Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
    Offline

    5
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by hezzlington)
    Do you really need to ask that? You're asking me why I think fantasizing about being raped is insane?
    I think insane is probably the wrong word. A lot of women fantasize about rape (it is a fact) and is common, therefore hardly insane. Disconcerting, maybe, especially when people believe they would 'want to be raped'
    • #7
    #7

    I don't think OP is describing a regular "rape fantasy" that a lot of women have(i.e. being taken by a top-of-the-food-chain strong male who wants them so much he can't help himself sort of thing). I think what she's describing is more of a "misogyny/ degradation fetish"(i.e. women who get off on being beaten and abused, and often by ugly disgusting men because that's even more degrading)-Op is probably going to end up on tubmlr's rape porn blogs eventually...
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by joey11223)
    .....you understand what the word fantasy means right? It isn't uncommon from self reporting, but as I outlined, those who do report yes, likely mean they want to be dominated, not actually raped, a bit like the OP in all likelihood

    and although incredibly unlikely, OP could be a masochist to the extent she might gain some enjoyment, or even that without being hurt she cannot become aroused. Again it is highly unlikely she is to that degree, but it is ignorant of you to say categorically the OP would not, as you don't know her sexually. Just like I could say no one would want to have "sex" with the silver birch tree in my garden, but I'd be ignorant to do so since it is quite likely someone would, I just don't pay much thought to the antics of dendrophiles.
    Being dominated in a consensual sexual environment and being raped are entirely different things.

    You're calling me ignorant because I'm suggesting OP wouldn't enjoy being raped?
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    ''This study evaluated the rape fantasies of female undergraduates (N = 355) using a fantasy checklist that reflected the legal definition of rape and a sexual fantasy log that included systematic prompts and self-ratings. Results indicated that 62% of women have had a rape fantasy, which is somewhat higher than previous estimates.''

    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19085605
    • #8
    #8

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    This sounds really weird, and I guess it is.

    But I've got no idea why I feel this way, and I want some answers. Like girls and guys, who it happens to have their whole lives ruined, but I just feel as if it wouldn't affect me.

    When I was younger, I actually wanted to be raped, so I could get my virginity out of the way. I knew this wasn't normal, but I thought it would go away. Then I started reading non-consent stories, and I really enjoy them. I still feel really weird about it, but I can't help what I like :/ I like ones that are really twisted too, which actually scares me. Is this what they call a rape fantasy, or something else?

    I understand why rape porn is looked down on and banned? But if the people are acting, I don't see the problem, nor do I see the sick side to the stories (which people comment on, clearly doing it as deep stories, not something someone should actually like or get turned on by.)

    To me, it doesn't seem so horrific. Is everyone so nonchalant about it, until it happens to them? Or is this a weird way of thinking?

    This isn't meant to offend people who this has happened to, as it seems like a horrific experience. I really, really don't mean any offence. I'm just voicing my thoughts, and I'm really curious as to what other people think. I haven't written or talked about this before (probably because everyone will be disgusted, but my curiousity has gotten the better of me.)

    I just wrote this as a bit of a rant, and kind of want to know if anyone else is like this? (I'm not expecting anyone to be) As this is really rare, isn't it? And people are looked down on for liking stuff like this? Why? I actually really want to know what people think.
    If you want it then it's not rape. Rape means to be forced against your will.
    Offline

    18
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by hezzlington)
    Being dominated in a consensual sexual environment and being raped are entirely different things.

    You're calling me ignorant because I'm suggesting OP wouldn't enjoy being raped?
    As I said yes they are, but many don't seem to appreciate that fact, and along with that "rape fantasy" is given too broad of a definition.

    ....you did read all of my post right? As in below the top two lines?
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    This sounds really weird, and I guess it is.

    But I've got no idea why I feel this way, and I want some answers. Like girls and guys, who it happens to have their whole lives ruined, but I just feel as if it wouldn't affect me.

    When I was younger, I actually wanted to be raped, so I could get my virginity out of the way. I knew this wasn't normal, but I thought it would go away. Then I started reading non-consent stories, and I really enjoy them. I still feel really weird about it, but I can't help what I like :/ I like ones that are really twisted too, which actually scares me. Is this what they call a rape fantasy, or something else?

    I understand why rape porn is looked down on and banned? But if the people are acting, I don't see the problem, nor do I see the sick side to the stories (which people comment on, clearly doing it as deep stories, not something someone should actually like or get turned on by.)

    To me, it doesn't seem so horrific. Is everyone so nonchalant about it, until it happens to them? Or is this a weird way of thinking?

    This isn't meant to offend people who this has happened to, as it seems like a horrific experience. I really, really don't mean any offence. I'm just voicing my thoughts, and I'm really curious as to what other people think. I haven't written or talked about this before (probably because everyone will be disgusted, but my curiousity has gotten the better of me.)

    I just wrote this as a bit of a rant, and kind of want to know if anyone else is like this? (I'm not expecting anyone to be) As this is really rare, isn't it? And people are looked down on for liking stuff like this? Why? I actually really want to know what people think.

