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Girlfirend wants me to work out and get abs?

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    She doesn't ask me why I don't look like that... she just mentions that they have good abs whenever we watch a movie or a tv show where someone has his shirt off
    Hmm, that's a tricky one, thinking about it. *She might be mentioning this because she's so confident and comfortable with the strength of your relationship, and to her it's just a statement of fact - you can't exactly argue with the sentiment. *In this case, I think we could describe it as 'insensitive'. *But you have taken the view that her saying this actually is indicative that she might want you to look similar to this. *I wouldn't discount the former idea, but you could always just ask her directly, particularly if your relationship with her is as strong as you suggest. *You'd probably get further than asking on TSR!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    No it's not really like that, we're in quite a serious relationship
    Said many guys before a harsh breakup. You should never get so comfortable as to believe your relationship is unbreakable.
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    (Original post by DarthRoar)
    Said many guys before a harsh breakup. You should never get so comfortable as to believe your relationship is unbreakable.
    That attitude would make marriage quite a challenge though, wouldn't it...?
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    (Original post by Reality Check)
    That attitude would make marriage quite a challenge though, wouldn't it...?
    Indeed, which is why I don't support or like the idea of marriage. If you need one to help 'strengthen' your bond then it wasn't a very good one in the first place.
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    Switch it up! When you see a good lookin' girl on the telly, say how good she looks!
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    (Original post by donutellme)
    Go make yourself some mo gains

    @eden3 tell him mayne tell him
    Yeahhhhh OP needs to make some gainz mayne, More gainz = more creampies mayne all kinds of nut bustin action !! alll kinndddzzz
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    (Original post by HelpMyGerman)
    Yeahhhhh OP needs to make some gainz mayne, More gainz = more creampies mayne all kinds of nut bustin action !! alll kinndddzzz
    Preach it brotha!!!! AYMENNNNNNNN
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    (Original post by Reality Check)
    That attitude would make marriage quite a challenge though, wouldn't it...?
    And marriages are always happy and never end.*
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    (Original post by TurboCretin)
    And marriages are always happy and never end.*
    Well that is sort of the aim - people don't usually set about to have an unsuccessful marriage
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    I would say go for it. Whatever makes her happy
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    Do it do it do it It will make you happy and your girlfriend happy! Also, you will feel more healthy. As long as you dont feel pressurized! Working out gets fun after a while esp with music
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    I understand the appeal of having a body like Channing Tatum but you have to think. If she honestly would want you to change that much, its not good for you. She should love you for you. If you feel like making that change then go for it. But make sure that that is what YOU want.
    #2

    Do it. It's a great way to show that you care
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    (Original post by Reality Check)
    Well that is sort of the aim - people don't usually set about to have an unsuccessful marriage
    Of course they don't, but a great way to have one is to stop putting effort into the relationship.*
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Basically, me and my girlfriend have been going out for nearly a year and we started living together. I'm not a fat guy by any means- I'm of average build but I'm not that muscular. My girlfriend isn't muscular either but she is lean and has a good body (not biased)

    The thing is that when we watch movies and tv and there is some Channing Tatum/Brad Pitt/Ryan Gosling kind of guy with a great body and abs, she always points it out and says what a great body they have. She's never told me to work out and get ripped but it's kinda clear that she would probably prefer me to be more built in terms of my upper body.

    My question is: should I do it? Do girls actually find it a big turn on? Or is it just a small difference in terms of attraction? I am a tally considering going to the gym and putting some effort in to look better and get visible abs but it's a lot of work so I wanna know whether it's actually worth it? We're pretty serious now in terms of the relationship.
    Regardless of whether your girlfriend finds it attractive or not, you should do it for your own good.
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    A lot of bad advice here (sorry but it's true). No, you should not do it either because she wants you to or because you're insecure because you THINK she wants you to. The only instance you should do this is for yourself because you want to.

    Coming from a girl's point of view, don't do it because you think it's what she wants. You have to do these things for yourself, and if she truly is not happy with the way you look and wants you to change for her, then that's shallow and cruel. I love my partner, squashiness and all, and I would not expect him to change physically or in any other way for me because that's not being a decent human being. People have to want to change for themselves, and any party in a relationship who is attempting to influence you to change should raise some serious red flags.

