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    (Original post by DanGrover)
    I like the pun in the title.
    I did too.

    OP: feel free to PM me if you want rep for that post, it deserves it. If not don't worry.
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    (Original post by DanGrover)
    I like the pun in the title.
    I try my best :cool:
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    Does anyone know of triggers for depression?
    One thing I would say is, be careful with drugs. Now, I'm not against drugs - many people use them in moderation without experiencing long term negative effects. However, if you're predisposed towards a mental disorder just one bad experience can trigger long-lasting problems. I had no idea I was predisposed towards depression and anxiety until I tried hash cake.
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    (Original post by WorkHouse)
    As a general thought - could you be more specific?
    It depends on the person... by "reading something about it" I mean reading stories about depression, or other people's experiences, reading about self harm, reading fact sheets, learning about a specific topic even at school/uni.
    And by "seeing something" again it depends on the reasons why the person is depressed. But for me it can be photos, objects in my room, just walking in a place can trigger people, seeing scars, anything like it. It really depends on the person though, this is just my take on it.
    • #3
    #3

    This is a great post. Hopefully it'll contribute to the understanding of this vile crappy, ****ed up condition for those on the outside.

    After going to the GP a couple of months ago and then being refered to a triage nurse... I was given a clean bill of health. It's amazing really, I basically listed EXACTLY what symptoms I'd been feeling, which where effectively everything listed in the whole depression package and was told that I was 'too serious' and should attend some self confidence course. I was having a good day then, probably because I felt I was finally going to get some help with this *******, so maybe that contributed to me being diagnosed as being in the all clear.

    Anyway, for the next few months I was feeling comparitively happy or really burned out and broken in 2 week intervals, without any real cause. A few weeks ago I'd really had enough, my positive mood just seemed to crumble and I'd gone into a state lower than I'd ever been before. I'm usually not an emotional guy, but I just burst out crying in the sitting room. I cracked completely. The upside is that my parents are supporting me 100% in going to see the doctor again next week, hopefully this time I'll actually get some treatment.

    I spent an entire hour today staring at my feet as I lay on the sofa, completely vacant of any emotion except for resignation and despair. I've been feeling more and more like this recently. I can't get excited or interested, or anything. My vocabularly is piss poor these days, I can't seem to form opinions, ideas or questions. My curiosity and wonder at life has fled. My memory is so poor now that I'll leave my glasses down for just a few seconds and then forget where I put them. Sometimes I forget what I had for dinner just hours after.

    The disturbing thing is... that as far as I can remember, for my teenage years I've always been a little more emotionally deader than everyone else, I've always been absent minded and a poor communicator. I'm no typical teenager, I don't get interested in fashion, sports or anything of the sort. Maybe I've been suffering from a low grade form of depression from an early age? Dysthymia maybe? I've always had a fairly low opinion of myself since primary school when I was bullied, but now at 17 in secondary school I'm a well liked character. I have a good deal going for me, but my mood can't seem to adapt to it. It's like having a present but being unable to tear the wrapping off.

    The worrying thing is, I'm beginning to think it's an inbuilt personality trait. That I'm simply such a weak character that I can't be any other way. That maybe I am inherently dull and boring, without any thirst for life. That the depression thesis may simply be some sort of twisted excuse for a crap personality. I don't want to be dour, but maybe that's just what I am.
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    Depression is just a way of life. I have not had any friends in my life, those that want to go out with me, find out how my life is doing, really care about me, feel excited for me, feel sad for me....Thougth about killing myself from 11 plus, life is rubbish. I am a loner. I may have lots of people around me but who really cares. Phone has not text since June. I am not a bad person, just I dont fit in any where. Cant stop crying sometimes. Self harmed. Anti depressents. Went to Uni to make friends, found it hard. Tried to overdose. No one cares. This is life isnt it? Trying to make more friends. Do I give up or continue trying?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    This is a great post. Hopefully it'll contribute to the understanding of this vile crappy, ****ed up condition for those on the outside.

    After going to the GP a couple of months ago and then being refered to a triage nurse... I was given a clean bill of health. It's amazing really, I basically listed EXACTLY what symptoms I'd been feeling, which where effectively everything listed in the whole depression package and was told that I was 'too serious' and should attend some self confidence course. I was having a good day then, probably because I felt I was finally going to get some help with this *******, so maybe that contributed to me being diagnosed as being in the all clear.

    Anyway, for the next few months I was feeling comparitively happy or really burned out and broken in 2 week intervals, without any real cause. A few weeks ago I'd really had enough, my positive mood just seemed to crumble and I'd gone into a state lower than I'd ever been before. I'm usually not an emotional guy, but I just burst out crying in the sitting room. I cracked completely. The upside is that my parents are supporting me 100% in going to see the doctor again next week, hopefully this time I'll actually get some treatment.

    I spent an entire hour today staring at my feet as I lay on the sofa, completely vacant of any emotion except for resignation and despair. I've been feeling more and more like this recently. I can't get excited or interested, or anything. My vocabularly is piss poor these days, I can't seem to form opinions, ideas or questions. My curiosity and wonder at life has fled. My memory is so poor now that I'll leave my glasses down for just a few seconds and then forget where I put them. Sometimes I forget what I had for dinner just hours after.

