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To be, or not to be watch

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    (Original post by CorpusLuteum)
    More importantly why is google plus giving you relationship advice
    I know right!!
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    (Original post by Google+)
    Well you don't need to prove it to her. It's nothing to do with her it's you in the relationship
    She believes I'll be happier if I get back together with him
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    (Original post by VioletBlueGreen)
    She believes I'll be happier if I get back together with him
    Who cares what she believes though. You won't because it's gonna either end in break up/cheating or fighting. You don't love him u are obviously not going to marry him so youll obviously end up splitting and being sad then.
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    (Original post by VioletBlueGreen)
    He knows I don't love him but i'll give the second point a go.
    Ok go ahead.
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    No cos then that's just gonna make you unhappy. Forget about him and move on with your life.
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    (Original post by VioletBlueGreen)
    Should I go back out with my ex even if I don't love him?
    you should tell him kindly if you dont want to be with him. if you are fed up does
    he actaully know that's how you feel? or are you fed up and just expecting him to know you are fed up without telling him you feel tired by all of this? have you spoken to him?

    even if you have told him and he didnt get the message (because he still likes you) then you have to tell him again in a gentle, kind way.

    some people just take a bit longer to understand when things are not going anywhere, but that doesnt make them losers, they are emotional and sensitive
    thats all.

    we all get vunerable at times, and its kinder to treat others how you would like to be treated, especially where feelings you cant control are involved.

    it isnt fair to block, ghost, or just not talk to people if you know they like you and you are not into them. its just immature and a bit selfish really. if you are honest but not cruel they will hopefully start to realise you just don't love or want them in the way they would like.

    just out of interest, what makes the freind SO sure that you are so good for each other?

    did you go out for a long time? maybe you should give him a few reasons why you dotn want to do this now as well, that might help his feelings a bit more to understand things from your point of view. wouldnt you want someone you liked but didn't want you to at least be fair with you and maybe give you some reasons (if you havent already). i wonder if there might be more to this situation than we know, and that is why your freind is so certain that you should get back together?

    kindness don't cost anything!
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    (Original post by VioletBlueGreen)
    We broke up on what I thought was good terms and remained what I believed was good friends afterwards. It was my decision to break up with him but with the hassle its created its starting to feel like the wrong decision to have made.
    I dated a guy at 16 and ended things as I didn't have feelings for him. We were unfortunately in the same class in sixth form. He would say to others how he had his heart broken even though I was in the room so knew he meant me called me a ***** for doing it.
    When we were alone he would beg me to go back to him saying how I should stop being a ***** to him.
    I thought how much respect he had for me by calling me a *****! He made me feel so guilty I was tempted to go back to him as he wouldn't leave me alone but I thought I'm going to end up breaking up with him again it's not going to work never had strong feelings for him when we were together and the way he was manipulating I knew I made the right choice by not going back to him.

    Don't go back to him block him and tell the friend it's your life and for her to mind her own business if she is so concerned she should go out with him instead.
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    (Original post by bluedog123)
    you should tell him kindly if you dont want to be with him. if you are fed up does
    he actaully know that's how you feel? or are you fed up and just expecting him to know you are fed up without telling him you feel tired by all of this? have you spoken to him?

    even if you have told him and he didnt get the message (because he still likes you) then you have to tell him again in a gentle, kind way.

    some people just take a bit longer to understand when things are not going anywhere, but that doesnt make them losers, they are emotional and sensitive
    thats all.

    we all get vunerable at times, and its kinder to treat others how you would like to be treated, especially where feelings you cant control are involved.

    it isnt fair to block, ghost, or just not talk to people if you know they like you and you are not into them. its just immature and a bit selfish really. if you are honest but not cruel they will hopefully start to realise you just don't love or want them in the way they would like.

    just out of interest, what makes the freind SO sure that you are so good for each other?

    did you go out for a long time? maybe you should give him a few reasons why you dotn want to do this now as well, that might help his feelings a bit more to understand things from your point of view. wouldnt you want someone you liked but didn't want you to at least be fair with you and maybe give you some reasons (if you havent already). i wonder if there might be more to this situation than we know, and that is why your freind is so certain that you should get back together?

    kindness don't cost anything!
    He does know, because I have told him before. Your advice is the best I feel I have been given so far so I'll take it on board.

    My friend thinks we're good together because he really helped me when I was at a rather low point in my life. We didn't go out for one long period of time but a couple of short periods of time. She thinks we should get back together because I'm not as happy as she has known me to be, although I have tried to explain to her that this is literally because of A-Levels and my head of sixth form.
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    (Original post by VioletBlueGreen)
    Should I go back out with my ex even if I don't love him?
    if you dont love him why on earth would you get back with him. Go and find someone that you actually like
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    (Original post by chikane)
    I dated a guy at 16 and ended things as I didn't have feelings for him. We were unfortunately in the same class in sixth form. He would say to others how he had his heart broken even though I was in the room so knew he meant me called me a ***** for doing it.
    When we were alone he would beg me to go back to him saying how I should stop being a ***** to him.
    I thought how much respect he had for me by calling me a *****! He made me feel so guilty I was tempted to go back to him as he wouldn't leave me alone but I thought I'm going to end up breaking up with him again it's not going to work never had strong feelings for him when we were together and the way he was manipulating I knew I made the right choice by not going back to him.

