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I don't hate gay people, but am uncomfortable Watch

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    I'm not against gay people at all, many of my friends are gay.
    However It was pretty awkward when two of them came out at a party once, and i woke up that night and they were having sex in the bed next to me.... but i didn't want to move because I didnt want them to feel like I was against it.
    worst.night.ever.
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    (Original post by impressionist89)
    Are you guys just born like that? How does it work? How can you find another man attractive? Do you think like women?(with all the mood swings, emotional behaviour) etc?
    ....How old are you?
    I mean it's not that hard of a concept to understand, you can't imagine being with a guy and they can't imagine being with a girl. It's not a choice. A lot of people hate being gay.
    If you don't like seeing anal sex then just don't watch it. Simple as that.
    Just don't be an ass about it, thinking that everybody who is gay is like Graham Norton. Neil Patrick Harris is gay too and he doesn't fit your stereotype.
    Just accept that not everyone is like you and stop being such a kid about it.
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    (Original post by impressionist89)
    Are you guys just born like that?
    Yes, we can't change it.

    How does it work?
    Well I imagine it's pretty much the same as heterosexuality, except I prefer my gender rather than the other one. Apart from that there's no difference.

    How can you find another man attractive?
    I don't know why, I just know that I do. In the same way you find women attractive, I find men attractive. It creates the same physical response, emotional response and all the rest of it, just with a different gender, that's all.

    Do you think like women?(with all the mood swings, emotional behaviour) etc?
    No. Gay men are still men, and lesbian women are still women.
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    (Original post by impressionist89)
    I'm a straight male. I just can't fathom how people can be gay. I mean, the idea of kissing another man is utterly disgusting. Whenever I see a gay man, I always think of how they'd kiss another man and the anal sex and I mean, it just grosses me out. I don't hate gay people, but I'm very uncomfortable around them.
    I really want to get over this though. Any suggestions?
    It's like if you see two old people kissing. It's pretty gross. You may not be able to control the revulsion you feel, it may even be natural (your body saying don't mate with that?), but you have no reason to find old people gross when they're not kissing. It should be the same with gay men... obviously ideally, you would feel okay with the idea of them kissing, but if you're able to control your imagination when it comes to old people, you can do it when it comes to gay men.
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    (Original post by impressionist89)
    Are you guys just born like that? How does it work? How can you find another man attractive? Do you think like women?(with all the mood swings, emotional behaviour) etc?
    Every gay guy I know has said they always knew they were gay, it just took ages to come to terms with it. I suppose they find other men attractive the same way we find members of the opposite sex attractive, i wouldn't say it was unnatural just different. I'm not sure why they would think like women, the like men its not like they are like women. I don't know a gay person who has mood swings or emotional behaviour, to be honest you wouldnt know they were gay unless they told you.
    For some reason people seem to be under the impression that every gay person is overly camp like Alan Carr or something, but i know 14 gay people and not one of them is remotely like that.
    Hope some of this helps x
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    it sounds like you actually are tempted. Why else would you "imagine the kissing & anal sex"?
    those who are simply not gay, tend to get over it. those questioning themselves, tend to have uneasy feelings, like yourself.
    there's no shame in introspecting... take your time

    also, whatever the truth/ conslusion is, think how uncomfortable YOU would feel if somebody acted weird around you because of who you're dating, how you like to have sex or simply, because of who you are...
    it's not a nice feeling, is it?
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    How to get over it?
    Stop spending your time mentally visualising bum fun, and focus your attention onto your own life.

    Simples. :cool:
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    cool story bro
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    (Original post by impressionist89)
    no it shouldn't be illegal. As I said, I don't have anything against them, just wondering how they can think like that.
    They can think like that because different people are attracted to different things. Just like with anything else...some people like to play football, others hate it and would rather play rugby. I'm not saying that it's that simple, it's just an example.

    Why exactly do you automatically picture gay people having sex? I'd sort that issue out to be honest, and then the whole problem will probably clear itself up. I'm agreeing with others on this one - most of the people I know that have "turned" as it were, were originally disgusted with the idea of gay sex, and spent ages picturing it. Sounds like you're a bit fixated to me!
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    I'm pretty uncomfortable with the thought of heterosexual sex. Where do we go from here?
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    "Oh my god, he's gay. This means he wants me!"

    :rolleyes:
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    I always say you should let other people live their lives the way they wish. You probably do things that they'd never dream of doing, yet you don't find them posting threads online about it. Live and let live!
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    (Original post by impressionist89)
    I'm a straight male. I just can't fathom how people can be gay. I mean, the idea of kissing another man is utterly disgusting. Whenever I see a gay man, I always think of how they'd kiss another man and the anal sex and I mean, it just grosses me out. I don't hate gay people, but I'm very uncomfortable around them.
    I really want to get over this though. Any suggestions?
    Get some gay friends. I have quite a few because I do loads of theatre and after a while you start to kind of see what they mean when they say he's cute despite being totally straight myself. Sure the extremes will probably always be a bit WTF but most gay guys are just normal dudes who happen to not like boobs.
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    (Original post by impressionist89)
    Graham Norton. Nuff said
    Because every gay guy ever is a clone of Graham Norton :rolleyes:
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    Ok well I guess it's my turn to get shot down in flames...

    I have no issue with people being gay, I don't wanna infiltrate their love lives and the thought of anal sex is just not one that I like. I could never do the gay thing.

