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why don't educated, ''high flying'' career women marry ''down''? watch

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    Welcome to the real world mate. When these high flying women notice that their biological clock is ticking and are almost dried up,so to speak, you get the 'old lady at a club' phenomenon.
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    (Original post by donutaud15)
    silly me I thought marriage was mostly about love, not whose earning what. :rolleyes:

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    That's why we have women who abuse the system and fleece the man of his current and future wealth through child support and alimony?

    Originally marriage was never about love it was a way for a man to ensure that the children were his and the woman is taken care of during and after the pregnancy. Marriage being about love is a fairly new concept.
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    (Original post by arkhamz)
    Welcome to the real world mate. When these high flying women notice that their biological clock is ticking and are almost dried up,so to speak, you get the 'old lady at a club' phenomenon.
    As an unfortunate recipient of their advances, I can assure you that instead of feeling egotistical about it and finding it funny... I find it exceedingly sad. In the sense that it is just a mockery of what a healthy society should be. Many of them are old enough to be my mother.
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    (Original post by Dumachi)
    Marriage is in pieces thanks to law changes that allows a women to win in just about every way imaginable should things mess up. Infact women can if they like leave through "boredom" using a no fault divorce and talk half a guys earnining and his kids.

    Marriage is finished very soon if things don't change, even my parents agree.
    (Original post by puma21)
    That's why we have women who abuse the system and fleece the man of his current and future wealth through child support and alimony?

    Originally marriage was never about love it was a way for a man to ensure that the children were his and the woman is taken care of during and after the pregnancy. Marriage being about love is a fairly new concept.
    I'm not denying that there are women who marries for money but from what I've seen so far, divorce is not exactly what a bride is thinking on her wedding day.

    And as for marriage for love being a new concept yes that's true, but it's a concept now because people have found that marriages tend to be better if the couple has feelings for each other.

    Anyway I'm not here to debate, just find it really depressing that this is what some people's view of marriage.

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    (Original post by uberteknik)
    One could also ask: 'why don't powerful and successful men settle down with mingers?'
    check the list of the richest men in the world and their wives. only a tiny percent are married to supermodel types. most are still with the same average looking woman after 30-50 years, their high-school sweetheart etc

    look at zuckerberg's wife, the guy is worth 20 gazillion ffs lol
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    (Original post by donutaud15)
    I'm not denying that there are women who marries for money but from what I've seen so far, divorce is not exactly what a bride is thinking on her wedding day.

    And as for marriage for love being a new concept yes that's true, but it's a concept now because people have found that marriages tend to be better if the couple has feelings for each other.

    Anyway I'm not here to debate, just find it really depressing that this is what some people's view of marriage.

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    I am not disagreeing with that, marriage can be a very rewarding experience. But the laws are depressing and leave a guy extremely vulnerable because of it, No fault divorces is half to blame. Heck it isnt even only womens fault the laws are this way, what stupid men let it happen is what disgusts me?

    It just seems more and more bad choices after another, this doesn't feel like a free world. Feels like a world full of a bunch of plebs running the show and 2 classes of people (high and low)
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    As has already been mentioned, women are hypergamous. They want to marry men who are at least as well educated and successful as they are. If they marry a supportive beta male househusband they will lose attraction for him, stop providing sex, and probably divorce him or try to have an affair with the high quality, powerful men around her at work.

    Why are women hypergamous? They are far more reproductively valuable than men (eggs are rare, sperm is extremely common; women also invest far more into making a baby than men do). They evolved to want the best possible genes for their child and the best resources to provide and protect them both.

    (Men conversely are polygamous and want to impregnate as many women as possible. )

    Unfortunately for women, their hypergamy makes it extremely difficult to reach the top levels of power. They tend to refuse to marry a supportive husband who would help them get there, while the most ambitious men marry supportive wives who help them reach the top. (Of course, if a woman uses her youth, beauty and femininity to marry well, she can have all the benefits of wealth and power without actually having to work for them - unlike men who have to work extremely hard and take successful risks to become wealthy and powerful.)
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    (Original post by Dumachi)
    I am not disagreeing with that, marriage can be a very rewarding experience. But the laws are depressing and leave a guy extremely vulnerable because of it, No fault divorces is half to blame. Heck it isnt even only womens fault the laws are this way, what stupid men let it happen is what disgusts me?

    It just seems more and more bad choices after another, this doesn't feel like a free world. Feels like a world full of a bunch of plebs running the show and 2 classes of people (high and low)
    agree with that.

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    I often think that as women, we have shot ourselves a little in the foot by campaigning so hard for equality. Because what we've actually achieved is that yes, we're able to go to work and do well in a career - but we're still expected to do all of the child rearing at the same time! I'm fairly sure that this isn't what the ladies burning their bras had in mind.

