Extreme Marriage Age Gap ? Watch

IceJJFish(II)
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#21
Report 3 years ago
#21
(Original post by maarg13)
Surely someone who believes that relationships are based around 'looks', "saggy old man" rather than more intrinsic (and important) qualities is just as deluded as I am... It's just my opinion and I respect that others disagree and that you're entitled to your own view. Out of interest, what's unethical about such an age gap?
Didn't say solely based but anyone who says looks in a relationship aren't important are lying, it's an innate feature in humans and there's zero point denying it. It's not unethical per se, as you've said its consenting adults I suppose but the intentions behind it are never good; it's either a man looking for a trophy wife or going through a mid-life crisis, and/or a woman after a rich husband. But hey if people want to live a lie who am I to stand in the way of them?
0
quote
reply
maarg13
Badges: 8
Rep:
?
#22
Report 3 years ago
#22
(Original post by IceJJFish(II))
Didn't say solely based but anyone who says looks in a relationship aren't important are lying, it's an innate feature in humans and there's zero point denying it. It's not unethical per se, as you've said its consenting adults I suppose but the intentions behind it are never good; it's either a man looking for a trophy wife or going through a mid-life crisis, and/or a woman after a rich husband. But hey if people want to live a lie who am I to stand in the way of them?
Fair enough; I'm not going to pretend the there aren't relationships with larger age gaps out there based on trophy wives/ gold diggers, but those are only thought to to be the norm due to their glamorisation in the press. I'd like to think that there are plenty of relationships out there which mean more than that and are simply the same as any other in that they're based around love.
0
quote
reply
catsis
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#23
Report 3 years ago
#23
(Original post by Ambrosia_angel)
I have feelings for an older man. I used to have the same opinions as you before I met him. Please don't judge.
Didn't you find it creepy when he made a move?
0
quote
reply
IceJJFish(II)
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#24
Report 3 years ago
#24
(Original post by maarg13)
Fair enough; I'm not going to pretend the there aren't relationships with larger age gaps out there based on trophy wives/ gold diggers, but those are only thought to to be the norm due to their glamorisation in the press. I'd like to think that there are plenty of relationships out there which mean more than that and are simply the same as any other in that they're based around love.
It depends how much of an age gap you are thinking, at 30 years to hook up is weird. It stems down to either immaturity in the older person if they are pursuing more than sex, or most likely psychological issues in the younger person if they are too (apparently people have fetishes for old men :confused: ). Either way it boils down to a lack of compatibility between the two if they adhere to social norms, which they usually don't (and is why me, amongst many others, would deem them troubled).
0
quote
reply
LutherVan
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#25
Report 3 years ago
#25
(Original post by HigherMinion)
It makes you wonder what their motives are. For the elderly gentleman it would be loneliness and status of having an attractive woman by his side until death. Could also be his last chance to produce an heir (see: Peter Brimelow, had two children at 60~ with a woman age 21). The young female can make a quick buck. Perhaps a cynical view.

The elderly female needs a provider and someone willing to do her work. If she hasn't had children she won't have them unlike the elderly gent, so you can throw that out the window. She doesn't want the loneliness and she can be sure the younger man will be capable of taking care of her until death.

Could also be a self-esteem issue, in both scenarios. The elder establishing dominance in a relationship they'd be unable to if they were on equal footing, age-wise.

Eh, I dunno. Why do you think it happens?

As to whether I think it's right that it happens: you can't stop these people. They'll do what they like, and it may work for them. But I don't think it's a healthy environment to be raising children in.
And these any different from many normal-age gap relationships?

People don't have motives when getting married?
0
quote
reply
may348
Badges: 1
Rep:
?
#26
Report 3 years ago
#26
You know that episode of Family Guy where Brian starts dating some old lady and at first it's great because they're intellectually on the same level, but then he starts to realize how boring and tedious she is and cheats on her with some hot young thing at the bar?

That's pretty much how I feel about it.
0
quote
reply
Toda
Badges: 8
Rep:
?
#27
Report 3 years ago
#27
(Half your age) + 7... rule of thumb
0
quote
reply
HigherMinion
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#28
Report 3 years ago
#28
(Original post by LutherVan)
And these any different from many normal-age gap relationships?

People don't have motives when getting married?
Most married couples have the express intention of raising children and growing old together. The same cannot be often said for 30 year-gap relationships.
0
quote
reply
kithu1602
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#29
Report 3 years ago
#29
you have to think the guy is 30 and still the women hasn't been born yet! Gross
0
quote
reply
LutherVan
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#30
Report 3 years ago
#30
(Original post by HigherMinion)
Most married couples have the express intention of raising children and growing old together. The same cannot be often said for 30 year-gap relationships.
What evidence do you have of this?

