What on earth is my boyfriend doing in the bathroom on our dates? Watch

Petro_99
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#21
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#21
(Original post by Anonymous)
How did you find out what he was doing?
It got a lot more frequent, I did notice small packets around the flat but at the time I was kind of denying it until once he was in the bathroom for 5 hours after which I had to call an ambulance as there was no response.
He`d collapsed after an overdose as he`d decided to mix alcohol and drugs- never a good idea!

Main point though, it does get worse and you have to take care of yourself first. You are drug and problem free, why be involved with someone who takes drugs with the associated problems?
You deserve better
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Anonymous #1
#22
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#22
(Original post by Petro_99)
It got a lot more frequent, I did notice small packets around the flat but at the time I was kind of denying it until once he was in the bathroom for 5 hours after which I had to call an ambulance as there was no response.
He`d collapsed after an overdose as he`d decided to mix alcohol and drugs- never a good idea!

Main point though, it does get worse and you have to take care of yourself first. You are drug and problem free, why be involved with someone who takes drugs with the associated problems?
You deserve better
Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry you had to go through that! Did you immediately dump him after that?

I know I deserve better but he denies everything and makes me feel like I'm crazy, so sometimes I'm so unsure about whether or not to leave. One day he'll tell me he smokes 6 joints a day and then when I call him on it he'll change his tune and say he really only smokes 2. Even then, 2 is still bad. I just don't know what to believe anymore.
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frankieboy
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#23
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#23
(Original post by Petro_99)
He was using his ipad as a surface to spread out the cocaine to inhale
This is a very bad idea. It might scratch the screen.
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VotreAltesse
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#24
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#24
(Original post by Drusilla)
Quick fap or shagging someone in bathroom.

1) Taking a dump

2) Smoking a jay

3) Shagging someone

4) Texting/Calling someone

5) Checking the football scores

6) Rolling another jay

7) Sniffing a line of coke

8) Taking some smack

9) How on Earth are we supposed to know?
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GeorgeTownsend
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#25
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#25
Probably doing drugs or weed tbh. It seems unlikely that bringing up senstivie topics would trigger in him the need to masturbate...
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Conzy210
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#26
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#26
Lol, 35 minutes smoking a joint or doing a line...

If that's what he's doing you'd 100% be able to tell. You can snort a gram of coke in that time.
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Daenerys...
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#27
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#27
(Original post by KingTiger)
TBF your BF sounds dodgy as ****. Why are you actually with him?

And the 'nice-guy' makes a smooth play :rolleyes:
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Petro_99
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#28
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#28
(Original post by Anonymous)
Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry you had to go through that! Did you immediately dump him after that?

I know I deserve better but he denies everything and makes me feel like I'm crazy, so sometimes I'm so unsure about whether or not to leave. One day he'll tell me he smokes 6 joints a day and then when I call him on it he'll change his tune and say he really only smokes 2. Even then, 2 is still bad. I just don't know what to believe anymore.
I was stupid enough to think he would change, but that incident made me to turn to my friends/ tutor/ domestic violence team and after speaking about what had been happening I finally had the guts to leave :-)

Firstly you are not crazy, do not doubt yourself :-) Do you really want to be with someone who lies to you? There are so many normal nice men out there who would love to have you and treat you with the care that you deserve, so why bother messing up your head and sanity with someone who makes you feel so confused?

And the drugs gets worse, because you get used to a certain amount and then you need more to attain a high, and with that comes more financial issues, anger and confusion- you really don`t need that :-)

If you want to talk about it, feel free to PM me in confidence :-)
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Incubator
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#29
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#29
Cocaine to Inhale? Seems legit.
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KingTiger
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#30
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#30
(Original post by Daenerys...)
And the 'nice-guy' makes a smooth play :rolleyes:
Regardless of who said it, it's still a good point.
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Coo Juice
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#31
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#31
Cocaine perhaps, a confidence/resolve boost to help him deal with difficult situations - he will feel increased anxiety and stress in these situations due to the weed use.
Perhaps read up on the effects of these drugs. Notice any sweating, increased/lack of appetite, funny pupils or whites of eyes, really wide open eyes.

