Should I be bothered that my friend is homophobic? Watch

ilem
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#21
Report 4 years ago
#21
Your friend sounds like a waste of time.
0
reply
gagafacea1
Badges: 12
Rep:
?
#22
Report 4 years ago
#22
(Original post by eggfriedrice)
To be honest, I have quite a few Christian friends and they're all lovely. The ones from England are very accepting and have no problems with homosexuality etc. But I have found the international ones have slightly more backwards thinking.



Thanks for the replies everyone. It's amazing seeing so many people being disgusted with the discrimination, I have some faith restored in TSR now (:
As some people have said, since I am already friends with her, and have known her for a year, it seems a shame if I suddenly shut her out of my life. I will continue being friends with her, but our friendship will definitely cool down.
The thing is most of these christian friends you have probably just say they're christians and that's it; they don't pray, they don't think about religion much. I'm not sure where you're from, or what you're religion is, but you need to know that most of the people that say they're christians, muslims or jews, don't actually follow the religion; it's just a label given to them by their parents and they just got used to it.
0
reply
SuperiorGenius
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#23
Report 4 years ago
#23
Typical religious people.
0
reply
andromedaveal
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#24
Report 4 years ago
#24
Firstly, I'm so sorry to hear your story. sadly, the church is, in parts, still a place where LGBT people are discriminated against. But please know that not all Christians think this is ok; things are slowly changing for the better. I think you should ask her why she thinks using homophobic language/being homophobic is acceptable, and share your unhappiness with her attitude with her. If she is your friend she will be seeking to love and respect you and your opinions, and acting in the way you described isn't doing that. Furthermore, maybe just let her know how toxic her attitude is even within her Christian culture - being LGBT in the Church is really tricky sometimes, thankfully we have a Lord who has said "come to me all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest" (Matthew 11:28). :-)
1
reply
eggfriedrice
Badges: 15
Rep:
?
#25
Report Thread starter 4 years ago
#25
(Original post by andromedaveal)
Firstly, I'm so sorry to hear your story. sadly, the church is, in parts, still a place where LGBT people are discriminated against. But please know that not all Christians think this is ok; things are slowly changing for the better. I think you should ask her why she thinks using homophobic language/being homophobic is acceptable, and share your unhappiness with her attitude with her. If she is your friend she will be seeking to love and respect you and your opinions, and acting in the way you described isn't doing that. Furthermore, maybe just let her know how toxic her attitude is even within her Christian culture - being LGBT in the Church is really tricky sometimes, thankfully we have a Lord who has said "come to me all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest" (Matthew 11:28). :-)
Thank you, that quote is amazing, I needed that (:
0
reply
Lulu24
Badges: 9
Rep:
?
#26
Report 4 years ago
#26
(Original post by eggfriedrice)
I've had this friend for about a year and she is quite a nice person, but a few days ago we came across the topic of homosexuality. Well rather she and her family were making a joke about someone being a lesbian but in a nasty way, and they well all laughing. So then I casually asked if her family were homophobic which she replied yes, and then I asked if she was too, and she said yes, without even hesitating.
Since then I have been slightly uneasy because I find discrimination against any group of people, whether by race, sexuality etc is disgusting. What's worse is that she's a Christian, and I thought Christianity was about loving one another but whatever (I just find it hypocritical).

