Family says I'm worthless and stupid because of my degree subject Watch

Anonymous #3
#21
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#21
(Original post by Anonymous)
Anon because I'm using a friend's account.
TL;DR my family belittles my achievements, marginalises me and tells me I'm worthless because of my degree subject.

Basically, up until A Level I was never particularly academically able, but I worked my ass off to get where I am today, got A*AA in English Lit, History and Politics. In my second year of A Level I started self-teaching A Level Maths, and got an A. I did this because I decided that once I graduated I wish to pursue a career in accountancy. I managed to get some good offers and am now studying for a joint honours BA in Economics and Politics at a redbrick university. My GCSEs were terrible b/c I got severely bullied at high school, and I managed to turn my life around at sixth form where I made new friends. I do lots of extracurriculars and have managed to secure a finance placement year with an engineering company which should (all being well) see me through to a graduate scheme where I'll study CIMA/ACCA, qualify, and live happily ever after (so to speak!).

But, and here is the big but, my family is always belittling my achievements. My family keep saying that I'm wasting my time at university and that I could go into accountancy without a degree. However, I went because from what I understand there is a glass ceiling for accountants without degrees at the top. My parents and family don't respect my opinions because they think I've become some kind of pseudo-intellectual snob and whenever I give my opinion or join in a discussion they cut me off and accuse me of acting like a superior 'snob'. Furthermore, they are constantly belittling my degree, saying EconPol is a 'worthless' 'mickey mouse' degree subject and the only degrees they have respect for are STEM degrees. My brother is doing Electronic Engineering and they treat him like he's a god, whereas with me they just call me 'the young political economist' and tell me that I'm just wasting my time partying for four years (even though next year I'll be working!).

My brother is so horrible: he thinks that because he's doing engineering he's the messiah, and keeps saying "I could do everything you could do but you can't do everything I can do hahahahaahaha", and he tells me that he might just go into finance to prove how worhtless my degree is compared to his. Apparently, I am just sitting in a library reading bull**** for three years and wasting 30k, whereas I always thought uni would be a good investment for my career path even though it doesn't require a degree.

My parents (non-graduates) tell everyone about how they are so proud of my brother (who hasn't secured a placement year and does no ECs), and how they have less respect for me because I'm just a time-wasting little girl when in fact I am very hard working but feel that all my hard work has been for nothing!

I should be feeling happy and optimistic given that it's highly likely that this placement will lead to a permanent job and I won't be another underemployed/unemployed graduate. I'm also heading for a first class degree and have wonderful, supportive friends at university. But I always dread going home because everytime it's just "stop being so lazy and help with the housework, you're just wasting your time indulging in a degree you don't need whilst your brothers doing something practical". They NEVER praise me for anything anymore, and actively exclude me from conversations. They have no respect for me at all, and I just feel like I don't want to see them in the holidays and instead stay with my boyfriend.

My family have never been supportive towards me. When I used to come home everyday in tears after being bullied and having hate pages created about me on social media they told me to 'suck it up' and ignore them because it's just 'teenage fun'.

Atm I feel really depressed because and upset because last night I had a meal with family and family friends and my parents keep saying how I'm an embarrassment to them because I'll 'never get a job', and the guests all agreed with them (despite the placement year!). What should I do about this?

Sorry for the long post.
Hi sorry to hear about this, i get that a lot of non grads especially older ones just think us young people waste time at uni unless were being doctors or lawyers etc.... if i was you i would cut my family off and i bet they would, soon come running when and if you have grandkids they can't see etc. Also can i ask if you are Asian ? i have a lot of pals who are expected to clean cook etc when there male siblings are treated like gods, its a bad culture to be a girl in sorry about your situation at the end of the day, do what you wanna do its your life !
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mrstudenttsr
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#22
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#22
Sort of feel OP is just looking for compliments. You know ​your degree is perfectly respected.
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s234590
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#23
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#23
Of course you need a degree to work at a good accountancy firm in the future, don't listen to your family. Just do you and what you want to do.
And how is economics less superior to engineering? If anything its the other way round in my opinion. lol.
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Anonymous #4
#24
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#24
(Original post by Anonymous)
...

