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    (Original post by Clip)
    An outrageously ageist comment.
    What other business do 40+ men have with 21 year old girls except wanting sex?


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    (Original post by IceJJFish(II))
    What other business do 40+ men have with 21 year old girls except wanting sex?


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    The interesting conversation.
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    (Original post by DorianGrayism)
    The interesting conversation.
    "Hey honey how was uni?"
    "It was good, how was you 30th school reunion?"

    :laugh:


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    I just thought it was amusing when you said you were 'Young for your age'.
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    (Original post by IceJJFish(II))
    What other business do 40+ men have with 21 year old girls except wanting sex?


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    Firstly, is there anything perverse about sex between consenting adults?

    Secondly, the OP said that she "liked older men", to which you replied that she liked perverts. Hence, you're stating that older men are by extension - perverts. You're putting a pejorative label on a group. What's that if it's not ageism?
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    (Original post by Clip)
    Firstly, is there anything perverse about sex between consenting adults?

    Secondly, the OP said that she "liked older men", to which you replied that she liked perverts. Hence, you're stating that older men are by extension - perverts. You're putting a pejorative label on a group. What's that if it's not ageism?
    Although I agree that the wrong word was chosen here, I think reference was being made to the predatory nature of a certain type of older man rather than pervert per se.
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    (Original post by Clip)
    Firstly, is there anything perverse about sex between consenting adults?

    Secondly, the OP said that she "liked older men", to which you replied that she liked perverts. Hence, you're stating that older men are by extension - perverts. You're putting a pejorative label on a group. What's that if it's not ageism?
    I would argue there is yes.

    You've tried to twist my words. When did I say that ALL older men are pervs? I said that those who look for relationships with those young enough to be their daughter are weird and I would argue perverts. Also have to be pretty sad not to have kids/a wife if you're in mid-40's (not including extenuating circumstances), it's not normal.


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    Would you go out with an older if he suffered from EDs?
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Uw0tm8_)
    Now i aint saying she a gold digga but she aint falling for no broke *****
    Thank you for your helpful post. Isn't there an age restriction on TSR?

    (Original post by the_vorlon)
    As someone whose in relationship with an older man I'm going to throw in a different prospective. I'm 21 and my OH is significantly older than me, we've been together for a year and a half and are extremely happy together. I can honestly say that I've never felt either of our ages has caused us any issues.

    I think it's very short sighted to say that a relationship with an older man is "in no way feasible." Just because someone is older (30-40's) doesn't mean that all they want to do is be at home watching the 10 o'clock news in their tartan slippers before bed just like just because I'm 21 I don't waste my weekends away in shot bars. The only way a relationship is not feasible is if you are incompatible and you can easily be incompatible with someone your own age as well.

    As cliche as it is if you want a relationship you need to find someone who you are attracted to, you have similar goals and interests with. If that person happens to be older then so be it. I'm not saying go out looking an older man I'm just saying you don't have to rule it out but don't dismiss men your own age either!
    I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. When I said not feasible, I meant for me personally. I can hazard a guess you're quite mature for your age, but I'm not. I'm always thought to be muc younger
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    (Original post by Eveiebaby)
    Although I agree that the wrong word was chosen here, I think reference was being made to the predatory nature of a certain type of older man rather than pervert per se.
    And? The context of this is women that go looking for older men.
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    (Original post by Clip)
    And? The context of this is women that go looking for older men.
    My point was to clarify some of the issues to take into consideration when going about such unions.
    • #5
    #5

    Oh well. I am 20 and never had a boyfriend too. Why? Because all guys around my age who wanted something with me- I never returned to them and have always found them childish but those whom I like have never given a chance to get to know each other, thinking I was young.

    This has been the case since I was 16 and considering the fact that all my friends are over 26, I guess this is because I have always been too mature for my age. I have always liked men between 30-60 (I know) but it has nothing to do with "daddy issues".

    This is the way we are and we can't help it. I understand you sis- nothing wrong with it!
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    (Original post by deansimpala)
    I thought I was the only one!!! I'm 17, and men I end up crushing on are 25-late 30's and almost always they're someone in authority :O


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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm close to your age and I've also never had a relationship and I also find 'older' men attractive. I don't know why either. It's not that I'm not attracted to men my own age it's just that there's something I find more compelling about the older ones. For some reason, I always try to convince myself that this isn't the case and that I don't find older men attracted (by 'older' I mean men in their 30s maybe even early 40s).

