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I'm engaged! But I don't want to do anything?? watch

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    Nothing wrong with you, do as you think best for your future.

    Already been in your situation.
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    (Original post by welcometoib)
    is this to the one you broke up with? what changed?
    I did post about it
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    (Original post by Gears265)
    There is economic benefits for the female yes because when **** goes tits up, the money, house and assets will only be flowing one way
    You're entitled to your opinion, but this isn't the case for us as we both earn a lot, very similar wage each.

    I never loved the idea of marriage generally as I agree you don't need to prove anything and like I said I hate the materialistic side of it. However a part of me held onto the idea that if I met someone I truly wanted to spend my life with, I would want to make that promise and commitment. And I have met him. It's about what that means to me and it's nothing to do with anything else for me. Maybe you don't agree with that, but that's how I feel and I'm perfectly entitled to it.
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    (Original post by AvaAdore)
    I did post about it
    cant find it, mind pasting it/repeating it? its nice to see, from you a couple of months ago to now being fine and engaged good luck
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    (Original post by AvaAdore)
    You're entitled to your opinion, but this isn't the case for us as we both earn a lot, very similar wage each.

    I never loved the idea of marriage generally as I agree you don't need to prove anything and like I said I hate the materialistic side of it. However a part of me held onto the idea that if I met someone I truly wanted to spend my life with, I would want to make that promise and commitment. And I have met him. It's about what that means to me and it's nothing to do with anything else for me. Maybe you don't agree with that, but that's how I feel and I'm perfectly entitled to it.
    Yes you are entitled to it and by all means enjoy it, but my personal opinion is marriage is some pointless concept drawn up from religion and this idea of being blessed by God. Since religion has all been proved nonsense, the concept itself can be considered nonsense, but everyone to their own
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    (Original post by Gears265)
    Yes you are entitled to it and by all means enjoy it, but my personal opinion is marriage is some pointless concept drawn up from religion and this idea of being blessed by God. Since religion has all been proved nonsense, the concept itself can be considered nonsense, but everyone to their own
    But that's my whole point? I don't believe any of that stuff either. It's up there with the biggest legal commitments you can make in a romantic relationship and I'd say a fairly noble reason to do this that sort of outweighs the many reasons you may not agree with it is simply love, without consideration of show, gain or religion.
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    Congrats
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    (Original post by welcometoib)
    cant find it, mind pasting it/repeating it? its nice to see, from you a couple of months ago to now being fine and engaged good luck
    Id rather not, I hope you don't mind! Sorry
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    (Original post by Final Fantasy)
    Nothing wrong with you, do as you think best for your future.

    Already been in your situation.
    What do you mean my situation? Care to share?
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    (Original post by Muttley79)
    You don't have to look like a meringue or have a flash wedding. I made my own dress to suit my tastes and did not wear a veil.

    Make your own choices for the day and don't feel you have to spend a fortune to have a great and memorable day.
    It's just the pressure of expectation making me feel I'm unusual. In most of my life, people expect me to be a certain way, thus I feel I constantly surprise and therefore inevitably disappoint people

    Also some of my elder relatives are apparently less than impressed that I'm marrying a black man so there's that, ****ing yay
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    Congrats. Well you don't have to want to do anything, but get married of course
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    (Original post by phunky_fresh)
    Congrats. Well you don't have to want to do anything, but get married of course
    And I do I just get tired when I think about having to plan it and stuff
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    (Original post by AvaAdore)
    And I do I just get tired when I think about having to plan it and stuff
    Take your time. Wedding planning looks like hard work.
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    (Original post by AvaAdore)
    And I do I just get tired when I think about having to plan it and stuff
    First of all, congrats! Second of all, I know how you feel. I've been engaged for a good while now, and I haven't made a single plan. My family were all excited as well, but it's not their wedding, so they will just have to live with whatever my partner and I choose. I'm a constant disappointment to them anyway.

    I don't like wearing dresses, so I know I am not going to wear a dress. Don't like wearing rings, either, so I am not going to have a ring. I am actually quite tempted to just go for a registry office ceremony, with just a couple of people there as witnesses. Nice and quick and cheap, too. Can all be done for under £200. Then maybe have a meal after for the four of us.