**** them. Get that grad job and shove it up your brothers/family's arse.
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CRW1996
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#25
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#25
(Original post by Anonymous)
Anon because I'm using a friend's account.
TL;DR my family belittles my achievements, marginalises me and tells me I'm worthless because of my degree subject.

Basically, up until A Level I was never particularly academically able, but I worked my ass off to get where I am today, got A*AA in English Lit, History and Politics. In my second year of A Level I started self-teaching A Level Maths, and got an A. I did this because I decided that once I graduated I wish to pursue a career in accountancy. I managed to get some good offers and am now studying for a joint honours BA in Economics and Politics at a redbrick university. My GCSEs were terrible b/c I got severely bullied at high school, and I managed to turn my life around at sixth form where I made new friends. I do lots of extracurriculars and have managed to secure a finance placement year with an engineering company which should (all being well) see me through to a graduate scheme where I'll study CIMA/ACCA, qualify, and live happily ever after (so to speak!).

But, and here is the big but, my family is always belittling my achievements. My family keep saying that I'm wasting my time at university and that I could go into accountancy without a degree. However, I went because from what I understand there is a glass ceiling for accountants without degrees at the top. My parents and family don't respect my opinions because they think I've become some kind of pseudo-intellectual snob and whenever I give my opinion or join in a discussion they cut me off and accuse me of acting like a superior 'snob'. Furthermore, they are constantly belittling my degree, saying EconPol is a 'worthless' 'mickey mouse' degree subject and the only degrees they have respect for are STEM degrees. My brother is doing Electronic Engineering and they treat him like he's a god, whereas with me they just call me 'the young political economist' and tell me that I'm just wasting my time partying for four years (even though next year I'll be working!).

My brother is so horrible: he thinks that because he's doing engineering he's the messiah, and keeps saying "I could do everything you could do but you can't do everything I can do hahahahaahaha", and he tells me that he might just go into finance to prove how worhtless my degree is compared to his. Apparently, I am just sitting in a library reading bull**** for three years and wasting 30k, whereas I always thought uni would be a good investment for my career path even though it doesn't require a degree.

My parents (non-graduates) tell everyone about how they are so proud of my brother (who hasn't secured a placement year and does no ECs), and how they have less respect for me because I'm just a time-wasting little girl when in fact I am very hard working but feel that all my hard work has been for nothing!

I should be feeling happy and optimistic given that it's highly likely that this placement will lead to a permanent job and I won't be another underemployed/unemployed graduate. I'm also heading for a first class degree and have wonderful, supportive friends at university. But I always dread going home because everytime it's just "stop being so lazy and help with the housework, you're just wasting your time indulging in a degree you don't need whilst your brothers doing something practical". They NEVER praise me for anything anymore, and actively exclude me from conversations. They have no respect for me at all, and I just feel like I don't want to see them in the holidays and instead stay with my boyfriend.

My family have never been supportive towards me. When I used to come home everyday in tears after being bullied and having hate pages created about me on social media they told me to 'suck it up' and ignore them because it's just 'teenage fun'.

Atm I feel really depressed because and upset because last night I had a meal with family and family friends and my parents keep saying how I'm an embarrassment to them because I'll 'never get a job', and the guests all agreed with them (despite the placement year!). What should I do about this?

