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The funniest joke you know?? Watch

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    What's brown and sticky?
    ...
    A stick.


    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HA!
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    Whats the difference between a police car and Sonic the hedgehog?

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    Police cars have pricks on the inside
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    What did batman say to robin before they got into the car
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    get in the car
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    (Original post by CheeseIsVeg)
    this year's A-level grade boundaries
    :fuhrer:
    LMFAOOOO
    IM DEAD
    I thought that too

    The boundaries are a joke.
    Forever will be a joke.
    • TSR Group Staff
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    TSR Group Staff
    I went to the local video shop and I said, 'Can I borrow Batman Forever?'
    He said, 'No, you'll have to bring it back tomorrow'
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    The Labour Party
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    TSR Group Staff
    "So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?"

    I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'"
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    One day, a thousand years ago in the then wealthy city of Baghdad, there lived a very successful merchant Zafr and his servant Ahmed. One day Zafr said to Ahmed, "I have decided that tonight I will have a great feast for all the nobles of the city! Take this money, go to the market and buy the best food and drink you can find!". "Don't worry master, I won't let you down!", Ahmed said as he left. However he wasn't looking forward to going to the market since he knew it would be hot and crowded - and sure enough it was. As he was pushing through the crowd, he felt someone tug at his sleeve. He took one look at the face of the man who had pulled his sleeve, froze, and ran all the way home! When he arrived Zafr said, "Ahmed, you are back quickly! Have you done as I asked?" and Ahmed replied "No master, but I have a good reason! You see, someone pulled on my sleeve in the market, so I ran away!". "You silly boy, why did you run away?!". And Ahmed replied, "It was Death who pulled my sleeve! He glared at me so I ran away! I must leave and hide quickly - I will ride straight to my friend Habib's house, Death will never find me there." And Zafr agreed that would be a good idea. So Ahmed rode off as fast as he could, and Zafr went to the market to find Death. He found him standing in a dark corner, and marched up to him angrily. "Why did you scare my servant Ahmed like that! You shouldn't glare at people like that." And Death said, "I didn't glare at him! I gave him a look of surprise!". "Well what were you surprised about?" And Death replied, "I was surprised to meet him at the market when I have an appointment with him at Habib's house in an hour!"
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    (Original post by AppleB)
    LMFAOOOO
    IM DEAD
    I thought that too
    The boundaries are a joke.
    Forever will be a joke.
    Life is a joke somtimes
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    (Original post by CheeseIsVeg)
    Life is a joke somtimes

    Yes
    I agree
    It is!!
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    What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a sweatshirt?
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    A woolly jumper

    Sorry, everyone. I'll leave before I make anyone else groan. :getmecoat:
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    Why are fish easy to weigh?
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    They've got their own scales
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    2016
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    An English teacher is teaching a group of children on their first day of primary school. "You're in primary school now, so I want you to start using more grown-up words now" she said. "I want you all to tell me what you did last night, and using adult words."

    A boy put his hand up. "I watched the telly last night"

    "No, that's not using adult words", said the teacher. "You watched the television, not the telly."

    A girl put her hand up. "I went to see my granny last night"

    "No, that's not using adult words either", said the teacher. "You went to see your grandmother"

    Another boy put his hand up. "My mum read a book to me last night."

    "Excellent!" said the teacher. "That's using adult words! So what book did she read to you?"

    The boy thinks about this for a second, and replies confidently "Winnie the s**t"
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    A man goes to a pharmacy to buy some condoms. When he hands them over at the checkout, the pharmacist remarks "Ohh, lucky you! You getting married soon?"

    "Well, not exactly", the man replies. "I'm going to a girl's house tonight for dinner, and she's introducing to me to her parents. After dinner we'll go upstairs and see what happens.. Not sure how we'll do it without her parents noticing, but believe me, I'll make sure we find a way."

    The pharmacist doesn't reply, just completes the transaction and gives the man his condoms.

    Later that night, the man goes round to the girl's house, and she introduces him to her parents. When they are all at the table for dinner, the parents ask them to say grace. When everyone is finished saying grace and starts eating, the man continues to pray.

    The girl leans over to him and whispers "You didn't tell me you were so religious"

    The man looks up and whispers back "You didn't tell me your dad was a pharmacist"
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    And finally, a personal favourite:

    A man was rushed to hospital with six plastic horses up his arse.

    The doctors described his condition as stable.
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    (Original post by Laurajayne1)
    Heres mine... A man calls a butchers and asks them if they have pigs feet.. They reply with 'yes we do!' to which the man replies with 'Well, where do you get your shoes from?'

    That's the best i can do i'm sorry... so so sorry
    My love life
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    Britain Stronger in Europe :laugh:

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    (Original post by SpiritSharD)
    My life.

    (Original post by retro_turtles)
    me
    stop that!
 
 
 
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