    There are lots of options to do it your own way. Whatever you feel comfortable with. Whatever you and your fiance will enjoy. If you have the money, you could go to Vegas, or have a beach ceremony in another country. You could have a themed wedding. Dress up as pirates or what not (friends of mine actually did that). There shouldn't be any pressure. It's down to the two of you, and the rest will just have to deal with it.
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    (Original post by AvaAdore)
    What do you mean my situation? Care to share?
    You created this thread explaining your situation. Go back to the original post that you wrote and refer to the title which you also wrote.

    I would prefer not to share mine here.
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    (Original post by Final Fantasy)
    You created this thread explaining your situation. Go back to the original post that you wrote and refer to the title which you also wrote.

    I would prefer not to share mine here.
    Lol ok grumpy.
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    (Original post by AvaAdore)
    Hi guys

    Haven't been around a lot as work has been insane and also my partner proposed to me, I said yes, lots of happiness etc.

    But now it's calming down I feel like everyone wants to know my wedding plans and I haven't even begun to think about it. My career has taken off big time and I'm nearly at the end of my course, I've been busy. But Is it normal to not have any interest in it yet?

    All the fuss makes me feel uncomfortable too, although I look feminine I'm not very conventionally (I.e stereotypically) feminine - I have no desire for some dress that looks like a cake or everyone paying attention to me for the whole day. Do you think this could be the reason I'm not so eager or something wrong with me??
    perhaps just have a small wedding and dont worry about people thinking you need a big dress etc, id be the same
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    (Original post by Kittiara)
    First of all, congrats! Second of all, I know how you feel. I've been engaged for a good while now, and I haven't made a single plan. My family were all excited as well, but it's not their wedding, so they will just have to live with whatever my partner and I choose. I'm a constant disappointment to them anyway.

    I don't like wearing dresses, so I know I am not going to wear a dress. Don't like wearing rings, either, so I am not going to have a ring. I am actually quite tempted to just go for a registry office ceremony, with just a couple of people there as witnesses. Nice and quick and cheap, too. Can all be done for under £200. Then maybe have a meal after for the four of us.

    There are lots of options to do it your own way. Whatever you feel comfortable with. Whatever you and your fiance will enjoy. If you have the money, you could go to Vegas, or have a beach ceremony in another country. You could have a themed wedding. Dress up as pirates or what not (friends of mine actually did that). There shouldn't be any pressure. It's down to the two of you, and the rest will just have to deal with it.
    There is no way I'd have a theme! God no offence to your friends each to their own but I just find that really gaudy and tacky. No Vegas either. Money isn't an issue for us so I'm not against going somewhere. God I dunno
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    (Original post by Kittiara)
    First of all, congrats! Second of all, I know how you feel. I've been engaged for a good while now, and I haven't made a single plan. My family were all excited as well, but it's not their wedding, so they will just have to live with whatever my partner and I choose. I'm a constant disappointment to them anyway.

    I don't like wearing dresses, so I know I am not going to wear a dress. Don't like wearing rings, either, so I am not going to have a ring. I am actually quite tempted to just go for a registry office ceremony, with just a couple of people there as witnesses. Nice and quick and cheap, too. Can all be done for under £200. Then maybe have a meal after for the four of us.

    There are lots of options to do it your own way. Whatever you feel comfortable with. Whatever you and your fiance will enjoy. If you have the money, you could go to Vegas, or have a beach ceremony in another country. You could have a themed wedding. Dress up as pirates or what not (friends of mine actually did that). There shouldn't be any pressure. It's down to the two of you, and the rest will just have to deal with it.
    Are you going to do something else instead of the ring thing?
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    (Original post by AvaAdore)
    There is no way I'd have a theme! God no offence to your friends each to their own but I just find that really gaudy and tacky. No Vegas either. Money isn't an issue for us so I'm not against going somewhere. God I dunno
    No offense taken. I wouldn't go for a theme or Vegas, either. What I mean, though, is each to their own. It's every couple's decision. Not the decision of family/friends/whoever.
 
 
 
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