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Have you done something bad/revenge to an ex? Do you regret it? Watch

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    (Original post by Rock Fan)
    No point in looking for revenge, it makes you as bad as them. The best form of revenge is completely ignoring them.
    I ignore but I just feel hurt. What hurts me more if how easily they have moved on. While I am here in pieces. It s*cks.

    (Original post by insert-username)
    Doing something stupid like that would make you just as bad as your so called evil ex.

    Move on with your life.
    I am trying but failing miserably.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hmm.. I know my character. I would definitely regret it later and probably hate myself. I tried to be a decent human being but she treated me like sh*t and really said some nasty stuff to me which I really felt.
    You could find solace in taking the moral high ground and not putting her through what she put you through. If she carries on treating people that way then it'll be her own undoing, but you treating her akin to how she treated you could weigh on your mind for longer than you'd think.

    Ah I see what you mean. 7 years? Wow that is quite a long time. Well you could still apologise, no harm in doing that really, you will make peace with yourself but also they will hopefully realise that you are truly sorry?
    You'd have thought so, but I'd only be apologising to lift the weight of guilt off of my own shoulders; it wouldn't be a true apology.
    Yes, I really am sorry for the things I said to her... but there's every chance that she's forgotten about it. Why make her relive it for the sake of lifting the burden I unintentionally placed on my own back? It's my load to bear, and I bear it alone. Not because I want to, but because I have to.

    She might thank me for it, or she might go the other way entirely (I don't care if she ends up hating me, haven't seen the ***** since we split up so her attitude towards me is neither here nor there)... and in theory, that would double my guilt. Not only for putting her through **** in the first place, but by flogging a dead horse nearly a decade later and potentially bringing up passed memories (that's not a grammatical error, in case someone brings me up on it).

    The **** I said to her, man... I wouldn't want to relive it, if I was her. It was a brutal character assassination, and that's just the start of it. I never wished any ill upon her, I never tried to freak her out with shock tactics or anything that you'd expect a bitter guy to say, and before anyone gets the wrong idea, I certainly never laid a finger on her. But I ****ed her up. And words cannot express how full of regret I am, and how ashamed of myself I am.

    And that's just one ex. The most severe, granted. But looking back, I can see that I treated people badly. It's strange, what retrospect will do to you. Can't change the past, no matter how much you wish you could. Like you said, you can't un-say things once they've been said. Best to leave them unsaid to begin with.

    I have to agree with you. I have many regrets.
    No sense in adding one more onto the pile eh? You seem like a decent guy, so I'd say let sleeping dogs lie.
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    (Original post by Drunk Punx)
    You could find solace in taking the moral high ground and not putting her through what she put you through. If she carries on treating people that way then it'll be her own undoing, but you treating her akin to how she treated you could weigh on your mind for longer than you'd think.

    You'd have thought so, but I'd only be apologising to lift the weight of guilt off of my own shoulders; it wouldn't be a true apology.
    Yes, I really am sorry for the things I said to her... but there's every chance that she's forgotten about it. Why make her relive it for the sake of lifting the burden I unintentionally placed on my own back? It's my load to bear, and I bear it alone. Not because I want to, but because I have to.

    She might thank me for it, or she might go the other way entirely (I don't care if she ends up hating me, haven't seen the ***** since we split up so her attitude towards me is neither here nor there)... and in theory, that would double my guilt. Not only for putting her through **** in the first place, but by flogging a dead horse nearly a decade later and potentially bringing up passed memories (that's not a grammatical error, in case someone brings me up on it).

    The **** I said to her, man... I wouldn't want to relive it, if I was her. It was a brutal character assassination, and that's just the start of it. I never wished any ill upon her, I never tried to freak her out with shock tactics or anything that you'd expect a bitter guy to say, and before anyone gets the wrong idea, I certainly never laid a finger on her. But I ****ed her up. And words cannot express how full of regret I am, and how ashamed of myself I am.

    And that's just one ex. The most severe, granted. But looking back, I can see that I treated people badly. It's strange, what retrospect will do to you. Can't change the past, no matter how much you wish you could. Like you said, you can't un-say things once they've been said. Best to leave them unsaid to begin with.

    No sense in adding one more onto the pile eh? You seem like a decent guy, so I'd say let sleeping dogs lie.
    I am trying to do that, and be the bigger man and just let it go. But it's really difficult to do. I have so much pain and hurt inside me that I feel like I will explode. But I know if I do try and say something, it will probably affect me more than her. Because that's how I am.