Sorry for the long post.
Prove them wrong in the future. Everyone gets underestimated in life at some point. How good will it feel when you do get a great job? Use the whole situation as motivation to do even better. If you believe you can do something and it makes you happy then do it. **** what other people think.
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onry
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#26
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#26
(Original post by s234590)
Of course you need a degree to work at a good accountancy firm in the future, don't listen to your family. Just do you and what you want to do.
And how is economics less superior to engineering? If anything its the other way round in my opinion. lol.
bro how is economics superior to engineering ?
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jambojim97
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#27
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#27
(Original post by onry)
bro how is economics superior to engineering ?
It isn't.
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ChickenMadness
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#28
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#28
tell them to piss off and cut them out of your life. You don't need that kind of negativity. Try to find some people you can rely on that will make you feel happy rather than depressed.

(Original post by CRW1996)
Prove them wrong in the future. Everyone gets underestimated in life at some point. How good will it feel when you do get a great job? Use the whole situation as motivation to do even better. If you believe you can do something and it makes you happy then do it. **** what other people think.
Tbh doesn't really work for everyone. Some people don't really care about any of that and just want a normal family that respects them.
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pagorai
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#29
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#29
(Original post by Anonymous)
Anon because I'm using a friend's account.
TL;DR my family belittles my achievements, marginalises me and tells me I'm worthless because of my degree subject.

Basically, up until A Level I was never particularly academically able, but I worked my ass off to get where I am today, got A*AA in English Lit, History and Politics. In my second year of A Level I started self-teaching A Level Maths, and got an A. I did this because I decided that once I graduated I wish to pursue a career in accountancy. I managed to get some good offers and am now studying for a joint honours BA in Economics and Politics at a redbrick university. My GCSEs were terrible b/c I got severely bullied at high school, and I managed to turn my life around at sixth form where I made new friends. I do lots of extracurriculars and have managed to secure a finance placement year with an engineering company which should (all being well) see me through to a graduate scheme where I'll study CIMA/ACCA, qualify, and live happily ever after (so to speak!).

But, and here is the big but, my family is always belittling my achievements. My family keep saying that I'm wasting my time at university and that I could go into accountancy without a degree. However, I went because from what I understand there is a glass ceiling for accountants without degrees at the top. My parents and family don't respect my opinions because they think I've become some kind of pseudo-intellectual snob and whenever I give my opinion or join in a discussion they cut me off and accuse me of acting like a superior 'snob'. Furthermore, they are constantly belittling my degree, saying EconPol is a 'worthless' 'mickey mouse' degree subject and the only degrees they have respect for are STEM degrees. My brother is doing Electronic Engineering and they treat him like he's a god, whereas with me they just call me 'the young political economist' and tell me that I'm just wasting my time partying for four years (even though next year I'll be working!).

My brother is so horrible: he thinks that because he's doing engineering he's the messiah, and keeps saying "I could do everything you could do but you can't do everything I can do hahahahaahaha", and he tells me that he might just go into finance to prove how worhtless my degree is compared to his. Apparently, I am just sitting in a library reading bull**** for three years and wasting 30k, whereas I always thought uni would be a good investment for my career path even though it doesn't require a degree.

My parents (non-graduates) tell everyone about how they are so proud of my brother (who hasn't secured a placement year and does no ECs), and how they have less respect for me because I'm just a time-wasting little girl when in fact I am very hard working but feel that all my hard work has been for nothing!

I should be feeling happy and optimistic given that it's highly likely that this placement will lead to a permanent job and I won't be another underemployed/unemployed graduate. I'm also heading for a first class degree and have wonderful, supportive friends at university. But I always dread going home because everytime it's just "stop being so lazy and help with the housework, you're just wasting your time indulging in a degree you don't need whilst your brothers doing something practical". They NEVER praise me for anything anymore, and actively exclude me from conversations. They have no respect for me at all, and I just feel like I don't want to see them in the holidays and instead stay with my boyfriend.

My family have never been supportive towards me. When I used to come home everyday in tears after being bullied and having hate pages created about me on social media they told me to 'suck it up' and ignore them because it's just 'teenage fun'.

Atm I feel really depressed because and upset because last night I had a meal with family and family friends and my parents keep saying how I'm an embarrassment to them because I'll 'never get a job', and the guests all agreed with them (despite the placement year!). What should I do about this?

