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    (Original post by Profesh)
    Make some.



    Get a job. Sign on. Read books; lots of them. Read Wikipedia. Read TV Tropes.



    You've no means of watching television, playing videogames, going out and getting drunk with like-minded people? Rubbish.



    Symptomatic of everything else.
    That's right, no means of doing what I used to do with like minded people because there's no springboard to meeting these like minded people.

    How do you "make friends" just like that? It's not easy at all.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    That's right, no means of doing what I used to do with like minded people because there's no springboard to meeting these like minded people.

    How do you "make friends" just like that? It's not easy at all.
    Thats because you need to CREATE this springboard. Be happy on your own believe it or not you don't need people just do your own thing..go travelling for a few weeks, go to the gym just focus on yourself and friends will probably come along the way.

    Also try chatting as much as you can with old friends on facebook and ask if they want to meet up.
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    (Original post by goodLife)
    Thats because you need to CREATE this springboard. Be happy on your own believe it or not you don't need people just do your own thing..go travelling for a few weeks, go to the gym just focus on yourself and friends will probably come along the way.

    Also try chatting as much as you can with old friends on facebook and ask if they want to meet up.
    People think making friends is easy though. It isn't. Not to mention members of the opposite sex
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    People think making friends is easy though. It isn't. Not to mention members of the opposite sex
    You're ignoring all constructive advice, though. You seem happy to complain, but you're ignoring everyone who points out that it's YOU that needs to make the changes.
    • #4
    #4

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I don't have any true friends, zero social life, no money, no job to speak of and am just going through life in a daze. Existing rather than living. I have virtually nothing, and suffer from depression anyway so it makes things worse.
    That's basically me except I spend my weekdays working which keeps my mind off of things.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    That's the point, I'm not AT uni anymore.
    oops sorry, should read more carefully.
    dont most of those things still apply?
    do u have a job??
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    listen to no surprises by radiohead
    • #5
    #5

    i can relate. youre right its really not a case of 'just make friends'.
    force yourself to do something (find voluntary work at least, it fills loads of time and can sometimes lead to a job). use the guilt of letting your degree go to waste motivate you to do something.
    • #6
    #6

    As uncomfortable as it may seem to read this but sometimes the best thing to do is force yourself into change. Try to find work - paid or voluntary. If it's paid - great You'll be able to earn some money and meet some new people. Voluntary is still good as you're kept occupied and can still meet some new people, it's also beneficial to mention when you're looking for another job.

    A few months ago I was just like you, I can't believe the difference getting a job has made to many things - including the way my family treat me. I couldn't have imagined taking the leap to applying for a job/going through interviews and whatnot as I struggle with anxiety but it was my sister who got me the interview and I didn't want to let her down. What did I have to lose really? I'm not going to say it was easy - heck it still isn't easy but I feel better about myself now that I am doing something and meeting new people. My confidence is growing and I'm getting a nice bit of £££ every month.

    OP, have you spoken to your family about this? Perhaps they can support you. Yes, the hard work in shifting this will be down to you but having a supportive family member can make a difference.
    • #6
    #6

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    As uncomfortable as it may seem to read this but sometimes the best thing to do is force yourself into change. Try to find work - paid or voluntary. If it's paid - great You'll be able to earn some money and meet some new people. Voluntary is still good as you're kept occupied and can still meet some new people, it's also beneficial to mention when you're looking for another job.

    A few months ago I was just like you, I can't believe the difference getting a job has made to many things - including the way my family treat me. I couldn't have imagined taking the leap to applying for a job/going through interviews and whatnot as I struggle with anxiety but it was my sister who got me the interview and I didn't want to let her down. What did I have to lose really? I'm not going to say it was easy - heck it still isn't easy but I feel better about myself now that I am doing something and meeting new people. My confidence is growing and I'm getting a nice bit of £££ every month.

    OP, have you spoken to your family about this? Perhaps they can support you. Yes, the hard work in shifting this will be down to you but having a supportive family member can make a difference.
    The pound signs are showing up as jazzy symbols for some reason. Sorry Should've just said "money" - would've saved a post too.
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    Its days like this when I feel like seriously killing myself.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I don't have any friends where I live. No money to do anything. No means of creating the lifestyle I enjoyed at uni. Daily depression making me feel bad.

    Stuff like that
    Assuming you have a degree...why not get out and spend all of your boring waking hours pushing your CV into employers' hands? I've often found that when I have a lot of down time I tend to get homesick and depressed. Keep busy.
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    I felt the same during a level.
    Either get out and get traveling or take out a creative pursuit to rediscover yourself, you've obviously lost yourself amongst years of studying and being busy. What are/used to be your interests?

    Write, paint, watch movies, take walks, cook, draw, take photos, read, find yourself again.
    You could even write a blog about it.
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    Oh, and stop waiting for the storm to pass, go out and dance in the rain.
    • #1
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    (Original post by eaf7s)
    Assuming you have a degree...why not get out and spend all of your boring waking hours pushing your CV into employers' hands? I've often found that when I have a lot of down time I tend to get homesick and depressed. Keep busy.
    I dont have a degree.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I dont have a degree.
    So get out and push a CV anyway. You don't need a degree to work all day at trying to get some form of job, if for nothing else than to keep you busy.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    It's easy to see a clear horizon when you're not depressed but when you're as depressed as I am these days you just don't want to do anything. So all these suggestions that people are giving me are useless when I'm low on confidence motivation and genuinely don't care if I live or die.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's easy to see a clear horizon when you're not depressed but when you're as depressed as I am these days you just don't want to do anything. So all these suggestions that people are giving me are useless when I'm low on confidence motivation and genuinely don't care if I live or die.
    You're depressed BECAUSE you're not getting out and doing anything. So GO OUT AND DO SOMETHING.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's easy to see a clear horizon when you're not depressed but when you're as depressed as I am these days you just don't want to do anything. So all these suggestions that people are giving me are useless when I'm low on confidence motivation and genuinely don't care if I live or die.
    Then **** it, right, what's the point if in 60 years time we're all going to end up dead?

    Find something to live for. The other 6 billion people in the world have done, you can too. If not, then blimey, go see someone who can actually help you.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Since leaving uni this year I have been existing not living.

    I don't have any true friends, zero social life, no money, no job to speak of and am just going through life in a daze. Existing rather than living. I have virtually nothing, and suffer from depression anyway so it makes things worse.

    I want life to change and am doing things to try to make it change but I haven't had fun or been happy for nearly six months now.

    I'm only keeping strong for my family really. There might come a time where I will get bored of living in such a way though, and it scares me that I might do something dangerous.
    i completely resonate with this.i have tried to get a social life, but with no avail. i also have no people who are suited to me e.g intrests etc.

    Keep strong, its horrible go through this and very hard to fix.


    social isolation damages people.
 
 
 
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