Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

anyone else's brother/sibling like this? Watch

    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    yeah i sometimes think he feels the pressure of needing to be good at something maths/business/science related which he may not have a passion for hence why he's not motivated at all.... he's got so many skills though and he's so intelligent, he could apply this all to something else - i know he's always been a natural in english/writing. it's just a shame that he thinks if it's not a science or maths subject, he won't get anywhere in life.

    he won't get anywhere at this rate anyway, wish he'd just see that.
    Yeh you hit the nail on the head there. I wish I'd taken this advice when I was younger. Probably true for alot of people to be fair. You always want something you don't have and all....
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    nah..my lil sis is even more motivated than me! her teacher was like "if you keep going like this you'll get the nobel prize!" :P
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Trigger)
    The fact you are getting so wound up by this is pretty much all the proof i need that you aren't leaving him alone. I bet you nag and ***** and whine and he can't be arsed to listen to you. He will get it eventually either when his friends all bog off to do something more worthwhile, he wakes up one day and realises he wants more or your mum grows a backbone and tells him to support himself. Worked with my brother.
    there you go again with all your brilliantly inaccurate assumptions
    so now you know me AND my mum.
    and apparently you're under the impression that his friends HAVEN'T buggered off to make something of their lives, where did i say that exactly? because they're all in their final year at uni or have jobs.

    and yes, i get so wound up and nag at him all day, hence why i come on tsr as an anonymous user. because i just can't get enough of *****ing about it - to his face AND on an online forum.

    i'm glad it worked out with your brother. i may take a leaf out of your book and assume that he probably couldn't handle your psycho rudeness and judgemental attitude anymore that he finally had something to aim for - moving out to get away from you. and your mum, who is clearly a fierce *****.

    sorry, was that too assumptuous?
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    lol i don't give a **** about how it looks, i just want to see him have some direction in life. i couldn't care less if he decided he wanted to break into the teapot making industry.... just wish he had something to aim for!!
    I bet he's a drug dealer
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    there you go again with all your brilliantly inaccurate assumptions
    so now you know me AND my mum.
    and apparently you're under the impression that his friends HAVEN'T buggered off to make something of their lives, where did i say that exactly? because they're all in their final year at uni or have jobs.

    and yes, i get so wound up and nag at him all day, hence why i come on tsr as an anonymous user. because i just can't get enough of *****ing about it - to his face AND on an online forum.

    i'm glad it worked out with your brother. i may take a leaf out of your book and assume that he probably couldn't handle your psycho rudeness and judgemental attitude anymore that he finally had something to aim for - moving out to get away from you. and your mum, who is clearly a fierce *****.

    sorry, was that too assumptuous?
    Calm down love, you'l do yourself an injury.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Lamps08)
    I bet he's a drug dealer
    lol i don't think he has enough motivation or work ethic.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Trigger)
    Calm down love, you'l do yourself an injury.
    since you were the one that came in with the attitude, you might wanna take your own advice there sweet cheeks.

    op - my brother's a bit like this..... just let him know you're there to support him if he needs it?
    Offline

    16
    ReputationRep:
    Yep. My brother is 26, lives with my parents with apparently no desire to leave, he doesn't pay rent or housekeeping or make any contribution, my dad (until he went into hospital) cooks for him, my mum washes for him. He doesn't have job and despite recieving JSA doesn't appear to want one. When i finished uni at the same time as my brother my first priorties were getting a job and moving out, in the meantime i saved money so i could move out and paid rent to my parents.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by arabie)
    since you were the one that came in with the attitude, you might wanna take your own advice there sweet cheeks.

    op - my brother's a bit like this..... just let him know you're there to support him if he needs it?
    You fcuked up arabie
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by arabie)
    since you were the one that came in with the attitude, you might wanna take your own advice there sweet cheeks.

