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Is my teacher too close to me? watch

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    Periods as in school timetable or your cycle? Lmao
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    hey op. NGL it's a weird situation but I think as of now it's still up for control. If you both are genuine friends, and he is a god teacher (remember why you're in school at all) then I think I'd let it stay as it is. But you have to be very careful, because the minute things go "deeper" you run. You run like the wind and make a distance. There is a fine line between appropriate and inappropriate and your relationship is pressed tight against that line. The minute things go too far you have to act. That is not to say that something bad will happen. You both could continue as you are for the rest of the year and it will never escalate beyond a strange friendship.
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    Do you mind if I ask you how old you are, OP?
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    God I remember this story. I didn't know he had hit on other girls too. That's just pervy,creepy and wrong. When they ran away to France together I thought it was very romantic; that they were genuinely in love with each other and I guess sometimes these things happen. They should have waited until she was 16 and had left school, but people are only human. At least that was my understanding of the story at the time. But him going after other underage girls too puts it in a completely different perspective.
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    (Original post by Glasgowcaits)
    This is my first post so sorry if this is the wrong forum..and its not one of these 'in love with my teacher' things..I just want to know you guys' opinion on how close is inappropriate for a teacher and pupil.

    I have two classes with this one teacher (let's call him Mr A). He's been at our school 2 years and we've always got on well because of our shared interest in one of these subjects - my life passion and his job. I get on great with all my teachers and my school is pretty small (350ish pupils) so it's not that weird.

    At first we had a jokey relationship but at the start of last year a group of girls in my year were picking on me and he found out & dealt with it brilliantly. I started talking to him more often and about more 'serious' stuff. I usually get picked up from school about half an hour after it ends because of my mums job and started sometimes dropping in to borrow a book or something and we'd chat till she came.

    But this year...I don't know. One of my classes with him is actually one I'm self studying but it's his speciality, so two nights a week I stay till 4.30 and we go over the work, he sets it for the week & marks it etc. Or we're meant to...we basically spend the hour discussing our own lives. He *****es about my other class with him and the people in it and how much he hates it. We just chat about the most random stuff, have a laugh and that.

    Yesterday our class got rescheduled for 6pm because of his conmitments. It was supposed to end at 7 but we stayed in school till 8.30 talking about completely unrelated stuff to the work. We've discussed my periods in detail (there is a simple explanation though) and have nicknames ....

    On top of this class and our others we chat whenever we see each other at school. We have loads of inside jokes which he brings up in class knowing only I'll get them. Everyone remarks on this and my friends think he's much closer to me than anyone else...it's NOTHING sexual/sinister on either of our parts but nothing normal..is this too much ?

    Are we too close bearing in mind we're teacher & pupil or not? If so what shouls I do? Sorry its a bit long,just had to get this out here.
    This is all a big no-no for him. It's unprofessional and he has crossed boundaries. If the school found out he could find himself in quite a bit of trouble. I'm pretty sure he's broken a number of rules/policies on parent-teacher relationships already.
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    im frineds wiht my teaha too. Its nkot strange teachrs are people too just dont get too personal
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    (Original post by Luke7456)
    maybe this is me been autistic and maybe this is why its bad idea for me to go into teaching but I don't see whats so bad about this. I mean sure if he pursues you romantically or something like that happens thats a big no no. But whats wrong with a teacher been matey with a student?
    The fact that he is now biased towards one if his students, which isn't fair to the other students. That's the point of a professional distance.
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    (Original post by Luke7456)
    maybe this is me been autistic and maybe this is why its bad idea for me to go into teaching but I don't see whats so bad about this. I mean sure if he pursues you romantically or something like that happens thats a big no no. But whats wrong with a teacher been matey with a student?
    Because he's not there to be 'your mate'. He's there to teach you in a professional capacity as his job.
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    (Original post by Glasgowcaits)
    This is my first post so sorry if this is the wrong forum..and its not one of these 'in love with my teacher' things..I just want to know you guys' opinion on how close is inappropriate for a teacher and pupil.

    I have two classes with this one teacher (let's call him Mr A). He's been at our school 2 years and we've always got on well because of our shared interest in one of these subjects - my life passion and his job. I get on great with all my teachers and my school is pretty small (350ish pupils) so it's not that weird.

    At first we had a jokey relationship but at the start of last year a group of girls in my year were picking on me and he found out & dealt with it brilliantly. I started talking to him more often and about more 'serious' stuff. I usually get picked up from school about half an hour after it ends because of my mums job and started sometimes dropping in to borrow a book or something and we'd chat till she came.

    But this year...I don't know. One of my classes with him is actually one I'm self studying but it's his speciality, so two nights a week I stay till 4.30 and we go over the work, he sets it for the week & marks it etc. Or we're meant to...we basically spend the hour discussing our own lives. He *****es about my other class with him and the people in it and how much he hates it. We just chat about the most random stuff, have a laugh and that.

