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Anyone else's parents never let them cook or do laundry? watch

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    (Original post by Zain-A)
    Sounds really weird.
    It's really weird ngl. Slightly crazy too.
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    You need to live in a pakistani household, my mum would make you do your own laundry and cleaning and cooking too!
    P.s. i mainly do my own laundry and siblings laundry -_- and general cleaning of the house - i sometimes cook - but mum prefers to cook..
    You need to get the chores done before your mum does it basically
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    (Original post by alterskye)
    I've tried to prove I can look after myself by cooking dinner when my mum was out and thought my grandma would cook for me... my mum found out and my bedtime got put back half an hour earlier for a few days (yes, I still have a bedtime; I'm not allowed to choose when to go to bed and get in trouble if I try to oppose it). It's not that I let my mum treat this way, but rather I don't want to be punished for going against her ridiculous rules.
    Sorry to say it but your mum is a grade A ***** and a *****y parent.

    Once you move out tor uni get a job and save as much money as possible so you never have to move back home. Living in a house like that you'll never gain life skills or a life at all.
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    (Original post by whorace)
    Tell them they shouldn't be trusted with important responsibilities because they can't be trusted to raise you properly.
    Haha brilliant, although their response to that would be worse than their reaction to me trying to be independent
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    (Original post by Dannyboy2015)
    My parents are the same. It is really weird because they always say I do nothing around the house but then when I offer to do things I get told no...

    If it was just that I wouldn't mind particularly, it is more the fact that if I don't do things myself they simply don't get done. For example if I put clothes in the washing basket they won't be washed for like 2 weeks?! So I just do it when they aren't at home and that way I manage to get everything done. Thankfully they take my younger sister out at least twice on a weekday evening and then again pretty much all day Saturday.
    Yeah, I'm told I'm incapable of looking after myself and that I don't do anything to help out but when I offer to help out, I'm told 'No, you'll get in the way,' or 'You don't know how to do it properly.' The logic behind it is questionable.

    When my friends' parents go out, they secretly throw parties. When my parents go out, I secretly do laundry and cook food. What a time to be alive.
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    (Original post by alterskye)
    So I'll be starting uni this September (hopefully) and it's come to my attention that the reason I don't know some basic life skills isn't because I don't want to learn and become independent, but because I'm simply not allowed to learn.

    Everyone my age will cook for themselves (or their entire family) occasionally. For years, I have wanted to learn how to cook because it's a basic life skill... but my mum never let me. I'm 18 now and desperate to learn to cook for myself so that I don't look like a complete noob when I go to uni, but every time I ask to do so, I get yelled at/ignored/brushed off. I am ashamed to say I cannot cook the most basic of meals. My mum cooks all my meals for me. She occasionally complains about having 'to do everything for me' but when I offer to cook for myself, she refuses.

    Same with laundry; I am not allowed to know how to operate the washing machine or be responsible for sorting my dirty clothes and putting them in the machine. All of my friends have been washing their owns clothes for years. I know the basics of using a washing machine (I'm not stupid), but it frustrates me that I'm an adult yet not allowed to use one.

    Anyone else got similar experiences with parents? I've been reading lots online to learn how to look after myself and I think I'll be ok once I get to uni. I really want to be independent; I'm not the sort to sit on my bum all day and make others run around after me. But my mum's refusal to let me be independent is preventing that from happening.
    It is good you are moving out for uni and there are mums who like to keep treating their kids as babies even though they are grown adults. My mum does this with my older brother wouldn't let him cook, clean or wash up she will gladly do it all for him.
    If i was you write in a notebook everything your mum does in the kitchen how she cooks certain meals, how she uses the washing machine and when you are at uni put it in practice or just do it yourself once you see her do it don't ask for permission and pray nothing goes wrong.
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    (Original post by SophieSmall)
    Sorry to say it but your mum is a grade A ***** and a *****y parent.

    Once you move out tor uni get a job and save as much money as possible so you never have to move back home. Living in a house like that you'll never gain life skills or a life at all.
    Yeah, I've planned to get a job at uni and save like crazy to make sure I don't have to live at home after I've graduated.

