Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    could it be possible if this could be a slight scene change because at the start i had ben playing outside in the garden, but despite that please continue, but seeing that there are two ben's mentioned which one is karen's son
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    my muse has gone :unimpressed:
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    well in that case can someone else please rewrite this bit (.Ben had arrived home early, after his 45 minute PE class at school got cancelled. Ben was furious when he saw his favourite synthetic friends canoodling with his mother. In a moment of rage, Ben snatched Mr.Changeable away from Karen. But Mr. Changeable held on so tightly to Karen that her synthetic breast also became detached. Once Karen recovered from the shock and realised what had happened, she proceeded to break off Ben's arm.

    Karen and Ben then went to the nearest hospital which was 2 miles away from their 2 floor house. Ben was given a white cast. In order to prevent Ben from informing the authorities about how his injury had happened, Karen bribed him by allowing him to keep the breast which he had earlier torn off her robust rib cage) and make a slight scene change because at the start i had ben playing outside in the garden, but despite that please continue, but seeing that there are two ben's mentioned which one is karen's son also I think that Karen’s little day dream should come to an end, and her son ben should be in the story somewhere cause i would love to see him make an apparence, not only that but what is karen going to do with the toys after she's finished breastfeeding
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    memomemootoo i have taken the oppotunity to rewrite the bit that you did and here it is, but i'm sorry that it might not be as good as your or anyone elses ideas for the other parts of the story and the wording of it, not only that but it's about time that i added something

    Ben, suddenly Karen was snapped out of her day dream, as she turned round and saw that ben who had decide to come inside after he'd finished playing in the garden and was now standing next to her wondering what his mum was doing with his toy, as he snatched Mr changeable away from his mum, Karen put her top, bra, ring and bangles back on and she told him






    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    This thread... :nothing:
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    what has this got to do with my story, anyway can some one please continue where i left off cause i want to know what's going to happen next and what karen is going to tell him
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    "Ben i have something to tell you" said Karen as she tossed her flaxen locks. Her hairdresser had told her only the day before that her hair was blunt cut for easy maintenance and blow-waved to add waves to the ends for bounce and movement. The roots are teased at the crown making it a great hairstyle to frame a round face and will need a small amount of product for hold and shine.

    "What is it Mama ? i am sorry about your boobie btw ... that was just an accident"

    "Well Ben you know i said that your Daddy was kidnapped by aliens shortly before you were born ? And that he has been teleporting money to us from Alpha Centauri each month ?"

    "Yes Mama... it sounds strange but it must be true if you said so"

    "Well Sweetpea he actually works as a carpet fitter in Luton. He is living with an Internet Moderator called Jeff."

    "Mama that is disgusting... my Dad... living with a Moderator ?!?!?!?!"

    "I knew you would be upset Honeybunch so i waited until you were 7 before breaking the news to you... now here is £5; why don't you pop down to the Offie and buy us some Genuine Scrumpy Cider ?"

    "Thanks Mama you are totes awesome !! I will get some Doritos as well... "

    Name:  poollady7.jpg
Views: 86
Size:  66.8 KB
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    is this the end of the story i hope not cause i want to read some more soon, but until then here is a little bit more form me,

    As soon as ben had got back from the shops, not long after he'd popped the bag down by the door suddenly he heard crying so he went into the living room and saw his mum crying on the sofa ben walked over, sat down next to her and asked what was wrong, so she told him, "you know that i told you about your dad, well darling the real truth is that, both daddy and I split up just before you were born and the reason why is because daddy didn't want to have a child in our relationship and he was angry, I refused to get rid of you he decided to leave me and i never heard form that stupid man ever again, But we don't need anyone else do we darling cause me and you get along fine don't we