    I do see a few stay at home men though, and that's great for them. But people ***** about their partners saying they don't understand how they can leave their partner raising their baby while they "abandon" them at work.

    So we haven't achieved equality, we've achieved a situation where it's harder to balance everything we want than ever, and it seems that still the only chance to achieve true harmony is to pick between one or the other. Child or career.

    I'm sure there are many women who juggle both, so don't quote me with examples haha. But many of those women will go on to regret not spending as much time with their children, or even not climbing higher up the career ladder.
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    (Original post by Mr_Vain)
    Tbh, i see huge amounts (i can't predict how many) of the next generation heading for a Japan-like scenario. Where they effectively just stop trying with these women and just live their lives and get sexual gratification through other means. E.g. Prostitutes, hentai, other weird **** or just abstaining altogether. With that obviously comes more social problems. I seriously worry for the next generation because it seems as though people are starting to realise that "relationships" never really end well or make one happy in the end. If my views seem over the top, then ignore them, i am not a futurist. However, it is a reasoned estimation that I have.

    this is already happening in the west but obv not to the same extent. in japan, they are called ''herbivore'' men. women have such unrealistic and materialistic standards that many men have given up, realising it's a race they can't win and even if they did it wouldn't be worth the effort.

    Herbivore men is a social phenomenon in Japan of men who shun marriage or gaining a girlfriend. As of September 2010, 36% of Japanese men between the ages of 16 and 19 perceived themselves in this way. Additionally, two surveys of single men in their 20s and 30s found that 61% and 70%, respectively, considered themselves grass-eating men.
    and yes, it's a very worrying trend for the future. not just because of the low birth rates, but also because men will stop feeling motivated and have a sense of self-worth and achievement . society and the economy will suffer badly, to what extent it remains to be seen. social engineers will have a lot to answer for.
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    (Original post by drake10)
    As has already been mentioned, women are hypergamous. They want to marry men who are at least as well educated and successful as they are. If they marry a supportive beta male househusband they will lose attraction for him, stop providing sex, and probably divorce him or try to have an affair with the high quality, powerful men around her at work.

    Why are women hypergamous? They are far more reproductively valuable than men (eggs are rare, sperm is extremely common; women also invest far more into making a baby than men do). They evolved to want the best possible genes for their child and the best resources to provide and protect them both.

    (Men conversely are polygamous and want to impregnate as many women as possible. )

    Unfortunately for women, their hypergamy makes it extremely difficult to reach the top levels of power. They tend to refuse to marry a supportive husband who would help them get there, while the most ambitious men marry supportive wives who help them reach the top. (Of course, if a woman uses her youth, beauty and femininity to marry well, she can have all the benefits of wealth and power without actually having to work for them - unlike men who have to work extremely hard and take successful risks to become wealthy and powerful.)
    To a point, because i personally know a girl from a family who are extremely wealthy (they used to be the wealthiest in Hong Kong) and she maintains that when a woman enters such a relationship it is always for a price. And of course, such men are all the more likely to have mistresses and generally ignore her. Men with these resources hold all of the cards.
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    (Original post by enthuziazmz)
    this is already happening in the west but obv not to the same extent. in japan, they are called ''herbivore'' men. women have such unrealistic and materialistic standards that many men have given up, realising it's a race they can't win and even if they did it wouldn't be worth the effort.



    and yes, it's a very worrying trend for the future. not just because of the low birth rates, but also because men will stop feeling motivated and have a sense of self-worth and achievement . society and the economy will suffer badly, to what extent it remains to be seen. social engineers will have a lot to answer for.
    Since i just mentioned Hong Kong in another post, Hong Kong is another example of this. It is VERY money/status centric over there. Birth rates are low of course and the government afaik has financial incentives for starting families. And yet, i really doubt the native HK'ers are going to take this as a good enough incentive to get married. Socially, it is pretty ****ed up.

    I see this next generation of men as inheriting a huge identity crisis akin to that of those men decades ago who had to consider a world where it was gradually more accepted that there might not be a God.
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    Oh god am I really reading this?, a successful woman can marry who she wishes. Chances are they are highly ambitious and have a certain drive, so of course they are more than likely going to be attracted to the same qualities in a man.

