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Guy (25) going out with a divorced single mother (19) Watch

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    (Original post by Zenomorph)
    She got issues
    How is that having issues? Many people from ALL walks of life are divorced and have kids with different people, and many people are in interracial relationships. Your ignorance is hurting me.
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    (Original post by Novascope)
    Omg THIS. I see so many people on here stressing over irrelevant and petty things. How is this relationship going to bother the OP. Just another idiot trying to cause trouble.
    +1

    ohmygosh this, totally agree, OP needs to mind his own damn business :yep:
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    (Original post by MidnightDream)
    +1

    ohmygosh this, totally agree, OP needs to mind his own damn business :yep:
    Exactly, he's a clear racist too. So bloody what if he'll become "step uncle" I'm pretty sure that child wouldn't even want an uncle like him anyway. I sure wouldn't.
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    (Original post by donutaud15)
    1. What's wrong with an illegitimate interracial child? Also you said she was divorced so the child isn't illegitimate. And since this thread is all about voicing out then I must say your archaic view of illegitimacy (you won't mention it as an issue if you didn't see it as negative) is abhorrent. This is coming from a ******* child (and damn proud of it) who have dealt with bigots like yourself.

    2. You really have no say whatsoever if they marry. You're not part of the couple so tough luck buddy. Haha.




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    Tad racist? Definitely not. The reason I bring up race has nothing to do with race discrimination. Also, I have my suspicions about the child and whether she was ever married. I've left out a key bit of information which would make this much clearer, but I can't divulge that information (or I'm very reluctant to) because I don't want to reveal too much about her.

    I'm not a bigot or a racist, you have misunderstood my concerns. The problem here is that there's interracial mixing. I'm completely against interracial mixing of any type. When I say mixing, I am of course referring to procreation and creating children. I'm not referring to different races coexisting together, that's not my point here.

    You don't seem to understand the implications here. Marrying a woman who already has a child (she's been with someone else) who may very well have been born to an unwed couple...it's truly horrific. I'm not going to give any more details to clarify the situation like I've already said, in the interest of protecting their identities, I don't want to provide all the specifics.
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    Am gonna be cheesy-acidy here.

    If two people love each other, than screw anyone else.
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    (Original post by Novascope)
    Exactly, he's a clear racist too. So bloody what if he'll become "step uncle" I'm pretty sure that child wouldn't even want an uncle like him anyway. I sure wouldn't.
    I know right but he won't admit it :laugh:
    My sympathies are with the child :yep: he doesn't deserve to have uncle like that :sadnod:
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    (Original post by Stinkum)
    Tad racist? Definitely not. The reason I bring up race has nothing to do with race discrimination. Also, I have my suspicions about the child and whether she was ever married. I've left out a key bit of information which would make this much clearer, but I can't divulge that information (or I'm very reluctant to) because I don't want to reveal too much about her.

    I'm not a bigot or a racist, you have misunderstood my concerns. The problem here is that there's interracial mixing. I'm completely against interracial mixing of any type. When I say mixing, I am of course referring to procreation and creating children. I'm not referring to different races coexisting together, that's not my point here.

    You don't seem to understand the implications here. Marrying a woman who already has a child (she's been with someone else) who may very well have been born to an unwed couple...it's truly horrific. I'm not going to give any more details to clarify the situation like I've already said, in the interest of protecting their identities, I don't want to provide all the specifics.
    "I'm not a bigot or a racist, you have misunderstood my concerns. The problem here is that there's interracial mixing. I'm completely against interracial mixing of any type. When I say mixing, I am of course referring to procreation and creating children. I'm not referring to different races coexisting together, that's not my point here."

    That is racist though... What's so wrong with people mixing? You can't say you're fine with different races coexisting, knowing the fact that as humans we cannot control who we love. So it's common sense to know that in life, people will mix. At the end of the day, as long as those parents are doing right by that child, and helping it grow into a good person why does it matter if that child is mixed? Please, start worrying over things that actually matter and are important in life.
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    (Original post by Stinkum)
    Tad racist? Definitely not. The reason I bring up race has nothing to do with race discrimination. Also, I have my suspicions about the child and whether she was ever married. I've left out a key bit of information which would make this much clearer, but I can't divulge that information (or I'm very reluctant to) because I don't want to reveal too much about her.

