Feeling so alone…

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I will do and you will too!
    Thank you.
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    Your mum sounds like a really nasty s.hitty parent. I feel bad for you seriously, what a c.rappy situation. Focus on the here and now. What you need to do to accomplish your current goals. But try this. Get somewhere quite, calm yourself, close your eyes, visualise what your life could be like five, or even ten years from now. Imagine, in as much depth as possible, just how gloriously fantastic your future life could be. Then slowly imagine the tracks you need to take to obtain that wonderful life. Then again, return to this ideal future life and reveal in the thought of it. I wish you the best of luck, take care of yourself.
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    I don't think I could give you good advice for your mum otherwise maybe opening up to her about how you're feeling. But as for the maths the website keshmaths is incredible for GCSE, so if you haven't been using that complete all the topics in your specification and you should improve lots. Good luck!
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    (Original post by 303Pharma)
    Your mum sounds like a really nasty s.hitty parent. I feel bad for you seriously, what a c.rappy situation. Focus on the here and now. What you need to do to accomplish your current goals. But try this. Get somewhere quite, calm yourself, close your eyes, visualise what your life could be like five, or even ten years from now. Imagine, in as much depth as possible, just how gloriously fantastic your future life could be. Then slowly imagine the tracks you need to take to obtain that wonderful life. Then again, return to this ideal future life and reveal in the thought of it. I wish you the best of luck, take care of yourself.
    Thank you for the advice i know she is hard on me but at the end of the day she is my mum and there is nothing i can do about it…

    But i understand where you are coming from and thank you for giving me advice on how to deal with it.
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    (Original post by sabahshahed294)
    Sorry about what's going on. I know the feeling of getting compared with others' academic performances or other achievements. Makes me feel sick as well. I too faced this many times. When I was your age(I'm 19 now.), I used to HATE this thing(and I still do!) that why should I be compared with other people? Every individual is different from one another. Why should it be that just because I didn't do something as they did be considered some sort of a drawback or a way of losing self respect? It's pathetic tbh. It makes you lose your self-esteem when you go through it in a regular basis actually but the best thing would be is to ignore your mom. Yeah, it gets hard to ignore because a time comes when your temper goes up after listening to all this and you go on the verge of becoming rude with that person but yes, best way is to ignore her. If it happens that you feel depressed and you are unable to focus on your work, you may try to:-
    1. Listen to songs to refresh your mood.
    2. Take a piece of paper and write down your feelings. How you feel,why you feel like this etc and then tear that page into pieces.
    There maybe other stuff but I tend to do these things.
    Finally, don't always feel bad about your mom saying such stuff. The thing is, sometimes society can be a b*tch too. There will always be some jerks who show off their kids' academic performance(in a negative manner I mean to say.) and be like "Look, my kid got straight A*. My kid can do this and that. Why can't your kid do it?" and many other apes*it things(sometimes even making them feel that they are a failure as parents whereas they may actually end up sacrificing so many things for our betterment in the future). They actually say stuff that would cause any parent to actually feel low about themselves also hence they lose their mind and end up bombarding stuff on their own kids, without realizing the fact that they are hurting their own kids' feelings doing so. And, it's not that the kid feels bad about what happened with his/her academic performance, they do. Focus on improving yourself, work hard and keep your spirits up! Don't let such stuff let you go down! I wish you a very good luck in the future and hope things turn out positively!
    Thank you so much everything you said made complete sense! It's nice to find someone who understands how I'm feeling
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thank you so much everything you said made complete sense! It's nice to find someone who understands how I'm feeling
    No problem.
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    I'm really sorry to hear that.

    You can PM me anytime you want if you ever need to talk and I can help you with getting your C in GCSE Maths as I've done some degree level maths and got a good score.

    Your mom does sound immature and she is not allowed to compare you to other or start randomly shouting at you and putting you down. She honestly sounds like she's the one with problems, perhaps she's going through a hard time. If other people are hard on us, it's a reflection of what's going on in their mind

    .All in all, just focus on your goals, you can definitely achieve them! It will get much better as you get older. Just focus on improving your own life.

    Good Luck!
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    (Original post by Analyst89)
    I'm really sorry to hear that.

    You can PM me anytime you want if you ever need to talk and I can help you with getting your C in GCSE Maths as I've done some degree level maths and got a good score.

    Your mom does sound immature and she is not allowed to compare you to other or start randomly shouting at you and putting you down. She honestly sounds like she's the one with problems, perhaps she's going through a hard time. If other people are hard on us, it's a reflection of what's going on in their mind

    .All in all, just focus on your goals, you can definitely achieve them! It will get much better as you get older. Just focus on improving your own life.

    Good Luck!
    Thank you for the support and if i am ever stuck with maths i know just who to PM!

