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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Im worried she will take it further.


    And im not a homophobe.
    Sorry but your OP suggests otherwise. If you are not even accepting her sexuality then it is homophobic because you are offended that she is lesbian and you are scared that she will fancy you. Chances are, she doesn't fancy a homophobic, "supposed" friend like you. If she takes it further, just say no but most people wouldn't fancy their friends like that, friendships change if that occurs.
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    #1

    i dont care about gays but i had a right to know from the beginning

    stop twisting everything i say!!!!!!!
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    [QUOTE=sfaraj;64797503]i know lesbians in my all girls school, they dont crush on every single person you know, they have their own grilfriends and crazily they still have straight best friends who are supporting them

    you say she could've said earlier, well people dont really feel they are homosexual till later in their life, so its a bit selfish

    if youre not homophobic, then you should accept her as your best friend, she knows you're straight, doubt she would try to hit on you, and dating girls is not different to dating boys, she'll still give you advice...[/QUOTE

    But it might be biased?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So after being friends with her for 8 goddamn years(!!!!!) she decides to come out. Don't get me wrong, im not homophobic but i don't feel comfortable with my best friend being a lesbian. Im not starting to think she tried to hit on me at one point in life and i probably didnt even notice!!!

    I'm so lost and so disappointed she couldnt tell me earlier - did she not trust me enough or something?? I feel like i cant asking her for 'boy advice' anymore as she will tell me not to date them because she is into me secretly........ Ive tried to hint to her that im not ok anymore being such close friends. ive avoided her in school and she did notice but didnt make the link....

    Has anyone bean in such situation?
    There is no point in claiming you are not homophobic and then ranting and raving about how uncomfortable you are. Do not think that because she is a lesbian, she wants to get in your pants. She is your friend and it has taken her so much time to tell you and if this is how you have responded, you are not a very good friend. Feeling unsure, uncomfortable, or whatever is not the end of the world. She would probably be respectful of that and try and help you. However, she probably saw your potential to be the way you have been and so it stopped her from confronting you. She is not trying to change you. If she makes a move on you, then you can handle it but in a much more mature way. You can ask her for boy advice - girls ask me for advice on girls and boys and boys ask me for advice on boys and girls; your sexuality does not make an ounce of difference.

    Do you understand how difficult it is to come out? To be comfortable enough to tell those you think are going to stand by you and help you through the difficult times? Clearly not. To her, it probably looks like 8 years meant nothing. I suggest you have a good hard look in the mirror, shout grow up, and go and be the rock she needs you to be otherwise, leave her to move on and be happy.

    (sfaraj - Thank you )
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    i dont care about gays but i had a right to know from the beginning

    stop twisting everything i say!!!!!!!
    No you didn't have the right to know anything. It is her life and it should not make a shred of difference to your own.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    i dont care about gays but i had a right to know from the beginning

    stop twisting everything i say!!!!!!!
    you do not have a right to know. Her sexuality should have no consequence to you, it has no bearing on your life whatsoever. And as others have said have you any idea how long it takes to accept these things in your own head before you are ready to tell anyone? even your parents?
    Have i told my friends at school? no, because they don't need to know and i am scared of bigoted reactions such as yours
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    (Original post by ivybridge)
    There is no point in claiming you are not homophobic and then ranting and raving about how uncomfortable you are. Do not think that because she is a lesbian, she wants to get in your pants. She is your friend and it has taken her so much time to tell you and if this is how you have responded, you are not a very good friend. Feeling unsure, uncomfortable, or whatever is not the end of the world. She would probably be respectful of that and try and help you. However, she probably saw your potential to be the way you have been and so it stopped her from confronting you. She is not trying to change you. If she makes a move on you, then you can handle it but in a much more mature way. You can ask her for boy advice - girls ask me for advice on girls and boys and boys ask me for advice on boys and girls; your sexuality does not make an ounce of difference.

    Do you understand how difficult it is to come out? To be comfortable enough to tell those you think are going to stand by you and help you through the difficult times? Clearly not. To her, it probably looks like 8 years meant nothing. I suggest you have a good hard look in the mirror, shout grow up, and go and be the rock she needs you to be otherwise, leave her to move on and be happy.