    I'm not a bigot or a racist, you have misunderstood my concerns. The problem here is that there's interracial mixing. I'm completely against interracial mixing of any type. When I say mixing, I am of course referring to procreation and creating children. I'm not referring to different races coexisting together, that's not my point here.

    You don't seem to understand the implications here. Marrying a woman who already has a child (she's been with someone else) who may very well have been born to an unwed couple...it's truly horrific. I'm not going to give any more details to clarify the situation like I've already said, in the interest of protecting their identities, I don't want to provide all the specifics.
    I have an issue with the bolded parts, firstly what is wrong with interracial mixing?
    What so just because she's been married and had a child she can't have another go at happiness?
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    (Original post by Stinkum)
    Tad racist? Definitely not. The reason I bring up race has nothing to do with race discrimination. Also, I have my suspicions about the child and whether she was ever married. I've left out a key bit of information which would make this much clearer, but I can't divulge that information (or I'm very reluctant to) because I don't want to reveal too much about her.

    I'm not a bigot or a racist, you have misunderstood my concerns. The problem here is that there's interracial mixing.

    You don't seem to understand the implications here. Marrying a woman who already has a child (she's been with someone else) who may very well have been born to an unwed couple...it's truly horrific. I'm not going to give any more details to clarify the situation like I've already said, in the interest of protecting their identities, I don't want to provide all the specifics.
    maybe you should ask to see her paperwork, that'll perhaps satisfy your disbelief on her marital status.

    also I called you a bigot not because of your seemingly racist opinions but on what I perceived as negativity towards illegitimate people. here's a definition just in case you need one: bigot: noun

    1. a person who is utterly intolerant of any differing creed, belief, or opinion.

    finally i think that if you don't want to divulge the whole story then you shouldn't bother posting abhorrent threads asking for advice. unless you like being called a despicable human being, in which case by all means go post.


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    (Original post by MidnightDream)
    I have an issue with the bolded parts, firstly what is wrong with interracial mixing?
    What so just because she's been married and had a child she can't have another go at happiness?
    It's her life, I didn't say she should abandon all hope and stop living. But this guy should not get involved in a relationship with such a person, considering all the circumstances. I've kept completely silent about it and haven't said a word, but I really don't want to see this carry on. I fear it may be heading towards a long term relationship, possibly even marriage. And because I'm involved/affected by the situation, you can understand why I'd be disturbed.

    He should leave her, and she should find someone else who is of the same race as her and of a similar cultural background. It's as simple as that.

    Also, there are religious and family matters that are important in this situation, but I can't get into it.
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    (Original post by MidnightDream)
    she has a child from another man So what?
    she's a different race to the guy And? are we a tad racist now?
    completely different cultural backgrounds Why does this matter?
    and they shouldn't really be in a relationship ​Because you say so?
    Oh Jesus Christ, green now?! :shades: Proper points you've made though.
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    (Original post by ApeMob)
    Oh Jesus Christ, green now?! :shades: Proper points you've made though.
    Was feeling the green today :laugh:

    thanks :grin:
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    Op, Op, Op :nah: Yes the 19 divorced and with child thing is a bit exotic to people but I don't see the issues with the other details. You're dismissed.
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    Two year old child and divorced at 19?

    Wow.
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    (Original post by Zenomorph)
    1st off stop putting words into my mouth.

    She may have a problem with her father, with men, thus she wants ' revenge ', only problem is when you divorce someone , there are innocent victims - children.

    Also fact she did it with another race may corroborate this, that she used it for shock value against her family.

    She should confront her own family viz her issues and not involve others - she's a coward.

    And the coloured guy who got involved should realise he may be used as an animal - dehumansied. if he did it knowing this then difficult to for him to demand respect from others indicating he could be a self racist

    Is this all too deep and complicated for you ? Your ignorance is making me laugh
    I haven't said anything ignorant haha. But nice try. Your explanation wasn't even complicated. It was pretty stupid if you ask me.