    Yesterday our class got rescheduled for 6pm because of his conmitments. It was supposed to end at 7 but we stayed in school till 8.30 talking about completely unrelated stuff to the work. We've discussed my periods in detail (there is a simple explanation though) and have nicknames ....

    On top of this class and our others we chat whenever we see each other at school. We have loads of inside jokes which he brings up in class knowing only I'll get them. Everyone remarks on this and my friends think he's much closer to me than anyone else...it's NOTHING sexual/sinister on either of our parts but nothing normal..is this too much ?

    Are we too close bearing in mind we're teacher & pupil or not? If so what shouls I do? Sorry its a bit long,just had to get this out here.
    That is way too close buddy.
    Not a good idea.
    Don't try and escalate it.
    If you're being teased about it, then things are going wrong.
    My advice: stop talking to him immediately
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    (Original post by animeamanda1412)
    I'd say this is fine, from the description, I'd see it as a close relationship between two friends, im sure its fine
    His job is to be her teacher, not her friend.
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    (Original post by Reality Check)
    Because he's not there to be 'your mate'. He's there to teach you in a professional capacity as his job.
    You got it in one

    (PRSOM etc etc)
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    Made an appointment to speak to my deputy about it tomorrow, so I guess we'll see how it goes..thanks everyone for your help so far
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    I dunno how you can stay in school and chat to a teacher like that. I do my best efforts to avoid this type of thing. I find it a little awkward when a teacher talks to you as if he's your pal.


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    (Original post by Glasgowcaits)
    I have called him by his first name a few times as a joke, and no, I have no interest in touching his **** 😂
    Hmm okay, but yeah you're teacher is too close to you and may be frowned upon by others so it isn't a good idea, somewhere in your deep subconscious I think you know it too otherwise the question wouldn't have been asked. I personally think its adorable though you don't have to cut him out completey just start drawing a line.
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    (Original post by bones-mccoy)
    His job is to be her teacher, not her friend.
    he can be her teacher and friend at the same time...
    as long as the relationship isnt romantic or anything, then whats wrong with that??
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    (Original post by animeamanda1412)
    he can be her teacher and friend at the same time...
    as long as the relationship isnt romantic or anything, then whats wrong with that??
    Agree with this
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    (Original post by Popsiclez)
    Agree with this
    thank you
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    "We've discussed my periods in detail"

    What the ****? That's extremely inappropriate.
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    (Original post by Glasgowcaits)
    This is my first post so sorry if this is the wrong forum..and its not one of these 'in love with my teacher' things..I just want to know you guys' opinion on how close is inappropriate for a teacher and pupil.

    I have two classes with this one teacher (let's call him Mr A). He's been at our school 2 years and we've always got on well because of our shared interest in one of these subjects - my life passion and his job. I get on great with all my teachers and my school is pretty small (350ish pupils) so it's not that weird.

    At first we had a jokey relationship but at the start of last year a group of girls in my year were picking on me and he found out & dealt with it brilliantly. I started talking to him more often and about more 'serious' stuff. I usually get picked up from school about half an hour after it ends because of my mums job and started sometimes dropping in to borrow a book or something and we'd chat till she came.

    But this year...I don't know. One of my classes with him is actually one I'm self studying but it's his speciality, so two nights a week I stay till 4.30 and we go over the work, he sets it for the week & marks it etc. Or we're meant to...we basically spend the hour discussing our own lives. He *****es about my other class with him and the people in it and how much he hates it. We just chat about the most random stuff, have a laugh and that.

    Yesterday our class got rescheduled for 6pm because of his conmitments. It was supposed to end at 7 but we stayed in school till 8.30 talking about completely unrelated stuff to the work. We've discussed my periods in detail (there is a simple explanation though) and have nicknames ....

    On top of this class and our others we chat whenever we see each other at school. We have loads of inside jokes which he brings up in class knowing only I'll get them. Everyone remarks on this and my friends think he's much closer to me than anyone else...it's NOTHING sexual/sinister on either of our parts but nothing normal..is this too much ?

    Are we too close bearing in mind we're teacher & pupil or not? If so what shouls I do? Sorry its a bit long,just had to get this out here.
    How old are you, if I may ask? If your like 14, then I'd say it's creepy as hell, not if your 16ish then that's when you can have a better relationship with your teachers, when you move up to A levels. I would say it's fine, for now. Though is he starts talking about sexual stuff it might be getting slightly out of hand, but at the moment to me he just sounds like a decent guy, who's perhaps not entirely professional, but not doing anything creepy as of yet.
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    "He's very matey with lots of the other girls, not so much the boys"

    :eyebrow:
 
 
 
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