    I hate to admit this but I think the whole 'daddy issues' deal is a real thing. I was always close to my dad as a kid but as I grew older we just grew further and further apart. He was not the strong father-figure I expected him to be and (as much as I love my dad) he let us down in so many ways. I don't want people to twist this into something weird or disgusting as I am IN NO WAY WHATSOEVER attracted to my father - yeck that was even awkward to write. But I do feel like I'm maybe trying to fill the void of not having a strong male figure in my life. I always think of older men as being more 'manly' or dominant or whatever.

    I'm not really sure what I'm trying to say here...the above was just a load of waffle which probably won't help you in the slightest but that's just how I feel...
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Anon or delete please.

    Basically, I'm 21. I've never had a proper relationship and for that reason I'm not entirely sure. But I feel that I've never been properly attracted to a guy my age. Up until quite recently I've just thought to myself I couldn't really be bothered with it all.

    But one thing I've felt since around 16 is that I've been attracted to older men. Like 30s-40s. I thought when I was younger it was just a silly teenage thing, a lot of teen girls are attracted to authority figures. So I've almost been waiting to grow out of, but I haven't. And it's becoming an issue now because I really would like to be in a relationship but I know a relationship with an older man is not in any way feasible...

    Firstly, I am young for my age. So the difference in maturity would be ridiculous. Secondly, I know my attraction is not logical. I have met older men in bars and have flirted and chatted with them, and while I find them attractive my mind is questioning why they find someone so much younger than them attractive.

    Has anybody else experienced this? I need advice!

    I think what I find attractive is that they seem to have this power to them, like they know exactly who they are and what they expect of the world. This sort of self assertiveness that younger guys don't have.
    You have all expressed attraction towards older men but have any of you actually hooked up with a guy very much older than yourselves?
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    (Original post by Le Nombre)
    How can you have similar goals when you're so far apart age wise? Career wise alone, my goals at 40 will be making the last couple of steps up the ladder, not getting through the first two like now. Home wise it's going to be things like sustaining a marriage and getting the kids into good schools, which though feasible at 21 would be very rare.

    You don't know someone's goal is going to be marriage and kids when they are older, that's a massive generalisation. For a start, for plenty of people kids aren't even on the agenda at all.

    Career wise I admit it's likely you will be at different stages i.e. my OH has a successful job where he has been working for 7 years whereas I've only just left uni and am at the start of my career. That doesn't mean a relationship is doomed to fail, as long as you support each other that's all that matters.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thank you for your helpful post. Isn't there an age restriction on TSR?



    I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. When I said not feasible, I meant for me personally. I can hazard a guess you're quite mature for your age, but I'm not. I'm always thought to be muc younger
    Don't apologise my post wasn't meant as harsh as it sounded , sorry
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    [QUOTE=IceJJFish(II);52048547]What other business do 40+ men have with 21 year old girls except wanting sex?


    aint nothing wrong with an older man wanting to get with a young female,doesn't just have to be about sex.
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    there is no reason why young ladies should not find a healthy & wealthy older chap appealing. why be driven around in a poorly modified Citroen Saxo when you could be pampered in a Jaguar XJ ?
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    (Original post by the_vorlon)
    You don't know someone's goal is going to be marriage and kids when they are older, that's a massive generalisation. For a start, for plenty of people kids aren't even on the agenda at all.

    Career wise I admit it's likely you will be at different stages i.e. my OH has a successful job where he has been working for 7 years whereas I've only just left uni and am at the start of my career. That doesn't mean a relationship is doomed to fail, as long as you support each other that's all that matters.
    Ok, but presumably then you're still ln the same goal you were at 20 odd, building a successful relationship, in which case you aren't very good at meeting goals.

    But you said having the same goals, which you've then admitted you don't. Your OH is looking to become something very senior whilst you're just starting out. Supporting other people in their goals is not the same as having the same goals. I supported my parents in their career goals when I was fifteen, didn't mean I was looking to achieve the same.
    • #6
    #6

    I'm sort of similar.

    I'm looking for younger guys now (homosexual), but in my past I've always ended up with guys quite a bit older than me. When I was 15 I entered into a two-year relationship with a twenty-four year-old, it was actually great! The oldest guy I've dated was 28.

    You want to know if it's weird, if it's perverse? Hell yeah it probably is. As far as I'm concerned there isn't anything too strange about pederasty, I suspect that it is natural in some sense (and don't you dare accuse me of a naturalistic fallacy). Maybe with a man and a woman it's more weird? Perhaps a better question is: do you really care?

    It at least isn't immoral to sleep with an older man.
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    I love older men! I like the kinda Michael Fassbender type but realistically my range goes from 20-30.
 
 
 
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