    I am highly ambitious and intend to be successful, I will not stop until I am, I would not 'marry down' just so my husband could stay at home if we had children, that logic is stupid.
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    (Original post by enthuziazmz)
    and yes, it's a very worrying trend for the future. not just because of the low birth rates, but also because men will stop feeling motivated and have a sense of self-worth and achievement . society and the economy will suffer badly, to what extent it remains to be seen. social engineers will have a lot to answer for.
    The end result of these trends:


    Transcript:
    http://owningyour****.blogspot.co.uk/2012/03/transcript-of-fempocalypse.html


    (Original post by Mr_Vain)
    Men with these resources hold all of the cards.
    Time for me to get back to work and get closer to becoming superrich! :borat:
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    (Original post by enthuziazmz)
    everyone knows that having kids affects women's career big time. so why don't these women marry men who will stay at home with the kids since they make enough money to support the whole family? men have been marrying ''down'' since forever and still do. so why don't women do it and continue their careers?
    Where's your evidence that they don't? :s

    Also given the gender roles in place in society men may feel threatened by marrying someone with a better career and higher intelligence so even if it was the case there's nothing to say it's the women's choice.
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    (Original post by Pan's-Labyrinth)
    Oh god am I really reading this?, a successful woman can marry who she wishes. Chances are they are highly ambitious and have a certain drive, so of course they are more than likely going to be attracted to the same qualities in a man.
    A successful woman can marry who she wishes... as long as he also wants to marry her. Men prefer young, beautiful, feminine women over successful women though. Many successful women who've spent their twenties focused on their education and career find that the successful, ambitious men around them in their thirties don't want them and instead want women in their twenties.

    I am highly ambitious and intend to be successful, I will not stop until I am, I would not 'marry down' just so my husband could stay at home if we had children, that logic is stupid.
    Let's say you have children. Who will look after them?
    1. You do. You take time off work and your career suffers.
    2. He does. You probably lose attraction for him.
    3. You get women on the minimum wage who don't care about your children to look after them. Your children suffer.

    It is extremely difficult for a woman to have a high-flying career, successful marriage, and happy, well-brought up children.
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    (Original post by Pan's-Labyrinth)
    Oh god am I really reading this?, a successful woman can marry who she wishes. Chances are they are highly ambitious and have a certain drive, so of course they are more than likely going to be attracted to the same qualities in a man.

    I am highly ambitious and intend to be successful, I will not stop until I am, I would not 'marry down' just so my husband could stay at home if we had children, that logic is stupid.
    I really don't mean to offend. But, i don't think you'll have an option but to marry down. You see, you're not particularly attractive right now. You're 22, you're probably going to take a few years to get this success you want. Before you know it you are 30. Now, as I am a male who is heading towards success and I will also be 30 (we're the same age) would I really go for you or would I rather go for the younger girls who most likely do not have so much baggage either as the average 30 year old single woman? In terms of a trade, you're pretty much a depreciating asset.
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    (Original post by redferry)
    Where's your evidence that they don't? :s

    Also given the gender roles in place in society men may feel threatened by marrying someone with a better career and higher intelligence so even if it was the case there's nothing to say it's the women's choice.
    did you read the thread and the stats in the links? the vast majority of women with status and wealth don't want to marry down. and you don't think a huge number of guys would want to marry a millionaire? there would be a line from here to timbuktu.
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    (Original post by drake10)
    A successful woman can marry who she wishes... as long as he also wants to marry her. Men prefer young, beautiful, feminine women over successful women though. Many successful women who've spent their twenties focused on their education and career find that the successful, ambitious men around them in their thirties don't want them and instead want women in their twenties.


    Let's say you have children. Who will look after them?
    1. You do. You take time off work and your career suffers.
    2. He does. You probably lose attraction for him.
    3. You get women on the minimum wage who don't care about your children to look after them. Your children suffer.

    It is extremely difficult for a woman to have a high-flying career, successful marriage, and happy, well-brought up children.
    You are making a hella lot of assumptions and bold statements here.

    Yes some successful men may not want a successful woman, they may want a trophy girlfriend who is young and naive! However successful women can be just as attractive, fun and can offer the same if not more than a young woman.

    I am 22 so I suppose I am the 'young, naive' woman right now, but I can tell you something for free, I am not going to stop myself from being successful or becoming a high flyer just in case men won't want me. There is someone for everyone, successful or not, just look at Jeremy Kyle.

    When I have children I will be financially stable and at a point in my career where I could afford to take a year or two off. If my husband is working to even better, this is where grandparents come into the equation, of course they will not always be able to look after them. But whether you are a high flyer or not most women still work, therefore not being at home all the time.
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    (Original post by enthuziazmz)
    did you read the thread and the stats in the links? the vast majority of women with status and wealth don't want to marry down. and you don't think a huge number of guys would want to marry a millionaire? there would be a line from here to timbuktu.
    Did you post any statistics on how many men wouldn't want to marry someone who earns more than them?

    Ill have a look at the stats you posted now
 
 
 
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