    Funnily enough, my mum's asked why all the universities I've applied for are so far away from home. I pretended it was a major coincidence. Really, it's so I can avoid visiting home as much as possible when I go to uni (I also like the universities too!).
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    (Original post by alterskye)
    Yeah, I've planned to get a job at uni and save like crazy to make sure I don't have to live at home after I've graduated.

    Funnily enough, my mum's asked why all the universities I've applied for are so far away from home. I pretended it was a major coincidence. Really, it's so I can avoid visiting home as much as possible when I go to uni (I also like the universities too!).
    Good luck, I'd have done the same.
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    (Original post by chikane)
    It is good you are moving out for uni and there are mums who like to keep treating their kids as babies even though they are grown adults. My mum does this with my older brother wouldn't let him cook, clean or wash up she will gladly do it all for him.
    If i was you write in a notebook everything your mum does in the kitchen how she cooks certain meals, how she uses the washing machine and when you are at uni put it in practice or just do it yourself once you see her do it don't ask for permission and pray nothing goes wrong.
    It took some effort to persuade my mum to even let me move out for uni (she assumed I would live at home). I applied for Birmingham and she was confused as to how I would realistically commute there every day (from near London). I said 'No mum, I'm moving out...'

    Right now, I'm recording loads of easy, healthy recipes. Hopefully, I'll be set for September.
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    (Original post by alterskye)
    Yay, someone in my situation! I know what you mean about trying to do all the washing up before parents return home so they don't find out. It's ridiculous when you think about it.
    (Original post by alterskye)
    Yeah, I've planned to get a job at uni and save like crazy to make sure I don't have to live at home after I've graduated.Funnily enough, my mum's asked why all the universities I've applied for are so far away from home. I pretended it was a major coincidence. Really, it's so I can avoid visiting home as much as possible when I go to uni (I also like the universities too!).
    My choices are also miles away, for the same reason, and I don't really ever want to come back I already have quite a bit saved up so I can be as independent as I can from them at uni
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    This is what I would do.

    I'd Youtube for cooking. They have 3mn videos for the most basic meals and the most basic ingredients.

    And for Laundry simple.
    All your clothes have a tag telling in what degree you should wash the clothes in question.

    1- Sort out the clothes by colours.
    2- Make sub categories where you sort out by degress. 60 & 90 in one basket, 30 & 40 in one basket.
    3- The washing machines usually have Cold wash, Hot wash, Sythetic clothes, Silk fabric and such...
    4- Put in the machine and experiment. You'll eventually ruin something but you'll learn.
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    (Original post by auroraborealice)
    My choices are also miles away, for the same reason, and I don't really ever want to come back I already have quite a bit saved up so I can be as independent as I can from them at uni
    I don't even care if I end up in some horrible accommodation at university - at least I'll be away from home and able to learn how to cook/look after myself without being yelled at
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    (Original post by jgjog3)
    This is what I would do.

    I'd Youtube for cooking. They have 3mn videos for the most basic meals and the most basic ingredients.

    And for Laundry simple.
    All your clothes have a tag telling in what degree you should wash the clothes in question.

    1- Sort out the clothes by colours.
    2- Make sub categories where you sort out by degress. 60 & 90 in one basket, 30 & 40 in one basket.
    3- The washing machines usually have Cold wash, Hot wash, Sythetic clothes, Silk fabric and such...
    4- Put in the machine and experiment. You'll eventually ruin something but you'll learn.
    Oh wow, thanks! Also thanks for not being condescending as I was expecting with these replies.

    I have some questions about washing clothes which are probably really stupid but anyway:

    What's the difference between washing powder, tablets, liquid and gel? Capsules, pods and liquitabs? Are any of them better or more expensive than others, and do they all do the same thing? Which ones go in the drawer and which ones go in with the clothes? Do you have to use fabric softener or is it a waste of money?

    Sorry for so many questions, I'm just a bit confused.
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    (Original post by alterskye)
    Oh wow, thanks! Also thanks for not being condescending as I was expecting with these replies.

