Tell him if you want.(Original post by Anonymous)
I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for around 5 months. I was diagnosed with PCOS over a year ago and I am wondering whether to tell him. I am extremely self-conscious about my body, in particular the acne, hairiness and excess weight associated with PCOS. My symptoms are quite mild compared to a lot of people with the condition, but it's still enough to really bother me. Also I have really small breasts (barely a B), which is likely to be related to the PCOS, and I am even more self-conscious about that. I wear push-up bras which helps, but they still look quite small and it means he will have to find out they are even smaller than that! I sometimes feel so insecure about this stuff that I don't let him touch me in particular places and when he asks me why I say it's because I feel fat etc. Even when he just puts his hand up my back I sometimes say don't because it's hairy or spotty which I know sounds ridiculous. I wish I wasn't so insecure about stuff. He has been quite patient about it up until now, but is starting to suggest that we go further with things which makes me feel rather worried. I am nervous about stuff like this anyway because it is my first relationship, but this makes it worse. I have already told him that I have a hormonal imbalance, but he says that's not very specific and I don't know whether to tell him the full story. I also told him that a lot of people take the pill to help with the symptoms, but I haven't because of the risks. I might end up doing that anyway. I trust him and sort of want to tell him because it would explain a lot and might make him understand how I feel. But I am worried about how he will react. The thing that worries me the most is the fact that people with PCOS often have fertility issues. I know it's not impossible to have children, and there are treatments which can help, but it is common for people with PCOS to have difficulty conceiving. The main thing I want out of my life is to have children and I know he wants children too so this might put him off me. If we did by any chance have a future together, I don't know whether it's better to be honest about it, or wait and see if I do have problems and then explain, because otherwise he might be half expecting there to be problems from the start. Thank you in advance for any advice.
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Should I tell my boyfriend I have polycystic ovary syndrome? watch
- 24-01-2014 17:48
- 24-01-2014 21:18
So, if the relationship is deepening, I would tell him and discuss it. Just by way of reassurance, clearly if you have been together this long the physical things you describe can't be an issue for him. PCOS is pretty common and doesn't affect femininity and usually isn't a problem, or at least not an unsolvable problem, with fertility.
- 26-01-2014 11:50
hey there. I understand what you're going through as about a week ago I was diagnosed with PCOS as well. It explained a lot of what had been going on such as my craving for sugar, excessive hair growth, weight gain, tiredness, irregular periods and unbearable menstrual pain. I have been dating my boyfriend for about two months now but he is significantly older than me… Like you, I thought about whether or not I should confront him with my problem and I did. He reassured me of everything and said, "we'll get through this", which was really supportive and made me feel a lot stronger. I hope this helped!