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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    But my anxiety has made me obsess over it and right now I honestly don't know what the normal response would be, I just want people to tell me what they would do in this situation
    What would my response be? I'd forgive them, but I'd sure as heck be weirded out if it was a relative. I've had close friends do that sort of thing and we're all pretty comfortable with each other so I'd just shove them back. There's no 'normal' response - it's entirely relative. There is nothing wrong with this upsetting you. I have anxiety, too, so I tend to stress, but trust me, there's nothing wrong with being uncomfortable and nothing wrong with being indifferent.
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    (Original post by saladays)
    Dude, if it's genuinely upsetting you, then you should be upset.
    But my anxiety has made me obsess over it and right now I honestly don't know what the normal response would be, I just want to know how other people would react
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    But my anxiety has made me obsess over it and right now I honestly don't know what the normal response would be, I just want to know how other people would react
    Sorry I didn't realise that had posted

    But if a relative did it would you till be able to forgive them?
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    This is an example of the type of person that asks for permission to breathe
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Sorry I didn't realise that had posted

    But if a relative did it would you till be able to forgive them?
    Forgive, yes, but I wouldn't necessarily feel comfortable around them.
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    (Original post by saladays)
    Forgive, yes, but I wouldn't necessarily feel comfortable around them.
    But I so badly just want to get past it the person who did it has literally never done anything like this before and I know for a fact they didn't mean for it to be weird I love them so much and it scares me that it might have ruined our relationship
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    But my anxiety has made me obsess over it and right now I honestly don't know what the normal response would be, I just want people to tell me what they would do in this situation
    My sister does this at times, and I absolutely hate it, it drives me mad. Saying that, though, I think she's on the A.S so I don't think she understands that it bothers me. I tell her to stop, and to never do it again. About not forgiving someone for doing that, though? It depends on who it is. Why don't you tell us exactly what's happened? (If you haven't already, I just skimmed through the thread)
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    But I so badly just want to get past it the person who did it has literally never done anything like this before and I know for a fact they didn't mean for it to be weird I love them so much and it scares me that it might have ruined our relationship
    I'm sorry, but I'm still not sure how you feel about it. Are you comfortable around them? You say you love them and they didn't mean anything by it. That sounds to me like you can forgive and forget and that they're apologetic. You're definitely over-thinking it. It doesn't sound like any relationship has been ruined, it just sounds like something done in bad taste and immediately regretted. If you're feeling stressed/anxious feel free to pm me
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    (Original post by pineneedles)
    My sister does this at times, and I absolutely hate it, it drives me mad. Saying that, though, I think she's on the A.S so I don't think she understands that it bothers me. I tell her to stop, and to never do it again. About not forgiving someone for doing that, though? It depends on who it is. Why don't you tell us exactly what's happened? (If you haven't already, I just skimmed through the thread)
    It was my dad and it was just like a jokey jab that he didn't think would hurt me has apologised so much and I know he wouldn't have done it in a million years if he thought it would even annoy me but i just don't know
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    (Original post by saladays)
    I'm sorry, but I'm still not sure how you feel about it. Are you comfortable around them? You say you love them and they didn't mean anything by it. That sounds to me like you can forgive and forget and that they're apologetic. You're definitely over-thinking it. It doesn't sound like any relationship has been ruined, it just sounds like something done in bad taste and immediately regretted. If you're feeling stressed/anxious feel free to pm me
    Thanks for your reply I just want to move past it and I think I can but I don't know if this would be a weird thibg to do or if most people wouldn't forgive and move past it ?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thanks for your reply I just want to move past it and I think I can but I don't know if this would be a weird thibg to do or if most people wouldn't forgive and move past it ?
    Honestly, it doesn't matter what anyone else would do because like I said, it's all totally relative to the person experiencing it. If you're okay forgiving and forgetting, forgive and forget - generally, that's the best option for most situations as holding onto the past just makes you more stressed and more unhappy. The only real time you'd have to actually worry was if it happened again, in which case you need to address it. For now, though, if I were you, I'd forget it.
