Kissed/touched another guy but does my boyfriend have to know?

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Beautifully put.

I'd would just like to add and emphasise that nobody deserves to be cheated on.

When he looks at you he sees a girl that he probably thinks is amazing and perfect, but really you are just a ****ing liar. You tell him everything and let him decide what to do. Can't believe ur asking random peoples advice rather than tell him.

PS Your friends are cows also.

Oh yeah, I forgot about them. Utter bastards. It is not "nothing". It has shown the OP for what she is: a cheat.

Reply 21

username1042689

Original post by im so academic

So because you didn't have sex with him it's all OK? Would you have been happy for your boyfriend to have done the same?

That's pathetic. He deserves better than that, and I hope he finds out (one way or another) and gets rid of you. People shouldn't be treated like that.

Don't play "oh it's so unlike me" bull****. You did it.

ISA, you get a lot of flak on this site, but this comment is spot on. There's no use trying to rationalise OP's actions.

OP, I know you're not the Antichrist, but it's been taken out of your hands now. You feel guilty, well...it will hurt him, but telling him and letting him exact his own judgement over the situation is frankly what you deserve. You cheated on him, you owe it to him to at least tell him the truth.

Reply 22

Zarek

Original post by im so academic

So if your girlfriend did the same thing, it would be OK, right?

If she wasn't happy in her relationship, she still should have shown him some respect by breaking up previously.

Check out my post again, I certainly didn't say it was ok.

Regarding your question, of course I would be unhappy and angry but I can conceive in some circumstances I might forgive.

Reply 23

LtNoddy

Original post by Anonymous

What do you guys think I should do?

I think the correct thing to do would be to tell him. Guilt can eat away at you if you decide not to tell him and will hurt you more in the long term. Explain to him what happened and why, and how bad you feel about it. Maybe even allow him some space to think about it. Things like these do happen and some couples do get over it!

The way i see it, honesty is the ONLY policy.

Oh and ignore the replies that are telling you that you are evil, mistakes happen to us all, its whether or not you choose to face them or not that determines if you're in the right or the wrong!

Reply 24

im so academic

Original post by Zarek

Check out my post again, I certainly didn't say it was ok.

Regarding your question, of course I would be unhappy and angry but I can conceive in some circumstances I might forgive.

Really? Could you express what you thought without beating about the bush?

Be more specific. What circumstances would you forgive (and presumably take her back)?

Oh. If she were hot enough, right? :rolleyes:

Reply 25

HashimKF

No respect for people like you. Tell him so he can dump you sooner rather than later.

Oh and you can tell your friends they're pricks for advising you to lie. I hope they all get cheated on. Sex or not it's still cheating.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 26

beccagood95

I don't think anyone can make this decision but you...
Now that you've done this, you have to seriously consider your relationship.
1.How serious are you? Do you plan to be with him the rest of your life? If so, you can't sit on a lie like that. If not, he still deserves respect and the truth.
2. If you were willing to cheat, does that mean you aren't happy? Now that you've done it once, you have the potential to do it again and it's most likely that he isn't the one for you.
3. How do you think he will react? Is he sensitive? Jealous? His character is something you would have to consider. If you think telling the truth would harm him more than he is able to cope with, even though it isn't the honourable thing to do you may not be able to tell him directly. But you can't do nothing.
4. What would you do if he cheated on you?

And if you do choose to tell him, I think that you have to be prepared to face the consequences. I think it's hard to take someone back after something like that. And you're going to have to carefully think about how you'd tell him. Although there's no easy way to say it, there are definitely bad ways to tell him.

It's easy to call you names, and to tell you things you already know, but what's been done is done and you should definitely learn from this experience. Be aware of your actions and their consequences in the future.

Reply 27

LtNoddy

Original post by Zarek

What a linch mob response these type of posts throw up - you don't even know anything about the relationship. Sure it is not a good thing and you should 'fess up to your boyfriend and take the consequences, whatever they may be. But these things do happen - in my experience men and women can be equally as susceptible. People are fallible in this area with out always being irredeemable. I also think there is a sliding scale of seriousness from thoughts, flirting, kissing, sex, and sometimes demeanours can be forgiven.