    (sfaraj - Thank you )
    aha no problem

    that was beautiful, now i will go and find out whose cutting onions
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    I havent told her this. i dont want her to cry. but it is unfair. i wouldnt want to have a guy friend of mine telling me he likes me after such a long time.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    i dont care about gays but i had a right to know from the beginning

    stop twisting everything i say!!!!!!!

    maybe you would find it a bit annoying she didn't tell you earlier, then you might think to yourself.. "hm wait, I'm not a homophobic self indulgent 12 year old who thinks the world revolves around me" but maybe you are. Then maybe you'd realise that coming out is a hard time, and she wanted to take her time and wait for the right moment, and was probably scared as she was expecting reactions just like yours. You're meant to be her friend and help her through difficult times like this, not be an utter **** and make it worse for her.
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    [QUOTE=Anonymous;64797767]
    (Original post by sfaraj)
    i know lesbians in my all girls school, they dont crush on every single person you know, they have their own grilfriends and crazily they still have straight best friends who are supporting them

    you say she could've said earlier, well people dont really feel they are homosexual till later in their life, so its a bit selfish

    if youre not homophobic, then you should accept her as your best friend, she knows you're straight, doubt she would try to hit on you, and dating girls is not different to dating boys, she'll still give you advice...[/QUOTE

    But it might be biased?
    you dont know that, and it wouldn't be, its not like the conversation will be like:
    you:" this guy asked me out, but she flirted with X"
    her:" boys ain't loyal come date girls", idk what kind of advice may be biased but you need to justify it b, cos it wont be, there are relationship issues disregarding the sexuality of the couple, and they will still get advice, lesbians in my school give advice to straights and vica verca and tbh their relationships are going strong.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I havent told her this. i dont want her to cry. but it is unfair. i wouldnt want to have a guy friend of mine telling me he likes me after such a long time.
    She isn't telling you she likes you omg
    Stop assuming she fancies you just because she likes girls, yes that's right girls
    Girls doesn't necessarily = you
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I havent told her this. i dont want her to cry. but it is unfair. i wouldnt want to have a guy friend of mine telling me he likes me after such a long time.
    whose to say she will like you?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    She isn't telling you she likes you omg
    Stop assuming she fancies you just because she likes girls, yes that's right girls
    Girls doesn't necessarily = you
    but im the only person she talks to. who else is she going to like?
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    (Original post by sfaraj)
    whose to say she will like you?
    Im not saying she does but theres a good chance. shes obsessed with me. always commenting on my profile pictures and texting me 24/7!!!!
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    (Original post by sfaraj)
    whose to say she will like you?
    Oh no guys I forgot, i see where shes coming from now. I'm gay so that means I fancy everyone with a vagina
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    "I'm not a homophobe but I'm not comfortable with my best friend being a lesbian"

    Yes, you are a homophobe. Assuming she's hitting on you is like assuming you fancy every guy you meet. Grow up. Your friend deserved better.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    but im the only person she talks to. who else is she going to like?
    Any other girl in the whole world :lol:
    You can fancy people from a distance, christ i see girls in the street and think how beautiful they are without even knowing them
    funnily enough i would find it hard to crush on my close friends even though they are beautiful, the idea of kissing them after growing up with them is just odd so don't assume that she likes you
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Im not saying she does but theres a good chance. shes obsessed with me. always commenting on my profile pictures and texting me 24/7!!!!
    omd, swear thats what best friends do, have you never had a best friend?
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    (Original post by pumbting)
    Oh no guys I forgot, i see where shes coming from now. I'm gay so that means I fancy everyone with a vagina
    oh no! please dont talk to me pumntinggg(!)
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I havent told her this. i dont want her to cry. but it is unfair. i wouldnt want to have a guy friend of mine telling me he likes me after such a long time.
    I think you're right.

    You really need to stop being friends with her.

    She deserves far better friends than you.
 
 
 
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