    What pisses me the **** off though is when gay guys make a big scene out of it. Have you noticed that? So many do it. I met a gay hairdresser once, he was ok though because he wasn't like childish and immature about it like a lot of gay people my age seem to be. You almost kinda have to wonder whether they actually ARE gay or not?? One of my "gay" friends (I'm putting that in inverted commas because I still believe he's only allegedly gay and it's all a front for him to make a scene about something for attention) has this profile picture on Facebook of him making out with his new bf.

    Not only that but all his bloody statuses are about him and they have heaps of xs on the posts and his bf has also changed his surname to my gay friend's surname too.

    It's like ok... it's their lives, fine, whatever, but it's a bit weird y'know??

    Being camp or whatever is one thing. Being gay is another thing. But making such a ****ing scene of it to the point where it seems like it's all just for attention, well that pisses me off and THEN it becomes something else for me.

    But all the same - I have nothing against people being gay/lesbian and I understand where these things come from but when you're almost fakin' it then jusssssst get the **** out.
    • PS Helper
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    (Original post by Lukely)
    Ok well I guess it's my turn to get shot down in flames...

    I have no issue with people being gay, I don't wanna infiltrate their love lives and the thought of anal sex is just not one that I like. I could never do the gay thing.

    What pisses me the **** off though is when gay guys make a big scene out of it. Have you noticed that? So many do it. I met a gay hairdresser once, he was ok though because he wasn't like childish and immature about it like a lot of gay people my age seem to be. You almost kinda have to wonder whether they actually ARE gay or not?? One of my "gay" friends (I'm putting that in inverted commas because I still believe he's only allegedly gay and it's all a front for him to make a scene about something for attention) has this profile picture on Facebook of him making out with his new bf.

    Not only that but all his bloody statuses are about him and they have heaps of xs on the posts and his bf has also changed his surname to my gay friend's surname too.

    It's like ok... it's their lives, fine, whatever, but it's a bit weird y'know??

    Being camp or whatever is one thing. Being gay is another thing. But making such a ****ing scene of it to the point where it seems like it's all just for attention, well that pisses me off and THEN it becomes something else for me.

    But all the same - I have nothing against people being gay/lesbian and I understand where these things come from but when you're almost fakin' it then jusssssst get the **** out.
    Well the thing is, its not 'gay people' being annoying, its annoying people being annoying.

    Im gay and i've had a few of these...camp/ annoying/ endlessly-attention-seeking people on facebook, and they dont stay there very long. No matter how many times they edit their bleach blonde hair or photoshop their photos and say ridiculously irrational things or lament about how they're going to commit suicide because they want a few comments. Gah, people are annoying.
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    (Original post by impressionist89)
    Umm no if I had to choose between Enrique Iglesias or Susan Boyle, I'd rather have a ****.
    Yeah, but if you couldn't have a **** you would go for Enrique, anyone would.

    (I don't see what's hot about celebrities but just for the sake of argument)
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    (Original post by Lukely)
    Ok well I guess it's my turn to get shot down in flames...

    I have no issue with people being gay, I don't wanna infiltrate their love lives and the thought of anal sex is just not one that I like. I could never do the gay thing.

    What pisses me the **** off though is when gay guys make a big scene out of it. Have you noticed that? So many do it. I met a gay hairdresser once, he was ok though because he wasn't like childish and immature about it like a lot of gay people my age seem to be. You almost kinda have to wonder whether they actually ARE gay or not?? One of my "gay" friends (I'm putting that in inverted commas because I still believe he's only allegedly gay and it's all a front for him to make a scene about something for attention) has this profile picture on Facebook of him making out with his new bf.

    Not only that but all his bloody statuses are about him and they have heaps of xs on the posts and his bf has also changed his surname to my gay friend's surname too.

    It's like ok... it's their lives, fine, whatever, but it's a bit weird y'know??

    Being camp or whatever is one thing. Being gay is another thing. But making such a ****ing scene of it to the point where it seems like it's all just for attention, well that pisses me off and THEN it becomes something else for me.

    But all the same - I have nothing against people being gay/lesbian and I understand where these things come from but when you're almost fakin' it then jusssssst get the **** out.
    I agree but you have to remember gays tend to be a bit behind everyone else relationship-wise as they've had the hurdle to get over. So an eighteen-year-old gay person might behave like a fourteen-year-old straight person in a relationship.

    Most of the gay people I've met have been immature and shy, and I really don't think homosexuality has to be innate, it can be reactive.
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    As for all the talk of immature and annoying gay people, there are vast swathes of annoying heterosexual twits too.
    My acquaintances form a fairly diverse mix on that front, and you get idiots in both camps.
    There are plenty of sensible people too though, many of whom you would not be able to guess their orientation when you met them.

    As for the OP, I suggest you try not to fantasise about what people get up to behind closed doors, at least in their presence, it can make things feel awkward.
    Concern yourself instead with the matter at hand, as if you were not aware of their bedroom preferences.

    Have you tried talking about your unease in person with a gay friend? Some frank may discussion dispel your uncertainty.
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    (Original post by Arekkusu)
    I agree but you have to remember gays tend to be a bit behind everyone else relationship-wise as they've had the hurdle to get over. So an eighteen-year-old gay person might behave like a fourteen-year-old straight person in a relationship.

    Most of the gay people I've met have been immature and shy, and I really don't think homosexuality has to be innate, it can be reactive.
    :facepalm:
    I'm embarrassed for you, mate.
    Can't believe you think that way.
 
 
 
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