    I have some questions about washing clothes which are probably really stupid but anyway:

    What's the difference between washing powder, tablets, liquid and gel? Capsules, pods and liquitabs? Are any of them better or more expensive than others, and do they all do the same thing? Which ones go in the drawer and which ones go in with the clothes? Do you have to use fabric softener or is it a waste of money?

    Sorry for so many questions, I'm just a bit confused.
    1- Washing powder, tablets, liquid and gels are the same thing. People have preferences because of brands, scents, allergies and just maybe they like one better because it washes better.
    > My mum always washes silk sheets with liquid wash.
    2- It's the same as most commercial products. The more expensive, the more refined. However some are pointlessly expensive because of 'brand names' etc.
    3- Tablets go with the clothes... I think, I did it once and it worked out fine. I read the instructions at the back. They draw them so even illiterate people can understand.
    4- Fabric softeners are AMAZING, especially if you pick a cheap brand for washing powder. They make the clothes feel soft and smell nice for a week. However washing powder on it's own would do as most brands have nice flowery scents. exception being morrissons M saver ones

    I'm not an expert but it's what I know, and basically the back of bottle instructions.
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    (Original post by alterskye)
    It took some effort to persuade my mum to even let me move out for uni (she assumed I would live at home). I applied for Birmingham and she was confused as to how I would realistically commute there every day (from near London). I said 'No mum, I'm moving out...'

    Right now, I'm recording loads of easy, healthy recipes. Hopefully, I'll be set for September.
    Yes i did wonder as your moving out why can't your mum help you with learning to clean and cook. Have you told her you need to learn as you will be moving out?
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    (Original post by alterskye)
    So I'll be starting uni this September (hopefully) and it's come to my attention that the reason I don't know some basic life skills isn't because I don't want to learn and become independent, but because I'm simply not allowed to learn.

    Everyone my age will cook for themselves (or their entire family) occasionally. For years, I have wanted to learn how to cook because it's a basic life skill... but my mum never let me. I'm 18 now and desperate to learn to cook for myself so that I don't look like a complete noob when I go to uni, but every time I ask to do so, I get yelled at/ignored/brushed off. I am ashamed to say I cannot cook the most basic of meals. My mum cooks all my meals for me. She occasionally complains about having 'to do everything for me' but when I offer to cook for myself, she refuses.

    Same with laundry; I am not allowed to know how to operate the washing machine or be responsible for sorting my dirty clothes and putting them in the machine. All of my friends have been washing their owns clothes for years. I know the basics of using a washing machine (I'm not stupid), but it frustrates me that I'm an adult yet not allowed to use one.

    Anyone else got similar experiences with parents? I've been reading lots online to learn how to look after myself and I think I'll be ok once I get to uni. I really want to be independent; I'm not the sort to sit on my bum all day and make others run around after me. But my mum's refusal to let me be independent is preventing that from happening.
    Google is your friend, amigo. Youtube simple recipes. I've been cooking pasta, lasagna and pies since I was 13
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    (Original post by chikane)
    Yes i did wonder as your moving out why can't your mum help you with learning to clean and cook. Have you told her you need to learn as you will be moving out?
    Yep, I've started asking more recently because I'll be going to uni this year, so I'm pretty desperate to learn. But she's becoming more and more irritated whenever I ask. She's made it clear that she will not let me learn, so I guess I'll just have to hang on until September.
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    (Original post by jgjog3)
    1- Washing powder, tablets, liquid and gels are the same thing. People have preferences because of brands, scents, allergies and just maybe they like one better because it washes better.
    > My mum always washes silk sheets with liquid wash.
    2- It's the same as most commercial products. The more expensive, the more refined. However some are pointlessly expensive because of 'brand names' etc.
    3- Tablets go with the clothes... I think, I did it once and it worked out fine. I read the instructions at the back. They draw them so even illiterate people can understand.
    4- Fabric softeners are AMAZING, especially if you pick a cheap brand for washing powder. They make the clothes feel soft and smell nice for a week. However washing powder on it's own would do as most brands have nice flowery scents. exception being morrissons M saver ones

    I'm not an expert but it's what I know, and basically the back of bottle instructions.
    Ah thank you. Doesn't sound too complicated. I think I'll be fine for Septembef then!
 
 
 
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