Spot on mate, Seems you may be one of the only people here realising how important relationships are to some people.

Reply 28

michael clayton

Original post by Zarek

Check out my post again, I certainly didn't say it was ok.

Regarding your question, of course I would be unhappy and angry but I can conceive in some circumstances I might forgive.

No one can say they'd forgive unless they've experienced being the one cheated on. Once something like this has happened, you can never 100% trust that person again and it will hang over you for the rest of your relationship.

There are no excuses, especially not drunkenness; you are responsible for your own actions. Every time, the best thing to do is to part ways and move on from the relationship imo.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 29

dav14

Original post by im so academic

Agreed.

I have no sympathy for the OP. Why would you ruin a relationship by cheating on your boyfriend who's been faithful to you all this time?

You know what? In a way I'm glad this happened sooner or later as now the boyfriend has seen the OP's true colours and get rid as soon as possible.

The thing is, I would bet the OP doesnt tell her BF f-all. Because if she had the balls to do so and really knew the diff between right n wrong, she would have done so, or at least not asked us.

I seen a saying yesterday that is really good that applies here: If you tell the truth it becomes part of your past. If you lie it becomes part of your future.

I feel sorry for the guy who's being lied to.

Reply 30

Zarek

Original post by dav14

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 31

CosmicVengeance

Slut

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 32

overthelove

If you have respect for him and for yourself, you should tell him.

Reply 33

Rooster523

Original post by LtNoddy

Spot on mate, Seems you may be one of the only people here realising how important relationships are to some people.

If her relationship was THAT important she wouldn't've cheated.

/thread

Reply 34

desdemonata

Tell him. You've already screwed up by doing it, and again by pretending to yourself it's nothing and debating whether to tell him. Don't add to that cock up by trying to keep it from him. Not only is it likely that it will get back to him, but he deserves to know.

And don't kid yourself that it's not like you. It clearly is. One guy came onto you and you got with him. Clearly you don't have the best self control. It's still cheating even if you don't sleep with them :dry:

and your boyfriend needs to know you are capable of getting with somebody drunk.

Also you probably just made all the guys on TSR with girlfriends worry...

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 35

LtNoddy

Original post by Rooster523

If her relationship was THAT important she wouldn't've cheated.

I'm in no way supporting what she has done, on the contrary condoning it, But sometimes mistakes do happen? Not everyone is perfect and sometimes people slip up. It's whether or not you actually face what you have done that matters.

If the OP does do something about this and faces her boyfriend then good for her. If not, then she is pretty silly.

Reply 36

Devolved-Alchemist

OP, it sounds like you f**ked up. For the sake of your dignity and out of respect for your boyfriend, you ought to tell him. Then, the ball is in his court.

However, I'd like to suggest that everyone else throwing insults at the OP should show some restraint. Despite the wrongness of her actions, a couple of the comments on here are bordering on bullying. We can critique another person's actions without being vulgar about it.

Reply 37

Mr Advice

People like the OP are the lowest of low. They think it's acceptable to go behind the person they supposedly love and do all sorts with another person. And then they emphasise by using capital letters that they did NOT sleep with that person. So what if you emphasise it? You still kissed and sexually touched the guy. They also try to make themselves feel better by saying it's uncharacteristic of them. You having a laugh? You did it, you did it. It's who you are. A murderer is a murderer; a thief is a thief; a cheat is a cheat. It's who you are.

OP, you're a twisted and cunning individual. Sick, to be honest. I hate disloyal people - you enter into a relationship on trust and if someone breaks that by going behind their other half, I lose all respect for them.

Tell him. For his sake. So he knows the real you.

Posted from TSR Mobile

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 38

im so academic

Original post by LtNoddy

A mistake is not adding numbers correctly or writing down the wrong address - not consciously deciding to kiss and get intimate with someone.

Reply 39

Zarek

Original post by LtNoddy

Spot on mate, Seems you may be one of the only people here realising how important relationships are to some people.

I see you and I are on the same wavelength. But we are somewhat in the minority!

I am amazed at how many posters are foaming at the mouth and using language almost as reprehensible as the crime confessed.