    Well, if you really felt about and you do regret it, it is a true apology, I mean, why else do people apologise years later? I guess you look back and you think wow that was wrong of me to say, and I think maybe just telling the person know isn't a bad thing, although you never know what their reaction would be. Although I do understand what you're saying when you say she might have forgotten it so why make her relive it? I never really thought of it like that before.

    Well she just called her a b*tch lol so I am guessing you still feel bitter or something towards her?

    Do you want to PM me what you said to her? I am quite curious to be honest.

    I keep changing my mind..I just cannot let it go. I feel hurt by what she did and said to me. I wanted her to feel the same pain. But something is stopping me from doing that because deep down, I still care about her. :/
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I am trying to do that, and be the bigger man and just let it go. But it's really difficult to do. I have so much pain and hurt inside me that I feel like I will explode. But I know if I do try and say something, it will probably affect me more than her. Because that's how I am.
    Find a more conducive way to releasing your emotions. I've always found spending half an hour with a punching bag using raw emotions as my energy to be fairly cathartic.

    Well, if you really felt about and you do regret it, it is a true apology, I mean, why else do people apologise years later? I guess you look back and you think wow that was wrong of me to say, and I think maybe just telling the person know isn't a bad thing, although you never know what their reaction would be. Although I do understand what you're saying when you say she might have forgotten it so why make her relive it? I never really thought of it like that before.
    Yeah I get what you mean. The reason I said it wouldn't be a true apology was because I'd be doing it primarily to absolve myself in my own eyes, not because I want to soothe her and admit that I was wrong.

    Well she just called her a b*tch lol so I am guessing you still feel bitter or something towards her?
    Nah, I'm merely being honest about her
    She was *****y.

    Do you want to PM me what you said to her? I am quite curious to be honest.
    Nope. I was tempted to do so last night, but I can't remember exactly what it was that I said and I don't want to bring even more shame upon myself by bringing up dead memories. I'm content enough with the weight of what I remember I said to her, I see no reason to add yet more weight to it by trying to remember what else I said.

    Like I said, it started off as a brutal character assassination. I didn't pull any punches.

    I keep changing my mind..I just cannot let it go. I feel hurt by what she did and said to me. I wanted her to feel the same pain. But something is stopping me from doing that because deep down, I still care about her. :/
    Care more about yourself and how you'll perceive your past sense in the future. A life with regret sucks.
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    (Original post by Drunk Punx)
    Find a more conducive way to releasing your emotions. I've always found spending half an hour with a punching bag using raw emotions as my energy to be fairly cathartic.

    Yeah I get what you mean. The reason I said it wouldn't be a true apology was because I'd be doing it primarily to absolve myself in my own eyes, not because I want to soothe her and admit that I was wrong.

    Nah, I'm merely being honest about her
    She was *****y.

    Nope. I was tempted to do so last night, but I can't remember exactly what it was that I said and I don't want to bring even more shame upon myself by bringing up dead memories. I'm content enough with the weight of what I remember I said to her, I see no reason to add yet more weight to it by trying to remember what else I said.

    Like I said, it started off as a brutal character assassination. I didn't pull any punches.

    Care more about yourself and how you'll perceive your past sense in the future. A life with regret sucks.
    A punching bag would be a good idea. I have many emotions which I need to get out.

    Hmm ok. I just feel hurt more than anything. And I know saying anything to her will not get rid of the pain and hurt I am feeling. So I don't know what I can do to be honest. I feel stuck.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    A punching bag would be a good idea. I have many emotions which I need to get out.

    Hmm ok. I just feel hurt more than anything. And I know saying anything to her will not get rid of the pain and hurt I am feeling. So I don't know what I can do to be honest. I feel stuck.
    As clichéd as the sentiment is, time really does heal all wounds.

    You'll start to feel better incrementally once you've found something else to direct your emotions at

    It doesn't even have to be a physical release of emotions, even burying yourself in music or a video game can help. I know that's tantamount to escapism, but if it works then why question it?

