a girl, 3 apointments with a psychotherapist, and an apointment with their doctor, before they will even consider giving you hormones.. its very personal, they base it on whether you are ready, and how you will cope.

- Yes the NHS will cover it, although it take a while, from the moment you see your doctor, to getting hormones, usually can take 12 months or so.. (depending on where you live)
- Other people will go private, and pay themselves, as that means you can do it quicker.
How do they know you have been living as a girl? I mean granted it would be pointless to do so, but hypothetically can't you just tell them that you lived as a female for x months?

How much quicker is it private and how much does it cost? Would that be with the likes of BUPA?

One thing is that my hair is quite thin and only getting thinner, 12 months down the line it could end up looking so awful that I'll not even be able to grow it out and I'd much prefer not to have to use wigs all the time. Is there anything that can be done about that?

When you told everyone, how much of a surprise was it etc? I've just started university and made friends as a male, its going to be hard just showing up looking like a girl. Do you think I should consider a transfer?

Thanks for the advice btw
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