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    (Original post by Chocolatesoup)
    It wont let me post anon but I'm not too fussed.

    I am bummed about my fall in grade because of several reasons:

    mentally ill parent, meaning I've had a really stressful time growing up in an unpredictable environment, causing low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, etc. Going to uni and achieving something for me wouldve made me feel good about myself, it would be something to be proud of despite my *****y life at home (I couldnt move out for uni).

    Spending every weekend working as a cleaner, cleaning up ****, piss, vomit, blood, etc. whilst everyone else at uni partied hard at the weekends. I had a poor social life and began to feel resentful, but thought hey im working hard, earning money, and itll all pay off cos at least ill get a first and i can be proud of myself.

    also was in an abusive relationship with a guy who constantly put me down everyday and even said he didnt want me to go to uni. i went anyway. but the way he treated me still effects me to this day, ie low self-esteem, dont believe in my ability, get 100% on an essay but cant feel good about it because I have no sense of self worth. But yeah, getting a first overall and being able to give two fingers to that guy and prove i am worth something and im awesome at academia, thats not a big deal to you.

    i am in the real world and Ive dealt with a lot of crap, really hard crap, half of it i havent even mentioned yet. i dont want pity or sympathy, id be happy with a 2.1 cos its still a degree, but yeah i had goals and wanted to do this for me, to make me feel good, to make me believe in myself, and maybe i put too much pressure on myself to achieve a first or nothing, but maybe achieving that life goal wouldve turned things around for me.

    so maybe in the future you should get some context of the persons life before you think im being all "boo hoo i could get a 2.1" when thats not what im being like at all.
    You can't post anon as your thread has been moved to university life only the relationship threads can give you anonymity.
    There is still a chance you could get a 1st your uni may round it up.

    I know how you feel before uni I told myself I would get a 1st and there was a chance I wouldn't have got it in 3rd year but I plodded on and managed it but I did it purely to show everyone and myself I could do it as I only got C's at school and everyone thought I was thick.

    It was never done to get a better job just to prove that I could achieve it and my family member all had 2:1 or 2:2 so I was proud to get a 1st even though it may have been a shock to them as my sister and cousin are the A grade student.

    So don't listen to Katie whatever her username is i would have been devastated if I just missed out too.

    I hope and pray you get that 1st as what you have been through you deserve it.

    (Original post by KatieBlogger)
    I'm sorry - but welcome to adult life! We all have crap to deal with that other people don't know about. You wouldn't even believe what I had to go through to get my degree and I'm not about to tell you since 1. It doesn't matter 2. I got through it and 3. No one cares what anyone's dealt with anyway - sounds harsh but it's someone you learn the older you get.

    Your job as a cleaner? I worked as a HCA cleaning up bodily functions and you know what, I looked on the bright side and got to know my patients and really enjoyed the job - it's all about attitude and gratitude. We all have a cross to bear and getting stuck on one thing and hinging your happiness on it will not help. What happens if you don't get that one thing? You can't do that to yourself. You've got to look on the positive side and live in the 'now'. Your past is irrelevant and so it the future - you are here, focus on that. And if you get a 2.1 - celebrate it.
    You are completely missing the point. OP wasn't doing this for anyone else, they were doing it for themselves. It doesn't matter that no one else cares, what matters is that this is a goal that may or may not have been missed out on by less than 1% and that is naturally disappointing.

    No on gives a **** about my degree either, my boyfriend, family and friends will all still love me if I come out with a third, but will I be disappointed if I get anything less than a first? Of course, because getting a first is a goal I have set for myself and worked hard for. Do I understand that it means nothing to anyone else? Yes. Does that matter to me? No. It's my individual goal and individuals are allowed to be disappointed when they don't meet their goals.Stop trying to tell people how they should feel based on your bizarre standards for being an adult. Patronising people doesn't make you any more of an adult than anyone else, and given that you have missed the point numerous times, it's not even something you can really make any comment on.

    (Original post by Chocolatesoup)
    i just simply asked for advice on whether people thought id manage to get rounded up to a first afterall.
    Nobody here has any way of knowing. Each uni (sometimes individual departments or faculties) can set its own rules, which will be available somewhere online for yours. If you can't find them, ask your Course Leader, Student Union or departmental Admin person/people to point you in the right direction. It would have been much faster than this thread (where you still haven't found it out and you aren't going to).

    I'm sorry you feel so disappointed, but it does seem a bit pointless getting this rattled when you don't know the rules for your uni and there's still a chance that you might get the result you want. Take a deep breath, think it through and go get some information. You won't find what you're looking for on TSR.

    Let us know what your uni tells you or what you find out.

    I feel for you. You were clearly capable of getting a first and unfortunately you might not have. It is completely fine for you to feel upset or anxious. I don't really understand what other people are saying though...you are allowed to feel upset about anything. So if I broke my leg today, I shouldn't be upset because someone else may have cancer? Dumb af.
    Also, you shouldn't have felt obligated to give justification for feeling bad about a grade. As we can see your life has been hard but people shouldn't complain that you only previously explained 5%of the story. It doesn't matter.What matters is the fact that you've overcome this to do so well in uni,even if it might not be the grade you want.
    Tbh, you're quite an inspiration. But I apologise for the fact that you felt that you had to justify your feelings.
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