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My boyfriend's mom found out about us. :c Watch

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    (Original post by Hydeman)
    I thought that the corollary - that being in full-time education generally leaves little time for work (which you would realistically have to do if you were to support yourself with no parental help) - was quite clearly alluded to. I was wrong, it seems.

    And that costs money which, if estranged from one's parents, has to be earned through work.

    Look, I'm not here to discuss ridiculous hypotheticals in which the protagonist heroically pulls themselves up by the bootstraps against impossible odds and nor do I think that this is somehow an argument that everyone should be doing the same. You were independent at 15? Great. But most people aren't/can't be, and so they have to worry about what their parents think, and that was my main point.
    look, you are not speaking from experience...I AM!!
    hostels are completely different!! they help u with u financials and get u set up etc and rent is no more like 5 a week/month (cant remember which)

    dont try explaining something that you have no actual first hand knowledge off
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    To be honest, I do love my boyfriend but I love my parents more, and even though it would hurt, I would prefer breaking up with my boyfriend than my parents finding out that I've been with someone who doesn't share our religious beliefs + whose mom is all crazy about us being together. They wouldn't like that I've disobeyed my boyfriend's mom the first time round, to be with him, they just won't understand, and they'll have a totally different opinion of me as a person.

    As great as my boyfriend is, if his mum thinks I'm THAT BAD for him, then maybe I should just step away and stay away. But if I do, all I want, is for my parents to not know about this relationship, because if they do find out, what's the point of breaking up with him?

    Sorry if it's confusing guys, and thank you so so much for your support & advice. I'm kinda new here so I didn't expect such an overwhelming response of lovely people to help me out.
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    How about you tell your parents to get in the modern world and open their eyes to the fact that a difference in religions should not prevent two people being together. If they can't get their head around the concept you have to follow you mind and heart and do whatever you want and what ever will make you happy. You only live once and it is your human right to spend that time with people you like.
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    (Original post by keepyourapology)
    To be honest, I do love my boyfriend but I love my parents more, and even though it would hurt, I would prefer breaking up with my boyfriend than my parents finding out that I've been with someone who doesn't share our religious beliefs + whose mom is all crazy about us being together. They wouldn't like that I've disobeyed my boyfriend's mom the first time round, to be with him, they just won't understand, and they'll have a totally different opinion of me as a person.

    As great as my boyfriend is, if his mum thinks I'm THAT BAD for him, then maybe I should just step away and stay away. But if I do, all I want, is for my parents to not know about this relationship, because if they do find out, what's the point of breaking up with him?

    Sorry if it's confusing guys, and thank you so so much for your support & advice. I'm kinda new here so I didn't expect such an overwhelming response of lovely people to help me out.
    You are a person with you own brain who at 17 can make you own sensible decisions. The only reason one should end a relationship is because it is not working, not because of parents' opinions. If you feel strongly enough about you boyfriend you will make it work, even if it is hard and in the end it will be worth it because one day you'll be living away from home and free to do as you wish.

    I had similar issues with my mum when I used to live with her, what a hell hole that was. Idk why parents interfere so much.

    And RE your boyfriend's mum; religion 'ey, who needs it? If "God" really wanted people to only date their own religion he would have created little invisible walls that pop up around people when they're near a person of another religion... Seeing as he is all powerful
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    (Original post by keepyourapology)
    They wouldn't like that I've disobeyed my boyfriend's mom the first time round,
    You don't have to obey your boyfriend's mum.
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    You need to work towards independence then tell your parents the score and if your parents don't like it politely tell them to **** off

    Your parents sound like the type of people who would disown/chuck you out/acid attack you ...so this is why I suggest you be independent first.

    It's out of order IMO them restricting your dating life like this.
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    (Original post by keepyourapology)
    To be honest, I do love my boyfriend but I love my parents more, and even though it would hurt, I would prefer breaking up with my boyfriend than my parents finding out that I've been with someone who doesn't share our religious beliefs + whose mom is all crazy about us being together. They wouldn't like that I've disobeyed my boyfriend's mom the first time round, to be with him, they just won't understand, and they'll have a totally different opinion of me as a person.

    As great as my boyfriend is, if his mum thinks I'm THAT BAD for him, then maybe I should just step away and stay away. But if I do, all I want, is for my parents to not know about this relationship, because if they do find out, what's the point of breaking up with him?

    Sorry if it's confusing guys, and thank you so so much for your support & advice. I'm kinda new here so I didn't expect such an overwhelming response of lovely people to help me out.
    Just do what you think is right but just don't throw away a special relationship over his mum maybe she is acting like this/saying mean things for you to feel this way. But if it feels wrong then maybe breaking up isn't such a bad thing. I know everyone says that you should tell his mum/your parents to 'f*** off' and all the rest off it but believe me parents and culture do have a big impact on relationships and that sometimes isn't the best way to go around things. If you don't want anyone else to know then you are entitled to keep your relationship secret but if your parents do eventually find out from somewhere maybe they will be understanding, you will never know until you try but stick to what you believe in and listen to your heart because the saying goes, family before friends. And don't worry we all understand and it's not confusing at all.
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    How happy were you two being together?
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    (Original post by keepyourapology)
    So, my boyfriend and I have different religious beliefs (he's Muslim. I'm areligion) and well, neither of our parents would accept us if we told them we were together. We're both 17, but his mom found out about us a couple weeks ago, and told us off for dating, but apparently, she told him that we could go to prom together + she didn't mind us talking.