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    (Original post by saladays)
    Honestly, it doesn't matter what anyone else would do because like I said, it's all totally relative to the person experiencing it. If you're okay forgiving and forgetting, forgive and forget - generally, that's the best option for most situations as holding onto the past just makes you more stressed and more unhappy. The only real time you'd have to actually worry was if it happened again, in which case you need to address it. For now, though, if I were you, I'd forget it.
    Ok thank you! You guys all really helped
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Ok thank you! You guys all really helped
    Glad to hear it, hope you feel better
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It was my dad and it was just like a jokey jab that he didn't think would hurt me has apologised so much and I know he wouldn't have done it in a million years if he thought it would even annoy me but i just don't know
    I see! Is the problem that it hurt physically, or that it made you feel uncomfortable, or both?
    You say you know he wouldn't have done it on purpose if he knew it would be painful, and he's apologised, so I would try not to feel too upset about that. My dad, when he gets tipsy he gets a bit silly and tries to dance with me in a silly way, he can be a bit rough then but he doesn't mean it. I think it's shock, perhaps? You think because they're your parents they would never hurt you, but they're just human and accidents happen, people forget their own strength.
    As for the latter, sometimes people do that within families, in a playful way. I don't like it when my sister does that, but I don't like being touched in general. I googled it to get a general opinion on the matter, and it seems that it isn't unusual behaviour. Of course, it doesn't mean that you don't have a right to demand someone doesn't touch you in that way. If he understands you didn't like it, and appreciates that, I don't think it's anything to worry about, much less be something which is going to spoil your relationship.
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    (Original post by pineneedles)
    I see! Is the problem that it hurt physically, or that it made you feel uncomfortable, or both?
    You say you know he wouldn't have done it on purpose if he knew it would be painful, and he's apologised, so I would try not to feel too upset about that. My dad, when he gets tipsy he gets a bit silly and tries to dance with me in a silly way, he can be a bit rough then but he doesn't mean it. I think it's shock, perhaps? You think because they're your parents they would never hurt you, but they're just human and accidents happen, people forget their own strength.
    As for the latter, sometimes people do that within families, in a playful way. I don't like it when my sister does that, but I don't like being touched in general. I googled it to get a general opinion on the matter, and it seems that it isn't unusual behaviour. Of course, it doesn't mean that you don't have a right to demand someone doesn't touch you in that way. If he understands you didn't like it, and appreciates that, I don't think it's anything to worry about, much less be something which is going to spoil your relationship.
    It wasn't physical pain or anything it just made me uncomfortable and like you said it shocked me as he had never done anything even remotely similar before, we're both adults and like I said, he is usually one of the most caring people in the world but what with my anxiety already being high and that whole Sam Pepper social experiment thing (as stupid as I know that sounds) I just wanted to know that it would be ok to forgive him and that I wouldn't be underreacting. I know I sound like a stupidly nervous wreck but my anxiety has honestly been so awful this past year with uni and everything and this just kept niggling at me, I'm sure I can get past it though thanks for your response!
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    (Original post by pineneedles)
    I see! Is the problem that it hurt physically, or that it made you feel uncomfortable, or both?
    You say you know he wouldn't have done it on purpose if he knew it would be painful, and he's apologised, so I would try not to feel too upset about that. My dad, when he gets tipsy he gets a bit silly and tries to dance with me in a silly way, he can be a bit rough then but he doesn't mean it. I think it's shock, perhaps? You think because they're your parents they would never hurt you, but they're just human and accidents happen, people forget their own strength.
    As for the latter, sometimes people do that within families, in a playful way. I don't like it when my sister does that, but I don't like being touched in general. I googled it to get a general opinion on the matter, and it seems that it isn't unusual behaviour. Of course, it doesn't mean that you don't have a right to demand someone doesn't touch you in that way. If he understands you didn't like it, and appreciates that, I don't think it's anything to worry about, much less be something which is going to spoil your relationship.
    Btw I would let your sister know that it annoys you when she does that so she doesn't do it
 
 
 
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