Raped, who can I talk to?

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http://rapecrisis.org.uk/supportformenboys.php

yeah if you read it, the links it shows, I've tried them.Mankind is 150 miles away. even if I got counseling, I would be doing a 300 mile round trip every week + the counseling fees. I work below minimum wage, there is no way I could afford it.Survivors, again is some distance but I couldn't get hold of them. Same with Mpower. The others arent relevant as they deal with different issues.

Original post by redleader1

Have you been to the police ? They can help you by refering you to some services. Btw was it guy/guy rape or girl/guy ?

http://www.rapecrisislondon.org/content/links-organisations

they were males too.

Reply 21

celloel

Original post by Anonymous

Please go to the Police and report them. They should be able to offer support and advice. S/he deserves to be prosecuted.

Reply 22

username2178331

Original post by Anonymous

I know this sucks, but is there anyway of just doing phone counselling? Even just calling the Samaritans, they won't say anything back but you might find it helpful to just talk at them.

Reply 23

Bupdeeboowah

Original post by ubisoft

He is just stating what the law is (and how outdated and in need to change it is). Women still can not be prosecuted for rape, only sexual assault.

We're supposed to be enraged on OP's behalf, not think of sensible things you know!

Reply 24

username2178331

https://www.victimsupport.org.uk/help-victims/ive-been-affected/rape-or-sexual-assault-info-men

"Our volunteers can visit you at home (if doing so will not put you at further risk) or somewhere else if you prefer. If you don't want to see anyone face-to-face, you can also talk to us on the phone, either at one of our local offices or at the national Supportline on 08 08 16 89 111"

Maybe give these guys a call?

Reply 25

ubisoft

Original post by Anonymous

they were males too.

Get to the cops asap.

Reply 26

Anonymous #1

Original post by amibee

Here is a list of help available, depending on which part of the country you are in.

http://rapecrisis.org.uk/centres.php

thank you but all the 8 centres it lists near me are "Women and girls only" :frown:

Why do they have to be like this? It doesnt matter what gender you are rape is rape, we need the same help regardless of our bodies.

Original post by amibee

From my quick google, I found 3 centres that catered for men and boys, all the rest Woman and girls- so youre looking at 90% female centric.

yeah the nearest centre is a hundred miles away :frown:

Original post by Bupdeeboowah

Sorry to butt in here with something irrelevant, but under UK law only men are capable of committing rape. Nevertheless, women can still be liable for sexual assault.

call it whatever you want, I was "assaulted" by men anyway so whats your point.

Original post by celloel

Please go to the Police and report them. They should be able to offer support and advice. S/he deserves to be prosecuted.

It happened in another country, I went to a hospital but they told me to go away and I dont think the police would be more helpful. The men knocked me unconscious so i dont remember much to tell anyone.

Original post by amibee

I know this sucks, but is there anyway of just doing phone counselling? Even just calling the Samaritans, they won't say anything back but you might find it helpful to just talk at them.

I have called samaritans several times and they're friendly but not actually helpful. They can tell me "it's not your fault" as much as they like I still feel responsible for it. I want a counselor who I can get to know and be comfortable with and see every week.

Reply 27

DebbyDowner

Original post by amibee

Actually ****ing shocked at the lack of help for men and the amount of "women and girls only" centres.

There should definitely be help for men but think about it... Statistically there needs to be safe women only centres. They do a job that needs to be done, that doesn't take away from the fact that there should equally be help and safe spaces available for men too.

Anyway to the OP, I'm really sorry for what's happened to you. Calling Samaritans might help and it's difficult but you should go to the police as the person who did this to you shouldn't get away with it. Good luck x

Reply 28

DebbyDowner

You could also try online counselling? Try the website '7 cups of tea' it's actually really helpful and you can talk to the same person regularly.

Reply 29

Anonymous #1

Original post by amibee

Thank you I just tried to fill out a form, but of the counties they say they cover, mine is not listed. Thank you for finding this though, I will see if they have anything close to me.

Reply 30

username2178331

Original post by Anonymous

Thank you I just tried to fill out a form, but of the counties they say they cover, mine is not listed. Thank you for finding this though, I will see if they have anything close to me.

