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    #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Boyfriend's got a sports society dinner in a couple weeks. It's a v exclusive restaurant, pretty expensive. Anyway, the invites say "partners discouraged". I mean, wtf is that about? :confused: Are girlfriends boring or something? :confused: There's a certain amount of places which they need to fill, and they won't fill it just with the society so there will have to be guests, and he's said he won't take me because it says partners discouraged. So that means he's going to take another girl. Not being funny, but he never takes me out to dinner, especially not posh places, and I'm not impressed that he's going to be paying for another girl to eat and drink at this expensive restaurant. Also, I'll be pretty suspicious of any girl he chooses to take; he doesn't have any good female friends, they're all like mates, so whichever one he chooses I'll be like :wtf?:

    SOooooo, opinions please!
    yer I totally agree with you, I'd be annoyed too.

    Actually my BF has done something like that, but *slightly* different. He once bought another girl a drink using MY money! :mad:

    But then he apologised and said it was a friend, it was her Bday etc so I had to forgive him :rolleyes:

    Anyway I would seriously talk to him about this, don't be afraid. This is definitely your business too! Good luck!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Boyfriend's got a sports society dinner in a couple weeks. It's a v exclusive restaurant, pretty expensive. Anyway, the invites say "partners discouraged". I mean, wtf is that about? :confused: Are girlfriends boring or something? :confused: There's a certain amount of places which they need to fill, and they won't fill it just with the society so there will have to be guests, and he's said he won't take me because it says partners discouraged. So that means he's going to take another girl. Not being funny, but he never takes me out to dinner, especially not posh places, and I'm not impressed that he's going to be paying for another girl to eat and drink at this expensive restaurant. Also, I'll be pretty suspicious of any girl he chooses to take; he doesn't have any good female friends, they're all like mates, so whichever one he chooses I'll be like :wtf?:

    SOooooo, opinions please!
    Sounds like the Americans... a bunch of frat boys planning an orgy perchance?

    If I were you I would crack the whip a bit, not that there is anything wrong with a guy having female friends, but this whole thing sounds decidedly dodgy.
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    (Original post by Helenia)
    To be honest, it's how sports socs work. I've never heard of "partners discouraged" but yes, they want to get eligible females there, to have a laugh with and so the single ones can try to pull them. They don't want couples laming out and the guys therefore not joining in with the "bonding" experience that is piss artist sports socials.

    This is probably harsh of me, but I go on these things, and while I'd NEVER cheat on my boyfriend, I'd equally never invite him to a formal swap (if we were inviting men from another college) - we can be couply on another occasion.

    I can understand you being upset about missing out on the nice restaurant etc - in which case, get him to take you on a separate occasion; unless you like sports boys getting pissed and rowdy and being made to feel like a spare part, you wouldn't actually like the dinner itself. But unless you don't trust him, don't worry about him taking another girl - it's weird, but as long as they're both clear on the boundaries, it doesn't have to be a problem.
    What Helenia says is quite sensible, I had not thought about it like that.
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    I think Helenia and Anon1 have valid points. I can see why Anon1 is annoyed, but also see now where the Soc is coming from.

    Anon1, do you have any friends that you know your boyfriend finds unattractive? As a compromise, perhaps he can go along with a girl of your choice
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    if you dont trust him after a year (if you trust him theres no need to get worried) then you never will and if he knows this then he'l get resentful believe me i know

    stop worrying about it if hes descent then nothings going to happen,
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    [QUOTE=Anonymous]

    Actually my BF has done something like that, but *slightly* different. He once bought another girl a drink using MY money! :mad:
    QUOTE]
    i would have chop his head off!:mad:
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    [QUOTE=speedstacker]
    (Original post by Anonymous)