    People say that writing stuff down (akin to a journal) can help too. I tried to do that once, but my pen kept running out. I found my journal the other day, and the end result was quite hilarious as most of it consists of "****ing pen, stop running dry you *******". I got about 3 half-pages (and bare in mind these are A5 pages) before giving up :lol:

    Personally, this option isn't one I'd go for because I suck at talking to people and the conversations in my head never match how they turn out in reality, but what if you spoke to her? Just be totally honest with her about how she made you feel. No ulterior motive, not trying to get back at her, just plain old honest unloading. Doesn't even have to be in person, you could leave her a lengthy message on Facebook or something (which isn't a bad idea because then you have the time to think how exactly to word it instead of being put on the spot by actual conversation).
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    (Original post by Drunk Punx)
    As clichéd as the sentiment is, time really does heal all wounds.

    You'll start to feel better incrementally once you've found something else to direct your emotions at

    It doesn't even have to be a physical release of emotions, even burying yourself in music or a video game can help. I know that's tantamount to escapism, but if it works then why question it?

    People say that writing stuff down (akin to a journal) can help too. I tried to do that once, but my pen kept running out. I found my journal the other day, and the end result was quite hilarious as most of it consists of "****ing pen, stop running dry you *******". I got about 3 half-pages (and bare in mind these are A5 pages) before giving up :lol:

    Personally, this option isn't one I'd go for because I suck at talking to people and the conversations in my head never match how they turn out in reality, but what if you spoke to her? Just be totally honest with her about how she made you feel. No ulterior motive, not trying to get back at her, just plain old honest unloading. Doesn't even have to be in person, you could leave her a lengthy message on Facebook or something (which isn't a bad idea because then you have the time to think how exactly to word it instead of being put on the spot by actual conversation).
    I guess time will ease the pain (if I think logically) although right now it feels like hell.

    Yeah I've tried writing things down but that just doesn't do it for me.

    That's the thing, even once I say what I need to say, I know I feel still feel upset about it. And whatever I say will fall on deaf eyes.

    If I say something bad, I will feel guilty afterwards. I want her back in all honesty. But it's impossible and I am struggling with that.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Let's say the person hurt you and made you feel really bad and they were cruel to you, acted heartless, and tossed you aside, and you felt a combination of anger and hurt..

    Did you do anything to them? I don't mean physically harming them, but maybe exposing them, telling people their secrets, or just doing something that could have ruined their life or something..

    If so, what did you do and do you regret it?

    I am feeling this way and I might do something which I would regret later so just want to hear something to maybe talk me out of it or something..
    Tbh I have just recently seeked out revenge on someone who has really hurt me. They lied to my face after I told them I would rather hear the truth then be lied to but decided to lie anyway. I miss them. I really do. I acted the way I did because I was angry and hurt and I definitely felt used. (They went back to an ex). I probably shouldn't of acted the way I did tbh because it has made things worse. BUT at the same time. I was fed up of feeling used by everyone and never saying owt so unfortunately when this person lied to me, I decided to stand up for myself.

    I am tempted to get in touch to say why I acted the way I did but at the same time, they seem to be happy - getting a new job and getting back with their ex - I don't feel apart of their life anymore... It ****ing hurts the way I have been treated and it makes me angry that I feel even now I should just go and start an argument because of how hurt I feel but I know it won't help anyone.

    This is someone who I completely trusted with my life, the only one who knew so much about me, someone who I had so much in common with, with present hobbies and past e.g Sony Vegas movie software. We had a crazy connection and god knows how long it's going to take me to get over them.

    You will be the same. You will be in a constant fight whether you hurt them as much as they hurt you or whether or not you should get in touch with them or not. Hopefully you will have a better sort of perspective on it in time. The way I see it, if you are meant to be in each other's life, you will find a way back to each other.


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    (Original post by Jammie_x)
    Tbh I have just recently seeked out revenge on someone who has really hurt me. They lied to my face after I told them I would rather hear the truth then be lied to but decided to lie anyway. I miss them. I really do. I acted the way I did because I was angry and hurt and I definitely felt used. (They went back to an ex). I probably shouldn't of acted the way I did tbh because it has made things worse. BUT at the same time. I was fed up of feeling used by everyone and never saying owt so unfortunately when this person lied to me, I decided to stand up for myself.

    I am tempted to get in touch to say why I acted the way I did but at the same time, they seem to be happy - getting a new job and getting back with their ex - I don't feel apart of their life anymore... It ****ing hurts the way I have been treated and it makes me angry that I feel even now I should just go and start an argument because of how hurt I feel but I know it won't help anyone.