    The disturbing thing is... that as far as I can remember, for my teenage years I've always been a little more emotionally deader than everyone else, I've always been absent minded and a poor communicator. I'm no typical teenager, I don't get interested in fashion, sports or anything of the sort. Maybe I've been suffering from a low grade form of depression from an early age? Dysthymia maybe? I've always had a fairly low opinion of myself since primary school when I was bullied, but now at 17 in secondary school I'm a well liked character. I have a good deal going for me, but my mood can't seem to adapt to it. It's like having a present but being unable to tear the wrapping off.

    The worrying thing is, I'm beginning to think it's an inbuilt personality trait. That I'm simply such a weak character that I can't be any other way. That maybe I am inherently dull and boring, without any thirst for life. That the depression thesis may simply be some sort of twisted excuse for a crap personality. I don't want to be dour, but maybe that's just what I am.
    Just about to go sleep, so not going to comment extensively till tomorrow - but would say you are not alone, and that alot of what you are feeling is incredibly similar to me. Although I was never bullied I've had a fairly abnormal life so far (family-wise), and this had lead me recently to have the same experience - even when before I was pretty emotionless. I'd just like to give you some virtual support, and know that you will be back and brighter than ever! Another beautiful post.
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    (Original post by blackswan)
    It depends on the person... by "reading something about it" I mean reading stories about depression, or other people's experiences, reading about self harm, reading fact sheets, learning about a specific topic even at school/uni.
    And by "seeing something" again it depends on the reasons why the person is depressed. But for me it can be photos, objects in my room, just walking in a place can trigger people, seeing scars, anything like it. It really depends on the person though, this is just my take on it.
    So someone reads something on depression and they what, decide to suffer from it? I thought we were talking about actual depression here, not trend/emo depression.
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    (Original post by ~ems~)
    So someone reads something on depression and they what, decide to suffer from it? I thought we were talking about actual depression here, not trend/emo depression.
    no, dah.
    I wasn't talking about causes! I was talking about triggers. As in for someone who already suffers.
    :rolleyes:
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    Can this thread be made a "sticky"? I think it would be good be one of those threads that stays at the top always.
    • #4
    #4

    I've been feeling this way since near the end (around November IIRC) of last year. I'm fairly sure it's not just teenage angst.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    cheers for posting this. I've been considering going to the doc's for a while now about feeling 'down' but having read through the list of symptoms above, it's made me realise that I can relate to every (but one) symptom listed.

    I lost my Mum a year and a bit ago but now the feeling of 'oh she's happier now, in a better place with no suffering' (she deteriorated badly very quickly) has been replaced with a sense of emptiness and a immense feeling of sadness when I think about her, if someone who doesnt know asks about my 'mum and dad' or even if someone talks about their Mum around me

    Even though that's mainly why I've been feeling 'down' for a while now, there are many other things that I feel have brought me down too, from way back in my childhood to things that have happened recently.

    For a while I have felt completely a shadow of my former self, I used to be quite an optimistic person but now I cant really find many things to be happy about. Even something good happens or I've got something to look forward to, negativity overshadows it

    I'm tired all the time (although working long hours might be the reason) and I'm eating much more than I used to, it sort of feels like I've lost all my willpower

    Most prominent though, I guess, is my constant anxiety. I feel it all the time,at work,driving, even when socialising with mates. It's really getting me down and is the main reason I'm considering going to the Doc's and asking about counselling/CBT.
    :hugs: and good luck with going to your GP. I have all but 2 of the symptoms in the 2nd half of the list and I don't actually know what anhedonia means so don't know if I have one or 2 in the first half. But definitely going to your GP is a good idea.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Is it odd to REALLY be afraid of dying from an illness/condition? and want to have complete control over when (and how) I die? I've come to the decision that I'd rather 'do it myself' than have something like cancer etc. take me. I think this has a lot to do with seeing my Mum in a bad way, even though she was expected to get better.. she didn't. No matter how many times I hear that treatments are advancing all the time, I just don't think I could 'trust' them enough to make me better if I fell ill with a serious illness/disease.
    If it's odd, then so am I. I don't think it's weird personally. I would far rather choose when and how I die than leave it to chance.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I can't get the idea of however bad it gets, suicide is always an option out of my head. the constant thoughts of death and suicide nag away at me and I've had enough. I'm fed up and bored with life atm, which is weird becuse I've finally got a job and something to do with my days!

    To be honest, I really can't stand myself at the minute.

    Apologies for the long and rambling post but I really needed to get it off my chest and try to make sense of what I'm feeling inside myself.
    I know that feeling. I have so much going for me (I'm about to start uni studying something I love and I also have some really amazing friends) but I am so close to giving up the fight. For me, I just don't have the energy any more and suicide is looking ever more appealing . But there should always be someone who cares about you and please try to hang on for them - could be anyone close to you, friends, family, whoever. :hugs:

    And it's good that you could get that all off your chest. I really hope you feel better soon.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've been feeling this way since near the end (around November IIRC) of last year. I'm fairly sure it's not just teenage angst.
    Me too. I didn't get help until March though. So glad I did.

