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Why don't I have a boyfriend? watch

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Well the last time I was approached was in a club like a week ago. A boy came up to me asked a random question, to which I responded rather formally. Later my friend warned me that he was trying to flirt with me and I should have flirted back, but it was a very subtle way of flirting you know. I just don't know how to flirt :/
    Indeed. It can be difficult. My male friend was saying he has no idea how to flirt either. For me it is very easy, I flirted my way into a date last week.

    There has to be some element of flirting back. If I'm talking to a girl I don't expect her to flirt back every time I flirt, but if she likes me I'd need to her flirt back some of the time, to almost tell me to make a move. Boys won't make a move without at least some sign.

    What did he say to you?

    In that case you need to learn how to flirt, because it seems essential in the early stages of a relationship. I guess, learn to flirt. There might be Youtube videos or websites about it?
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    (Original post by Eboracum)
    Indeed. It can be difficult. My male friend was saying he has no idea how to flirt either. For me it is very easy, I flirted my way into a date last week.

    There has to be some element of flirting back. If I'm talking to a girl I don't expect her to flirt back every time I flirt, but if she likes me I'd need to her flirt back some of the time, to almost tell me to make a move. Boys won't make a move without at least some sign.

    What did he say to you?

    In that case you need to learn how to flirt, because it seems essential in the early stages of a relationship. I guess, learn to flirt. There might be Youtube videos or websites about it?
    He asked if I'm from a country that I'm not actually from, I said no. It felt too random and I thought he likened me to someone else. (and sooo many people think I'm from that country!)

    Thank you, I should look at some tutorials on YouTube for flirting. I did read some tutorials before but maybe a video tutorial will be more helpful.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    He asked if I'm from a country that I'm not actually from, I said no. It felt too random and I thought he likened me to someone else. (and sooo many people think I'm from that country!)

    Thank you, I should look at some tutorials on YouTube for flirting. I did read some tutorials before but maybe a video tutorial will be more helpful.
    Hmm, hard to know what to say back to that. I was going to suggest a flirty line in response but I'm not sure with that one. As a man I get most of my tips on dating/flirting from the website AskMen, perhaps girls have something similar but I do not know?

    Once you start flirting back with guys, they'll ask you out. But if you don't ever flirt they'll think you just see them as a friend. Best of luck!
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    Being a tomboy is unattractive to most guys. If a male was posting a thread about why he "couldnt get a girlfriend", the first 20 replies would all (correctly) tell him to go to the gym and dress better. The same applies here.

    You dont have to become super-girly or anything, but looking after your appearance and having a basic feminine vibe is pretty important, especially since you say you arent naturally attractive/flirty. Most guys put quite a high weight on physical attractiveness when it comes to choosing partners - typically unattractive girls find it easy to get sex and causal relationships (men will sleep with anyone) but harder to convert this into serious relationships with guys they find high quality.
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    Please do not change anything about yourself just to get a relationship. You shouldn't have to change. You should find someone who likes YOU for the real you. If you don't like wearing girly clothes then don't. There are plenty of men out there who will date someone a bit on the tomboy side.

    You're only 21. I think you underestimate how young you actually are. Plenty of 21 year olds, and much older, have never experienced a relationship before. And that's okay! There is nothing wrong with you.

    Your inexperience isn't an issue. Most 21 year olds don't have a lot of experience with serious relationships either. When you find someone you really like, you'll know. You'll feel the click and the chemistry. You'll bond and bounce off each other. It may be the issue of you just haven't found a person you click well enough with yet.

    Like another poster said, you may have confidence issues either. You seem you have a lot going for you. You are young, intelligent and probably have a very bright future ahead of you. Use that. Be proud. It may sound cliche, but that person sometimes just enters into your life when you are ready, when you feel confident, complete, happy and fulfilled. Focus on yourself first and that person will come, do not doubt it.

    I know how it feels to be frustrated with being single and feeling like no one likes you. But you can't dwell on that. Learn to love yourself and your current life. Embrace being single and young. That's what I did. As soon as I felt completely content and happy with myself and my singledom, BAM, my boyfriend popped right into my life a few days after.
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    The other thing you have to take in to account is different men and women act and respond in different ways. eg: A female aged 21 will respond differently to a male aged 25. People in a large city like London and Manchester will act differently to someone in a small town or village. Im sure some of your female friends can help you with a few lessons on how to pick up on the body language and signals men send out when they are flirting. When you do this flirt back. Lads like a bit of flirting. Think of it as a %.... for eg: a bloke will flirt 60% of the way and you should then flirt the remaining 40%. Have boundries and respect thiers. Dont be too eager that you come across as being desperate and dont hold back too much coming across as not being interested. (sonewhere in the middle leaving them wanting a little more is about right) It will all happen in time im sure. Good things come to those who wait... right??? I hope it all works out for you. I really do. Now i have read all the comments and advice too.... maybe i will try my luck again. Being single sucks.
 
 
 
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