Its okay, no problem.If you want to send me a direct message you can - If you need someone to talk to - just say hello.
Ive called the Samaritans before, I found them irritating but thought I would mention it just in case you were desperate to get some words out into the world.

Reply 31

pbw

Original post by Bupdeeboowah

Sorry to butt in here with something irrelevant, but under UK law only men are capable of committing rape. Nevertheless, women can still be liable for sexual assault.

OP says he was raped by men. so he is covered under the law right?

Reply 32

Bupdeeboowah

Original post by Anonymous

call it whatever you want, I was "assaulted" by men anyway so whats your point.

My first point is, that if you were "raped" by a woman it would not be rape - and that would be a travesty considering your frustration. My second point is, it is because society and the government's attitude towards sexual violence against men that you are unable to find a social service to counsel you.

It is was not, as one angered user on this thread claimed in a rather discourteous manner, a post to taunt or mock you (though I do now realise that the words "butt in" was used, despite not intending to make any puns. I am deeply regretful for causing any further pain, and will edit my comments if you request so).

Reply 33

Bupdeeboowah

Original post by pbw

OP says he was raped by men. so he is covered under the law right?

Yes, and the sexual assault charge also applies to male perpetrators.

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 34

username2178331

Original post by Bupdeeboowah

Genuinely thought you meant to say "butt" which is why you got the reply from me that you did.If you say it was a typo then I apologise.

Reply 35

jdafonz

Well since ur already talking to raped, i think u have ur answer

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 36

Bupdeeboowah

Original post by amibee

Genuinely thought you meant to say "butt" which is why you got the reply from me that you did.If you say it was a typo then I apologise.

I do troll threads, but there is a certain line one cannot cross. I accept your apology, and apologies for my mocking comments as well.

Reply 37

royal1990

I'd just like to say that firstly, this is a disgusting crime to commit- regardless of gender. Male or Female, punishment should be the same.

I am utterly ashamed and disgusted with our culture of 'oh statistically its women who get raped more than men' therefore lets just provide support in this area.

How about a more flexible approach? Why not train people to be able to deal with the aftermath of rape and rape victims no matter what gender? Uni-sex support (to inc. transgender and any other group)?

What is more appalling is the seemingly outdated U.K. law. Somebody posted on here about the fact that only a man can be convicted of rape- and a woman only sexual assault? Forgive me of any blip or mismatch of detail, but isn't this hugely prejudice?

I'd say it amounts to sexism on a national scale. But who are we?

Fact of the matter is OP is a victim of a horrific crime. No matter what country it was committed in. I will say this, OP, I would check the legal situation in the country where this crime took place and enquire as to your rights? Here in the UK (if what is been said is correct) than you may be in for a struggle in terms of fighting for your rights. In the country of the offence you may stand a better chance of retaliation.

I reckon, if you were to publicly out your situation you'd have loads of followers. Particularly in the UK. I mean, if it is indeed true, you could have a potential lawsuit on hand with the UK government. Presumably, the government hasn't been challenged, or this particular law/act hasn't been brought to attention.

I think the public would be outraged to find such gender inequality when it came to such prejudice for victims of crime like yourself. Rape is the same, regardless of gender, race or culture. It deeply saddens me that many laws do not consider males and only females.

I think a rally is in order on behalf of the male population. More support of male rape victims!!! Particularly in the United Kingdom where in the modern age, you'd expect more equality!

OP fight this all the way!! :smile:

Do not give up!

All the best :smile:

Always look forward and never give up been you because of what they took away!

:smile:

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 38

Anonymous #2

http://www.survivorsuk.org/

Reply 39

HanaGEM

Original post by Zzzyax

lol, who goes: oh ive been raped, the first thing ill do is post on TSR lol

I genuinely cant believe anyone would LOL at this, and the OP stated theyve been waiting to see a counsellor so this is clearly not the first thing he did.

To the OP, I'm so sorry you've experienced this, maybe try pandys, they have a males only forum which may have more ideas where to look for support if nothing else.