    And from reading your previous post (I mean, I can't diagnose over the internet and I am never going to be a doctor, I want to be a politician ) it sounds a lot worse than teenage angst.

    :hugs:
    • #4
    #4

    (Original post by AverageGuyOnTheStreet)
    :hugs: and good luck with going to your GP. I have all but 2 of the symptoms in the 2nd half of the list and I don't actually know what anhedonia means so don't know if I have one or 2 in the first half. But definitely going to your GP is a good idea.
    to be honest, I really want to go to my GP and get a professional opinion on it but I just can't pluck up the courage i wouldn't know how to start the conversation. I need a repeat prescription for my migraine tablets so maybe I could casually slip in something about how I'm feeling?

    also, how can the GP determine if it's depression/ an anxiety disorder or whatever and not just feeling a bit down?


    If it's odd, then so am I. I don't think it's weird personally. I would far rather choose when and how I die than leave it to chance.
    when I was out clubbing one night with old school mates, I heard that one of the teachers at my old school had terminal cancer and that just confirmed it for me. I REALLY don't want to go that way I'd really rather do it myself. that I was thinking that while out clubbing for goodness sake! I did have a good night otherwise though

    I know that feeling. I have so much going for me (I'm about to start uni studying something I love and I also have some really amazing friends) but I am so close to giving up the fight. For me, I just don't have the energy any more and suicide is looking ever more appealing . But there should always be someone who cares about you and please try to hang on for them - could be anyone close to you, friends, family, whoever. :hugs:

    And it's good that you could get that all off your chest. I really hope you feel better soon.
    I'm going to uni to do something I love as well, can't wait I don't think I could go through with suicide though (not while I'm healthy anyway) for the simple reason that I couldn't do it to my family or friends.

    I just wish I could shake off this constantly feeling crap feeling.


    I really appreciate the reply, thankyou

    hope you're feeling better soon too
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    OP, this is a really really good thread.
    Blackswan, that was a good list of triggers. That has always been the problem for me, that I get triggered back into a depressive cycle way too easily. I can be out with friends or in work and I'll see a scar on my arm or someone will say something that is actually just them messing around and I'll psych out on them. Sometimes I hate just being around other people in case I get one of my moods and I just collapse.
    Sorry, didn't mean to ramble off on a little tangent there.
    • #3
    #3

    I'm on an upper now. I've made a couple of social plans and feel... cautiously good. It's so odd, this happens every other 2 weeks or so... and when it does I wonder how I coulda ever felt like I did. But I *know* it's going to come round the bend again... these periods are like 'probation'. God, what a horrible illness.
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    OP pm me, I want to rep you
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    Hi,

    I just want to say thanks again to those people who said they found it useful.

    Just so you know, I won't be PMing people to ask for rep - so if anyone does you know it's an imposter :ninja:

    Rep wasn't the motivation behind this post. (I have enough of that anyway - and combined with other snippets of information I've given away on this thread I'm sure some of you will work out who I am. I'm happy about that and I only went anon because I don't want this post permanently associated with my account for personal and career reasons). Please continue to link people to this thread if you think it will help them - an outside view can help a little bit
    • #5
    #5

    Hi, just need some advice...

    I went to my GP last year finally to sort out what I felt like was depression (feeling suicidal, not sleeping, always worrying) but she totally patronised me and said its probably just because I'm a teen and its probably just hormonal, but I can tell when I just randomly get all sensitive because I'm a teenager and when I am genuinely feeling depressed - or do you all think its because I have teen angst?!

    I'm not your stereotypical teenager who hates their parents, has a troublesome crowd of friends etc

    I think too much about things, perhaps thats my problem?? Lately I found I can't eat throughout the day, its just too difficult for me and I don't know why, I feel like I don't deserve to eat, that I should be doing my work - but this isn't usually when I feel suicidal, just very driven by my goals, but after phases like that I just suddenly come crashing down, my confidence goes, I binge eat and I don't do any work, I don't see the point, I'm going to be a failure in life, no one would really miss me except perhaps my mum. These phases can happen at any time, I don't know why...when I was slightly younger I was always depressive in the winter, I know someone in my family has SAD.

    Also, are suicidal thoughts normal? I get mixed messages, I once told a friend 'oh don't you just feel like killing yourself sometimes' and she was quite shocked...But when I went to tell this GP I get suicidal shes just like 'it's a phase, your a teenager'

    Anyway, for the past month I've been wasting away, working hard, but this weekend I've crashed down again, I would have killed myself yesterday if I had the right 'tools' to do so but I would have had to go downstairs and someone would have noticed I'm not happy. I know I'll be like this for a while now.

    To get to the point, should I bother getting help?

    Thanks xx
    • #5
    #5

    actually change that 'would' in the last bit to 'could' - I can't think straight.
 
 
 
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