Some youth grow out of drug use and stop, some are shocked out of it by something. For some they will become like 'functioning alcoholics' and function in a limited way. And some will experience life-long decline, which relatively few of those will recover from. I wouldn't let this go once you're sure.
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Anonymous #1
#32
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#32
(Original post by Daniel Crockett)
Cocaine perhaps, a confidence/resolve boost to help him deal with difficult situations - he will feel increased anxiety and stress in these situations due to the weed use.
Perhaps read up on the effects of these drugs. Notice any sweating, increased/lack of appetite, funny pupils or whites of eyes, really wide open eyes.

Some youth grow out of drug use and stop, some are shocked out of it by something. For some they will become like 'functioning alcoholics' and function in a limited way. And some will experience life-long decline, which relatively few of those will recover from. I wouldn't let this go once you're sure.
My boyfriend is 29...
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Coo Juice
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#33
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#33
He just disappears. Is ANYTHING else weird? Cocaine is probably about the only illegal drug he could get away with using without looking completely wasted. It is very expensive.

Is it likely he is on doctor prescribed valium or diazepam? This is something you need to consider and try not to make him feel uncomfortable about if this is the case. Habitual cannabis users are open to mental illness such as depression, anxiety, panic attacks.

Stress induced vomiting and defecation are even possible, I would not be so sure that he would want to discuss?
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Tom78
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#34
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#34
Smoking rocks in the bathroom
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Dr Pesto
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#35
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#35
(Original post by 061194)
He could be having a tactical w*nk .Maybe hes google-ing tits on the toilet because the porn keeps buffering or the internet connection is bad.Be honest guys dont just piss and sh*t whilst on the toilet love
It doesn't take 35 minutes to have a ****, tactical or otherwise.

My first thought was that he's probably doing drugs, but it doesn't take 35 minutes to do a few lines of coke, or even to smoke a spliff. He might have some kind of problem you don't know about, that he's embarrassed to discuss with you.
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keladry
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#36
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#36
Tbh this early in the relationship if he is hiding things from you and you don't trust him the relationship is doomed to fail. I think you already know that, that's why you painted him in such a negative light.
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keladry
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#37
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#37
(Original post by Anonymous)
Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry you had to go through that! Did you immediately dump him after that?

I know I deserve better but he denies everything and makes me feel like I'm crazy, so sometimes I'm so unsure about whether or not to leave. One day he'll tell me he smokes 6 joints a day and then when I call him on it he'll change his tune and say he really only smokes 2. Even then, 2 is still bad. I just don't know what to believe anymore.
If he is purposefully trying to make you doubt yourself and feel crazy then that is called gas lighting and is a form of emotional/psychological abuse. It can really mess people up, don't let it go further if you can see the red flags.
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Puddles the Monkey
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#38
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#38
(Original post by Anonymous)
tl;dr: Boyfriend disappears into bathroom on dates, won't tell me what he is doing in there. Super weird & shifty facial expressions when he emerges. Am I being paranoid?

My boyfriend is a stoner, he currently smokes around 6 joints a day (probably more at the weekends) and has admitted to doing opium, LSD and cocaine in the past. He also uses MDMA semi-regularly. I'm not a drug user at all.

Recently, I've noticed that we'll be out on a date, and sometimes if we're talking and the conversation veers onto a sensitive or emotional subject, he will get a funny look on his face and run to the bathroom. He will then be in there for AGES. And I mean forever - WAY longer than it takes to pee/poop or whatever. Around 35 minutes usually.

When he emerges he always has a really guilty look on his face like he's done something terrible, but I have no idea what it is. I used to think he was perhaps pooping and had an IBS type problem but I know if this was the case he would tell me. Now when he does this, I go on WhatsApp and look at his online status and he doesn't even come online. For someone who is permanently on WhatsApp when he has his hands free and has admitted he frequently texts on the toilet, this is pretty unusual, which leads me to think he's doing something which uses his hands and wouldn't allow him to text simultaneously.

I've asked him why he takes so long in there and if everything is ok, but he doesn't give me any explanation. I'm super confused and don't want to keep haranguing him, but at the same time his behaviour is seriously weird and I'm getting concerned.
It seems to be a reaction to the emotional conversations you guys are having. From what you've written it really sounds like this is what is triggering his behaviour. Are these conversations always about the same or similar topic?
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beckaroo7
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#39
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#39
What do you even do in this time? Just sit on your own in a restaurant on your own that whole time? Thirty five minutes is a long time. Id go with your gut instinct with this
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Anonymous #3
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Confront him?
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