Turn on thread page Beta
    Offline

    16
    ReputationRep:
    I definitely wouldn't have kids until I was at least 30 tbh
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Ayaz789)
    I think 32 is too late lol :P I want em early lol
    yeah, same but, around 28 max. I'm slightly worried about the effects of the implant especially if I choose to continue with it for another 3 years
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I respect that, and thank you for sharing. I guess comparing it to my mother at 26-27 that's why I saw it as old. While disregarding how things and time has changed.
    Meh, my mum was 36 when I was born and 40 when I had my sister - it was considered old at the time, and she was older than most of my friend's mums, but it never really affected me in a negative way.

    I think a lot of people's expectations are shaped by their peers. Lots of my friends and colleagues have started having babies in the last couple of years at a similar age to me, so it's really not unusual at all for us - the joys of trying to balance a career with child-bearing!
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    yeah, same but, around 28 max. I'm slightly worried about the effects of the implant especially if I choose to continue with it for another 3 years
    Haha aw dw about it Talk to your partner about it maybe & talk through it i want em by 28 max too haha
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Helenia)
    Meh, my mum was 36 when I was born and 40 when I had my sister - it was considered old at the time, and she was older than most of my friend's mums, but it never really affected me in a negative way.

    I think a lot of people's expectations are shaped by their peers. Lots of my friends and colleagues have started having babies in the last couple of years at a similar age to me, so it's really not unusual at all for us - the joys of trying to balance a career with child-bearing!
    Yeah.. the 'joys' haha. But, i'm really comparing mine to my mother not really my peers. And just wary about some health issues that could be genetic and sprung up near the 40s region.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Ayaz789)
    Haha aw dw about it Talk to your partner about it maybe & talk through it i want em by 28 max too haha
    I'll give it 2 more years or so, when we're more mature and not thinking so much about uni.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'll give it 2 more years or so, when we're more mature and not thinking so much about uni.
    Haha yeah its upto you so take your time
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    I had mine between 30-38. Would've been between 30-35, but I lost one in the first trimester, and couldn't face trying again til I was 37. Make no assumptions.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by DrSocSciences)
    I had mine between 30-38. Would've been between 30-35, but I lost one in the first trimester, and couldn't face trying again til I was 37. Make no assumptions.
    Aw, thank you for sharing that, I guess the general point is, let life have its way and not to plan it too much. Glad I was able to see other views . Thank you
    • Welcome Squad
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    Welcome Squad
    My parents were 34 and 35 when I was born, and I'm an only child, so I don't really see 32 as being a problem.

    I had my first at 21 (husband was 28)
    second at 23 (husband was 30)
    third at 25 (husband was 32)
    fourth at 29 (husband was 36)
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by PinkMobilePhone)
    My parents were 34 and 35 when I was born, and I'm an only child, so I don't really see 32 as being a problem.

    I had my first at 21 (husband was 28)
    second at 23 (husband was 30)
    third at 25 (husband was 32)
    fourth at 29 (husband was 36)
    interesting,I just thought that because my partner is younger than me, he'll push the time back more. But nice to see the other version.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    So what kind of commitment is he offering, given that you're talking about kids, but he's expecting you to wait 12 years? It sounds to me like a very uneven deal.

    My sister spent her entire twenties with a guy who eventually disappeared over the horizon. By the time she'd recovered from that relationship, and found a new partner, it was too late for her to have her own children.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by DrSocSciences)
    So what kind of commitment is he offering, given that you're talking about kids, but he's expecting you to wait 12 years? It sounds to me like a very uneven deal.

    My sister spent her entire twenties with a guy who eventually disappeared over the horizon. By the time she'd recovered from that relationship, and found a new partner, it was too late for her to have her own children.
    I see where you're coming from, and from what I have seen in him, career and being certain and establishing one self is more of a priority and he is selfish when he comes to me, not in a clingy way. He just wants to enjoy each stage well... plus we did discuss that kids will only happen when our relationship is at its strongest.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    We did discuss that kids will only happen when our relationship is at its strongest.
    A protracted relationship doesn't necessarily equate to a strong relationship. What does "at its strongest" mean? You are both on different pages currently, and he sounds unlikely to compromise, - which means that you will have to. Have you really accepted that? I don't think you have, hence this thread.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by DrSocSciences)
    A protracted relationship doesn't necessarily equate to a strong relationship. What does "at its strongest" mean? You are both on different pages currently, and he sounds unlikely to compromise, - which means that you will have to. Have you really accepted that? I don't think you have, hence this thread.
    The "at its strongest" is a quote by several couples I know who have kids. They've said that babies do change and test one's love for one another through patience and lack of sleep. So , when the relationship gets to that optimum level , then having kids won't affect is as much as the foundation is strong. And this is the condition we are willing to go by.

    I don't think he's unlikely to compromise, just that it's not a priority therefore, seeing it in the far distant future makes sense from his side.

    And yes , we're on two different pages now, but doesn't mean it will be like that for a long time. So if anything, we both will have to compromise. Not just one person.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by DrSocSciences)
    A protracted relationship doesn't necessarily equate to a strong relationship. What does "at its strongest" mean? You are both on different pages currently, and he sounds unlikely to compromise, - which means that you will have to. Have you really accepted that? I don't think you have, hence this thread.
    In addition, as mentioned earlier, maturity does change one. And to be frank, we're still maturing and growing up. I just started this thread to see others opinion around such matter and comparing it to mine, in aid to help my understanding of this topic.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    I'd probably wait 2-3 years into my marriage before having a child

    I've not really thought of a specific age :lol:
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Ayaz789)
    25-26 for me as a guy
    That is soo old Ayaz!! Really??
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I was discussing about kids with my bf, and he said that he wants one when i'm 32.. we're nearly 2 years apart, i'm 20 he's 18(19 in may) . I personally think 32 is a bit old.. what age do you guys plan/think of having kids?

    I would like to have mine when everything is good.. if it's 32 so be it, but for now...it's a bit old
    I genuinely though that this was a thread about OP wondering if babies can actually talk
    Spoiler:
    Show
    my answer would be they can go gnrjaeihwefjihwrjin but not speak properly, but something comes out
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by thefatone)
    I genuinely though that this was a thread about OP wondering if babies can actually talk
    Spoiler:
    Show
    my answer would be they can go gnrjaeihwefjihwrjin but not speak properly, but something comes out
    haha, sorry to disappoint you
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: April 28, 2016

3,310

students online now

800,000+

Exam discussions

Find your exam discussion here

Poll
Should predicted grades be removed from the uni application process

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.