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Ex (dumper) wants to "chat"? watch


    Simple answer - NO

    Alt Answer- She is lonely and in need for some male attention. Just tell her your busy with other stuff.

    Or she could genuinely just want to do exactly what she wants to do, which is chatting. Though if any hint of getting back together arises, let her know that its best if you stayed friends. Do not be soft on her, its better to completely make her aware that she and you both need to move on without any lingering feelings of "maybe if".

    (Original post by Warrior Queen)
    You missed the part where I said "if you go about it the right way"

    I.e. if he does what he is supposed to do and holds his ground, there shouldn't be a problem with meeting up with her. I didn't contradict myself.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I just said yeah no problem. Haha. Regret it already!
    The thing is, is that even if you both want to get back together 2 weeks is no time at all. You would both need much longer to get over your issues before even thinking about having a 'chat' in my opinion.

    Have you thought about the other things she might say... What if she's asking you if you mind if she dates again... What if she just explains again why you broke up and that's it, not hard feelings lets get on with our lives...

    They are the things I'd be thinking about which is why I wouldn't reply so soon. There is no way that 2 weeks after any relationship that I'd be able to meet the person and accept what they had to say without it messing me up completely.

    As others have said, if you go then only go for x-amount of time; an hour is a good time. Long enough to talk, but not so long that you're going to be falling for her again. Good luck, but be very careful, these are stormy waters that you're in.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I was with her 4 years. She walked out on me because I was suffocating her (I can see where she's coming from but it wasn't intentional).

    It's been a couple of weeks now and I haven't begged her back at all. We've text eachother twice about living arrangements and belongings in that time.

    When I text about my stuff I said it would be good to chat sometime, even by text, just to clear the air.

    I got my stuff and left her a note saying I saw where she was coming from and wished her luck in the future - I've accepted it's over.

    Last night I was pretty mangled but got a text saying I know you're away this week but it'd be good to meet up for a chat...

    HMMM! :rolleyes: What's my response?
    I feel your pain. My ex(!?) dumped me three months ago, i thought I would be fine as we argued a lot and things never seemed right.
    I was wrong, every day I miss her, think about her. Look through some of my previous threads on here and you'll get the idea. I was doing well, no contact. She got a new man a few weeks after we broke up which hurt like hell.
    She was up visiting friends over the weekend, I was out with mates. She saw me, called, text, all that jazz. So Last night, she suggests meeting up.
    I was stupid and I agreed. Went to a quiet pub, took part in the quiz, had a laugh, it was like old times, but there was a metre between us. Surreal.
    Then, we're in my car kissing, then, we're in her bed. It was amazing, so right.
    My point is, now I find myself in a bit of a headf**k. I now know that i still love her, and find myself wondering if she does too. I do feel bad for her new man, but right now, all I can think about is "us". She said she was glad it happened, but is now confused. Love Sucks!!!
    • #1
    • Thread Starter

    It'll be 3 weeks. I know why she became unhappy and I was becoming unhappy too. It was me and rather than be irrational and begged I've took a step back and thought about how I can be better. Whether that's for her or someone else.

    It became untenable so I understand why she left but I guess at this chat I can reassure her things would be different (not saying will) if we cleaned the slate.

    Although by the same token if she just wants to clear the air I could end up really getting in a mess by bringing these things up. Especially if she is moving on...
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