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Should I risk an episode of craziness again, or should I sitck to depression? Watch

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    They wouldn't know. My partner is on my side and they wouldn't force me into anything. I'm just too embarrassed to talk to them I don't know what I want anymore. I want my life back but at the same time I don't care enough to motivate myself and book an appointment. It sounds terrible but usually i'd rather just continue with this parasite-like existence. At least I know what to expect. Sometimes I get sick of it though like this morning.
    Everything you've said here affirms my opinion... I stand by what I said. Your partner clearly doesn't understand what the long term implications are for you if you just sit and 'rot' as you've described it. With the appropriate treatment you could live the life you want to live.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    The private ones are so expensive though. I'd feel better if I paid though. At least then I'd have the 'right' to complain.
    ... dude just make an appointment!
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    (Original post by Little Popcorns)
    Everything you've said here affirms my opinion... I stand by what I said. Your partner clearly doesn't understand what the long term implications are for you if you just sit and 'rot' as you've described it. With the appropriate treatment you could live the life you want to live.
    They tried to help me but it didn't work. And I really doubt it. There's so many people on here already getting treatment yet they say that it makes little difference.
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    I myself have severe anxiety and I can completely understand not wanting to go to therapy (I personally feel in my case it would be rather useless to go and if anything make things worse)

    What I will say though is that you definitely need to go to a doctor. As Little Popcorns said, A doctor or your GP can't force you to see a psychiatrist so there's no need to worry about that.

    As an adult you will have available to you a wide range of different medically prescribed drugs, so just because you had an averse affect to one does not mean that the next one they prescribe will do the same thing.

    So to the the question of whether you should take the citalopram or not, I would say definitely not based on what you've told us.


    There will also be some form of walk in center (I think they're called emergency care centers now), where basically GP's are stationed 24/7, so If you go in and tell them about your situation, they'll be able to look you up on their data base and give you an emergency prescription hopefully.
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    (Original post by z33)
    ... dude just make an appointment!
    And say what exactly? 'Hey I know I've never mentioned anything about this and yeah it's been years but actually I went a bit mad, yeah, long time ago doctor, just never mentioned this, yeah I've been on benzos for many years too and no, I did not get them from you it's complicated'?There's no way I can say something like that.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    And say what exactly? 'Hey I know I've never mentioned anything about this and yeah it's been years but actually I went a bit mad, yeah, long time ago doctor, just never mentioned this, yeah I've been on benzos for many years too and no, I did not get them from you it's complicated'?There's no way I can say something like that.
    Yes
    write it down you dont have to say it
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    (Original post by Devinely)
    I myself have severe anxiety and I can completely understand not wanting to go to therapy (I personally feel in my case it would be rather useless to go and if anything make things worse)

    What I will say though is that you definitely need to go to a doctor. As Little Popcorns said, A doctor or your GP can't force you to see a psychiatrist so there's no need to worry about that.

    As an adult you will have available to you a wide range of different medically prescribed drugs, so just because you had an averse affect to one does not mean that the next one they prescribe will do the same thing.

    So to the the question of whether you should take the citalopram or not, I would say definitely not based on what you've told us.


    There will also be some form of walk in center (I think they're called emergency care centers now), where basically GP's are stationed 24/7, so If you go in and tell them about your situation, they'll be able to look you up on their data base and give you an emergency prescription hopefully.
    I've warned the online gp not to disclose any data to my gp practice so they won't have any info on that unfortunately (on depression/citalopram)... Psychiatrist was also private. Did you benefit from any antidepressants?
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    Honestly, you should stay off citalopram if that is what it does to you.

    Go back to your GP, get referred to a therapist. You might feel like your taking 10 steps back by going to the GP but it will help you in the long run. You clearly cannot help yourself at this point if your considering craziness is better than being stuck with your depression.

    You won't get better over night, however you will improve. You can take steps, start working out, eat a cleaner diet, go for walks, get a job. Just get out of your house, staying inside those walls forever only makes it worse.
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    (Original post by z33)
    Yes
    write it down you dont have to say it
    No way.. I honestly think I'd rather die than humiliate myself this way.
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    (Original post by z33)
    Yes
    write it down you dont have to say it
    I second this, write it all down on paper and hand it to the GP.
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    (Original post by TheonlyMrsHolmes)
    Honestly, you should stay off citalopram if that is what it does to you.

    Go back to your GP, get referred to a therapist. You might feel like your taking 10 steps back by going to the GP but it will help you in the long run. You clearly cannot help yourself at this point if your considering craziness is better than being stuck with your depression.

    You won't get better over night, however you will improve. You can take steps, start working out, eat a cleaner diet, go for walks, get a job. Just get out of your house, staying inside those walls forever only makes it worse.
    Stuff like healthy food and exercising don't work for me. Some people have suggested this in the past, but I don't even eat junk food and I've always been physically fit. Diet supplements didn't work either.
    And yeah you are probably right and it does make things worse but it just feels so safe, I can't bring myself to 'leave'.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Stuff like healthy food and exercising don't work for me. Some people have suggested this in the past, but I don't even eat junk food and I've always been physically fit. Diet supplements didn't work either.
    And yeah you are probably right and it does make things worse but it just feels so safe, I can't bring myself to 'leave'.
    I know how that feels, I once stayed in my bed for almost 2 days imitating a corpse. But you see, is this how you want to live the rest of your life? Don't say you'd rather die because you know that the unknown also terrifies you. What you need to do is get over the "humiliation" of going to the GP, the minute I went, I felt myself improving (even though all I was given was councillors numbers which I never called in the end, because like you, I never want to hurt my pride...but the comfort of knowing help is there helped me), someone in my life said something like "some times you have to fall before your pride" (I can't remember the exact quote) but she is right, sometimes you do, sometimes you have to completely humiliate yourself (it's not really humiliation in your case) to get the help you need.