    This is someone who I completely trusted with my life, the only one who knew so much about me, someone who I had so much in common with, with present hobbies and past e.g Sony Vegas movie software. We had a crazy connection and god knows how long it's going to take me to get over them.

    You will be the same. You will be in a constant fight whether you hurt them as much as they hurt you or whether or not you should get in touch with them or not. Hopefully you will have a better sort of perspective on it in time. The way I see it, if you are meant to be in each other's life, you will find a way back to each other.


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    I miss the person too. Again, just like you, I feel angry and hurt. I know whatever I say won't make me feel any better.
    I could do things to ruin things for her, or say really mean things to her but that's just wrong and I would feel guilty and hate myself for doing it. I think I am more hurt and upset than angry.

    Just like you said, I am in a CONSTANT fight whether to hurt them just like they did to me, or just not get in touch and fight through the hurt and pain.

    I know her character very well, she will never come back in my again. That's what makes me really sad. She moved on so easily and she showed me how little she cared of me. It sucks.
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    I didn't listen to the advice and I went and done something pretty sad. I informed the girl's sister something which she would not want me to share. Now the girl hates me even more and I feel guilty and terrible. I regret it. And I can't take it back. I feel awful. I knew it was a bad idea but I went and did it anyway..

    What do I do?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I didn't listen to the advice and I went and done something pretty sad. I informed the girl's sister something which she would not want me to share. Now the girl hates me even more and I feel guilty and terrible. I regret it. And I can't take it back. I feel awful. I knew it was a bad idea but I went and did it anyway..

    What do I do?
    Make espresso and enjoy your evening.

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Let's say the person hurt you and made you feel really bad and they were cruel to you, acted heartless, and tossed you aside, and you felt a combination of anger and hurt..

    Did you do anything to them? I don't mean physically harming them, but maybe exposing them, telling people their secrets, or just doing something that could have ruined their life or something..

    If so, what did you do and do you regret it?

    I am feeling this way and I might do something which I would regret later so just want to hear something to maybe talk me out of it or something..
    I never had any secrets to expose thank god. Don't do it, it will only make things worse and it won't satisfy anything. It will make you look like a bad person and you might regret it when you're over the situation. There's no point.


    I broke into my exes locker...stretched the door out enough so I could take his pictures, idk how that could've helped anything at the time it doesn't make sense. I also kept calling him and hanging up 20 times in a row everytime, till one day he snapped and said he knew it was me on the other line. But never exposed or shared any secrets.

    That's the only ex I did anything to, lesson learned
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I didn't listen to the advice and I went and done something pretty sad. I informed the girl's sister something which she would not want me to share. Now the girl hates me even more and I feel guilty and terrible. I regret it. And I can't take it back. I feel awful. I knew it was a bad idea but I went and did it anyway..

    What do I do?
    So why do it, everyone told you not to do it, yet you did it anyway. Only thing you did was to make yourself look as bad as her, why stoop as low?
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    (Original post by Rock Fan)
    So why do it, everyone told you not to do it, yet you did it anyway. Only thing you did was to make yourself look as bad as her, why stoop as low?
    Because I wanted revenge I guess and I let my emotions get the better of me and I regret it ever since. I know I did, but everyone makes mistakes. Now I feel so much guilt inside and there is nothing I can do to make it right and it's a heavy load on my heart.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Because I wanted revenge I guess and I let my emotions get the better of me and I regret it ever since. I know I did, but everyone makes mistakes. Now I feel so much guilt inside and there is nothing I can do to make it right and it's a heavy load on my heart.
    Everyone told you the best form of revenge is ignoring them, I am sorry to say I got no sympathy after your actions.
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    (Original post by lolatmaths)
    lol no im haram asf
    No way. Halal on the streets but haram in the sheets.
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    (Original post by Rock Fan)
    Everyone told you the best form of revenge is ignoring them, I am sorry to say I got no sympathy after your actions.
    Yes, but everyone can make mistakes. So what do I do now?
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    (Original post by student.feed)
    No way. Halal on the streets but haram in the sheets.
    yh with your mum

    im not muslim
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    (Original post by lolatmaths)
    yh with your mum

    im not muslim

    yh with your dad
    Why are you saying haram for if you aren't even muslim.
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    (Original post by student.feed)
    yh with your dad
    Why are you saying haram for if you aren't even muslim.
    cos it was appropriate to use in the situation given
    dont get offended, its not that deep
 
 
 
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