    op - my brother's a bit like this..... just let him know you're there to support him if he needs it?
    Awww bless. If you come in for "advice" then don't like whats being said that is your problem, not mine
    • PS Reviewer
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    See, I have the opposite problem. My older sister's doing HIV research for Harvard and MIT, whilst my younger sister is in medical school. They make me looks like a lazy ****
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by hippieglitter)
    Yep. My brother is 26, lives with my parents with apparently no desire to leave, he doesn't pay rent or housekeeping or make any contribution, my dad (until he went into hospital) cooks for him, my mum washes for him. He doesn't have job and despite recieving JSA doesn't appear to want one. When i finished uni at the same time as my brother my first priorties were getting a job and moving out, in the meantime i saved money so i could move out and paid rent to my parents.
    Haven't your parents made him hate them by now? He must be a real trooper to stay at home for this long lol. Give him 1000 'LAD' points from me will ya
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by hippieglitter)
    Yep. My brother is 26, lives with my parents with apparently no desire to leave, he doesn't pay rent or housekeeping or make any contribution, my dad (until he went into hospital) cooks for him, my mum washes for him. He doesn't have job and despite recieving JSA doesn't appear to want one. When i finished uni at the same time as my brother my first priorties were getting a job and moving out, in the meantime i saved money so i could move out and paid rent to my parents.
    wow, do you know why? is he just not motivated or is he down about his life?

    my brother once told me that the only reason he hasn't committed suicide is because he knows how much damage it'll do to my mum
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    See, I have the opposite problem. My older sister's doing HIV research for Harvard and MIT, whilst my younger sister is in medical school. They make me looks like a lazy ****
    lol but from your sig - it's clear that you have aims in life and want to go to uni/make something of yourself?

    it's not the subject or anything like that, it really isn't. doesn't matter if he wants to go and research alzheimer's or write poetry. he just does... nothing. he has no passion. he's enrolled at college but barely attends any classes and never does his work. as i said before - really couldn't care less if he decided he wanted to make teapots for a living or become a baker. ANY-THING.
    Offline

    16
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Lamps08)
    Haven't your parents made him hate them by now? He must be a real trooper to stay at home for this long lol. Give him 1000 'LAD' points from me will ya
    No, my parents are really lovley, but i think they are complete mugs for keeping him like this, let him move in with me and my bf for few months, we'd break him.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    hey ya i would suggest you to do is that give him an example catch one of your friends and tell them to do the exact thing as your brother is doing means jst for acting bt in real life stay the same and then fail in his/her exams only showing it to him bt actully nt failing just try these things and show it to him that yo would be one day repenting al dis and rnning here and there for jobs when yo get married worked with my bro
    Offline

    16
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    wow, do you know why? is he just not motivated or is he down about his life?

    my brother once told me that the only reason he hasn't committed suicide is because he knows how much damage it'll do to my mum
    He just has no ambition, gets that from my grandad, who only went out and worked his arse off to provide for his family but never felt the need to better himself. My boyfriend who is really motivated and ambitious has tried to help my brother but he's not having any of it he would rather live in his room on beer and classic biscuits watching his dvds. When i lived there half the time i didn't know if he was in or not cos i could go for whole days without seeing him.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by hippieglitter)
    No, my parents are really lovley, but i think they are complete mugs for keeping him like this, let him move in with me and my bf for few months, we'd break him.
    It's a pretty strange one, seeing as he's already had his independence at Uni. I wouldn't be able to hack it at home that long tbh. What does he actually do all day though?
    • PS Reviewer
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    lol but from your sig - it's clear that you have aims in life and want to go to uni/make something of yourself?

    it's not the subject or anything like that, it really isn't. doesn't matter if he wants to go and research alzheimer's or write poetry. he just does... nothing. he has no passion. he's enrolled at college but barely attends any classes and never does his work. as i said before - really couldn't care less if he decided he wanted to make teapots for a living or become a baker. ANY-THING.
    Well obviously I'm no doctor but I'd suspect that either your brother is just seriously lazy, or he's depressed or there's something quite wrong that needs further investigation.

    Do your parents not mind him just bumming around at home smoking shisha all the time? Has anyone asked him why he's not going to classes/doing the work, etc?
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    you actually know nothing about me or who i am so i'm not sure where those randomly spiteful adjectives came from but cool. did you even read my reply? you know - especially the part where i said i don't express these concerns to him at all??

    when someone you care about spends all day in their bedroom and leave when they want to go out and spend £100 on designer wear that they can't afford, good luck with that. enjoy being nosy and swatty.
    He really will sort himself out in his own time. I did something similar, I left school at 16 and basically realised life is a bit crap without a decent job and decided to go to uni.

    I'd been told my entire life how important working hard was but never took it seriously until I'd learned that lesson for myself.

    He will probably come to the same realisation... and if he doesn't, then it proves he's happy with his life as it is, which is all that really matters.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: December 11, 2010
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Did TEF Bronze Award affect your UCAS choices?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.