Love yourself before you get into a relationship? Agree or disagree?

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    Although I don't think it is vital it would be great to do so. You shouldn’t rely on someone to higher up your self worth. It should be a personal journey with yourself. If that person leaves you, would you still maintain your self esteem and that is the question.
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    (Original post by loveleest)
    Although I don't think it is vital it would be great to do so. You shouldn’t rely on someone to higher up your self worth. It should be a personal journey with yourself. If that person leaves you, would you still maintain your self esteem and that is the question.
    This is the crux of the issue. If your self esteem is dependent on someone else, it's not really self esteem. It's holding your partner in high esteem. Having experienced a complete loss of all sense of esteem after a relationship, I can safely say it is not happiness or healthy to not love yourself before a relationship.
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    (Original post by AlexLawrence1453)
    This is the crux of the issue. If your self esteem is dependent on someone else, it's not really self esteem. It's holding your partner in high esteem. Having experienced a complete loss of all sense of esteem after a relationship, I can safely say it is not happiness or healthy to not love yourself before a relationship.
    I feel like most people fall in love woth how the person makes them feel rather than the actual person so when the person stops making them feel a certain way, they leave them (I heard this in a video on youtube by a wise man). I guess selflove is a lifelong journey and even when I enter a relationship, my happiness will still come from me and I'll continue validating myself. The other person can only enhance my happiness. This will also help me if the relationship ends because there will be less pain/heartbreak so loving yourself is essentially protecting/preserving yourself. Who agrees?
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    (Original post by Secretnerd123)
    I feel like most people fall in love woth how the person makes them feel rather than the actual person so when the person stops making them feel a certain way, they leave them (I heard this in a video on youtube by a wise man). I guess selflove is a lifelong journey and even when I enter a relationship, my happiness will still come from me and I'll continue validating myself. The other person can only enhance my happiness. This will also help me if the relationship ends because there will be less pain/heartbreak so loving yourself is essentially protecting/preserving yourself. Who agrees?
    Losing these feelings isn't what I'd call protecting yourself. Pain and heartbreak are an essential experience to help you learn more about yourself and what you want out of life. It helps with making it bearable, for sure.
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    100% right. If you don't love yourself, it's likely you'll be used and abused by your partner even unwittingly. You need a hefty dose of self-respect not to take any **** or let other people treat you badly. A healthy relationship needs reciprocity and if one party has no self-esteem, power differentials will develop and you'll end up very unhappy.

    Tldr; disregard females, acquire currency.
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    Agreed. Otherwise brings too much insecurity and trust issues.
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    Yeah i agree.
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    Agree to an extent...

    You should love yourself anyway (not just in a relationship), but to an extent.

    What I mean is, if you're up there on your high horse with only a superiority complex to keep you company, then personally, I can find that rather repulsing.

    Love yourself enough not to feel soul-crushingly insecure, but also leave room to be loved is what I guess I'm trying saying.
 
 
 
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