    Also, you really have to make a change yourself, if you don't want to live your life like this then you have to find a way to change it. You need to get out of your house, you can't keep being comfortable. Why don't you just randomly take the train somewhere one day? walk around, observe happy people and happy families and make it a goal that one day you will be like them? You're only 20, you're young. You don't need to be hooked on anti depressants, you need to take your life into your own hands. Get a therapist, talk it out. Find things to do, leave your house, be healthy, get all the vitamins your brain needs to function properly. It's not all darkness y'know, you can completely turn your life around, you're not doomed in any way shape or form!
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    (Original post by TheonlyMrsHolmes)
    I know how that feels, I once stayed in my bed for almost 2 days imitating a corpse. But you see, is this how you want to live the rest of your life? Don't say you'd rather die because you know that the unknown also terrifies you. What you need to do is get over the "humiliation" of going to the GP, the minute I went, I felt myself improving (even though all I was given was councillors numbers which I never called in the end, because like you, I never want to hurt my pride...but the comfort of knowing help is there helped me), someone in my life said something like "some times you have to fall before your pride" (I can't remember the exact quote) but she is right, sometimes you do, sometimes you have to completely humiliate yourself (it's not really humiliation in your case) to get the help you need.

    Also, you really have to make a change yourself, if you don't want to live your life like this then you have to find a way to change it. You need to get out of your house, you can't keep being comfortable. Why don't you just randomly take the train somewhere one day? walk around, observe happy people and happy families and make it a goal that one day you will be like them? You're only 20, you're young. You don't need to be hooked on anti depressants, you need to take your life into your own hands. Get a therapist, talk it out. Find things to do, leave your house, be healthy, get all the vitamins your brain needs to function properly. It's not all darkness y'know, you can completely turn your life around, you're not doomed in any way shape or form!
    I hate calling people I don't know too.... See, even that would be a challenge. Honestly how could I ever get better.. They will expect me to challenge myself, go out of my comfort zone, maybe it's just not worth all the stress. Sorry for all the negativity but I'm sick of everything I hate how my life has turned out. I got myself into massive debts and now all my diplomas are useless.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I hate calling people I don't know too.... See, even that would be a challenge. Honestly how could I ever get better.. They will expect me to challenge myself, go out of my comfort zone, maybe it's just not worth all the stress. Sorry for all the negativity but I'm sick of everything I hate how my life has turned out. I got myself into massive debts and now all my diplomas are useless.
    You can PM me of you want, I can talk to you in more detail there.
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    (Original post by TheonlyMrsHolmes)
    You can PM me of you want, I can talk to you in more detail there.
    I'm too embarrassed :< I've been on TSR for a long while so it's just awkward. But thank you!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm too embarrassed :< I've been on TSR for a long while so it's just awkward. But thank you!
    So have I!

    Honestly, if you ever want to talk, feel free to pm me. I can go into more detail. Don't really feel like talking about my life publicly.....
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    They tried to help me but it didn't work. And I really doubt it. There's so many people on here already getting treatment yet they say that it makes little difference.
    I'm not saying the people who say it doesn't help them aren't trying hard enough... but when I was 15 they referred me for cbt and the therapist dumped me with some student to deal with me... it was **** and I just drifted off and didn't go to it anymore. I'm 24 now and I'm coming to the end of my cbt sessions that I was referred to a few months back. My therapist was good and I put aside what I knew of my previous experience with cbt and worked pretty hard. We achieved the goals we set out to achieve it. It was hard work though and I was in a terrible place when I started. If you do decide to refer yourself to cbt what I will say is try to put aside your assumptions and defensiveness about these kinds of things and be as open as possible.

    Again noone is going to force you to do anything to help yourself let alone your partner but if you don't then the years will just crank up and you'll not achieve anything or enjoy anything about life. It is very uncomfortable confronting these things but if you sit with the uncomfortableness for the duration of treatment then you can work towards a better life for yourself.
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    (Original post by Little Popcorns)
    I'm not saying the people who say it doesn't help them aren't trying hard enough... but when I was 15 they referred me for cbt and the therapist dumped me with some student to deal with me... it was **** and I just drifted off and didn't go to it anymore. I'm 24 now and I'm coming to the end of my cbt sessions that I was referred to a few months back. My therapist was good and I put aside what I knew of my previous experience with cbt and worked pretty hard. We achieved the goals we set out to achieve it. It was hard work though and I was in a terrible place when I started. If you do decide to refer yourself to cbt what I will say is try to put aside your assumptions and defensiveness about these kinds of things and be as open as possible.

    Again noone is going to force you to do anything to help yourself let alone your partner but if you don't then the years will just crank up and you'll not achieve anything or enjoy anything about life. It is very uncomfortable confronting these things but if you sit with the uncomfortableness for the duration of treatment then you can work towards a better life for yourself.
    Find Psychological therapies (IAPT) services - is it this website (for self referrals)? Lol I hope not because when I type my town, there are no results. But I'm not even surprised...I live in the middle of nowhere (Wales).
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Find Psychological therapies (IAPT) services - is it this website (for self referrals)? Lol I hope not because when I type my town, there are no results. But I'm not even surprised...I live in the middle of nowhere (Wales).
    Even more reason to speak to your GP and ask about it... there will be something available for you
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    (Original post by Little Popcorns)
    Even more reason to speak to your GP and ask about it... there will be something available for you
    More obstacles for me I guess. Still, didn't realise just how backwater my town is...
 
 
 
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