    to be continued by anyone who wants to continue the story from this point
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    "Mama don't cry" said Ben, anxiously fingering his shoulder-length locks, to which he had applied some of his mother's shampoo that very morning. Its luxurious golden camomile formula builds body and brings out natural highlights as it cleanses for fullness, bounce and radiant shine.
    Some of the ingredients seemed puzzling; Deionized water, coconut oil-corn oil soap, hydrolyzed soy protein (made from organic, non-GMO soybeans), organic aloe vera, carrageenan, Roman camomile oil, organic rosemary oil, organic sage oil; extracts of camomile, nettle, horsetail, coltsfoot, fennel, hops, balm mint, mistletoe and yarrow; panthenol (vitamin B-5), inositol, niacin, Aubrey's preservative (citrus seed extract, vitamins A, C and E), carrot oil.
    Ben hoped that they had not used a real horse tail. The mistletoe and carrot oil sounded nice.
    "Here Mama there is still some scrumpy left in the flagon. You can finish it. The Doritos have all gone. Sorry."
    "You are a good boy Ben" said his weepy parent "i can't believe that you are the son of that layabout North Korean. What was i thinking ? I could have had the pick of North London estate agents, but i fell for that wastrel at his so-called language school. I don't even remember why i wanted to learn Korean in the first place"
    "That's all in the past Mama" said Ben " we must look to the future. You are still a fine looking woman and your remaining boobie is very hot. I have taken the liberty of joining an online dating agency on your behalf. Your first date will be arriving in 45 minutes. He is called Albert and says he is an investment banker from Nigeria"

    "Ben you are so good to your mother. I cannot wait to meet Albert. Did he give any more information ? He must be minted if he is an investment banker. I cannot believe my good fortune !"
    "Yes Mama, he said that he has some very special news for you concerning a relative. He said it is very secret but soon you will be rich beyond your wildest dreams !! It is so exciting Mama. We will be able to buy decking and everything and enjoy the lifestyle which we both deserve. And Albert of course !! Where is Nigeria Mama ? Is it near Scotland ?"
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    has everyone run out of ideas or is this the end of the story i hope not, but it must come to an end some time and when it does should i start another story game
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    Dear Ben Friend,

    My name is Mr.Levine Alexanyan, an Armenia national. I work as an external auditor for Bank of Europe. I Work as part of a bigger team than Albert. My team covers the entire Eastern Europe and Spain region. I have taken pains to find your mother's contact through personal endeavours. Please inform Karen that I would very much enjoy to take her on date to a very expensive restaurant.

    I wish to discuss with her an issue of immense benefit to us both. Your prompt response will be highly appreciated. Contact me only through my private email address: [email protected]


    Kind Regards,


    Levine Alexanyan.
    Ernst & Young
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    Dear Ben's Mum
    We were very sorry you did not come to the meeting to discuss Ben's behaviour yesterday.
    It is unfair on the other year 4 students to have a drunkard in the classroom. He has encouraged some of the female students to drink scrumpy cider with him. Our anti - Thatcher protest was marred by your son shouting EDF slogans and smearing our banner with hair-care products. This morning he was in an inebriated state by breaktime and when I restrained him he hurled homophobic abuse at me.
    We understand that Ben has issues with your new partner from Nigeria; perhaps you would like the council to offer Ben some multicultural awareness training ?
    In the meantime I must regretfully suspend Ben until you can prove that he has overcome the challenges he faces.
    Yours sincerely

    Grace Ubunga-Shufflebotham

    Head Teacher

    St Jude's Primary Education Node

    South Norwood

    "making your child's dreams come true every day"
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by the bear)
    Dear Ben's Mum
    We were very sorry you did not come to the meeting to discuss Ben's behaviour yesterday.
    It is unfair on the other year 4 students to have a drunkard in the classroom. He has encouraged some of the female students to drink scrumpy cider with him. Our anti - Thatcher protest was marred by your son shouting EDF slogans and smearing our banner with hair-care products. This morning he was in an inebriated state by breaktime and when I restrained him he hurled homophobic abuse at me.
    We understand that Ben has issues with your new partner from Nigeria; perhaps you would like the council to offer Ben some multicultural awareness training ?
    In the meantime I must regretfully suspend Ben until you can prove that he has overcome the challenges he faces.
    Yours sincerely

    Grace Ubunga-Shufflebotham

    Head Teacher

    St Jude's Primary Education Node

    South Norwood

    "making your child's dreams come true every day"
    :rofl:
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    can someone please continue the story and who ever does can they please put a bit more detail so that it would help to build up a better picture
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    :llama:
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by memomemootoo)
    :llama:
    :badger:
    Offline

    14
    (Original post by the bear)
    :badger:
    That's not a bear - it's a badger. :hand:

    *Subscribes* :ninja:
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by memomemootoo)
    :llama:
    Name:  Hylas_Waterhouse3.jpg
Views: 87
Size:  143.6 KB


    :badger: <----- genuine Siberian Water Bear FYI
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    I hate to interupt but can we please continue the story
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: May 19, 2015
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Brussels sprouts
    Useful resources

    Quick link:

    Unanswered creative corner threads

    Groups associated with this forum:

    View associated groups
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.