    That takes the power away from the rapist.
    Offline

    5
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by hezzlington)
    Being dominated in a consensual sexual environment and being raped are entirely different things.

    You're calling me ignorant because I'm suggesting OP wouldn't enjoy being raped?
    You are ignorant in thinking rape sexual fantasy and real rape experience are equally dangerous
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by BeccaHP)
    You are ignorant in thinking rape sexual fantasy and real rape experience are equally dangerous
    You are ignorant in assuming that I think that..
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by joey11223)
    As I said yes they are, but many don't seem to appreciate that fact, and along with that "rape fantasy" is given too broad of a definition.

    ....you did read all of my post right? As in below the top two lines?
    Yes I wasn't disagreeing with you, my point was more addressed to those that think a 'rape fantasy' is anything like real life rape. They're not comparable, so to call it a 'rape' fantasy is questionable.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    OP is probably like 13, fantasizing about men.. i can only hope that you never have to experience getting raped and maybe you grow up once
    Offline

    5
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by hezzlington)
    You are ignorant in assuming that I think that..
    Well you said rape fantasies were insane, presumably because you fail to distinguish between that and the seriousness of the real life situation ?
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by BeccaHP)
    Well you said rape fantasies were insane, presumably because you fail to distinguish between that and the seriousness of the real life situation ?
    Can you expand on what a rape fantasy entails?
    Offline

    18
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by hezzlington)
    Yes I wasn't disagreeing with you, my point was more addressed to those that think a 'rape fantasy' is anything like real life rape. They're not comparable, so to call it a 'rape' fantasy is questionable.
    Yeah I suppose, more a buzzword. Although the idea behind it would be women who state they have this fantasy will likely include the fact they want sex to be initiated against their will, which obviously is rape by definition.
    Offline

    18
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by HOLA255)
    That takes the power away from the rapist.
    An interesting point, I always wondered if that could be a defense mechanism if you were ever in the situation. Would hearing the likes of "oh yes" "oh that's so good" type talk put them off to the extent they'd break the attack. But that assumes the rapist wants the women to be fearful, some will, some might actually be aroused further if they can believe the women wants it.
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by joey11223)
    Yeah I suppose, more a buzzword. Although the idea behind it would be women who state they have this fantasy will likely include the fact they want sex to be initiated against their will, which obviously is rape by definition.
    'against their will' is an important part.

    Because it's a fantasy, the end result is that they want it to happen. Do they want the emotional and physical damage that often comes with rape too? Does that turn them on? It's cherry picking.
    Offline

    5
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by hezzlington)
    Can you expand on what a rape fantasy entails?
    I think rape fantasy involves all the components which make up a real life rape (non-consentual sex etc), but obviously as it is a product of your own imagination (or, if reading another's writing of it, you are at least imagining it in your head) you always actually do have control over what is happening.
    In real life, you have absolutely no control over the other person's actions and have no idea what is going to happen. You can't really stop it and, whereas a fantasy is centred around your own pleasure, in real life this isn't about pleasure at all. It is entirely different in its emotional and physical impact, all because of that loss of control over the other person (which you have in fantasy and even somewhat in role play).
    Offline

    8
    ReputationRep:
    Rape fantasy is more of imagining a Mr Grey type man being rough, but you enjoying it.

    When your body doesn't want sex and you don't want sex, it would not be fun and pleasurable. It would hurt and it most likely would be someone who you don't want to have sex with.
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by BeccaHP)
    I think rape fantasy involves all the components which make up a real life rape (non-consentual sex etc), but obviously as it is a product of your own imagination (or, if reading another's writing of it, you are at least imagining it in your head) you always actually do have control over what is happening.
    In real life, you have absolutely no control over the other person's actions and have no idea what is going to happen. You can't really stop it and, whereas a fantasy is centred around your own pleasure, in real life this isn't about pleasure at all. It is entirely different in its emotional and physical impact, all because of that loss of control over the other person (which you have in fantasy and even somewhat in role play).
    Brutal physical and emotional trauma. Scarred for life. Risk of STIs/unwanted pregnancy. Yeah, a real turn on. Like I said earlier, it's cherry picking components of 'domination' and/or sex with a stranger. It starts with the premise that, you actually want it to happen, deep down. In your fantasy, you have control over the subject; you can imagine it's a big strong, ripped sexy man who's all mysterious. In reality, it could be a former friend who you had no attraction to, or a man/group of men/women/group of women who hold a knife to your throat.
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by bethwalker85)
    Rape fantasy is more of imagining a Mr Grey type man being rough, but you enjoying it.

    When your body doesn't want sex and you don't want sex, it would not be fun and pleasurable. It would hurt and it most likely would be someone who you don't want to have sex with.
    Exactly this. I think the sort of people that are into 'rape fantasies' are the type of people to read erotic fan fiction.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: May 3, 2016
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Has a teacher ever helped you cheat?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Write a reply...
    Reply
    Hide
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.