You think if a 48 year old marries a 26 year old, they do not plan to raise kids together and grow old together?
0
quote
reply
HigherMinion
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#31
Report 3 years ago
#31
(Original post by LutherVan)
What evidence do you have of this?

You think if a 48 year old marries a 26 year old, they do not plan to raise kids together and grow old together?
Well let's be honest now, the majority are in it to win it, then file for divorce. Otherwise, a 22 year age gap is going to get in the way of one of their happiness at some point.
0
quote
reply
LutherVan
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#32
Report 3 years ago
#32
(Original post by HigherMinion)
Well let's be honest now, the majority are in it to win it, then file for divorce. Otherwise, a 22 year age gap is going to get in the way of one of their happiness at some point.
How did you come to this conclusion?

Is there any stats that says extreme age couples divorce more and/or faster than close-age couples?
0
quote
reply
HigherMinion
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#33
Report 3 years ago
#33
(Original post by LutherVan)
How did you come to this conclusion?

Is there any stats that says extreme age couples divorce more and/or faster than close-age couples?
Alright, let's extrapolate a little; it's financial. At college age, whatever children the couple have will be a debt bomb for the man, who's supposedly soon retiring. And 75 is considered the average lifespan in the West. So when he's 75 and on the death bed, she's 50~ and widowed. Good job, together forever.
0
quote
reply
LutherVan
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#34
Report 3 years ago
#34
(Original post by HigherMinion)
Alright, let's extrapolate a little; it's financial. At college age, whatever children the couple have will be a debt bomb for the man, who's supposedly soon retiring. And 75 is considered the average lifespan in the West. So when he's 75 and on the death bed, she's 50~ and widowed. Good job, together forever.
How is this evidence that extreme age gap relationships are not genuine and based on raising kids and growing old together?
0
quote
reply
maarg13
Badges: 8
Rep:
?
#35
Report 3 years ago
#35
(Original post by HigherMinion)
Alright, let's extrapolate a little; it's financial. At college age, whatever children the couple have will be a debt bomb for the man, who's supposedly soon retiring. And 75 is considered the average lifespan in the West. So when he's 75 and on the death bed, she's 50~ and widowed. Good job, together forever.
And yet they would have been together for 24 years at this point... A lot longer than many marriages these days regardless of an age gap. My grandparents have a twenty something age difference and they've been together for decades. A happy marriage depends upon the individual couples rather than whether they have an age gap of less than x years.


Posted from TSR Mobile
0
quote
reply
HigherMinion
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#36
Report 3 years ago
#36
(Original post by maarg13)
And yet they would have been together for 24 years at this point... A lot longer than many marriages these days regardless of an age gap. My grandparents have a twenty something age difference and they've been together for decades. A happy marriage depends upon the individual couples rather than whether they have an age gap of less than x years.


Posted from TSR Mobile
Like I said, divorce is running rampant in our hedonist society, but we shouldn't accept it or make it worse.
0
quote
reply
MrsSheldonCooper
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#37
Report 3 years ago
#37
My parents age gap is 23 so my mum was 22 when I was born and my dad was 45.Personally though my maximum age gap would be 10 because my parents are complete opposites in terms of attitude towards things. I don't want the same thing with me and my other half
0
quote
reply
maarg13
Badges: 8
Rep:
?
#38
Report 3 years ago
#38
(Original post by HigherMinion)
Like I said, divorce is running rampant in our hedonist society, but we shouldn't accept it or make it worse.
I agree: divorce is becoming exceedingly 'normal' in society, although my parents have divorced adn it was the best thing that could've happened for our family, though I appreciate not everyone is as fortunate in this sense and it can be a traumatic time. I don't see how couples with larger age gaps are likely to increase divorces though. Yes, they may not have as much in common but this could be said for any couple overtime... Besides you know what they say, opposites attract


Posted from TSR Mobile
0
quote
reply
username1234032
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#39
Report 3 years ago
#39
(Original post by catsis)
Didn't you find it creepy when he made a move?
How do you know it wasn't me that made a move?
We have a connection above anything. We are mainly friends and are there for each other. All the other stuff are just an added bonuses.
0
quote
reply
catsis
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#40
Report 3 years ago
#40
(Original post by Ambrosia_angel)
How do you know it wasn't me that made a move?
We have a connection above anything. We are mainly friends and are there for each other. All the other stuff are just an added bonuses.
Fair.
0
quote
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Were you ever put in isolation at school?

Yes (142)
27.41%
No (376)
72.59%

Watched Threads

View All