    Don't go back to him block him and tell the friend it's your life and for her to mind her own business if she is so concerned she should go out with him instead.
    Your ex sounds exactly like the guy I was contemplating on getting back together with.

    I'm thinking that my friend might fancy him herself and by trying to make me go back out with him, she won't feel as guilty for having feelings for him or maybe she's hoping her feelings disappear??
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    (Original post by Angell99)
    if you dont love him why on earth would you get back with him. Go and find someone that you actually like
    Summary - Peer Pressure and Ex Pressure?? Is ex pressure a thing?
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    (Original post by VioletBlueGreen)
    Summary - Peer Pressure and Ex Pressure?? Is ex pressure a thing?
    ex pressure should be a thing haha and do what you think is right not what others say
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    (Original post by Angell99)
    ex pressure should be a thing haha and do what you think is right not what others say
    I think I shouldn't get back together with him and that whilst I don't get back together with him, I get a better friend that listens to me XD
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    (Original post by VioletBlueGreen)
    I think I shouldn't get back together with him and that whilst I don't get back together with him, I get a better friend that listens to me XD
    im glad you found someone better. good luck girlee x
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    (Original post by VioletBlueGreen)
    Your ex sounds exactly like the guy I was contemplating on getting back together with.

    I'm thinking that my friend might fancy him herself and by trying to make me go back out with him, she won't feel as guilty for having feelings for him or maybe she's hoping her feelings disappear??
    If she was a good 'friend' she would think more of your happiness than your ex's. If my friend didnt want to get back together with an ex i would tell the guy to back off and leave her alone. I don't understand why she would pressure you to get back with him if she does have feelings then that is her problem.
    The guy should respect your decision tell him next time if he really cared or loved you he would let you go and let you move on with your life if he still harasses you threaten him with the police.
    This ex was still asking me to go out with him years later saying he never loved anyone like me and i wanted him to move on with his life so told him i dont have feelings and never will and he unfriended me on fb and never heard from him again (there was more to this conversation but i won't reveal what actually was said).
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    (Original post by chikane)
    If she was a good 'friend' she would think more of your happiness than your ex's. If my friend didnt want to get back together with an ex i would tell the guy to back off and leave her alone. I don't understand why she would pressure you to get back with him if she does have feelings then that is her problem.
    The guy should respect your decision tell him next time if he really cared or loved you he would let you go and let you move on with your life if he still harasses you threaten him with the police.
    This ex was still asking me to go out with him years later saying he never loved anyone like me and i wanted him to move on with his life so told him i dont have feelings and never will and he unfriended me on fb and never heard from him again (there was more to this conversation but i won't reveal what actually was said).
    I agree with you.

    How did you cope with your ex considering he kept at it years later? (You don't have to answer that if you don't want to btw)
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    (Original post by VioletBlueGreen)
    I agree with you.

    How did you cope with your ex considering he kept at it years later? (You don't have to answer that if you don't want to btw)
    Well we went out at 16 ended it and then found out i had to be in the same class with him for another 2 years at sixth form when we were alone he would ask me to go back to him and i was firm and kept saying no and he eventually took the hint and left me alone, we had mutual friends then and they knew he liked me and i would share how he made me feel guilty so i think they told him to back off too.

    It was until i went to uni i bumped into him and he messaged me on fb telling me he loved me and i could have blocked him but decided to be honest and i felt sorry for him and felt bad he still had strong feelings but i told him he needs to move on also he never really knew me we never shared anything together he was too interested in himself and made me feel bad too. Looking back he was very manipulative making me feel awful for ending it and thought glad i have escaped him.

    It was never going to work i actually ended it by text the first time i was 16 and a coward but i didnt want to keep leading him on.

    If you dont see either of them much its easier if you are in classes its hard.
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    (Original post by chikane)
    Well we went out at 16 ended it and then found out i had to be in the same class with him for another 2 years at sixth form when we were alone he would ask me to go back to him and i was firm and kept saying no and he eventually took the hint and left me alone, we had mutual friends then and they knew he liked me and i would share how he made me feel guilty so i think they told him to back off too.

    It was until i went to uni i bumped into him and he messaged me on fb telling me he loved me and i could have blocked him but decided to be honest and i felt sorry for him and felt bad he still had strong feelings but i told him he needs to move on also he never really knew me we never shared anything together he was too interested in himself and made me feel bad too. Looking back he was very manipulative making me feel awful for ending it and thought glad i have escaped him.

    It was never going to work i actually ended it by text the first time i was 16 and a coward but i didnt want to keep leading him on.

    If you dont see either of them much its easier if you are in classes its hard.
    I've been rather lucky because he isn't in my sixth form but he does have my number and my social media account names.
 
 
 
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