    Actually my BF has done something like that, but *slightly* different. He once bought another girl a drink using MY money! :mad:
    QUOTE]
    i would have chop his head off!:mad:

    ha ha, love it
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Boyfriend's got a sports society dinner in a couple weeks. It's a v exclusive restaurant, pretty expensive. Anyway, the invites say "partners discouraged". I mean, wtf is that about? :confused: Are girlfriends boring or something? :confused: There's a certain amount of places which they need to fill, and they won't fill it just with the society so there will have to be guests, and he's said he won't take me because it says partners discouraged. So that means he's going to take another girl. Not being funny, but he never takes me out to dinner, especially not posh places, and I'm not impressed that he's going to be paying for another girl to eat and drink at this expensive restaurant. Also, I'll be pretty suspicious of any girl he chooses to take; he doesn't have any good female friends, they're all like mates, so whichever one he chooses I'll be like :wtf?:

    SOooooo, opinions please!
    It means no such thing.

    Have some faith in him. 'No partners' invites are quite common, the idea is that they all bond with each other rather than worry that their partner might feel left out.

    Sounds like you have little trust in your relationship. Also, if you hate the way he treats you, it beggers the question, why are you with him?
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    I have spoken to him about it and he isn't going to take another girl, but he doesn't see the problem with it :confused: He says if he got an invite saying "bring a guest" he doesn't see the problem with taking another girl, even if it didn't say partners discouraged. I don't understand what's wrong with him. Like if my dad didn't take my mum to a dinner or a party then it'd be totally seriously wrong!!! You know what I mean??

    No I wouldn't really want to go, because his friends are mostly immature dicks (I don't date him for his friends thank god). He compared it to my sports dinner (which was for team members only and no guests). Bah.

    I told him to take a male friend if he wanted to take a guest. After all, if it's not a date, it doesn't need to be a girl right??

    Still rather pissed off with the whole situation.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I have spoken to him about it and he isn't going to take another girl, but he doesn't see the problem with it :confused: He says if he got an invite saying "bring a guest" he doesn't see the problem with taking another girl, even if it didn't say partners discouraged. I don't understand what's wrong with him. Like if my dad didn't take my mum to a dinner or a party then it'd be totally seriously wrong!!! You know what I mean??

    No I wouldn't really want to go, because his friends are mostly immature dicks (I don't date him for his friends thank god). He compared it to my sports dinner (which was for team members only and no guests). Bah.

    I told him to take a male friend if he wanted to take a guest. After all, if it's not a date, it doesn't need to be a girl right??

    Still rather pissed off with the whole situation.
    Erm, yes, it does. Otherwise the rest of the sports club will think he's gay.

    It's not "a date" - but it's definitely not a couples occasion - hence making it more favourable for single people by bringing along extra girls.

    There's a difference between your parents (who are presumably married and have been for some time) and yourself and your boyfriend - not just in marital status but in your current social situations. If it were a friend's party then yes, you would possibly be expected to be invited. But for a sports social?

    The one thing I do think is odd is that he'd take someone other than you if it said "bring a guest" - that usually seems to imply partners are ok. But if it's a specifically no-couples occasion, then let him off the leash.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Helenia)
    The one thing I do think is odd is that he'd take someone other than you if it said "bring a guest" - that usually seems to imply partners are ok. But if it's a specifically no-couples occasion, then let him off the leash.
    Yeah that's the thing, it seems to have opened up a whole can of worms. He would take someone else apart from me. Like say I couldn't go to something, he would see no problem in taking another girl as his date. That's messed up. I feel... replaceable.

    I'm still not impressed with the social, I mean how rude is it to say you can't bring your girlfriend? So he's kinda said he won't take anyone else, but if he does then he'll take one of my best friends (the one he is good friends with he knows through her boyfriend - so she won't be at all interested in the guys anyway!).
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    Its a sports social...
    People might flirt a bit but at the end of the day its not a shag fest. I doubt many of the guys will actually get luckey anyway.
    Most sports socials are enjoyed by quite arrogent private school kids who plan what to do at it in the shower together
 
 
 
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