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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    lol kmn
    You would be amazed at how Jesus can heal, all you have to do is believe.
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    Your situation certainly isn't envious and it will be a struggle but it's something you just have to persevere with. I'd recommend at your university you try and find some like minded people and see if you can find anyone in a similar scenario. One of my friends is a gay Muslim (more of was as he is an atheist) and lives his life secretly at university away from his family.

    If you can find someone with a common experience (such as disillusionment with family) and also find a way to support yourself economically (most student unions have positions at their various outlets including bars Iif you don't mind that kind of work) to move out. You're 18 so you have the legal rights to go for your own destiny. Most importantly good luck managing yourself over these years.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You see this sounds all well and good but I can't see myself doing it :/ I'd say maintaining a relationship with my family is not very important, it would be impossible anyway. I don't know how I would cut myself off though. I don't think they would let me leave...
    There was this disabled veteran, couldn't walk without crutches for 15 years, he started a yoga program and really went for it, months later he couldn't just walk, but sprint all on his own. That didn't happen by him starting off with the mentality of 'I can't see myself doing this' or 'my legs won't let me walk'.

    What I'm trying to get at here, is that if you want something enough, you make it happen. There are countless examples of people doing far harder things than moving out of home. So if you want to move out, if that's the better option for you, make it happen. There is surely a way to do it, so find it. If you don't move out, that's fine too. But it shouldn't be something to complain about, because by not doing anything to change your situation, you've made that choice for yourself, it is the path you are choosing to take. Not something your parents or anyone else is forcing on you.
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    Islam and the 3rd world just seem to go hand in hand.
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    Why won't they let you move into uni halls? Tbh look around and see if there are any spare rooms left and see if you can get one and move out. They can't keep a hold of you for the rest of your life.
    Also the more you make yourself the victim in this situation with them (victim complex) ie doing everything they say, the more they'll get a power hold over you. Say no to them a couple of time and watch how they'll back away
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    (Original post by TheeAndrewRyan)
    Your situation certainly isn't envious and it will be a struggle but it's something you just have to persevere with. I'd recommend at your university you try and find some like minded people and see if you can find anyone in a similar scenario. One of my friends is a gay Muslim (more of was as he is an atheist) and lives his life secretly at university away from his family.

    If you can find someone with a common experience (such as disillusionment with family) and also find a way to support yourself economically (most student unions have positions at their various outlets including bars Iif you don't mind that kind of work) to move out. You're 18 so you have the legal rights to go for your own destiny. Most importantly good luck managing yourself over these years.
    Yes I hope I meet some people like that.
    Working at a bar is a no go. I dress like someone who lives in a 7th century desert. Sucks how I can be identified as a Muslim from a mile away. Getting a part-time job should be fine though, so that is something I'll have to look for soon.
    Thanks.


    (Original post by SirKyrgystan)
    There was this disabled veteran, couldn't walk without crutches for 15 years, he started a yoga program and really went for it, months later he couldn't just walk, but sprint all on his own. That didn't happen by him starting off with the mentality of 'I can't see myself doing this' or 'my legs won't let me walk'.

    What I'm trying to get at here, is that if you want something enough, you make it happen. There are countless examples of people doing far harder things than moving out of home. So if you want to move out, if that's the better option for you, make it happen. There is surely a way to do it, so find it. If you don't move out, that's fine too. But it shouldn't be something to complain about, because by not doing anything to change your situation, you've made that choice for yourself, it is the path you are choosing to take. Not something your parents or anyone else is forcing on you.
    Moving out makes so many questions arise. First and foremost, my parents would not be able to handle it. They would be completely against it and there is actually no way they would cut ties. My parents have relatives who they often don't get along with but they have maintained their relations almost solely because 'that's what Islam says'. I don't know if Islam makes an exception for apostates however. There would also be repercussions of other relatives finding out. And everyone would think I have become corrupt or something. Recently my dad said he is already tired of life and now I am bothering him too.

    Also it makes me think of what would I take with me. Would I take all my clothes or only a couple of outfits? Would I take my phone, my laptop? Because, ultimately, everything I own was bought with my father's money. I suppose I do own anything they have bought me though. Would I even tell my parents or just leave them a note? :confused::confused::confused::confused:
    Staying at home is inevitably going to be bad. I will never be the person my parents want me to be.


    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Islam and the 3rd world just seem to go hand in hand.
    Sad truth.

    (Original post by Pinkberry_y)
    Why won't they let you move into uni halls? Tbh look around and see if there are any spare rooms left and see if you can get one and move out. They can't keep a hold of you for the rest of your life.
    Also the more you make yourself the victim in this situation with them (victim complex) ie doing everything they say, the more they'll get a power hold over you. Say no to them a couple of time and watch how they'll back away
    I actually have a habit of saying "no" to my parents, something they are understandably not pleased with. (Like I said in my original post, I am not the perfect child.)
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You see this sounds all well and good but I can't see myself doing it :/ I'd say maintaining a relationship with my family is not very important, it would be impossible anyway. I don't know how I would cut myself off though. I don't think they would let me leave...
    You're 18. You don't need their permission legally.
 
 
 
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