    I've been in a relationship for 10 years and I'm now 30. If anything has taught me anything, it's TALK TO EACH OTHER. The value of this advice cannot be underestimated. Tell her how it's making you feel and you feel like she wants you to look like these men.

    Imagine if it were the other way around. How would she feel if you pointed out fit women on the TV all the time and said how attractive they are?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Basically, me and my girlfriend have been going out for nearly a year and we started living together. I'm not a fat guy by any means- I'm of average build but I'm not that muscular. My girlfriend isn't muscular either but she is lean and has a good body (not biased)

    The thing is that when we watch movies and tv and there is some Channing Tatum/Brad Pitt/Ryan Gosling kind of guy with a great body and abs, she always points it out and says what a great body they have. She's never told me to work out and get ripped but it's kinda clear that she would probably prefer me to be more built in terms of my upper body.

    My question is: should I do it? Do girls actually find it a big turn on? Or is it just a small difference in terms of attraction? I am a tally considering going to the gym and putting some effort in to look better and get visible abs but it's a lot of work so I wanna know whether it's actually worth it? We're pretty serious now in terms of the relationship.
    Well first things first, you should only do it for you rather than her. I'd like my next girlfriend to have the body of Katrina-Johnson-Thompson, i accept its unlikely that said girl will go to the effort of making her body look like that for me. Clearly there are health benefits though and muscular men online have commented that once past a certain point they do garner extra attention.

    I can see how her comments may be annoying for you. One of my exes used to comment every now and then on how hot certain guys were and while not jealous (these were random people and it's not like i don't look around) i did decide to return the comments on another girl or two.. needless to say she went potty. Always remember that modern women are mostly entitled hypocrites.. wonderful, but entitled hypocrites.

    Having made a decision you then need to decide what you want in body terms. Do you want a muscular body with abs, or do you just want scabs (skinny abs). Regarding timing, muscle is not quick to grow and you'll need an hour most days.
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    #1

    (Original post by adollop)
    Regardless of whether your girlfriend finds it attractive or not, you should do it for your own good.
    Thanks, I'll be hitting the gym soon!
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by akemikat)
    A lot of bad advice here (sorry but it's true). No, you should not do it either because she wants you to or because you're insecure because you THINK she wants you to. The only instance you should do this is for yourself because you want to.

    Coming from a girl's point of view, don't do it because you think it's what she wants. You have to do these things for yourself, and if she truly is not happy with the way you look and wants you to change for her, then that's shallow and cruel. I love my partner, squashiness and all, and I would not expect him to change physically or in any other way for me because that's not being a decent human being. People have to want to change for themselves, and any party in a relationship who is attempting to influence you to change should raise some serious red flags.

    I've been in a relationship for 10 years and I'm now 30. If anything has taught me anything, it's TALK TO EACH OTHER. The value of this advice cannot be underestimated. Tell her how it's making you feel and you feel like she wants you to look like these men.

    Imagine if it were the other way around. How would she feel if you pointed out fit women on the TV all the time and said how attractive they are?
    Lol she'd probably get a bit annoyed if I pointed out fit women haha

    But I've decided that I will actually try and go to the gym more and get a better body, not just to make her happy but generally since it's good to keep fit!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Basically, me and my girlfriend have been going out for nearly a year and we started living together. I'm not a fat guy by any means- I'm of average build but I'm not that muscular. My girlfriend isn't muscular either but she is lean and has a good body (not biased)

    The thing is that when we watch movies and tv and there is some Channing Tatum/Brad Pitt/Ryan Gosling kind of guy with a great body and abs, she always points it out and says what a great body they have. She's never told me to work out and get ripped but it's kinda clear that she would probably prefer me to be more built in terms of my upper body.

    My question is: should I do it? Do girls actually find it a big turn on? Or is it just a small difference in terms of attraction? I am a tally considering going to the gym and putting some effort in to look better and get visible abs but it's a lot of work so I wanna know whether it's actually worth it? We're pretty serious now in terms of the relationship.
    Go For It
 
 
 
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