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    Some girls will stay in a maybe unsatisfactory relationship and wait till they have the next guy lined up before they break off the first relationship its all about insecurity, some girls think they need a guy and afraid of being single and being alone.
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    (Original post by shady lane)
    I've always wondered this. Why is it that some girls can get one boyfriend after another and are hardly ever single, while others never get boyfriends? It doesn't seem to have anything to do with looks, as I know plenty of "boyfriend girls" who are plain and "boyfriend seekers" who are very pretty?

    I know personality makes a difference, but I wonder if there's a certain trait that guys like that makes them actually become a girl's boyfriend, rather than just date her casually or something.
    prettier girls can be very fussy when picking guys. plainer girls sometimes are more down to earth, not meaning to come across as shallow are anything. im not a girlfriend girl, i think its really boring if your in a relationship. when your single you can be really wild. i have always prefered it much better when im not in a relationship. single and luvin it soo much!!!
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    (Original post by Blondybeachbum)
    Ever noticed it's not just girls that are serial relationship seekers? I know plenty of guys, popular, unpopular, hot, not, geeky, dumb etc... all the catagories you could possibly imagine who are just as much relationship hoppers as women.

    Jonas...breathe hunni. Have you spoke to her about how you feel?

    xXx
    nope, and i dnt think i can. it hurts.
    but hey, cud be a lot worse
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    I had friends at school who were like this, most of them were extremely insecure in themselves and the only thing they knew to do was to be an easy lay. One girl in particular, who wasn't very attractive and was rather large would always turn to sex when it came to guys - she put out, in the hope of receiving love, which she never got - she just got shagged and dumped.

    Another girl in my year went from relationship to relationship and everyone talked about it. I personally think she was another girl with more of the same insecurities - turning to sex as a way to avoid confronting the things she's insecure about.

    I'm single, I've been single for most, if not all of my teenage years. I guy mate of mine told me he found me intimidating before he got to know me. That, and being shy - and I'm pretty much screwed in the relationship dept lol.
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    (Original post by TopCat06)
    same here, i know one of my friends whos like this. its tedious to say the least. because she would go out with a guy for ages, like a year or more lets say. its very annoying when such people (notably chavs) put up msn names like 'a love 'so and so' a hell of a lot'. btw, this girl breaks up with guys then literally a day after goes out with another one. its bloody weird...anyone have any reasons why this may be?
    Your friend is most definitely insecure and incapable of being on her own, (or at least that's what she will believe). She most likely needs affection, to feel valued and to have somebody she can turn to 24/7. Some people do; my mate is exactly like this. She just can't bear to feel she doesn't have anybody to love.
    I think it has a lot to do with your relationship with your parents. If you don't get enough unconditional love at home, you go for the nearest thing and you'll do anything to keep it. And if you happen to lose it, you'll grab it again as quickly as you can. It's really sad, especially as jumping into a relationship almost inevitably means it won't last. That's my 2-pence there anyhoo.
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    (Original post by lacey16)
    prettier girls can be very fussy when picking guys. plainer girls sometimes are more down to earth, not meaning to come across as shallow are anything. im not a girlfriend girl, i think its really boring if your in a relationship. when your single you can be really wild. i have always prefered it much better when im not in a relationship. single and luvin it soo much!!!
    If you're attractive enough to be able to play the field then hats off to you, but as a plainer girl I prefer to be in a relationship with someone special. I found being single to be quite a sad boring experience so I don't feel like I'm missing out.
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    (Original post by shady lane)
    Why is it that some girls can get one boyfriend after another and are hardly ever single, while others never get boyfriends?
    There is the issue of girls not being able to convey an image of a "good girlfriend material". Girls who appear a bit easy, insecure, seek validation desperately: they will get less guys willing to commit to a relationship.

    But it's not a matter of number of offers, or the amount of interest they get from the opposite sex. Some girls will just settle with whichever guy is available at the time and aren't too worried if this guy isn't the best guy they could get. It's not so much the person they go out with, who made them want to have a boyfriend. They just enjoy the comfort and advantages of having a boyfriend, whoever that person may end up being. I'm surprised at uni by the number of girls who were ashamed of the idea of having to admit they're single, as if being single meant you're unattractive or willing to sleep with anyone.

    Guys aren't so hung up on the "status" that having a girlfriend brings, although they still do care.

    What pisses me off are people who think that having a girlfriend/boyfriend means you must be more attractive to the opposite sex, than people who are single. That's just a load of *******S. Anyone can get a girlfriend/boyfriend. Just some people are looking for different things.

    Personally, I know that even if I was much more attractive to the opposite sex, I would have still struggled to be in a committed relationship these past few years.
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    hmm I have noticed it as well! most poeple say( and I possibly agree) that its confidence, or how well you can relax in a group and have fun. Because if a guy can't at least have fun withe girl he's dating, and if he has to constantly reassure her I guess that could get annoying!
    personality maybe? Something, like maybe they smile a lot because you could be surprised how much differnce a smile makes...
    I hope that helped, but to be fair I have no idea either...lol
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    probs cos they lyk da company tbh
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    (Original post by sufiankane)
    probs cos they lyk da company tbh
    Well it's all about the question: "What's more important to me? Having 'company' and being seen as 'taken' even if it's with the wrong person or Being with the right person, even if that means having to be single for a while?"
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    (Original post by Sticky)
    Anyone can get a girlfriend/boyfriend.
    That's reassuring. :rolleyes:
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    (Original post by Crimson Black)
    That's reassuring. :rolleyes:
    If you're willing to "settle" for second (or third, forth....) best then of course. Just find some desperate girl who would be so happy to have some attention from a guy like you and hey presto.