Sorry for the long post.
I am sorry to know that. However, i think you have achieved so much and i look up to people like you. Just to overcome the nonsense of your family and bullies and to still get till here is great.
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TheonlyMrsHolmes
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Yes your chosen degree subject is so worthless and useless and you shall be unemployed for the rest of eternity! :dry:

You clearly know what you want! Don't listen to anyone and live your life.
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Smonnie
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#31
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Without denigrating your family, the hurtful and inconsiderate things that they are saying to you are unacceptable.

You have clearly worked very hard, and you are studying a very important and worthwhile subject. You have a lifeplan, and you will never be short of job offers or money in the future because of the decisions you have taken.

Tell them very clearly that the things they say about your life choices are unacceptable, and that you do not wish to hear any more about it from them, unless they have something positive to say.
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CRW1996
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(Original post by ChickenMadness)
tell them to piss off and cut them out of your life. You don't need that kind of negativity. Try to find some people you can rely on that will make you feel happy rather than depressed.



Tbh doesn't really work for everyone. Some people don't really care about any of that and just want a normal family that respects them.
Your solution won't lead to a 'normal family that respects them'. If she proves them wrong then she got a good chance of gaining the respect of her family.
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Manny_khalae
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#33
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It's so amazing that you were able to get past the negativity and do so
Well for yourself. Just think
When you're doing well that you'll prove them wrong.


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ChickenMadness
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#34
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(Original post by CRW1996)
Your solution won't lead to a 'normal family that respects them'. If she proves them wrong then she got a good chance of gaining the respect of her family.
that respect is worthless. It should have been there from the beginning. The family doesn't care about her feelings or opinions is the main nasty thing.

There is no solution that will lead to a normal family that respects them apart from starting your own. If the family don't give a **** it will never change.
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carrotstar
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You'll be laughing when you're earning 3x as much as their current household income!

I would strongly suggest doing what you said you feel like doing: don't go home during holidays.
Being around people with such a negative attitude towards you isn't going to help anyone, and unless they have a sudden change of heart, it will continue. Have you tried to sit down and talk to them about this? Even if it's just one of them?
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Anonymous #5
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im so sorry they treat u like this - try and avoid them as much as possible!
many older people think u don't need a degree and only need experience but its not like that now u need both (e.g the head flood officer for SEPA has a French degree and is 40+ years old, theses days she would need a geography degree)
also tell ur bro that gone r the days where companies in specialized fields will take u on just coz u have a degree
also my husband done an engineering degree and it was treated like nothing in his family, his sister is now doing a nutrition degree and all I hear about is how clever she is :/
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TheGuyReturns
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#37
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Trolls are supposed to be annoying not upsetting. -5/10.

Before I get carded, c'mon, just read it again... I know a troll when I see one.
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ParadiseFound
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#38
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Talk about upper middle class problems. You could be 1000x worse off for some on your age and have guaranteed yourself a tidy future if you graduate.
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drsahib101
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#39
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Seems like your family are "science snobs"
Your family are only disregarding your hard work because its not science related, looks likr theyre believeing the big myth of science subjects being rhe most challenging and if u cant do them your worthless.

There will always be people against you, even your own blood. The only way to get through this is bw strong with your decisions, and work harder than you already are. You will reach the top and theyll be gob smacked when you do. Your parents seemed old fashioned so persuading them will be hard. But im telling you, when you reach the top, am i can bet money you will. Theyll praise you far more than your brother.

The key is stay motivated and humble, and rely on yourself for support. Cos you have got yourself this far, and you have so much more to achieve. In my eyes theyll only realise and change their thoughts once its in front of them. Keep working hard for yourself and slowly but surely theyll realise.

As for your brother, ignore him. Siblings are ***** most of the time.
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there's too much love
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What would your none graduate parents know on the matter?
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