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    Honestly, just tell your Mum to **** off because you are trying your best and taking 3 a levels. It's not like you don't care. More to the point, your Mum is supposed to be encouraging and supporting you, not comparing to your friends over this knowing how much it'll upset you.
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    (Original post by Ishax)
    Honestly, just tell your Mum to **** off because you are trying your best and taking 3 a levels. It's not like you don't care. More to the point, your Mum is supposed to be encouraging and supporting you, not comparing to your friends over this knowing how much it'll upset you.
    I wish it were that easy if i ever were to say such a thing she would hit me and i hate when she's angry it grinds me down so much.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I wish it were that easy if i ever were to say such a thing she would hit me and i hate when she's angry it grinds me down so much.
    Maybe not say those exact words, but just stand up for yourself and explain that you're trying. Tell her how much it upsets you when she compares you like this.

    Plus, she's not allowed to hit you. She can get arrested. What is wrong with parents? Hitting your child at 17, omg. Isn't that embarrassing? My brothers 12 and he's never been hit in like years, I don't even know how many to be exact.
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    (Original post by Ishax)
    Maybe not say that exact word, but just stand up for yourself and explain that you're trying. Tell her how much it upsets you when she compares you like this.
    It's hard it really is.. i always do but then she plays the "well you should have…" card and then gets me so upset and wound up. Or she just says "why are you trying to go against me?" when I'm not…

    I know i should just ignore it but it is hard. Thank you though!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's hard it really is.. i always do but then she plays the "well you should have…" card and then gets me so upset and wound up. Or she just says "why are you trying to go against me?" when I'm not…

    I know i should just ignore it but it is hard. Thank you though!
    Just stop speaking to her, then she'll realise.
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    (Original post by Ishax)
    Plus, she's not allowed to hit you. She can get arrested. What is wrong with parents? Hitting your child at 17, omg. Isn't that embarrassing? My brothers 12 and he's never been hit in like years, I don't even know how many to be exact.
    Yeah i know. It can be embarrassing but no one knows my friends do but they pity me or don't talk about it. It's always awkward when we talk about our friends mum's because they don't like to mention mine.. it hurts because she's not always like this only when she is annoyed or angry at me most of the time she is a good mum and i do love her.
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    (Original post by Ishax)
    Just stop speaking to her, then she'll realise.
    Yeah true. Thank you.
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    I think she just cares about me, maybe a little too much but i know she only wants what's best for me.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thank you for this advice but I'm not ready to leave home just yet and don't want to be separated from my family and I'm not allowed to go out alone so to buy a phone will be dangerous for me because i will most likely get caught plus i don't have any of my own money and as for a job i want one for experience on my CV but apparently this will distract me from my studies so i can't plus my mum thinks I'm a "slut" for reasons i can't explain so does not trust me to go out. Even uni i have to go to and from and won't be allowed to stay there and have to go to my local one which does not even have the course i want to study…

    Getting organisations in to help will just cause problems and won't be confidential so i partly don't trust them and by getting financial support will be hard to get out of and i don't want to be depend on organisations all my life.

    But i appreciate all you said and thank you for taking the time to listen to me.
    If buying a phone for £10 would be dangerous for you then it's best that you don't do it. Perhaps you could send your friends emails using school computers? Or is that dangerous too?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I just can't deal with my life atm. I'm 16 (female) and want to just get away from this Hell.

    I'm retaking my maths in November and I'm currently taking 3 A-levels which is too much stress as it is but my mum is not supporting me at all she is always in my case (shouting, hitting me) and she always compare me to my friends and what grade they got at GCSE then she spits at me and calls me a "disappointment" which she has done numerous times and i have enough things on my plate atm.

    I want this C in maths so badly and work hard but she doesn't believe me when i say i revise she doesn't trust me on my phone so has taken it away from me (which i don't mind but that means i can't talk to my friends or tell them how i feel) they know this about my mum so don't trust me or have the confidence to ask me to go out with them.
    You mum is a seriously *****y human being. If she ever lays a hand on you again, contact the police. This is abuse, and you should never have to tolerate it.
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    (Original post by Horsedobbin)
    If buying a phone for £10 would be dangerous for you then it's best that you don't do it. Perhaps you could send your friends emails using school computers? Or is that dangerous too?
    No it's okay though too risky and i don't really talk on the phone to my friends and if i do i can never be too attached with them because then if my mum finds out I would be screwed… Thank you though!
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    (Original post by 303Pharma)
    You mum is a seriously *****y human being. If she ever lays a hand on you again, contact the police. This is abuse, and you should never have to tolerate it.
    I could never call the police on anyone in my family it would hurt me too much and i would have to live with that guilt and would go against everything I've been taught. I love her too much to break her heart. I guess i have to just live with it.

    Thank you though!
 
 
 
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