    Well, last night, my boyfriend messaged me on Steam (his mom has his phone), therefore she saw his message, which was saying something like, 'your internet connection is slow'. She got really really bloody mad, and threatened to not send him to college, and told me she might tell my parents.

    If my parents find out, theyll be so disappointed and angry, and I just don't know what to do. I've blocked him on Whatsapp and unfriended him on Facebook and I've told his mom that she can do whatever she likes, check our messages, our phones, ask people if we talk at school (my boyfriend has a twin who can keep an eye out for this), and she still seems so ANGRY, and she's so insulting to me, and I just don't know what to do.

    My number 1 priority is that my parents don't find out because I screwed up and I'm trying to rectify my ways..
    Are you in a long-distance relationship? Or do you see each other often (like do you go to the same school)?
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    (Original post by Arvin Bhambra)
    How happy were you two being together?
    Quite happy, but we had a couple fights which we worked through.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Are you in a long-distance relationship? Or do you see each other often (like do you go to the same school)?
    We go to the same school. c:
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    They will get over it , don't worry
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    what religion do you follow?
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    (Original post by Bealzibub)
    what religion do you follow?
    None. I believe in God but not religion.
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    (Original post by Hydeman)
    I thought that the corollary - that being in full-time education generally leaves little time for work (which you would realistically have to do if you were to support yourself with no parental help) - was quite clearly alluded to. I was wrong, it seems.

    And that costs money which, if estranged from one's parents, has to be earned through work.

    Look, I'm not here to discuss ridiculous hypotheticals in which the protagonist heroically pulls themselves up by the bootstraps against impossible odds and nor do I think that this is somehow an argument that everyone should be doing the same. You were independent at 15? Great. But most people aren't/can't be, and so they have to worry about what their parents think, and that was my main point.
    PRSOM.
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    (Original post by shawtyb)
    look, you are not speaking from experience...I AM!!
    hostels are completely different!! they help u with u financials and get u set up etc and rent is no more like 5 a week/month (cant remember which)

    dont try explaining something that you have no actual first hand knowledge off
    Please find me a hostel in London which charges £5 a week for you to stay there. I will move in.
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    (Original post by keepyourapology)
    So, my boyfriend and I have different religious beliefs (he's Muslim. I'm areligion) and well, neither of our parents would accept us if we told them we were together. We're both 17, but his mom found out about us a couple weeks ago, and told us off for dating, but apparently, she told him that we could go to prom together + she didn't mind us talking.

    Well, last night, my boyfriend messaged me on Steam (his mom has his phone), therefore she saw his message, which was saying something like, 'your internet connection is slow'. She got really really bloody mad, and threatened to not send him to college, and told me she might tell my parents.

    If my parents find out, theyll be so disappointed and angry, and I just don't know what to do. I've blocked him on Whatsapp and unfriended him on Facebook and I've told his mom that she can do whatever she likes, check our messages, our phones, ask people if we talk at school (my boyfriend has a twin who can keep an eye out for this), and she still seems so ANGRY, and she's so insulting to me, and I just don't know what to do.

    My number 1 priority is that my parents don't find out because I screwed up and I'm trying to rectify my ways..
    I'm sorry, I don't understand. Why would your parents be angry?
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    (Original post by Platopus)
    I'm sorry, I don't understand. Why would your parents be angry?
    They would be angry because :
    1. The intercultural differences.
    2. I didn't tell them (because I was afraid they'd get really angry and blow it out of proportion).
    3. The fact that we took it to a point where his mom had to contact me and threaten me, but we still didn't stop.
    4. The fact that we're continuing our relationship in the middle of GCSEs.
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    (Original post by keepyourapology)
    They would be angry because :
    1. The intercultural differences.
    2. I didn't tell them (because I was afraid they'd get really angry and blow it out of proportion).
    3. The fact that we took it to a point where his mom had to contact me and threaten me, but we still didn't stop.
    4. The fact that we're continuing our relationship in the middle of GCSEs.
    Hmm are your parents really strict? The way I see it, you have done nothing wrong and it would be unreasonable of them to be angry.
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    (Original post by keepyourapology)
    They would be angry because :
    1. The intercultural differences.
    2. I didn't tell them (because I was afraid they'd get really angry and blow it out of proportion).
    3. The fact that we took it to a point where his mom had to contact me and threaten me, but we still didn't stop.
    4. The fact that we're continuing our relationship in the middle of GCSEs.
    I thought you were both 17? Are you still doing your GCSEs together?
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    (Original post by keepyourapology)
    None. I believe in God but not religion.
    What's your parents faith out of interest?

    Good old religion, causing division/hatred/war since time eternal.
 
 
 
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