    I love how you're making ASSUMPTIONS about this woman's life. The OP is a clear *******, yet you go off by what stupidity he has to say? That makes you even more ignorant.

    "that she used it for shock value against her family"
    Um, what? People don't date outside of their race just to shock or piss off their family. They do it because they love that person who just happens to be a different race.

    "And the coloured guy who got involved should realise he may be used as an animal - dehumansied"
    Utter stupidity again. I don't think you've ever been in love before, otherwise you wouldn't be saying this ****. No matter what a person has done or gone through in their life, if another person falls in love with them, they're willing to push that all aside and start a new life with them. That is what this guy has clearly done, and I salute him for that because he sounds like a lovely guy to take on a divorcee with a child (whether or not that is completely true) It takes someone with a lot of love and compassion to be able to do that.

    "She should confront her own family viz her issues and not involve others - she's a coward."
    Do you know this woman personally? If not, what the hell are you talking about? You don't know what she's been through and what she's done in order to move on and get help. Sometimes people CAN'T turn to their family, so they have no choice but to turn to others. As long as she has someone now in her life who is going to help her, so what if she never went to her family first?

    Wow. I really can't believe someone can be THAT stupid.
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    Just read through the whole thread. Sounds like OP just wants people to support his disapproval of this relationship.



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    This is the ultimate TSR relationship thread, you could put it in a frame and hang it by the door of the forum.

    It has marriage, divorce, secret affairs, interracial dating, an age gap, a child, casual racism and assorted bigotry, sheltered social attitudes, moral outrage and at least one poster who you just can't quite believe is real.

    Brilliant.

    As to the topic, it doesn't really matter.
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    Interracial marriages for the most part do not last and should be left alone, add that to the fact shes 19,single and has a kid i would stay right away from her.
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    (Original post by Novascope)
    "I'm not a bigot or a racist, you have misunderstood my concerns. The problem here is that there's interracial mixing. I'm completely against interracial mixing of any type. When I say mixing, I am of course referring to procreation and creating children. I'm not referring to different races coexisting together, that's not my point here."

    That is racist though... What's so wrong with people mixing? You can't say you're fine with different races coexisting, knowing the fact that as humans we cannot control who we love. So it's common sense to know that in life, people will mix. At the end of the day, as long as those parents are doing right by that child, and helping it grow into a good person why does it matter if that child is mixed? Please, start worrying over things that actually matter and are important in life.
    I'm specifically referring to the act of procreation, i.e. the creation of interracial offspring. It's not racist at all. I respect people from different races and nationalities, but that doesn't mean I approve of people from different races having children together.

    That's not the only issue here. The fact that she had an (interracial) child at the age of 17...it's very worrying. I do not want to judge her, but my suspicion is that this is not something to be proud of. Clearly, she has a very dark, tarnished past. Why does this guy want to get involved with someone like that when he has seen, first hand, exactly what this sort of relationship causes?

    Yes, I've been directly affected by yet another interracial relationship. This happened a few years ago. The guy went behind his father's back (who's still furious and massively disappointed), had a relationship with a woman of a different race, got married and had a child. Things really got out of hand there.

    And the other guy wants to follow in his (above) footsteps and repeat the same thing...that is the definition of insanity. This sort of relationship brings with it so many problems, it's not worth it at all.

    Besides, what sort of family dynamic is there going to be with a previously divorced single mother, her interracial child and a man of a different race? It's really messy.
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    (Original post by Zenomorph)
    1st off stop putting words into my mouth.

    She may have a problem with her father, with men, thus she wants ' revenge ', only problem is when you divorce someone , there are innocent victims - children.

    Also fact she did it with another race may corroborate this, that she used it for shock value against her family.

    She should confront her own family viz her issues and not involve others - she's a coward.

    And the coloured guy who got involved should realise he may be used as an animal - dehumansied. if he did it knowing this then difficult to for him to demand respect from others indicating he could be a self racist

    Is this all too deep and complicated for you ? Your ignorance is making me laugh
    Shock value? I take it you don't know a lot about interracial relationships or relationships in general?

    As for the other 'points' you've made, waste of time trying to make sense of it.

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