Basically, I'm just feeling off with her. Am I overacting? I just think about the comments she made and her definitive answer of openly admitting she's homophobic, and it frankly still pisses me off.
I think everyone is entitled to their opinions and beliefs. It doesnt make her a "bigot" or whatever, it just means she doesnt agree with it because it's counter to her beliefs. Whatever. As long as she isnt being horrible to people then she is ALLOWED to believe what she wants. If you tried to impose any other beliefs onto her, then that makes you the oppressive and unaccepting one. If her having beliefs that dont agree with yours mean you dont want to be friends with her, then so be it.
0
reply
Lulu24
Badges: 9
Rep:
?
#27
Report 4 years ago
#27
(Original post by eggfriedrice)
Thank you, that quote is amazing, I needed that (:
Not tryna be funny. But there's also a place in the bible that says being gay is a sin. I just hate people quoting bible to suit their argument. It's clearly not allowed in the bible, so stop trying to make it look ok in the eyes of christianity when it's clearly NOT. I'm not even christian myself, but stop trying to make a common stone look like a diamond. If you get my drift.
0
reply
Green_Pink
Badges: 13
Rep:
?
#28
Report 4 years ago
#28
(Original post by SnoochToTheBooch)
Well what do you expect from a ****ing christian? Rational thought? Sensible opinions?
We're not all so bad Personally I can't stand the people who use the message of Jesus to condone homophobia when what he preached was pretty much the exact opposite.
0
reply
felamaslen
Badges: 15
Rep:
?
#29
Report 4 years ago
#29
(Original post by SnoochToTheBooch)
Well what do you expect from a ****ing christian? Rational thought? Sensible opinions?
All people can be irrational.
0
reply
YesAllMen
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#30
Report 4 years ago
#30
(Original post by Noble.)
Homophobic and Christian... I bet she's the life and soul of a party.
This doesn't even make any sense :|
0
reply
SophieSmall
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#31
Report 4 years ago
#31
(Original post by YesAllMen)
This doesn't even make any sense :|
It was sarcasm, implying that Christians are the opposite of fun...and obviously that homophobes are not fun.
0
reply
EmergencyBagels
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#32
Report 4 years ago
#32
urgh im sorry but either try and open her mind or get away from her
idk your situation but i would personally just openly say i cant associate which such a hateful ignorant person goodbye
0
reply
eggfriedrice
Badges: 15
Rep:
?
#33
Report Thread starter 4 years ago
#33
(Original post by Lulu24)
Not tryna be funny. But there's also a place in the bible that says being gay is a sin. I just hate people quoting bible to suit their argument. It's clearly not allowed in the bible, so stop trying to make it look ok in the eyes of christianity when it's clearly NOT. I'm not even christian myself, but stop trying to make a common stone look like a diamond. If you get my drift.
Have you even read the bible? Have you even studied it?
If not, please don't comment on it. Plus, how does "the bible saying it's a sin" relate to what the other guy quoted from the bible.
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#34
Report 4 years ago
#34
(Original post by Lulu24)
I think everyone is entitled to their opinions and beliefs. It doesnt make her a "bigot" or whatever, it just means she doesnt agree with it because it's counter to her beliefs.
bigot means an intolerant person - shes intolerant to gays so yea shes a bigot
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
reply
gagaslilmonsteruk
Badges: 16
Rep:
?
#35
Report 4 years ago
#35
(Original post by eggfriedrice)
I've had this friend for about a year and she is quite a nice person, but a few days ago we came across the topic of homosexuality. Well rather she and her family were making a joke about someone being a lesbian but in a nasty way, and they well all laughing. So then I casually asked if her family were homophobic which she replied yes, and then I asked if she was too, and she said yes, without even hesitating.
Since then I have been slightly uneasy because I find discrimination against any group of people, whether by race, sexuality etc is disgusting. What's worse is that she's a Christian, and I thought Christianity was about loving one another but whatever (I just find it hypocritical).

Basically, I'm just feeling off with her. Am I overacting? I just think about the comments she made and her definitive answer of openly admitting she's homophobic, and it frankly still pisses me off.
Two ways to approach this

THE EASY WAY: Friends come and go, and in a few years you'll realise that she wasn't going to add much value to your life anyway, so not really a friendship to grieve about if it goes south.

THE HARD WAY: I presume you're religious too right, or did you meet her at school/uni/ a youth club / a mutual friend? Use arguments from the bible against her; "love thy neighbour" and the verse about he who has not sinned throws the first stone - I.e. point out she's not perfect, and some people may not accept certain things about her. Play her at her own game and WIN.
0
reply
Lulu24
Badges: 9
Rep:
?
#36
Report 4 years ago
#36
(Original post by eggfriedrice)
Have you even read the bible? Have you even studied it?
If not, please don't comment on it. Plus, how does "the bible saying it's a sin" relate to what the other guy quoted from the bible.
because that guy is trying to make it look like the bible accepts homosexuality, it clearly doesnt. And yes i've read it lol.
0
reply
Lulu24
Badges: 9
Rep:
?
#37
Report 4 years ago
#37
(Original post by Anonymous)
bigot means an intolerant person - shes intolerant to gays so yea shes a bigot
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Not really. She just doesnt like homosexuality. As i said, intolerance would be being aggressive towards them or rude towards them, they're still people, but you dont have to accept something in fear of being a bigot. We're all entitled to our own opinions and shouldnt be subjugated for them.
0
reply
UniMastermindBOSS
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#38
Report 4 years ago
#38
Who cares?

Is she planning to go out and attack homosexuals for the sake of them being gay, or does she just dislike them? It's only a concern if it's the former.
0
reply
jon5579
Badges: 3
Rep:
?
#39
Report 4 years ago
#39
lol she should go live in the Midwest so she can vote Republican with the rest of the nutjobs
0
reply
Anonymous263
Badges: 10
Rep:
?
#40
Report 4 years ago
#40
(Original post by eggfriedrice)
I've had this friend for about a year and she is quite a nice person, but a few days ago we came across the topic of homosexuality. Well rather she and her family were making a joke about someone being a lesbian but in a nasty way, and they well all laughing. So then I casually asked if her family were homophobic which she replied yes, and then I asked if she was too, and she said yes, without even hesitating.
Since then I have been slightly uneasy because I find discrimination against any group of people, whether by race, sexuality etc is disgusting. What's worse is that she's a Christian, and I thought Christianity was about loving one another but whatever (I just find it hypocritical).

Basically, I'm just feeling off with her. Am I overacting? I just think about the comments she made and her definitive answer of openly admitting she's homophobic, and it frankly still pisses me off.
it really all depends on you. does it bother you that your friend is homophobic? if so do you want to remain friends with them? Can you work past it?
Everyone is different, we are brought up differently, maybe its her religion or family that is influencing her views. How old are you and your friend? chances are she will probably grow out of it.
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Have you registered to vote?

Yes! (139)
38.19%
No - but I will (20)
5.49%
No - I don't want to (26)
7.14%
No - I can't vote (<18, not in UK, etc) (179)
49.18%

Watched Threads

View All