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    (Original post by BWV1007)
    I'm sorry but have you not gotten over your teen angst yet? What has your mother done anyway?
    Teen angst - really?

    (Original post by Moonstruck16)
    My mother gave me up to my father when I was a few days/weeks old, turned up again when I was four, disappeared again, then turned up a few years later and caused pure (unwanted) chaos.

    Whilst I'm sure she may 'love' me in some way, the probably looked after me for a grand total of 1% of my life so far and that was with my father involved. I'm an adult now and whilst I wish her no harm, I don't need her in my life. Well she's not part of my life anyway.
    Ah that sounds pretty rough and if I'm truly honest my mum did more harm being around than if she would have gone but like you, I don't really wish any harm on her, just feel like we would be better apart

    (Original post by 999tigger)
    then you are an adult and its easy to move away. i cnat see the problem. its less hassle though if you dont burn bridges.
    Thank you that's appreciated and I understand what you mean with the bridges and everything, hence the dilemma I'm in
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    Just do a quiet distancing. If you make a point of it no matter whats one on in the past, then you will find it creates more trouble. People can have selective memoreies even if they have been unpleasant, its denial. Go and live somewhere else etc, dont go home as much or ever. What you don wnat is making a switch click for herr that she wnats to fight it.
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    Some people are being really insensitive here? Teenage angst? And just because someone 'wiped your backside' doesn't give them a free pass to take advantage of you (if that's what happened OP). I'm in a similar position with my cousin actually and although it's obviously less of a big deal (because she's extended family) my feud with my cousin has shown me that anyone can let you down, even your own family. Yes there has been times where she's had my back in the past but it doesn't make what she did right, and the nature of what she did meant I had no choice but to cut ties with her. You can do the same to your mum regardless of what good she's done you
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Can I ask did you have any siblings to factor in this? I have a younger sibling, although we both feel the same way, but I'm not sure what effect this will have
    I didn't, I'm an only child. He has other children not with my mother but I have no relationship with them. Are you close with your sibling?
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    I think this is very serious and you should speak to a counsellor.
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    Just do a quiet distancing. If you make a point of it no matter whats one on in the past, then you will find it creates more trouble. People can have selective memoreies even if they have been unpleasant, its denial. Go and live somewhere else etc, dont go home as much or ever. What you don wnat is making a switch click for herr that she wnats to fight it.
    Fair point, and I definitely don't want to escalate anything

    (Original post by Kyle1198)
    Some people are being really insensitive here? Teenage angst? And just because someone 'wiped your backside' doesn't give them a free pass to take advantage of you (if that's what happened OP). I'm in a similar position with my cousin actually and although it's obviously less of a big deal (because she's extended family) my feud with my cousin has shown me that anyone can let you down, even your own family. Yes there has been times where she's had my back in the past but it doesn't make what she did right, and the nature of what she did meant I had no choice but to cut ties with her. You can do the same to your mum regardless of what good she's done you
    That's exactly how I feel, it's as if because she is my mum everyone thinks she is entitled to something no matter what's gone on, but some of the things I have witnessed with her are unexcusable - sorry to hear about everything with your cousin though

    (Original post by Alice__90)
    I didn't, I'm an only child. He has other children not with my mother but I have no relationship with them. Are you close with your sibling?
    Ah ok, yes I am close to them and they always say they don't want to see her, but I feel like if they said anything they would escalate the situation with the way they go about things, so as I am older I feel likeit is up to me, and we both feel the same way about her.

    (Original post by TheDefiniteArticle)
    I think this is very serious and you should speak to a counsellor.
    Tbh I don't like counsellors, I went to see one when I was younger for a different issue all together and they basically said there was nothing they wanted to do - things might hhave changed though, and it would be a different counsellor
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    (Original post by M14B)
    Not without more information as to what is going on
    :confused:
    Basically it's really long and complicated but I can't stand seeing her and remembering the times I have spent with her. And she has done stuff in the past to me and my family which I find unforgivable, but then I always feel like it would be me that turns into the bad one if I cease contact with her.
 
 
 
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