    I've had mates act like they're studs "because they have a girlfriend" and I've never had the heart to tell them "it's not because you've convinced one really not-so-attractive girl to be your girlfriend that you're attractive to the whole female population". The weird thing is that the immediate connection that's made in people's brains is that single people = people who can't attract the opposite sex, people in relationships = people who are attractive to the opposite sex. It's totally incorrect and I'd even say that the opposite remark would be more true.
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    Has anyone considered that they are just good company? Perhaps it's just that as soon as they become single their friends (guys) who already liked their company and had been wishing they didn't have a boyfriend, quickly ask them out before they lose the chance and some other guy makes a play for them. Maybe the girl likes the company too and rather than going out looking for random guys they prefer to go out with guys they know and like. Going out doesn't always mean they are having sex either. Maybe that's another reason the guys like them as they don't put out as soon as they get together so they build up the relationship before having sex. I think it's a lot about having self respect, high personal standards and being good company.
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    (Original post by MHL1)
    Perhaps it's just that as soon as they become single their friends (guys) who already liked their company and had been wishing they didn't have a boyfriend, quickly ask them out before they lose the chance and some other guy makes a play for them.
    Although the rest of your post makes sense, I really have to disagree with this bit. I personally know very few guys who reason that way. Guys, because of pride, very rarely go for sloppy seconds, unless it's to get some "benefits" i.e. I know girls who have been with several guys who were friends but usually it's just the guys saying to eachother "have a go at her, she's pretty good in bed and you can dump her after a few weeks".
    But usually guys will not go for a girl who has been with a friend and certainly will not "wait" for the girl to be single, unless they lack pride.

    Of course, there are so many different types of girls who are serial girlfriends. I usually first think of the type who simply like the "label", the advantages and the "status" that having a boyfriend brings and don't care so much about who it is (i.e. it doesn't really matter if the guy isn't the perfect match, as long as he fills her needs, no pun intended).
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    I didn't think for a second the guys were waiting around. Maybe they are choosy too and also in their mid twenties so realise there is more to relationships than just sex. They also may not be friends with the ex boyfriend so don't have that holding them back.
    Where's the sloppy seconds come from? I'm talking about high quality girls with self respect who don't sleep around, are good company and who have lots of guys as friends only. Some of these friends want more and make a move when the girl becomes free. They go out just as friends for a long time before moving on to the next stage while deciding if they are a good fit.
    It's just the same for guys, some are higher quality than others and don't just chase anything in a skirt. They have standards and want more than just sex from a girl.
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    ok fair enough but I'm struggling to really picture the situation i.e. a girl who has loads of male friends who don't really know eachother or hang out with eachother so that when she's going out with one, none of these friends see her with him. It sounds more like something out of Sex and The City (a programme that I reckon will be the cause of a lot of relationship trouble for many girls entering their twenties now) than anything resembling reality.

    Even then, if a girl really seeks guys who are a perfect fit, so that she couldn't imagine being with someone better, she's not going to limit herself to these friends. If she did, it would be like, as soon as another friend makes a move, she just accepts, instead of her having a proactive attitude where she goes out looking for the type of guy she wants. The type of girl you describe still sounds to me like the type I described: a girl who isn't too picky about who she ends up with, as long as she has the comfort of having a boyfriend.
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    I have to say I have done the going out with someone not long after I split up with someone, but my heart really wasn't in the previous relationship and I liked my now-boyfriend a lot as he did me but he didn't act on it as I was with my ex, and he said he respected me because even though I was with someone (and a lot of girls do this which I think is wrong) I didn't flirt with anyone or allow them to flirt with me, it's nothing to do with the 'status' of having a boyfriend, I love him now (liked him when we got together) so if you wanna go out with someone, what's the problem, it shouldn't matter about gaps or sexual politics, if you like someone go for it I say! And he is a very nice guy just to add, not the type to sleep around when he is with someone it's for keeps, infact we are planning to get married soon so yay! ^_^;
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    Obviously some of the friends know each other but not all. Also this type of girl says no to lots of offers and is happy to be without a guy until they get an offer from someone they like being with. Anyway why be proactive looking for strangers that you know nothing about when there are plenty of decent guys around that you already know. Having a relationship lets you find out what you want in a partner and what you don't want so that you get it right when you finally settle down.
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    (Original post by MHL1)
    Obviously some of the friends know each other but not all. Also this type of girl says no to lots of offers and is happy to be without a guy until they get an offer from someone they like being with. Anyway why be proactive looking for strangers that you know nothing about when there are plenty of decent guys around that you already know. Having a relationship lets you find out what you want in a partner and what you don't want so that you get it right when you finally settle down.
    I probably have a different view of relationships because if I want to be with someone, I know it after meeting them, and getting to know them, not because it's their "turn" and I'm available at this point in time.

    I can't be friends with someone who I'd like to be with just because I'm currently with number 56 and she's number 58.

    I reckon you know if you might want to be with someone quite quickly. Just getting boyfriends/girlfriends from your list of friends really lacks any form of passion but then again that's my opinion.
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    Because they're easy and brought up on a council estate with 18y/o mum.
 
 
 
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